第5章

Hersympathieswerechieflywiththecow。ItoldherIhadhopesofRobina’sdevelopingintoasensiblewoman。WetalkedquiteadealaboutRobina。Weagreedthatbetweenuswehadaccomplishedsomethingratherclever。

"ImustgetbackassoonasIcan，"Isaid。"Idon’twantyoungButegettingwrongideasintohishead。"

"WhoisyoungBute？"sheasked。

"Thearchitect，"Iexplained。

"Ithoughthewasanoldman，"saidEthelbertha。

"OldSpreightisoldenough，"Isaid。"YoungButeisoneofhisyoungmen；butheunderstandshiswork，andseemsintelligent。"

"What’shelike？"sheasked。

"Personally，anexceedinglyniceyoungfellow。There’sagooddealofsenseinhim。Ilikeaboywholistens。"

"Good—looking？"sheasked。

"Notobjectionablyso，"Ireplied。"Apleasantface——particularlywhenhesmiles。"

"Ishemarried？"sheasked。

"Really，itdidnotoccurtometoaskhim，"Iadmitted。"Howcuriousyouwomenare！No，Idon’tthinkso。Ishouldsaynot。"

"Whydon’tyouthinkso？"shedemanded。

"Oh，Idon’tknow。Hedoesn’tgiveyoutheideaofamarriedman。

You’lllikehim。Seemssofondofhissister。"

"Shallwebeseeingmuchofhim？"sheasked。

"Agoodishdeal，"Ianswered。"IexpecthewillbegoingdownonMonday。Veryannoying，thisstovebusiness。"

"Whatistheuseofhisbeingtherewithoutyou？"Ethelberthawantedtoknow。

"Oh，he’llpotterround，"Isuggested，"andtakemeasurements。Dickwillbeabouttoexplainthingstohim。Or，ifheisn’t，there’sRobina——awkwardthingis，Robinaseemstohavetakenadisliketohim。"

"Whyhasshetakenadisliketohim？"askedEthelbertha。

"Oh，becausehemistookthebackofthehouseforthefront，orthefrontofthehousefortheback，"Iexplained；"Iforgetwhichnow。

Saysit’shissmilethatirritatesher。Sheownsherselfthere’snorealreason。"

"Whenwillyoubegoingdownagain？"Ethelberthaasked。

"OnThursdaynext，"Itoldher；"stoveornostove。"

Shesaidshewouldcomewithme。Shefeltthechangewoulddohergood，andpromisednottodoanythingwhenshegotthere。AndthenI

toldherallthatIhaddoneforDick。

"Theordinaryfarmer，"Ipointedouttoher，"issooftenahaphazardtypeofmanwithnoideas。Ifsuccessful，itisbyreasonofanaturalinstinctwhichcannotbetaught。St。Leonardhasstudiedthetheoryofthething。FromhimDickwilllearnallthatcanbelearntaboutfarming。Theselection，Ifelt，demandedcarefuljudgment。"

"ButwillDicksticktoit？"Ethelberthawondered。

"There，again，"Ipointedouttoher，"thechoicewasonecallingforexceptionalforesight。Theoldman——asamatteroffact，heisn’toldatall；can’tbeverymucholderthanmyself；Idon’tknowwhytheyallcallhimtheoldman——hasformedahighopinionofDick。

Hisdaughtertoldmeso，andIhavetakencaretoletDickknowit。

Theboywillnotcaretodisappointhim。Hermother——"

"Whosemother？"interruptedEthelbertha。

"Janie’smother，Mrs。St。Leonard，"Iexplained。"Shealsohasformedagoodopinionofhim。Thechildrenlikehim。Janietoldmeso。"

"Sheseemstodoagoodishdealoftalking，thisMissJanie，"

remarkedEthelbertha。

"Youwilllikeher，"Isaid。"Sheisacharminggirl——sosensible，andgood，andunselfish，and——"

"Whotoldyouallthisabouther？"interruptedEthelbertha。

"Youcanseeitforyourself，"Ianswered。"Themotherappearstobeanonentity，andSt。Leonardhimself——well，heisnotabusinessman。

ItisJaniewhomanageseverything——keepseverythinggoing。"

"Whatisshelike？"askedEthelbertha。

"Iamtellingyou，"Isaid。"Sheissopractical，andyetatthesametime——"

"Inappearance，Imean，"explainedEthelbertha。

"Howyouwomen，"Isaid，"doworryaboutmerelooks！Whatdoesitmatter？Ifyouwanttoknow，itisthatsortoffacethatgrowsuponyou。Atfirstyoudonotnoticehowbeautifulitis，butwhenyoucometolookintoit——"

"AndhasshealsoformedahighopinionofDick？"interruptedEthelbertha。

"Shewillbedisappointedinhim，"Isaid，"ifhedoesnotworkhardandsticktoit。Theywillallbedisappointedinhim。"

"What’sitgottodowiththem？"demandedEthelbertha。

"I’mnotthinkingaboutthem，"Isaid。"WhatIlookatis——"

"Idon’tlikeher，"saidEthelbertha。"Idon’tlikeanyofthem。"

"But——"Shedidn’tseemtobelistening。

"Iknowthatclassofman，"shesaid；"andthewifeappears，ifanything，tobeworse。Asforthegirl——"

"Whenyoucometoknowthem——"Isaid。

Shesaidshedidn’twanttoknowthem。ShewantedtogodownonMonday，early。

Igothertosee——ittooksomelittletime——thedisadvantagesofthis。WeshouldonlybeaddingtoRobina’stroubles；andchangeofplannowwouldunsettleDick’smind。

"Hehaspromisedtowriteme，"Isaid，"andtellmetheresultofhisfirstday’sexperience。Letuswaitandhearwhathesays。"

Shesaidthatwhatevercouldhavepossessedhertoletmetakethosepoorunfortunatechildrenawayfromher，andmuddleupeverythingwithouther，wasamysterytoherself。Shehopedthat，atleast，I

haddonenothingirrevocableinthecaseofVeronica。

"Veronica，"Isaid，"isreallywishful，Ithink，toimprove。Ihaveboughtheradonkey。"

"Awhat？"exclaimedEthelbertha。

"Adonkey，"Irepeated。"Thechildtookafancytoit，andweallagreeditmighthelptosteadyher——giveherasenseofresponsibility。"

"Isomehowfeltyouhadn’toverlookedVeronica，"saidEthelbertha。

Ithoughtitbesttochangetheconversation。Sheseemedinafretfulmood。

CHAPTERVIII

Robina’sletterwasdatedMondayevening，andreachedusTuesdaymorning。

"Ihopeyoucaughtyourtrain，"shewrote。"Veronicadidnotgetbacktillhalf—pastsix。Sheinformedmethatyouandshehadfoundagooddealtotalkabout，andthat’onethinghadledtoanother。’

Sheisaquaintyoungimp，butIthinkyourlecturemusthavedonehergood。Herpresentattitudeisthatofgentleforbearancetoallaroundher——notwithoutitsdignity。Shehasnotsnortedonce，andattimesisreallyhelpful。Ihavegivenheranemptyscribblingdiarywefoundinyourdesk，andmostofhersparetimesheremainsshutupwithitinthebedroom。Shetellsmeyouandshearewritingabooktogether。Iaskedherwhatabout。ShewavedmeasidewiththeassurancethatIwouldknow’allingoodtime，’andthatitwasgoingtodogood。Icaughtsightofjustthetitle—pagelastnight。

