第6章

Lifeisnotagameofchess，thevictorytothemostknowing；itisagameofcards，one’shandbyskilltobemadethebestof。Isitthewisestwhoisalwaysthemostsuccessful？Ithinknot。Theluckiestwhist-playerIevercameacrosswasamanwhowasneverQUITEcertainwhatweretrumps，andwhosemostfrequentobservationduringthegamewas"Ireallybegyourpardon，"addressedtohispartner；aremarkwhichgenerallyelicitedthereply，"Oh，don’tapologize。All’swellthatendswell。"ThemanIknewwhomadethemostrapidfortunewasabuilderintheoutskirtsofBirmingham，whocouldnotwritehisname，andwho，forthirtyyearsofhislife，neverwenttobedsober。Idonotsaythatforgetfulnessoftrumpsshouldbecultivatedbywhist-players。Ithinkmybuilderfriendmighthavebeenevenmoresuccessfulhadhelearnedtowritehisname，andhadheoccasionally——notoverdoingit——enjoyedasoberevening。AllIwishtoimpressis，thatvirtueisnottheroadtosuccess——ofthekindwearedealingwith。Wemustfindotherreasonsforbeingvirtuous；maybe，therearesome。Thetruthis，lifeisagamblepureandsimple，andtheruleswelaydownforsuccessareakintotheinfalliblesystemswithwhichacertainclassofidiotgoesarmedeachseasontoMonteCarlo。Wecanplaythegamewithcoolnessandjudgment，decidewhentoplungeandwhentostakesmall；buttothinkthatwisdomwilldecideit，istoimaginethatwehavediscoveredthelawofchance。Letusplaythegameoflifeassportsmen，pocketingourwinningswithasmile，leavingourlosingswithashrug。Perhapsthatiswhywehavebeensummonedtotheboardandthecardsdealtround：thatwemaylearnsomeofthevirtuesofthegoodgambler；hisself-control，hiscourageundermisfortune，hismodestyunderthestrainofsuccess，hisfirmness，hisalertness，hisgeneralindifferencetofate。Goodlessonsthese，allofthem。Ifbythegamewelearnsomeofthemourtimeonthegreenearthhasnotbeenwasted。Ifwerisefromthetablehavinglearnedonlyfretfulnessandself-pityIfearithasbeen。

ThegrimHallPortertapsatthedoor："NumberFivehundredbillionandtwenty-eight，yourboatmaniswaiting，sir。"

So！isittimealready？Wepickupourcounters。Ofwhatusearethey？Inthecountrytheothersideoftherivertheyarenotender。Theblood-redforgold，andthepale-greenforlove，towhomshallweflingthem？Hereissomepoorbeggarlongingtoplay，letusgivethemtohimaswepassout。Poordevil！thegamewillamusehim——forawhile。

Keepyourpowderdry，andtrustinProvidence，isthemottoofthewise。Wetpowdercouldneverbeofanypossibleusetoyou。Dry，itmaybe，WITHthehelpofProvidence。WewillcallitProvidence，itisaprettiernamethanChance——perhapsalsoatruer。

Anothermistakewemakewhenwereasonoutourlivesisthis：wereasonasthoughwewereplanningforreasonablecreatures。Itisabigmistake。Well-meaningladiesandgentlemenmakeitwhentheypicturetheiridealworlds。Whenmarriageisreformed，andthesocialproblemsolved，whenpovertyandwarhavebeenabolishedbyacclamation，andsinandsorrowrescindedbyanoverwhelmingparliamentarymajority！Ah，thentheworldwillbeworthyofourlivinginit。Youneednotwait，ladiesandgentlemen，solongasyouthinkforthattime。Nosocialrevolutionisneeded，nosloweducationofthepeopleisnecessary。Itwouldallcomeaboutto-morrow，IFONLYWEWEREREASONABLECREATURES。

Imagineaworldofreasonablebeings！TheTenCommandmentswouldbeunnecessary：noreasoningbeingsins，noreasoningcreaturemakesmistakes。Therewouldbenorichmen，forwhatreasonablemancaresforluxuryandostentation？Therewouldbenopoor：thatIshouldeatenoughfortwowhilemybrotherinthenextstreet，asgoodamanasI，starves，isnotreasonable。Therewouldbenodifferenceofopiniononanytwopoints：thereisonlyonereason。You，dearReader，wouldfind，thatonallsubjectsyouwereofthesameopinionasI。Nonovelswouldbewritten，noplaysperformed；thelivesofreasonablecreaturesdonotafforddrama。Nomadloves，nomadlaughter，noscaldingtears，nofierceunreasoning，brief-livedjoys，nosorrows，nowilddreams——onlyreason，reasoneverywhere。

Butforthepresentweremainunreasonable。IfIeatthismayonnaise，drinkthischampagne，Ishallsufferinmyliver。Then，whydoIeatit？Juliaisacharminggirl，amiable，wise，andwitty；alsoshehasashareinabrewery。Then，whydoesJohnmarryAnn？whoisshort-tempered，tosaytheleastofit，who，hefeels，willnotmakehimsogoodahouse-wife，whohasextravagantnotions，whohasnolittlefortune。ThereissomethingaboutAnn’schinthatfascinateshim——hecouldnotexplaintoyouwhat。Onthewhole，Juliaisthebetter-lookingofthetwo。ButthemorehethinksofJulia，themoreheisdrawntowardsAnn。SoTommarriesJuliaandthebreweryfails，andJulia，onaholiday，contractsrheumaticfever，andisahelplessinvalidforlife；whileAnncomesinfortenthousandpoundslefttoherbyanAustralianunclenoonehadeverheardof，Ihavebeentoldofayoungman，whochosehiswifewithexcellentcare。Saidhetohimself，verywisely，"Intheselectionofawifeamancannotbetoocircumspect。"Heconvincedhimselfthatthegirlwaseverythingahelpmateshouldbe。Shehadeveryvirtuethatcouldbeexpectedinawoman，nofaults，butsuchasareinseparablefromawoman。Speakingpractically，shewasperfection。Hemarriedher，andfoundshewasallhehadthoughther。Onlyonethingcouldheurgeagainsther——thathedidnotlikeher。Andthat，ofcourse，wasnotherfault。

Howeasylifewouldbedidweknowourselves。Couldwealwaysbesurethattomorrowweshouldthinkaswedotoday。Wefallinloveduringasummerholiday；sheisfresh，delightful，altogethercharming；thebloodrushestoourheadeverytimewethinkofher。

Ouridealcareerisoneofperpetualserviceatherfeet。ItseemsimpossiblethatFatecouldbestowuponusanygreaterhappinessthantheprivilegeofcleaningherboots，andkissingthehemofhergarment——ifthehembealittlemuddythatwillpleaseusthemore。

Wetellherourambition，andatthatmomenteverywordweutterissincere。Butthesummerholidaypasses，andwithittheholidaymood，andwinterfindsuswonderinghowwearegoingtogetoutofthedifficultyintowhichwehavelandedourselves。Orworsestill，perhaps，themoodlastslongerthanisusual。Webecomeformallyengaged。Wemarry——Iwonderhowmanymarriagesaretheresultofapassionthatisburntoutbeforethealtar-railsarereached？——andthreemonthsafterwardsthelittlelassisbroken-heartedtofindthatweconsiderthelacingofherbootsabore。Herfeetseemtohavegrownbigger。Thereisnoexcuseforus，savethatwearesillychildren，neversureofwhatwearecryingfor，hurtingoneanotherinourplay，cryingveryloudlywhenhurtourselves。

IknewanAmericanladyoncewhousedtoboremewithlongaccountsofthebrutalitiesexerciseduponherbyherhusband。Shehadinstituteddivorceproceedingsagainsthim。Thetrialcameon，andshewashighlysuccessful。Weallcongratulatedher，andthenforsomemonthsshedroppedoutofmylife。Buttherecameadaywhenweagainfoundourselvestogether。Oneoftheproblemsofsociallifeistoknowwhattosaytooneanotherwhenwemeet；everymanandwoman’sdesireistoappearsympatheticandclever，andthismakesconversationdifficult，because，takingusallround，weareneithersympatheticnorclever——butthisbytheway。

Ofcourse，Ibegantotalktoheraboutherformerhusband。Iaskedherhowhewasgettingon。Sherepliedthatshethoughthewasverycomfortable。

"Marriedagain？"Isuggested。

"Yes，"sheanswered。

"Servehimright，"Iexclaimed，"andhiswifetoo。"Shewasapretty，bright-eyedlittlewoman，myAmericanfriend，andIwishedtoingratiatemyself。"Awomanwhowouldmarrysuchaman，knowingwhatshemusthaveknownofhim，issuretomakehimwretched，andwemaytrusthimtobeacursetoher。"

Myfriendseemedinclinedtodefendhim。

"Ithinkheisgreatlyimproved，"sheargued。

"Nonsense！"Ireturned，"amanneverimproves。Onceavillain，alwaysavillain。"

"Oh，hush！"shepleaded，"youmustn’tcallhimthat。"

"Whynot？"Ianswered。"Ihaveheardyoucallhimavillainyourself。"

"Itwaswrongofme，"shesaid，flushing。"I’mafraidhewasnottheonlyonetobeblamed；wewerebothfoolishinthosedays，butI

thinkwehavebothlearnedalesson。"

Iremainedsilent，waitingforthenecessaryexplanation。

"Youhadbettercomeandseehimforyourself，"sheadded，withalittlelaugh；"totellthetruth，Iamthewomanwhohasmarriedhim。Tuesdayismyday，Number2，K————Mansions，"andsheranoff，leavingmestaringafterher。

IbelieveanenterprisingclergymanwhowouldsetupalittlechurchintheStrand，justoutsidetheLawCourts，mightdoquiteatrade，re-marryingcoupleswhohadjustbeendivorced。Afriendofmine，arespondent，toldmehehadneverlovedhiswifemorethanontwooccasions——thefirstwhensherefusedhim，thesecondwhenshecameintothewitness-boxtogiveevidenceagainsthim。

"Youarecuriouscreatures，youmen，"remarkedaladyoncetoanothermaninmypresence。"Youneverseemtoknowyourownmind。"

Shewasfeelingannoyedwithmengenerally。Idonotblameher，I

feelannoyedwiththemmyselfsometimes。ThereisonemaninparticularIamalwaysfeelingintenselyirritatedagainst。Hesaysonething，andactsanother。Hewilltalklikeasaintandbehavelikeafool，knowswhatisrightanddoeswhatiswrong。Butwewillnotspeakfurtherofhim。Hewillbeallheshouldbeoneday，andthenwewillpackhimintoanice，comfortably-linedbox，andscrewtheliddowntightuponhim，andputhimawayinaquietlittlespotnearachurchIknowof，lestheshouldgetupandmisbehavehimselfagain。

Theotherman，whoisawisemanasmengo，lookedathisfaircriticwithasmile。

"Mydearmadam，"hereplied，"youareblamingthewrongperson。I

confessIdonotknowmymind，andwhatlittleIdoknowofitIdonotlike。Ididnotmakeit，Ididnotselectit。Iammoredissatisfiedwithitthanyoucanpossiblybe。Itisagreatermysterytomethanitistoyou，andIhavetolivewithit。Youshouldpitynotblameme。"