Itwaslyingopenonthedressing—table：’WhytheManintheMoonlookssatupon。’Itsoundslikeatitleofyours。ButIwouldnotlookfurther，thoughtempted。Shehasdrawnapictureunderneath。

Itisreallynotbad。Theoldgentlemanreallydoeslooksatupon，andintenselydisgusted。

"’SirRobert’——hisnamebeingTheodore，whichdoesn’tseemtosuithim——turnsouttobetheonlysonofawidow，aMrs。Foy，ournext—

doorneighbourtothesouth。WemethercomingoutofchurchonSundaymorning。Shewasstillcrying。DicktookVeronicaonahead，andIwalkedpartofthewayhomewiththem。Hergrandfather，itappears，waskilledmanyyearsagobytheburstingofaboiler；andsheishaunted，poorlady，bytheconvictionthatTheodoreistheinheritorofanhereditarytendencytogettinghimselfblownup。Sheattachesnoblametous，seeinginSaturday’scatastropheonlythehandoftheFamilyCurse。ItriedtocomfortherwiththeideathattheCursehavingspentitselfuponafutileeffort，nothingfurtherneednowbefearedfromit；butshepersistsintakingthegloomierviewthatinwreckingourkitchen，Theodore’s’Doom，’asshecallsit，wasmerelyindulginginasortofdressrehearsal；thefinishingperformancemaybereliedupontofollow。Itsoundsridiculous，butthepoorwomanwassodesperatelyinearnestthatwhenanunluckyurchin，comingoutofacottagewewerepassing，trippedonthedoorstepandletfallajug，webothscreamedatthesametime，andwereequallysurprisedtofind’SirRobert’stillbetweenusandallinonepiece。Ithoughtitfoolishtodiscussallthisbeforethechildhimself；butdidnotliketostopher。Asaresult，heregardshimselfevidentlyasthechosenfoeofHeaven，andisnot，unnaturally，proudofhimself。Shecalledherethis（Monday）

afternoontoleavecards；and，atherrequest，Ishowedherthekitchenandthematoverwhichhehadstumbled。Sheseemedsurprisedthatthe’Doom’hadletslipsofavourableachanceofaccomplishingitsbusiness，andgatheredfromthefactaddedcauseforanxiety。

EvidentlysomethingmuchmorethoroughisinstoreforMasterTheodore。Itwasonlyhalfapoundofgunpowder，shetoldme。

DoctorSmallboy’sgardenerhadboughtitforthepurposeofraisingthestumpofanoldelm—tree，andhadleftitforamomentonthegrasswhilehehadreturnedtothehouseformorebrownpaper。Sheseemedpleasedwiththegardener，who，asshesaid，might，ifdishonestlyinclined，havechargedherforapound。Iwantedtopayfor——atallevents——ourshare，butshewouldnottakeapenny。Herlatelamentedgrandfathersheregardsasthepersonresponsiblefortheentireincident，andperhapsitmaybeaswellnottodisturbherview。HadIsuggestedit，Ifeelsureshewouldhaveseenthejusticeofherprovidinguswithanewkitchenrange。

"Wildlyexaggeratedaccountsoftheaffairareflyingroundtheneighbourhood；andmychieffearisthatVeronicamaydiscoversheisalocalcelebrity。Yoursuddendisappearanceissupposedtohavebeenheavenward。Anoldfarmlabourerwhosawyoupassonyourwaytothestationspeaksofyouas’theghostofthepoorgentlemanhimself；’andfragmentsofclothingfoundanywherewithinaradiusoftwomilesarebeingpreserved，Iamtold，asspecimensofyourremains。Bootswouldappeartohavebeenyourchiefapparel。Sevenpairshavealreadybeencollectedfromthesurroundingditches。

Amongthemorepublic—spiritedthereistalkofusingyoutostartalocalmuseum。"

ThesefirstthreeparagraphsIdidnotreadtoEthelbertha。

Fortunatelytheyjustfilledthefirstsheet，whichItookanopportunityofslippingintomypocketunobserved。

"ThenewboyarrivedonSundaymorning，"shecontinued。"Hisname——

ifIhavegotitright——isWilliam。Anyhow，thatisthenearestI

cangettoit。Hisothername，ifany，Imustleaveyoutoextractfromhimyourself。ItmaybeBerkshirethathetalks，butitsoundsmorelikebarking。Pleaseexcusethepun；butIhavejustbeentalkingtohimforhalfanhour，tryingtomakehimunderstandthatI

wanthimtogohome，andmaybe，asaresult，Iamfeelingalittlehysterical。AnythingmoreruralIcannotimagine。Butheisanxioustolearn，andafairlywidefieldisinfrontofhim。IcaughthimafterourbreakfastonSundaycalmlythrowingeverythingleftoverontothedust—heap。Ipointedouttohimthewickednessofwastingnourishingfood，andimpresseduponhimthattheproperplaceforvictualswasinsideus。Heneveranswers。Hestandsstockstill，withhismouthaswideopenasitwillgo——whichissayingagooddeal——andonetruststhatone’swordsareenteringintohim。AllSundayafternoonhewasstrugglingvaliantlyagainstanalmostsupernaturalsleepiness。Afterteahegotworse，andIbegantothinkhewouldbenousetome。Wenoneofusatemuchsupper；andDick，whoappearsabletounderstandhim，helpedhimtocarrythethingsout。Iheardthemtalking，andthenDickcamebackandclosedthedoorbehindhim。’Hewantstoknow，’saidDick，’ifhecanleavethecornedbeefovertilltomorrow。Because，ifheeatsitallto—

night，hedoesn’tthinkhewillbeabletowalkhome。’

"Veronicatakesgreatinterestinhim。Shehasevidentlyamotherlysidetohercharacter，forwhichwenoneofushavegivenhercredit。

Shesayssheissurethereisgoodinhim。Shesitsbesidehimwhilehechopswood，andtellshimcarefullyselectedstories，calculated，sheargues，todevelophisintelligence。Sheiscareful，moreover，nottohurthisfeelingsbyanydisplayofsuperiority。’Ofcourse，anyoneleadingausefullife，suchasyours，’Ioverheardhersayingtohimthismorning，’don’tnaturallygetmuchtimeforreading。

I’venothingelsetodo，yousee，’cepttoimprovemyself。’

"ThedonkeyarrivedthisafternoonwhileIwasout——galloping，Iamgiventounderstand，with’Opkinsonhisback。Thereseemstobesomesecretbetweenthosetwo。Wehavetriedhimwithhay，andwehavetriedhimwiththistles；butheseemstopreferbread—and—

butter。Ihavenotbeenableasyettofindoutwhetherhetakesteaorcoffeeinthemorning。Butheisananimalthatevidentlyknowshisownmind，andfortunatelybothareinthehouse。Weareputtinghimupforto—nightwiththecow，whogreetedhimatfirstwithenthusiasmandwantedtoadopthim，buthasgrowncoldtohimsinceondiscoveringthatheisnotacalf。Ihavebeentryingtomakefriendswithher，butsheissoveryunresponsive。Shedoesn’tseemtowantanythingbutgrass，andpreferstogetthatforherself。Shedoesn’tseemtowanttobehappyeveragain。

"Afunnythinghappenedinchurch。Iwasforgettingtotellyou。

TheSt。Leonardsoccupytwopewsattheoppositeendfromthedoor。

Theywerealltherewhenwearrived，withtheexceptionoftheoldgentlemanhimself。Hecameinjustbeforethe’DearlyBeloved，’wheneverybodywasstandingup。Arunningfireofsuppressedtittersfollowedhimuptheaisle，andsomeofthepeoplelaughedoutright。

Icouldseenoreasonwhy。Helookedadignifiedoldgentlemaninhisgreyhairandtightlybuttonedfrockcoat，whichgiveshimasomewhatmilitaryappearance。ButwhenhecamelevelwithourpewI

understood。Hurryingbackfromhismorninground，andwithnoonetheretosuperintendhim，thedearoldabsent—mindedthinghadforgottentochangehisbreeches。FromalittleabovethekneeupwardhewasaperfectChristian；buthislegswerejustthoseofadisreputablesinner。

"’What’sthejoke？’hewhisperedtomeashepassed——Iwasinthecornerseat。’HaveImissedit？’

"Wecalledroundonthemafterlunch，andatonceIwasappealedtoformydecision。

"’Now，here’saplainsensiblegirl，’exclaimedtheoldgentlemanthemomentIenteredtheroom。’（YouwillnoticeIputnocommaafter’plain。’Iamtakingithedidnotintendone。Youcanemployoneadjectivetoqualifyanother，can’tyou？）’AndIwillputittoher，WhatdifferencecanitmaketotheAlmightywhetherIgotochurchintrousersorinbreeches？’

"’Idonotsee，’retortedMrs。St。Leonardsomewhatcoldly，’thatMissRobinaisinanybetterpositionthanmyselftospeakwithauthorityontheviewsoftheAlmighty’——whichIfeltwastrue。’IfitmakesnodifferencetotheAlmighty，thenwhynot，formysake，trousers？’

"’Theessentialthing，’hepersisted，’isacontriteheart。’Hewasgettingverycross。

"’Itmayjustaswellbedressedrespectably，’washiswife’sopinion。Helefttheroom，slammingthedoor。

"IdolikeJaniethemoreandmoreIseeofher。Idohopeshewillletmegetrealchumswithher。Shedoesmesomuchgood。（IreadthatbittwiceovertoEthelbertha，pretendingIhadlosttheplace。）

Isupposeitishavingratherasillymotherandanunpracticalfatherthathasmadehersocapable。IfyouandLittleMotherhadbeenpropersortofparentsImighthavebeenquiteadecentsortofgirl。Butit’stoolatefindingfaultwithyounow。IsupposeI

mustputupwithyou。Sheworkssohard，andissounselfish。Butsheisnotlikesomegoodpeople，whomakeyoufeelitishopelessyourtryingtobegood。Shegetscrossandimpatient；andthenshelaughsatherself，andgetsrightagainthatway。PoorMrs。St。

Leonard！Icannothelpfeelingsorryforher。ShewouldhavebeensohappyasthewifeofareallyrespectableCityman，whowouldhavegoneoffeverymorningwithaflowerinhisbuttonholeandhavewornawhitewaistcoatonSundays。Idon’tbelievewhattheysay：thathusbandsandwivesshouldbetheoppositeofoneanother。Mr。St。

Leonardoughttohavemarriedabrainywoman，whowouldhavediscussedphilosophywithhim，andhavebeenjustashappydrinkingbeeroutofatea—cup：youknowthesortImean。IfeverImarryitwillbeashort—temperedmanwholovesmusicandisagooddancer；

andifIfindouttoolatethathe’scleverI’llrunawayfromhim。

"Dickhasnotyetcomehome——nearlyeighto’clock。Veronicaissupposedtobeinbed，butIcanhearthingsfalling。Poorboy！I

expecthe’llbetired；buttodayisanexception。ThreehundredsheephavehadtobebroughtallthewayfromIlsley，andmustbe’herded’——Ifancyitiscalled——beforeanybodycanthinkofsupper。

Isawtoitthathehadagooddinner。

"Andnowtocometobusiness。YoungButehasbeenhereallday，andhasonlyjustleft。HeiscomingdownagainonFriday——which，bytheway，don’tforgetisMrs。St。Leonard’s’AtHome’day。Shehopesshemaythenhavethepleasureofmakingyouracquaintance，andthinksthatpossiblytheremaybepresentoneortwopeoplewemayliketoknow。FromwhichIgatherthathalftheneighbourhoodhasbeenspeciallyinvitedtomeetyou。Somindyoubringafrock—coat；andifLittleMothercanputherhandeasilyonmypinkmuslinwiththespots——itiseitherinmywardrobeorelseinthebottomdrawerinVeronica’sroom，ifitisn’tinthecardboardboxunderneathmother’sbed——youmightslipitintoyourbag。Butwhateveryoudodon’tcrushit。ThesashIfeelsuremotherputawaysomewhereherself。

Heseesnoreason——I’mtalkingnowaboutyoungBute，——ifyouapprovehisplans，whyworkshouldnotbecommencedimmediately。ShallI

writeoldSleetomeetyouatthehouseonFriday？FromallaccountsIdon’tthinkyou’lldobetter。Heisonthespot，andtheysayheismostreasonable。Butyouhavetogetestimates，don’tyou？Hesuggests——Mr。Bute，Imean——throwingwhatusedtobethedairyintothepassage，whichwillmakeahallbigenoughforanything。Wemightevengiveadanceinit，hethinks。ButallthisyouwillbeabletodiscusswithhimonFriday。Hehasevidentlytakenagreatdealofpains，andsomeofhissuggestionssoundsensible。Butofcoursehemustfullyunderstandthatitiswhatwewant，notwhathethinks，thatisimportant。ItoldhimyousaidIcouldhavemyroomexactlyasIlikeditmyself；andIhaveexplainedtohimmyideas。

HeseemedatfirsttobeundertheimpressionthatIdidn’tknowwhatIwastalkingabout，soImadeitquitecleartohimthatIdid，withtheresultthathehasconsentedtocarryoutmyinstructions，onconditionthatIputthemdowninblackandwhite——whichIthinkjustaswell，asthentherecanbenoexcuseafterwardsforargument。I

likehimbetterthanIdidthefirsttime。Abouteverythingelsehecanbefairlyamiable。Itiswhenhetalksabout’frontalelevations’and’groundplans’thatheirritatesme。TellLittleMotherthatI’llwriteherto—morrow。Couldn’tshecomedownwithyouonFriday？Everythingwillbeship—shapebythen；and——"

Theremainderwasofanaturemoreprivate。Sheconcludedwithapostscript，whichalsoIdidnotreadtoEthelbertha。

"ThoughtIhadfinishedtellingyoueverything，whenquiteastylishrat—tatsoundedonthedoor。IplacedanoldstrawhatofDick’sinaprominentposition，calledloudlytoanimaginary’John’nottogowithouttheletters，andthenopenedit。Heturnedouttobethelocalreporter。Ineednothavebeenalarmed。Hewasmuchthemorenervousofthetwo，andwassofullofexcusesthathadInotcometohisrescueIbelievehewouldhavegoneawayforgettingwhathe’dcomefor。NothingsaveanoverwhelmingsenseofdutytothePublic（withacapitalP）couldhaveinducedhimtoinflicthimselfuponme。