TherearemoodsinwhichIfalltoenvyingthoseoldhermitswhofrankly，andwithcourageouscowardice，shirkedtheproblemoflife。

TherearedayswhenIdreamofanexistenceunfetteredbythethousandpettystringswithwhichoursoulslieboundtoLilliputialand。IpicturemyselflivinginsomeNorwegiansater，highabovetheblackwatersofarockboundfiord。Nootherhumancreaturedisputeswithmemykingdom。Iamalonewiththewhisperingfirforestsandthestars。HowIliveIamnotquitesure。OnceamonthIcouldjourneydownintothevillagesandreturnladen。I

shouldnotneedmuch。Fortherest，mygunandfishing-rodwouldsupplyme。Iwouldhavewithmeacoupleofbigdogs，whowouldtalktomewiththeireyes，sofullofdumbthought，andtogetherwewouldwanderovertheuplands，seekingourdinner，aftertheoldprimitivefashionofthemenwhodreamtnotoften-coursedinnersandSavoysuppers。Iwouldcookthefoodmyself，andsitdowntothemealwithabottleofgoodwine，suchasstartsaman’sthoughts（forIaminconsistent，asIacknowledge，andthatgiftofcivilizationIwouldbearwithmeintomyhermitage）。Thenintheevening，withpipeinmouth，besidemylog-woodfire，Iwouldsitandthink，untilnewknowledgecametome。StrengthenedbythosesilentvoicesthataredrownedintheroarofStreetland，Imight，perhaps，growintosomethingnearertowhatitwasintendedthatamanshouldbe——mightcatchaglimpse，perhaps，ofthemeaningoflife。

No，no，mydearlady，intothislifeofrenunciationIwouldnottakeacompanion，certainlynotofthesexyouarethinkingof，evenwouldshecaretocome，whichIdoubt。Therearetimeswhenamanisbetterwithoutthewoman，whenawomanisbetterwithouttheman。

Lovedragsusfromthedepths，makesmenandwomenofus，butifwewouldclimbalittlenearertothestarswemustsaygood-byetoit。

Wemenandwomendonotshowourselvestoeachotheratourbest；

toooften，Ifear，atourworst。Thewoman’shighestidealofmanisthelover；toamanthewomanisalwaysthepossiblebeloved。Weseeeachother’shearts，butnoteachother’ssouls。Ineachother’spresencewenevershakeourselvesfreefromtheearth。

Match-makingmotherNatureisalwaysathandtopromptus。Awomanliftsusupintomanhood，butthereshewouldhaveusstay。"Climbuptome，"shecriestothelad，walkingwithsoiledfeetinmuddyways；"beatruemanthatyoumaybeworthytowalkbymyside；bebravetoprotectme，kindandtender，andtrue；butclimbnohigher，stayherebymyside。"Themartyr，theprophet，theleaderoftheworld’sforlornhopes，shewouldwakefromhisdream。Herarmsshewouldflingabouthisneckholdinghimdown。

Tothewomanthemansays，"Youaremywife。HereisyourAmerica，withinthesewalls，hereisyourwork，yourduty。"True，inninehundredandninety-ninecasesoutofeverythousand，butmenandwomenarenotmadeinmoulds，andtheworld’sworkisvarious。

Sometimestohersorrow，awoman’sworkliesbeyondthehome。ThedutyofMarywasnottoJoseph。

Theherointhepopularnovelistheyoungmanwhosays，"Iloveyoubetterthanmysoul。"Ourfavouriteheroineinfictionisthewomanwhocriestoherlover，"IwouldgodownintoHelltobewithyou。"

Therearemenandwomenwhocannotanswerthus——themenwhodreamdreams，thewomenwhoseevisions——impracticablepeoplefromtheBayswaterpointofview。ButBayswaterwouldnotbetheabodeofpeaceitishaditnotbeenforsuch。

Havewenotplacedsexualloveonapedestalhigherthanitdeserves？Itisanoblepassion，butitisnotthenoblest。Thereisawiderlovebythesideofwhichitisbutasthelampilluminingthecottage，tothemoonlightbathingthehillsandvalleys。Thereweretwowomenonce。ThisisaplayIsawactedinthedaylight。Theyhadbeenfriendsfromgirlhood，tilltherecamebetweenthemtheusualtrouble——aman。Aweak，prettycreaturenotworthathoughtfromeitherofthem；butwomenlovetheunworthy；

therewouldbenoover-populationproblemdidtheynot；andthispoorspecimen，ill-luckhadordainedtheyshouldcontendfor。

Theirrivalrybroughtoutallthatwasworstinbothofthem。Itisamistaketosupposeloveonlyelevates；itcandebase。Itwasameanstruggleforwhattoanonlookermusthaveappearedaremarkablyunsatisfyingprize。Thelosermightwellhavelefttheconquerortoherpoortriumph，evengrantingithadbeengainedunfairly。Buttheold，ugly，primevalpassionshadbeenstirredinthesewomen，andthewedding-bellsclosedonlythefirstact。

Thesecondisnotdifficulttoguess。ItwouldhaveendedintheDivorceCourthadnotthedesertedwifefeltthatafinerrevengewouldbesecuredtoherbysilence。