CouldIgivehimafewdetailswhichwouldenablehimtosetrumourright？Iimmediatelysawvisionsofheadlines：’DomesticTragedy！’

’EminentAuthorblownupbyhisownDaughter！’’OnceHappyHomenowaMereWreck！’Itseemedtomeouronlyplanwastoenlistthisamiableyoungmanuponourside；IhopeIdidnotoverdoit。Myideawastoconveytheimpressionthatoneglanceathimhadconvincedmehewasthebestandnoblestofmankind；thatIfeltIcouldrelyuponhiswitandcouragetosaveusfromanotorietythat，sofarasIwasconcerned，wouldsaddenmywholelife；andthatifhedidsoeternalgratitudeandadmirationwouldbetheleastIcouldlayathisfeet。

IcanbenicewhenItry。Peoplehavesaidso。Wepartedwithonlyapressureofthehand，andIhopehewon’tgetintotrouble，butI

seeTheBerkshireCourierisgoingtobedeprivedofitsprey。Dickhasjustcomein。Hepromisestotalkwhenhehasfinishedeating。"

Dick’sletter，forwhichEthelberthaseemedtobestrangelyimpatient，reachedusonWednesdaymorning。

"Ifeveryouwanttofindout，Dad，whathardworkreallymeans，youtryfarming，"wroteDick；"andyetIbelieveyouwouldlikeit。

Hasn’tsomeoldJohnnysomewheredescribeditasthepoetryoftheploughshare？Whydidweevertaketobotheringaboutanythingelse——

shuttingourselvesupinstuffyoffices，worryingourselvestodeathaboutalotofrubbishthatisn’tanygoodtoanybody？IwishI

couldputitproperly，Dad；youwouldseejustwhatImean。Whydon’tweliveinsimply—builthousesandgetmosteverythingwewantoutoftheland：whichweeasilycould？Youtakeadozenpoordevilsawayfromwalkingbehindtheploughandputthemdownintocoal—mines，andsetthemrunningabouthalf—nakedamongalotofroaringfurnaces，andbetweenthemtheyturnoutamachinethatdoestheploughingforthem。Whatisthesenseofit？Ofcoursesomethingsareuseful。Iwouldlikeamotor—car，andrailwaysandsteamboatsareallright；butitseemstomethathalfthefiddle—

faddleswefancywewantwe’dbejustaswell，ifnotbetter，without，andtherewouldbeallthattimeandenergytospareforthesortofthingsthateverybodyoughttohave。It’severywherejustlikeitwasatschool。Theykeptussohardatit，studyingGreekroots，wehadn’ttimetolearnEnglishgrammar。LookatyoungDennisYewbury。He’sgottwothousandacresupinScotland。Hecouldleadajollylifeturningtheplaceintosomerealuse。Insteadofwhichheletsitallruntowastefornothingbuttobreedafewhundredbirdsthatwouldn’tkeepasinglefamilyalive；whileheworksfrommorningtillnightathumbuggingpeopleinabeastlyholeintheCity，justtofillhishousewithahostofsillygim—cracksanddressuphimselfandhiswomen—folklikepeacocks。Ofcoursewewouldalwayswantcleverchapslikeyoutotellusstories；anddoctorswecouldn’tdowithout，thoughIguessifwewereleadingsensibleliveswe’dbeabletogetalongwithabouthalfofthem。Itseemstomethatwhatwewantisacomfortablehome，enoughtoeatanddrink，andafewfal—lalsortofthingstomakethegirlslookpretty；andthatalltherestisrot。Wewouldallofushavetimethentothinkandplayabit，andifwewereallworkingfairlyatsomethingreallyusefulandwerecontentedwithourownshare，there’dbeenoughforeverybody。

"Isupposethisisallnonsense，butIwishitwasn’t。Anyway，it’swhatImeantodomyself；andI’mawfullymuchobligedtoyou，Dad，forgivingmethischance。You’vehittherightnailontheheadthistime。FarmingwaswhatIwasmeantfor；Ifeelit。Iwouldhavehatedbeingabarrister，settingpeoplebytheearsandmakingmylivingoutofotherpeople’stroubles。Beingafarmeryoufeelthatindoinggoodtoyourselfyouaredoinggoodallround。MissJanieagreeswithallIsay。IthinksheisoneofthemostsensiblegirlsIhaveevercomeacross，andRobinlikesherawfully。Soistheoldman：he’sabrick。Ithinkhehastakenalikingtome，andIknowIhavetohim。He’sthedearestoldfellowimaginable。Theveryturnipsheseemstothinkofasthoughtheyweresomanyrowsoflittlechildren。Andhemakesyouseetheinsideofthings。Takefieldsnow，forinstance。Iusedtothinkafieldwasjustafield。

Youscrapeditaboutandplanteditwithseeds，andeverythingelsedependedontheweather。Why，Dad，it’salive！Therearegoodfieldsthatwanttogeton——thataregratefulforeverythingyoudoforthem，andtakeaprideinthemselves。Andtherearebrutesoffieldsthatyoufeelyouwanttokick。Youcanwasteahundredpounds’worthofmanureonthem，anditonlymakesthemmorestupidthantheywerebefore。Oneofourfields——awizened—lookingeleven—

acrestripborderingtheFyfieldroad——hehaschristenedMrs。

Gummidge：itseemstofeeleverythingmorethananyotherfield。

Fromwhateverpointofthecompassthewindblowsthatfieldgetsthemostharmfromit。Youwouldthinktolookatitafterastormthattherehadn’tbeenanyraininanyotherfield——thatthat’particularfieldmusthavegotitall；whiletwodays’sunshinehastheeffectuponitthatasixweeks’droughtwouldonanyotherfield。Histheory（hemusthaveatheorytoaccountforeverything；itcomfortshim。Hehasjusthituponatheorythatexplainswhytwinsarebornwithtwiceasmuchoriginalsinasotherchildren，anddoesn’tseemtomindnowwhattheydo）isthateachoddcorneroftheearthhasgainedacharacterofitsownfromthespiritsofthecountlessdeadmenburiedinitsbosom。’Robbersandthieves，’hewillsay，kickingthesodofsomefieldallstonesandthistles；’sillyfightingmenwhothoughtGodbuilttheworldmerelytogivethemthefunofknockingitabout。Lookatthem，thefools！stonesandthistles——

thistlesandstones：thatistheirnotionofafield。’Or，leaningoverthegateofsomefieldofrich—smellingsoil，hewillstretchouthisarmsasthoughtocaressit：’Bravelads！’hewillsay；

’kindlyhonestfellowswholovedthepoorpeasantfolk。’Ifancyhehasnotgotmuchsenseofhumour；orifhehas，itisahumourheleavesyoutofindoutforyourself。Onedoesnotfeelonewantstolaugh，listeningeventohismostwhimsicalideas；andanyhowitisafactthatoftwofieldsquiteclosetooneanother，onewillbeworthtenpoundsanacreandtheotherdearathalfacrown，andthereseemstobenothingtoexplainit。Wehaveaseven—acrepatchjusthalfwayupthehill。Hesaysheneverpassesitwithouttakingoffhishattoit。Whateveryouputinitdoeswell；whileotherfields，trythemwithwhatyouwill，itisalwaystheverythingtheydidnotwant。Youmightfancythemfractiouschildren，alwayscryingfortheotherchild’sbun。Thereisreallynoreasonforitsbeingsuchagoodfield，exceptitsownpluck。Itfacestheeast，andthewoodforhalfthedayhidesitfromthesun；butitmakesthebestofeverything，andevenonthegreyestdayitseemstobesmilingatyou。’Somehappy—heartedMotherThing——asingeroflovesongsthewhileshetoiled，’hewillhaveit，mustliesleepingthere。By—the—

bye，whatajollyfieldJaniewouldmake！Don’tyouthinkso，Dad？

"Whatthedickens，Dad，haveyoudonetoVeronica？Shewandersabouteverywherewithanexercisebookinherhand，andwhenyousayanythingtoher，insteadofansweringyouback，shesitsplumpdownwhereversheisandwritesforallshe’sworth。Shewon’tsaywhatshe’supto。Shesaysit’saprivatematterbetweenyouandher，andthatlateronthingsaregoingtobeseenintheirtruelight。I

toldherthismorningwhatIthoughtofherforforgettingtofeedthedonkey。Iwasprepared，ofcourse，forahundredexplanations：

First，thatshehadmeanttofeedthedonkey；secondly，thatitwasn’therplacetofeedthedonkey；thirdly，thatthedonkeywouldhavebeenfedifcircumstancesoverwhichshehadnocontrolhadnotarisenrenderingitimpossibleforhertofeedthedonkey；fourthly，thatthemorningwasn’tthepropertimetofeedthedonkey，andsoon。Insteadofwhich，outshewhipsthisridiculousbookandasksmeifIwouldmindsayingitoveragain。

"IkeepforgettingtoaskJaniewhatitishehasbeenaccustomedto。

Wehavetriedhimwiththistles，andwe’vetriedhimwithhay。Thethistleshescratcheshimselfagainst；butforthehayheappearstohavenousewhatever。Robinthinkshisideaistosaveustrouble。

Wearenottogetinanythingespeciallyforhim——whateverwemayhappentobehavingourselveshewillputupwith。Bread—and—buttercutthick，orasliceofcakewithanappleseemstobehisnotionofalightlunch；andfordrinkhefanciesteaoutofaslop—basin，withtwoknobsofsugarandplentyofmilk。Robinsaysit’swasteoftimetakinghismealsouttohim。Shesayssheisgoingtotrainhimtocomeinwhenhehearsthegong。Weusethealarmclockatpresentforagong。Idon’tknowwhatIshalldowhenthecowgoesaway。

Shewakesmeeverymorningpunctuallyathalf—pastfour，butI’minabluefunkthatoneofthesedaysshewilloversleepherself。Itisoneofthoseclocksyoureadabout。Youwrotesomethingratherfunnyaboutoneonceyourself，butIalwaysthoughtyouhadinventedit。I

boughtitbecausetheysaiditwasanextraloudone，andsoitis。

Thethingthat’swrongaboutitisthat，dowhatyouwill，youcan’tgetittogooffbeforesixo’clockinthemorning。IsetitonSundayeveningforhalf—pastfour——wefarmersdohavetowork，Icantellyou。Butit’sworthit。Ihadnoideathattheworldwassobeautiful。Thereisalightyouneverseeatanyothertime，andthewholeairseemstobefullofflutteringsong。Youfeel——butyoumustgetupandcomeoutwithme，Dad。Ican’tdescribeit。Ifithadn’tbeenforthegoodoldcow，LordknowswhattimeI’dhavebeenup。Theclockwentoffathalf—pastfourintheafternoon，justastheyweresittingdowntotea，andfrightenedthemalloutoftheirskins。Wehavefiddledaboutwithitallweknow，butthere’snogettingittodoanythingbetweensixp。m。andsixam。Anythingyouwantofitinthedaytimeitisquiteagreeableto。Butitseemstohavefixeditsownworkinghours，andisn’tgoingtobebustledoutofitsproperrest。IgotsomadwithitmyselfIwantedtopitchitoutofthewindow，butRobinthoughtweoughttokeepittillyoucame，thatperhapsyoumightbeabletodosomethingwithit——writingsomethingaboutit，shemeans。IsaidIthoughtalarmclockswereprettywellplayedoutbythistime；but，asshesays，thereisalwaysanewgenerationcomingalongtowhomalmosteverythingmustbefresh。Anyhow，theconfoundedthingcostsevenandsix，andseemstobenogoodforanythingelse。

"WhateverwasitthatyoureallydidsaytoRobinaboutherroom？

YoungButecameroundtomeonMondayquiteupsetaboutit。Hesaysitisgoingtobeallwindows，andwilllook，whenfinished，likeanincorrectcopyoftheEddystonelighthouse。Hesaystherewillbenoplaceforthebed，andifthereistobeafireplaceatallitwillhavetobeinthecupboard，andthattheonlyway，sofarashecansee，ofhergettinginandoutofitwillbebyadoorthroughthebathroom。Shesaidthatyousaidshecouldhaveitentirelytoherownidea，andthathewasjusttocarryoutherinstructions；but，ashepointsout，youcan’thavearoominahouseasiftherestofthehousewasn’tthere，evenifitisyourownroom。Nobody，itseems，willbeabletohaveabathwithoutfirsttalkingitoverwithher，andarrangingatimemutuallyconvenient。ItoldhimIwassureyounevermeanthimtodoanythingabsurd；andthathisbestplanwouldbetogostraightbacktoher，explaintoherthatshe’dbeentalkinglikeasillygoat——hecouldhaveputitpolitely，ofcourse——andthathewasn’tgoingtopayanyattentiontoher。YoumighthavethoughtIhadsuggestedhiswalkingintoadenoflionsandpullingalltheirtails。Idon’tknowwhatRobinhasdonetohim，butheseemsquitefrightenedofher。IhadtopromisethatIwouldtalktoher。He’dbetterhavedoneithimself。Ionlytoldherjustwhathesaid，andoffshewentinoneofhertantrums。Youknowherstyle：Ifshelikedtoliveinaroomwhereshecouldseetodoherhairthatwasnobusinessofhis，andifhecouldn’tdesignaplain，simplebedroomthatwasn’tgoingtolookridiculousandmakeherthelaughing—stockofalltheneighbourhood，thentheRoyalInstituteofBritishArchitectsmusthavestrangenotionsofthesortofpersonentitledtogoaboutthecountrybuildinghouses；thatifhethoughttheproperplaceforafirewasinacupboard，shedidn’t；thathisdutywastocarryouttheinstructionsofhisemployers，andifheimaginedforamomentshewasgoingtoconsenttoremainshutupinherroomtilleverybodyinthehousehadfinishedbathingitwouldbebetterforustosecuretheservicesofsomebodypossessedofalittlecommonsense；thatnexttimeshemethimshewouldcertainlytellhimwhatshethoughtofhim，alsothatsheshouldcertainlydeclinetoholdanyfurthercommunicationwithhimagain；thatshedoesn’twantabedroomnowofanysort——perhapsshemaybepermittedashakedowninthepantry，orperhapsVeronicawillallowheranoccasionalnight’srestwithher，andifnotitdoesn’tmatter。