Inthethird，afteranintervalofonlyeighteenmonths，themandied——thefirstpieceofgoodfortunethatseemstohaveoccurredtohimpersonallythroughouttheplay。Hispositionmusthavebeenanexceedinglyanxiousonefromthebeginning。Notwithstandinghisflabbiness，onecannotbutregardhimwithacertainamountofpity——

notunmixedwithamusement。Mostoflife’sdramascanbeviewedaseitherfarceortragedyaccordingtothewhimofthespectator。Theactorsinvariablyplaythemastragedy；butthenthatistheessenceofgoodfarceacting。

Thuswassecuredthetriumphoflegalvirtueandthepunishmentofirregularity，andtheplaymightbedismissedasuninterestinglyorthodoxwereitnotforthefourthact，showinghowthewrongedwifecametothewomanshehadoncewrongedtoaskandgrantforgiveness。Strangelyasitmaysound，theyfoundtheirloveforoneanotherunchanged。Theyhadbeenlongparted：itwassweettoholdeachother’shandsagain。Twolonelywomen，theyagreedtolivetogether。Thosewhoknewthemwellinthislatertimesaythattheirlifewasverybeautiful，filledwithgraciousnessandnobility。

Idonotsaythatsuchastorycouldeverbecommon，butitismoreprobablethantheworldmightcredit。Sometimesthemanisbetterwithoutthewoman，thewomanwithouttheman。

ONTHENOBILITYOFOURSELVES

ANoldAnglicizedFrenchman，Iusedtomeetofteninmyearlierjournalisticdays，heldatheory，concerningman’sfuturestate，thathassincecometoaffordmemorefoodforreflectionthan，atthetime，Ishouldhavedeemedpossible。Hewasabright-eyed，eagerlittleman。OnefeltnoLotuslandcouldbeParadisetohim。

Webuildourheavenofthestonesofourdesires：totheold，red-beardedNorseman，afoetofightandacuptodrain；totheartisticGreek，agroveofanimatedstatuary；totheRedIndian，hishappyhuntingground；totheTurk，hisharem；totheJew，hisNewJerusalem，pavedwithgold；toothers，accordingtotheirtaste，limitedbytherangeoftheirimagination。

Fewthingshadmoreterrorsforme，whenachild，thanHeaven——aspicturedformebycertainofthegoodfolksroundaboutme。IwastoldthatifIwereagoodlad，keptmyhairtidy，anddidnotteasethecat，Iwouldprobably，whenIdied，gotoaplacewherealldaylongIwouldsitstillandsinghymns。（Thinkofit！asrewardtoahealthyboyforbeinggood。）Therewouldbenobreakfastandnodinner，noteaandnosupper。Oneoldladycheeredmealittlewithahintthatthemonotonymightbebrokenbyalittlemanna；buttheideaofeverlastingmannapalleduponme，andmysuggestions，concerningthepossibilitiesofsherbetorjumbles，werescoutedasirreverent。Therewouldbenoschool，butalsotherewouldbenocricketandnorounders。Ishouldfeelnodesire，soIwasassured，todoanotherangel’s"dags"byslidingdowntheheavenlybanisters。

Myonlyjoywouldbetosing。

"Shallwestartsingingthemomentwegetupinthemorning？"I

asked。

"Therewon’tbeanymorning，"wastheanswer。"Therewillbenodayandnonight。Itwillallbeonelongdaywithoutend。"

"Andshallwealwaysbesinging？"Ipersisted。

"Yes，youwillbesohappy，youwillalwayswanttosing。"

"Shan’tIevergettired？"

"No，youwillnevergettired，andyouwillnevergetsleepyorhungryorthirsty。"

"Anddoesitgoonlikethatforever？"

"Yes，foreverandever。"

"Willitgoonforamillionyears？"

"Yes，amillionyears，andthenanothermillionyears，andthenanothermillionyearsafterthat。Therewillneverbeanyendtoit。"

Icanremembertothisdaytheagonyofthosenights，whenIwouldlieawake，thinkingofthisendlessheaven，fromwhichthereseemedtobenopossibleescape。Fortheotherplacewasequallyeternal，orImighthavebeentemptedtoseekrefugethere。

Wegrown-upfolk，ourbrainsdulledbytheslowlyacquiredhabitofnotthinking，dowrongtotorturechildrenwiththeseawfulthemes。

Eternity，Heaven，Hellaremeaninglesswordstous。Werepeatthem，aswegabbleourprayers，tellingoursmug，self-satisfiedselvesthatwearemiserablesinners。Buttothechild，the"intelligentstranger"intheland，seekingtoknow，theyarefearfulrealities。

Ifyoudoubtme，Reader，standbyyourself，beneaththestars，onenight，andSOLVEthisthought，Eternity。YournextaddressshallbetheCountyLunaticAsylum。

MyactivelyinclinedFrenchfriendheldcheerierviewsthanarecommonofman’slifebeyondthegrave。Hisbeliefwasthatweweredestinedtoconstantchange，toeverlastingwork。Weweretopassthroughtheolderplanets，tolabourinthegreatersuns。

Butforsuchadvancedcareeramorecapablebeingwasneeded。Nooneofuswassufficient，heargued，tobegrantedafutureexistencealltohimself。Hisideawasthattwoorthreeorfourofus，accordingtoourintrinsicvalue，wouldbecombinedtomakeanewandmoreimportantindividuality，fittedforahigherexistence。

Man，hepointedout，wasalreadyacollectionofthebeasts。"YouandI，"hewouldsay，tappingfirstmychestandthenhisown，"wehavethemallhere——theape，thetiger，thepig，themotherlyhen，thegamecock，thegoodant；weareall，rolledintoone。Sothemanofthefuture，hewillbemadeupofmanymen——thecourageofone，thewisdomofanother，thekindlinessofathird。"