You’llhavetotalktoheryourself。I’mnotgoingtosayanymore。

"Don’tforgetthatFridayistheSt。Leonards’’AtHome’day。I’vepromisedJaniethatyoushallbethereinallyourbestclothes。

（Don’ttellherI’mcallingherJanie。Itmightoffendher。ButnobodycallsherMissSt。Leonard。）Everybodyiscoming，andallthechildrenarehavingtheirhairwashed。Youwillhaveitallyourownwaydownhere。There’snoothercelebritytillyougettoBossCroker，theTammanyman，theothersideofIlsleyDowns。Artiststheydon’tcount。Therumourwasallroundtheplacelastweekthatyouwerehereincognitointhepersonofadismal—lookingJohnny，stayingatthe’Fisherman’sRetreat，’whousedtositalldayinapuntupthebackwaterdrinkingwhisky。ItmademerathermadwhenI

sawhim。Isupposeitwasthewhiskythatsuggestedtheideatothem。Theyhavegotthenotioninthesepartsthataliterarymanisasortofinspiredtramp。AMrs。Jaggerswade——orsomesuchname——

whomImethereonSundayandwhoiscomingonFriday，tookmeasideandaskedme’whatsortofthings’yousaidwhenyoutalked？Shesaidshefeltsureitwouldbesoclever，and，herself，shewaslookingforwardtoit；butwouldI——’quitebetweenourselves’——advisehertobringthechildren。

"Isay，youwillhavetotalkseriouslytoVeronica。Countrylifeseemstoagreewithher。She’stakentopoachingalready——sheandthetwins。Itwastheonesinthathithertotheyhadnevercommitted，andIfancytheoldmanwasfeelingproudofthis。

LuckilyIcaughtthemcominghome——withtendeadrabbitsstrungonapole，thetwinscarryingitbetweenthemontheirshoulders，suggestingthepictureofthespiesreturningfromthepromisedlandwiththatbunchofgrapes——Veronicascoutingonaheadwith，everytenyards，hereartotheground，listeningforhostilefootsteps。Thethingthattroubledhermostwasthatshehadn’theardmecoming；sheseemedtofearthatsomethinghadgonewrongwiththelawsofNature。

Theyhadfoundthewholecollectionhangingfromatree，andhadpersuadedthemselvesthatProvidencemusthavebeenexpectingthem。

Iinsistedontheirgoingbackwithmeandshowingmethetree，muchtotheirdisgust。Andfortunatelythekeeperwasn’tabout——theyarementhatlovemakingarow。Italkedsomefinemoralsentimenttoher。Butshesaysyouhavetoldherthatitdoesn’tmatterwhetheryouaregoodorbad，thingshappentoyoujustthesame；andthisbeingsoshefeelsshemayaswellenjoyherself。Iaskedherwhysheneverseemedabletoenjoyherselfbeinggood——IbelieveifI’dalwayshadakidtobringupI’dhavebeenamodelchapmyselfbythistime。Heranswerwasthatshesupposedshewasbornbad。I

pointedouttoherthatwasareflectiononyouandLittleMother；

andsheansweredsheguessedshemustbea’throw—back。’OldSlee’sgotadogthatoughttohavebeenafox—terrier，butisn’t，andheseemstohavebeenexplainingthingstoher。

"Athingthatwilltroubleyoudownhere，Dad，isthecrueltyofthecountry。Theycatchthesepoorlittlewretchesintraps，leavingthemsometimesfordayssufferingwhatmustbetothemnothingshortofagony——tosaynothingoftheterrorandthehunger。Itriedputtingmyfingerinoneofthebeastlythingsandkeepingitthereforjusttwominutesbymywatch。Itseemedliketwenty。Thepaingrowsmoreintensewitheverysecond，andI’mnotasoft，asyouknow。I’velainhalfanhourwithabrokenleg，andthatwasn’tasbad。Onehearsthelittlecreaturesscreaming，butcannotfindthem。

Ofcoursewhenonedrawsneartheykeepsilent。Itmakesonequitedislikecountrypeople。Theyaresocallous。Whenyouspeaktothemaboutittheyonlygrin。Janiegoesnearlymadaboutit。Mr。St。

Leonardtriedtogettheclergymantosaysomethingonthesubject，butheansweredthathethoughtitbetter’fortheChurchtoconfineherselftotheaccomplishmentofherowngreatmission。’Ass！

"BringLittleMotherdown；wewanttoshowheroffonFriday。Andmakeherputonsomethingpretty。Askherifshe’sgotthatlilacthingwithlacesheworeatCambridgefortheMayWeektheyearbeforelast。Tellhernottobesilly；itwasn’tabittooyoung。

Nashsaidshelookedlikesomethingoutofanoldpicture，andhe’sgoingtobeanartist。Don’tletherdressherself。Shedoesn’tunderstandit。Andwillyougetmeagun——"

Theremainderoftheletterwastakenupwithinstructionsconcerningthegun。Itseemedacomplicatedsortofgun。IwishedIhadn’treadabouttheguntoEthelbertha。Itmadehernervousfortherestoftheday。

Veronica’sletterfollowedonThursdaymorning。Ireaditgoingdowninthetrain。IntranscribingIhavethoughtitbetter，asregardsthespelling，toadoptthemoreconventionalforms。

"Youwillbepleasedtohear，"Veronicawrote，"thatweareallquitewell。Robinworksveryhard。ButIthinkitdoeshergood。AndofcourseIhelpher。AllIcan。Iamgladshehasgotaboy。Todothewashing—up。Ithinkthatwastoomuchforher。Itusedtomakehercross。Onecannotblameher。Itistryingwork。Anditmakesyoumucky。Heisagoodboy。Buthasbeenneglected。Sodoesn’tknowmuch。Iamteachinghimgrammar。Hesays’youwas’and’herbe。’Butisgettingbetter。Hesayshewenttoschool。Buttheycouldn’thavetakenanytroublewithhim。Couldthey？Thesystem，I

suppose，wasrotten。RobinasaysImustn’toverdoit。BecauseyouwanthimtotalkBerkshire。SoIproposeconfiningourattentiontotheelementaryrules。HehadneverheardofRobinsonCrusoe。Whatalife！WewenttochurchonSunday。Icouldnotfindmygloves。AndRobinawaswaxy。ButMr。St。Leonardcamewithouthistrousers。

Whichwasworse。Wefoundthemintheevening。Thelittleboythatblewupourstovewastherewithhismother。ButIdidn’tspeaktoher。He’sgotadoom。That’swhatmadehimblowitup。Hecouldn’thelpit。Soyouseeitwasn’tmyfault。Afterall。Hisgrandfatherwasblownup。Andhe’sgoingtobeblownupagain。Lateron。Butheisverybrave。Andisgoingtomakeawill。IlikealltheSt。

Leonardsverymuch。WewenttheretoteaonSunday。AndMr。St。

LeonardsaidIwasbright。IthinkMissJanieverybeautiful。AndsodoesDick。Shemakesmethinkofangels。SoshedoesDick。Andhesayssheissokindtoherlittlebrothersandsisters。Itisagoodsign。IthinksheoughttomarryDick。Itwouldsteadyhim。