"TakeaCityman，"hewouldcontinue，"saytheLordMayor；addtohimapoet，saySwinburne；mixthemwithareligiousenthusiast，sayGeneralBooth。Thereyouwillhavethemanfitforthehigherlife。"

GaribaldiandBismarck，heheld，shouldmakeaveryfinemixture，correctingoneanother；ifneedful，extractofIbsenmightbeadded，asseasoning。HethoughtthatIrishpoliticianswouldmixadmirablywithScotchdivines；thatOxfordDonswouldgowellwithladynovelists。HewasconvincedthatCountTolstoi，afewGaietyJohnnies（wecalledthem"mashers"inthosedays），togetherwithahumourist——hewaskindenoughtosuggestmyself——wouldproducesomethingverychoice。QueenElizabeth，hefancied，wasprobablybeingreservedtogo——letushopeinthelongdistantfuture——withOuida。Itsoundsawhimsicaltheory，setdownhereinmywords，nothis；buttheoldfellowwassomuchinearnestthatfewofuseverthoughttolaughashetalked。Indeed，thereweremomentsonstarrynights，aswalkinghomefromtheoffice，wewouldpauseonWaterlooBridgetoenjoythewitcheryofthelonglineoftheEmbankmentlights，whenIcouldalmostbelieve，asIlistenedtohim，inthenotimpossibilityofhisdreams。

Evenasregardsthisworld，itwouldoftenbeagain，onethinks，andnoloss，ifsomehalf-dozenofuswererolledtogether，orboileddown，orwhatevertheprocessnecessarymightbe，andsomethingmadeoutofusinthatway。

Havenotyou，myfairReader，sometimesthoughttoyourselfwhatadelightfulhusbandTomthis，plusHarrythat，plusDicktheother，wouldmake？Tomisalwayssocheerfulandgood-tempered，yetyoufeelthatintheseriousmomentsoflifehewouldbelacking。A

delightfulhubbywhenyoufeltmerry，yes；butyouwouldnotgotohimforcomfortandstrengthinyourtroubles，nowwouldyou？No，inyourhourofsorrow，howgooditwouldbetohavenearyougrave，earnestHarry。Heisa"goodsort，"Harry。Perhaps，afterall，heisthebestofthethree——solid，staunch，andtrue。Whatapityheisjustatriflecommonplaceandunambitious。Yourfriends，notknowinghissterlinghiddenqualities，wouldhardlyenvyyou；andahusbandthatnoothergirlenviesyou——well，thatwouldhardlybesatisfactory，wouldit？Dick，ontheotherhand，iscleverandbrilliant。Hewillmakehisway；therewillcomeaday，youareconvinced，whenawomanwillbeproudtobearhisname。Ifonlyhewerenotsoself-centred，ifonlyheweremoresympathetic。

Butacombinationofthethree，orratherofthebestqualitiesofthethree——Tom’sgoodtemper，Harry’stenderstrength，Dick’sbrilliantmasterfulness：thatisthemanwhowouldbeworthyofyou。

ThewomanDavidCopperfieldwantedwasAgnesandDorarolledintoone。Hehadtotakethemoneaftertheother，whichwasnotsonice。AnddidhereallyloveAgnes，Mr。Dickens；ormerelyfeelheoughtto？Forgiveme，butIamdoubtfulconcerningthatsecondmarriageofCopperfield’s。Come，strictlybetweenourselves，Mr。

Dickens，wasnotDavid，goodhumansoul！nowandagainaweebitboredbytheimmaculateAgnes？Shemadehimanexcellentwife，Iamsure。SHEneverorderedoystersbythebarrel，unopened。Itwould，onanyday，havebeensafetoaskTraddleshometodinner；infact，Sophieandthewholerose-gardenmighthaveaccompaniedhim，Agneswouldhavebeenequaltotheoccasion。Thedinnerwouldhavebeenperfectlycookedandserved，andAgnes’sweetsmilewouldhavepervadedthemeal。ButAFTERthedinner，whenDavidandTraddlessatsmokingalone，whilefromthedrawing-roomdrifteddownthenotesofhigh-class，elevatingmusic，playedbythesaintlyAgnes，didtheynever，glancingcovertlytowardstheemptychairbetweenthem，seethelaughing，curl-framedfaceofaveryfoolishlittlewoman——oneofthosefoolishlittlewomenthatawisemanthanksGodformaking——andwish，inspiteofall，thatitwerefleshandblood，notshadow？

Oh，youfoolishwisefolk，whowouldremodelhumannature！Cannotyouseehowgreatistheworkgivenuntochildishhands？Thinkyouthatinwell-orderedhousekeepingandhigh-classconversationliesthewholemakingofaman？FoolishDora，fashionedbycleveroldmagicianNature，whoknowsthatweaknessandhelplessnessareasatalismancallingforthstrengthandtendernessinman，troubleyourselfnotundulyaboutthoseoystersnortheunderdonemutton，littlewoman。Goodplaincooksattwentypoundsayearwillseetothesethingsforus；and，nowandthen，whenawindfallcomesourway，wewilldinetogetheratamoderate-pricedrestaurantwherethesethingsaremanagedevenbetter。Yourwork，Dear，istoteachusgentlenessandkindliness。Layyourcurlshere，child。Itisfromsuchasyouthatwelearnwisdom。Foolishwisefolksneeratyou；foolishwisefolkwouldpulluptheuselesslilies，theneedlessroses，fromthegarden，wouldplantintheirplacesonlyserviceablewholesomecabbage。ButtheGardenerknowingbetter，plantsthesillyshort-livedflowers；foolishwisefolk，askingforwhatpurpose。

AsforAgnes，Mr。Dickens，doyouknowwhatshealwaysmakesmethinkof？Youwillnotmindmysaying？——thewomanonereadsabout。

Frankly，Idon’tbelieveinher。IdonotrefertoAgnesinparticular，butthewomanofwhomsheisatype，thefaultlesswomanwereadof。Womenhavemanyfaults，but，thankGod，theyhaveoneredeemingvirtue——theyarenoneofthemfaultless。

Buttheheroineoffiction！oh，aterribledragonofvirtueisshe。

Mayheavenpreserveuspoormen，undeservingthoughwebe，fromalifewiththeheroineoffiction。Sheisallsoul，andheart，andintellect，withneverabitofhumannaturetocatchholdofherby。

Herbeauty，itappalsone，itissopainfullyindescribable。Whencecomesshe，whithergoesshe，whydowenevermeetherlike？OfwomenIknowagoodishfew，andIlookamongthemforherprototype；

butIfinditnot。Theyarecharming，theyarebeautiful，allthesewomenthatIknow。Itwouldnotberightformetotellyou，Ladies，theesteemandvenerationwithwhichIregardyouall。Youyourselves，blushing，wouldbethefirsttocheekmyardour。Butyet，dearLadies，seeneventhroughmyeyes，youcomenotneartheladiesthatIreadabout。Youarenot——ifImaybepermittedanexpressivevulgarism——inthesamestreetwiththem。YourbeautyI

canlookupon，andretainmyreason——forwhatevervaluethatmaybetome。Yourconversation，Iadmit，iscleverandbrilliantintheextreme；yourknowledgevastandvarious；yourculturequiteBostonian；yetyoudonot——Ihardlyknowhowtoexpressit——youdonotshinewiththesixteenfull-moon-poweroftheheroineoffiction。Youdonot——andIthankyouforit——impressmewiththeideathatyouaretheonlywomenonearth。You，evenyou，possesstempersofyourown。Iaminclinedtothinkyoutakeaninterestinyourclothes。Iwouldnotbesure，even，thatyoudonotminglealittleof"yourownhair"（youknowwhatImean）withthehairofyourhead。Thereisinyourtemperamentaveinofvanity，asuggestionofselfishness，aspiceoflaziness。Ihaveknownyouatrifleunreasonable，alittleinconsiderate，slightlyexacting。

Unliketheheroineoffiction，youhaveacertainnumberofhumanappetitesandinstincts；afewhumanfollies，perhaps，ahumanfault，orshallwesaytwo？Inshort，dearLadies，youalso，evenaswemen，arethechildrenofAdamandEve。Tellme，ifyouknow，whereImaymeetwiththissupernaturalsisterofyours，thiswomanthatonereadsabout。Sheneverkeepsanyonewaitingwhileshedoesherbackhair，sheisneverindignantwitheverybodyelseinthehousebecauseshecannotfindherownboots，sheneverscoldstheservants，sheisnevercrosswiththechildren，sheneverslamsthedoor，sheisneverjealousofheryoungersister，sheneverlingersatthegatewithanycousinbuttherightone。

Dearme，whereDOtheykeepthem，thesewomenthatonereadsabout？

IsupposewheretheykeeptheprettygirlofArt。Youhaveseenher，haveyounot，Reader，theprettygirlinthepicture？Sheleapsthesix-barredgatewithayardandahalftospare，turningroundinhersaddlethewhiletomakesomesmilingremarktothecomicmanbehind，who，ofcourse，isstandingonhisheadintheditch。ShefloatsgracefullyoffDieppeonstormymornings。Herbaigneuse——generallyofchiffonandoldpointlace——hasnotlostacurve。Theolderladies，bathingroundher，lookwet。Theirdressclingsdamplytotheirlimbs。ButtheprettygirlofArtdives，andneveracurlofherhairisdisarranged。TheprettygirlofArtstandslightlyontip-toeandvolleysatennis-ballsixfeetaboveherhead。TheprettygirlofArtkeepstheheadofthepuntstraightagainstastiffcurrentandastrongwind。SHEnevergetsthewateruphersleeve，anddownherback，andalloverthecushions。HERpoleneversticksinthemud，withthesteamlaunchtenyardsoffandthemanlookingtheotherway。TheprettygirlofArtskatesinhigh-heeledFrenchshoesatanangleofforty-fivetothesurfaceoftheice，bothhandsinhermuff。SHEneversitsdownplump，withherfeetayardapart，andsays"Ough。"TheprettygirlofArtdrivestandemdownPiccadilly，duringtheheightoftheseason，ateighteenmilesanhour。ItneveroccurstoHERleaderthatthetimehasnowarrivedforhimtoturnroundandgetintothecart。TheprettygirlofArtridesherbicyclethroughthetownonmarketday，carryingabasketofeggs，andsmilingrightandleft。

SHEneverthrowsawaybothherhandlesandrunsintoacow。TheprettygirlofArtgoestroutfishinginopen-workstockings，underablazingsun，withabunchofdew-bespangledprimrosesinherhair；

andeverytimeshegracefullyflicksherrodshehaulsoutasalmon。

SHEnevertiesherselfuptoatree，orhooksthedog。SHEnevercomeshome，soakedanddisagreeable，totellyouthatshecaughtsix，butputthemallbackagain，becausetheyweremerelytwoorthree-pounders，andnotworththetroubleofcarrying。TheprettygirlofArtplayscroquetwithonehand，andlooksasifsheenjoyedthegame。SHEnevertriestoaccidentallykickherballintopositionwhennobodyisnoticing，orstandsitoutthatsheisthroughahoopthatsheknowssheisn’t。