Heworksveryhard。ButIthinkitdoeshimgood。Wehavebreakfastatseven。AndIlaythetable。Itisverybeautifulinthemorning。

Whenyouareonceup。Mrs。St。Leonardhastwins。Theyareagreatanxietytoher。Butshewouldnotpartfromthem。Shehashadmuchtrouble。Andissometimesverysad。Ilikethegirlbest。HernameisWinnie。Sheismorelikeaboy。HisnameisWilfrid。Butsometimestheychangeclothes。Thenyou’redone。Theyareonlynearlyseven。Buttheyknowalot。Theyaregoingtoteachmeswimming。Isitnotkindofthem？Thetwoolderboysareathomefortheirholidays。Buttheygivethemselvesalotofairs。Andtheycalledmeaflapper。Itoldhimhe’dbesorry。Whenhewasaman。BecauseperhapsI’dgrowupbeautiful。Andthenhe’dfallinlovewithme。Buthesaidhewouldn’t。SoIlethimseewhatI

thoughtofhim。Thelittlegirlisverynice。Sheisaboutmyownage。HernameisSally。Wearegoingtowriteaplay。Butwesha’n’tletBertieactinit。Unlessheturnsoveranewleaf。I’mgoingtobeaprincessthatdoesn’tknowit。Butonlyfeelsit。Andshe’sgoingtobeawickedwitch。Whatwantsmetomarryherson。

What’sasight。ButIwon’t，becauseI’dratherdiefirst。Andaminlovewithaswineherd。Thatisagenius。Onlynobodysuspectsit。Iwearacrowninthelastact。Andeverybodyrejoices。Excepther。Ithinkitwillbegood。Wehavenearlyfinishedthefirstact。Shewritesverywell。Andhasasenseofatmosphere。AndI

tellherwhattosay。MissJanieisgoingtomakemeadresswithatrain。Andgoldspangles。AndRobinaisgoingtolendmeherbluenecklace。Anythingwilldoofcoursefortheoldwitch。Soitwon’tbemuchtroubletoanyone。Mr。Buteisgoingtopaintussomescenery。Andwearegoingtoinviteeverybody。Heisverynice。

Robinasayshethinkstoomuchofhimself。Byalongchalk。Butsheisverycriticalwheremenareconcerned。Sheadmitsit。Shesaysshecan’thelpit。Ifindhimveryaffable。AndsodoesDick。WethinkRobinawillgetoverit。Andhehaspromisednottobeangrywithher。BecauseIhavetoldhimthatshedoesnotmeanit。Itisonlyherway。Shesaysshefeelsitisunjustofher。Becausereallyheisrathercharming。Itoldhimthat。AndhesaidIwasadearlittlegirl。Heisgoingtogetmearealcrown。Robinasayshehasniceeyes。Itoldhimthat。Andhelaughed。ThereisagentlemancomesherethatIthinkisinlovewithRobina。ButI

shouldn’tsayanythingtoheraboutit。IfIwasyou。Sheisverysnappyaboutit。Heisnothandsome。Buthelooksgood。Hewritesforthepapers。ButIdon’tthinkheisrich。AndRobinaisverynicetohim。Untilhe’sgone。Thenshegetsmad。Itallbeganwiththeexplosion。Soperhapsitwasfate。Heisgoingtokeepitoutofthepapers。Asmuchashecan。Butofcourseheowesadutytothepublic。Iamgoingtodeclinetoseehim。Ithinkitbetter。

Mr。Sleesayseverythingwillbeinapple—pieorderto—morrow。Soyoucancomedown。AndwearegoingtohaveIrishstew。Androly—

polypudding。Itwillbeachange。Heisverynice。Andsayshewasalwaysintroublehimselfwhenhewasalittleboy。It’sallexperience。WeareallgoingonFridaytoapartyatMr。St。

Leonard’s。Andyouhavegottocometoo。RobinasaysIcanwearmynewfrock。Butwecan’tfindthesash。Itisverystrange。BecauseIrememberhavingseenit。Youdidn’ttakeitforanything，didyou？

Weshallhavetogetanewone，Isuppose。Itisveryannoying。Mynewshoeshavealsonotwornwell。Andtheyoughttohave。BecauseRobinasaystheywereexpensive。Thedonkeyhascome。Andheissweet。Heeatsoutofmyhand。Andletsmekisshim。Buthewon’tgo。Hegoesalittlewhenyoushoutathim。Veryloud。MeandRobinawentforadriveyesterdayaftertea。AndDickranbeside。

Andshouted。Buthegothoarse。Andthenhewouldn’tgonomore。

AndRobinadidnotlikeit。BecauseDickshoutedswearwords。Hesaystheycomenaturallytoyouwhenyoushout。AndRobinasaiditwashorrible。Andthatpeoplewouldhearhim。Sowegotout。Andpushedhimhome。Butheisverystrong。Andwewereallverytired。

AndRobinasaysshehateshim。DickisgoingtogiveMr。’Opkinshalfacrown。Totellhimhowhemakeshimgo。BecauseMr。’Opkinsmakeshimgallop。Robinasaysitmustbehypnotism。ButDickthinksitmightbesomethingsimpler。IthinkMr。’Opkinsverynice。Hesaysyoupromisedtolendhimabook。Whatwouldhelphimtotalklikearealcountryboy。SoIhavelenthimabookaboutawindow。

ByMr。Bane。Whatcametoseeuslastyear。Ithasalotoffunnywordsinit。Andheisgoingtolearnthemup。Buthedon’tknowwhattheymean。NomoredoI。Ihavewrittenalotofthebook。Itpromisestobeveryinteresting。Itisalladream。Heisjusttheordinarygrown—upfather。Neitherbetternorworse。Andhegoesupandup。Itisapleasantsensation。Tillhereachesthemoon。Andthereeverythingisdifferent。Itisthechildrenthatknoweverything。Andarealwaysright。Andthegrown—upshavetodoallwhattheytellthem。Theyarekindbutfirm。Itisverygoodforhim。Andwhenhewakesupheisabetterman。Iputdowneverythingthatoccurstome。Likeyousuggested。Thereisquitealotofit。

Anditmakesyouseehowunjustlychildrenaretreated。TheysaidI

wastofeedthedonkey。Becauseitwasmydonkey。AndIfedhim。

Andtherewasn’tenoughsupperforDick。AndDicksaidIwasanidiot。AndRobinasaidIwasn’ttofeedhim。Andinthemorningtherewasn’tanythingtofeedhimon。Becausehewon’teatanythingbutbread—and—butter。Andthebakerhadn’tcome。Andhewasn’tthere。Becausethemanthatcomestomilkthecowhadleftthedooropen。AndIwasdistracted。AndDickaskedhadIfedhim。AndofcourseIhadn’tfedhim。AndlordhowDicktalked。Neverwaitedtohearanything，mindyou。Ilethimtalk。Butitjustshowsyou。Weareallveryhappy。Butshallbepleasedtoseeyou。Onceagain。

Thepeppermintcreamsdownherearenotgood。Andareverydear。

ComparedwithLondonprices。Isn’tthisagoodletter？YousaidI

wastoalwayswritejustasIthought。SoI’mdoingit。Ithinkthat’sall。"

IreadselectionsfromthisletteraloudtoEthelbertha。Shesaidshewasgladshehaddecidedtocomedownwithme。