Sheisagood，all-roundsportswoman，istheprettygirlinthepicture。TheonlythingIhavetosayagainstheristhatshemakesonedissatisfiedwiththegirloutofthepicture——thegirlwhomistakesapuntforateetotum，sothatyoulandfeelingasifyouhadhadadayintheBayofBiscay；andwho，everynowandagain，stunsyouwiththethickendofthepole：thegirlwhodoesnotskatewithherhandsinhermuff；butwho，throwingthemuptoheaven，says，"I’mgoing，"andwhogoes，takingcarethatyougowithher：thegirlwho，asyoubrushherdown，andtrytocomforther，explainstoyouindignantlythatthehorsetookthecornertoosharplyandnevernoticedthemile-stone；thegirlwhosehairseawaterdoesNOTimprove。

Therecanbenodoubtaboutit：thatiswheretheykeepthegoodwomanofFiction，wheretheykeeptheprettygirlofArt。

Doesitnotoccurtoyou，MessieurslesAuteurs，thatyouaresadlydisturbingus？ThesewomenthatareacombinationofVenus，St。

Cecilia，andElizabethFry！youpaintthemforusinyourglowingpages：itisnotkindofyou，knowing，asyoumust，thewomenwehavetoputupwith。

Wouldwenotbehappier，wemenandwomen，werewetoidealizeoneanotherless？Mydearyounglady，youhavenothingwhatevertocomplaintoFateabout，Iassureyou。Unclaspthoseprettyhandsofyours，andcomeawayfromthedarkeningwindow。Jackisasgoodafellowasyoudeserve；don’tyearnsomuch。SirGalahad，mydear——

SirGalahadridesandfightsinthelandthatliesbeyondthesunset，farenoughawayfromthisnoisylittleearthwhereyouandI

spendmuchofourtimetittle-tattling，flirting，wearingfineclothes，andgoingtoshows。Andbesides，youmustremember，SirGalahadwasabachelor：asanidealisthewaswise。YourJackisbynomeansabadsortofknight，asknightsgonowadaysinthisun-

idyllicworld。Thereismuchsolidhonestyabouthim，andhedoesnotpose。Heisnotexceptional，Igrantyou；but，mydear，haveyouevertriedtheexceptionalman？Yes，heisveryniceinadrawing-room，anditisinterestingtoreadabouthimintheSocietypapers：youwillfindmostofhisgoodqualitiesthere：takemyadvice，don’tlookintohimtooclosely。YoubecontentwithJack，andthankheavenheisnoworse。Wearenotsaints，wemen——noneofus，andourbeautifulthoughts，Ifear，wewriteinpoetrynotaction。TheWhiteKnight，mydearyounglady，withhispuresoul，hisheroicheart，hislife’sdevotiontoanobleendeavour，doesnotlivedownheretoanygreatextent。Theyhavetriedit，oneortwoofthem，andtheworld——youandI：theworldismadeupofyouandI——hasgenerallystarved，andhootedthem。Therearenotmanyofthemleftnow：doyouthinkyouwouldcaretobethewifeofone，supposingoneweretobefoundforyou？WouldyoucaretolivewithhimintwofurnishedroomsinClerkenwell，diewithhimonachairbedstead？Acenturyhencetheywillputupastatuetohim，andyoumaybehonouredasthewifewhosharedwithhimhissufferings。Doyouthinkyouarewomanenoughforthat？Ifnot，thankyourstarsyouhavesecured，foryourownexclusiveuse，oneofusUNexceptionalmen，whoknowsnobetterthantoadmireyou。YOUarenotexceptional。

Andinusordinarymenthereissomegood。Itwantsfinding，thatisall。Wearenotsocommonplaceasyouthinkus。EvenyourJack，fondofhisdinner，hisconversationfour-corneredbytheSportingPress——yes，Iagreeheisnotinteresting，ashesitssnoringintheeasy-chair；but，believeitornot，therearethemakingsofagreatheroinJack，ifFatewouldbutbekindertohim，andshakehimoutofhisease。

Dr。Jekyllcontainedbeneathhisamplewaist-coatnottwoegos，butthree——notonlyHydebutanother，agreaterthanJekyll——amanasneartotheangelsasHydewastothedemons。Thesewell-fedCitymen，theseGaietyJohnnies，theseplough-boys，apothecaries，thieves！withineachonelieshiddenthehero，didFate，thesculptor，choosetousehischisel。Thatlittledrabwehavenoticednowandthen，ourwaytakingusoftenpasttheendofthecourt，therewasnothingbywhichtodistinguishher。Shewasnotover-clean，couldusecoarselanguageonoccasion——justthespawnofthestreets：takecarelestthecloakofourchildshouldbrushher。

OnemorningthedistrictCoroner，not，generallyspeaking，apoethimself，butanadeptatdiscoveringpoetryburiedunderunlikelyrubbish-heaps，tellsusmoreabouther。Sheearnedsixshillingsaweek，anduponitsupportedabed-riddenmotherandthreeyoungerchildren。Shewashousewife，nurse，mother，breadwinner，rolledintoone。Yes，thereareheroinesOUToffiction。

SoloutishTomhaswontheVictoriaCross——dashedoutunderastormofbulletsandrescuedtheriddledflag。WhowouldhavethoughtitofloutishTom？Thevillagealehouseonealwaysdeemedthegoalofhisendeavours。ChancecomestoTomandwefindhimout。ToHarrytheFateswerelesskind。Ane’er-do-wellwasHarry——drank，knockedhiswifeabout，theysay。Buryhim，wearewellridofhim，hewasgoodfornothing。Arewesure？