CHAPTERIX

Hadallthingsgoneasordered，ourarrivalattheSt。Leonards’onFridayafternoonwouldhavebeenimposing。Itwasourentrance，sotospeak，uponthelocalstage；andRobinahaddecideditwasacasewheresmalleconomiesoughtnottobeconsidered。Theliverystableproprietorhadsuggestedabrougham，butthatwouldhavenecessitatedoneofusridingoutside。IexplainedtoRobinathat，inthecountry，thiswasusual；andRobinahadrepliedthatmuchdependeduponfirstimpressions。Dickwould，inallprobability，claimtheplaceforhimself；and，themomentwewerestarted，stickapipeinhismouth。Sheselectedanopenlandauofquiteanextraordinarysize，paintedyellow。ItlookedtomeanobjectmoreappropriatetoaLordMayor’sshowthantotherequirementsofaChristianfamily；

butRobinaseemedtouchyonthesubject，andIsaidnomore。Itcertainlywasroomy。OldGlossophadturneditoutwell，withapairofgreys——seventeenhands，Ijudgedthem。Theonlythingthatseemedwrongwasthecoachman。Ican’texplainwhy，buthestruckmeastheclassofyouthoneassociateswithamilk—cart。

Wesetoutatagentletrot。Veronica，whohadbeenintroublemostofthemorning，satstifflyontheextremeedgeofherseat，clothedintheattitudeofonedeadtotheworld；Dick，inlavenderglovesthatRobinahadthoughtfullyboughtforhim，nexttoher。

Ethelbertha，Robina，andmyselfsatperchedonthebackseat；tohaveleanedbackwouldhavebeentoliedown。Ethelbertha，havingmadeuphermindshewasgoingtodislikethewholefamilyoftheSt。

Leonards，seemeddisinclinedforconversation。MyselfIhadforgottenmycigar—case。IhavetriedtheSt。Leonardcigar。Hedoesnotsmokehimself；butkeepsaboxforhisfriends。Hetellsmehefanciesmenaresmokingcigarslessthanformerly。IdidnotseehowIwasgoingtogetasmokeforthenextthreehours。Nothingannoysmemorethanbeingbustledandmadetoforgetthings。Robina，whohasrecentlychangedherviewsonthesubjectoffreckles，sharedaparasolwithhermother。Theyhadtoholditalmosthorizontallyinfrontofthem，andthisobscuredtheirview。Icouldnotmyselfunderstandwhypeoplesmiledaswewentby。Apartfromthecarriage，whichtheymusthaveseenbefore，wewerenot，Ishouldhavesaid，anexhilaratingspectacle。Apartyofcyclistslaughedoutright。

Robinasaidtherewasonethingweshouldhavetobecarefulabout，livinginthecountry，andthatwasthatthestrongairandthelonelinesscombineddidn’tsapourintellect。Shesaidshehadnoticedit——thetendencyofcountrypeopletobecomeprematurelysilly。Ididnotshareherfears，asIhadbythistimedivinedwhatitwasthatwasamusingfolks。Dickhaddiscoveredbehindthecushions——remnantofsomerecentwedding，onesupposes——alargeandtastefullyboundBookofCommonPrayer。HeandVeronicasatholdingitbetweenthem。Lookingattheirfacesonecouldalmostheartheorganpealing。

Dickkeptoneeyeontheparasol；andwhen，onpassingintoshade，itwaslowered，heandVeronicawerewatchingwithraptecstasytheflightofswallows。RobinasaidsheshouldtellMr。Glossopoftheinsultstowhichrespectablepeopleweresubjectwhenridinginhiscarriage。Shethoughtheoughttotakestepstopreventit。Shelikewisesuggestedthatthefourofus，leavingtheLittleMotherinthecarriage，shouldwalkupthehill。Ethelberthasaidthatsheherselfwouldlikeawalk。Shehadbeenbalancingherselfontheedgeofacushionwithherfeetdanglingfortwomiles，andwastired。Sheherselfwouldhavepreferredacarriagemadeforordinary—sizedpeople。Ourcoachmancalledattentiontotheheatoftheafternoonandthelengthofthehill，andrecommendedourremainingwherewewere；buthisadvicewasdismissedasexhibitingwantoffeeling。Robinais，perhaps，atrifleover—sympatheticwhereanimalsareconcerned。Iremember，whentheywerechildren，herbangingDickovertheheadwiththenurserybellowsbecausehewouldnotagreetotalkinawhisperforfearofwakingthecat。Youcan，ofcourse，overdokindnesstoanimals，butitisafaultontherightside；and，asarule，Idonotdiscourageher。Veronicawasallowedtoremain，owingtoherbadknee。Itisamostunfortunateaffliction。Itcomesonquitesuddenly。Thereisnothingtobeseen；butthechild’sfacewhilesheissufferingfromitwouldmoveaheartofstone。Ithadbeentroublingher，soitappeared，allthemorning；butshehadsaidnothing，notwishingtoalarmhermother。

Ethelbertha，whothinksitmaybehereditary——sheherselfhavinghadanauntwhohadsufferedfromcontractedligament——fixedherupascomfortablyasthepainwouldpermitwithcushionsinthecentreofthebackseat；andtherestofustoiledafterthecarriage。

Ishouldnotliketosayforcertainthathorseshaveasenseofhumour，butIsometimesthinktheymust。Ihadahorseyearsagowhousedtotakedelightinteasinggirls。Icandescribeitnootherway。Hewouldpickoutagirlaquarterofamileoff；alwayssomehaughty，well—dressedgirlwhowasfeelingpleasedwithherself。Asweapproachedhewouldeyeherwithhorrorandastonishment。Itwastoomarkedtoescapenotice。Ahundredyardsoffhewouldbewalkingsideways，backingawayfromher；Iwouldseethepoorladygrowingscarletwiththeinsultandannoyanceofit。Oppositetoher，hewouldshytheentirewidthoftheroad，andmakepretencetobolt。

LookingbackIwouldseehervainlyappealingtosurroundingnatureforalooking—glasstoseewhatitwasthathadgonewrongwithher。

"Whatisthematterwithme，"shewouldbecryingtoherself；"thattheverybeastsofthefieldshouldshunme？Dotheytakemeforagollywog？"

Halfwayupthehill，theoff—sidegreyturnedhisheadandlookedatus。Wewereaboutacoupleofhundredyardsbehind；itwasahotanddustyday。Hewhisperedtothenear—sidegrey，andthenear—sidegreyturnedandlookedatusalso。Iknewwhatwascoming。I’vebeenplayedthesametrickbefore。Ishoutedtotheboy，butitwastoolate。Theytooktherestofthehillatagallopanddisappearedoverthebrow。Hadtherebeenanexperiencedcoachmanbehindthem，I

shouldnothaveworried。Dicktoldhismothernottobealarmed，andstartedoffatfifteenmilesanhour。IcalculatedIwasdoingaboutten，whichforagentlemanpasthisfirstyouth，inafrocksuitdesignedtodisguiseratherthangiveplaytothefigure，Iconsidercreditable。Robina，undecidedwhethertogoonaheadwithDickorremaintoassisthermother，wastedvigourbyrunningfromonetotheother。Ethelbertha’sonehopewasthatshemightreachthewreckageintimetoreceiveVeronica’slastwishes。