Letusacknowledgewearesinners。Weknow，thoseofuswhodaretoexamineourselves，thatwearecapableofeverymeanness，ofeverywrongunderthesun。Itisbytheaccidentofcircumstance，aidedbythehelpfulwatchfulnessofthepoliceman，thatourpossibilitiesofcrimeareknownonlytoourselves。Buthavingacknowledgedourevil，letusalsoacknowledgethatwearecapableofgreatness。Themartyrswhofaceddeathandtortureunflinchinglyforconscience’

sake，weremenandwomenlikeourselves。Theyhadtheirwrongside。

Beforethesmalltrialsofdailylifetheynodoubtfellaswefall。

Bynomeansweretheythepickofhumanity。Thievesmanyofthemhadbeen，andmurderers，evil-livers，andevil-doers。Butthenobilitywastherealso，lyingdormant，andtheirdaycame。Amongthemmusthavebeenmenwhohadcheatedtheirneighboursoverthecounter；menwhohadbeencrueltotheirwivesandchildren；

selfish，scandal-mongeringwomen。IneasiertimestheirvirtuemightneverhavebeenknowntoanybuttheirMaker。

Ineveryageandineveryperiod，whenandwhereFatehascalleduponmenandwomentoplaytheman，humannaturehasnotbeenfoundwanting。Theywereapoorlot，thoseFrencharistocratsthattheTerrorseized：cowardly，selfish，greedyhadbeentheirlives。Yettheremusthavebeengood，eveninthem。Whenthelittlethingsthatintheirlittlelivestheyhadthoughtsogreatweresweptawayfromthem，whentheyfoundthemselvesfacetofacewiththerealities；theneventheyplayedtheman。PoorshufflingCharlestheFirst，crustedoverwithweaknessandfolly，deepdowninhimatlastwefindthegreatgentleman。

Iliketohearstoriesofthelittlenessofgreatmen。IliketothinkthatShakespearewasfondofhisglass。IevenclingtothetaleofthatdisgracefulfinalorgiewithfriendBenJonson。

Possiblythestorymaynotbetrue，butIhopeitwas。Iliketothinkofhimaspoacher，asvillagene’er-do-well，denouncedbythelocalgrammar-schoolmaster，preachedatbythelocalJ。P。oftheperiod。IliketoreflectthatCromwellhadawartonhisnose；thethoughtmakesmemorecontentedwithmyownfeatures。Iliketothinkthatheputsweetsuponthechairs，toseefinely-dressedladiesspoiltheirfrocks；totellmyselfthatheroaredwithlaughteratthesillyjest，likeanyEastEnd’ArrywithhisBankHolidaysquirtofdirtywater。IliketoreadthatCarlylethrewbaconathiswifeandoccasionallymadehimselfhighlyridiculousoversmallannoyances，thatwouldhavebeensmiledatbyamanofwell-balancedmind。Ithinkofthefiftyfoolishthingsaweek_I_

do，andsaytomyself，"I，too，amaliteraryman。"

IliketothinkthatevenJudashadhismomentsofnobility，hisgoodhourswhenhewouldwillinglyhavelaiddownhislifeforhisMaster。Perhapseventohimtherecame，beforethejourney’send，thememoryofavoicesaying——"Thysinsbeforgiventhee。"Theremusthavebeengood，eveninJudas。

Virtuelieslikethegoldinquartz，thereisnotverymuchofit，andmuchpainshastobespentontheextractingofit。ButNatureseemstothinkitworthherwhiletofashionthesehugeuselessstones，ifinthemshemayhideawayherpreciousmetals。Perhaps，also，inhumannature，shecareslittleforthemassofdross，providedthatbycrushingandcleansingshecanextractfromitalittlegold，sufficienttorepayherforthelabouroftheworld。

Wewonderwhyshetroublestomakethestone。Whycannotthegoldlieinnuggetsonthesurface？Buthermethodsaresecretstous。

Perchancethereisareasonforthequartz。Perchancethereisareasonfortheevilandfolly，throughwhichrun，unseentothecarelesseye，thetinyveinsofvirtue。

Aye，thestonepredominates，butthegoldisthere。Weclaimtohaveitvalued。Theevilthatthereisinmannotonguecantell。

Wearevileamongthevile，alittleevilpeople。Butwearegreat。

PileupthebricksofoursinstillthetowerknocksatHeaven’sgate，callingforvengeance，yetwearegreat——withagreatnessandavirtuethattheuntemptedangelsmaynotreachto。Thewrittenhistoryofthehumanrace，itisonelongrecordofcruelty，offalsehood，ofoppression。Thinkyoutheworldwouldbespinningroundthesununtothisday，ifthatwrittenrecordwereall？

Sodom，Godwouldhavesparedhadtherebeenfoundtenrighteousmenwithinitswalls。Theworldissavedbyitsjustmen。Historyseesthemnot；sheisbutthenewspaper，areportofaccidents。Judgeyoulifebythat？ThenyoushallbelievethatthetrueTempleofHymenistheDivorceCourt；thatmenareoftwoclassesonly，thethiefandthepoliceman；thatallnoblethoughtisbutapolitician’scatchword。Historyseesonlythedestroyingconflagrations，shetakesnothoughtofthesweetfire-sides。

Historynotesthewrong；butthepatientsuffering，theheroicendeavour，that，slowlyandsilently，asthesoftprocessesofNaturere-clothingwithverdurethepassion-wastedland，obliteratethatwrong，shehasnoeyesfor。Inthedaysofcrueltyandoppression——notaltogetheryetofthepast，onefears——musthavelivedgentle-heartedmenandwomen，healingwiththeirhelpandsympathythewoundsthatelsetheworldhaddiedof。Afterthethief，ridingwithjingleofswordandspur，comes，mountedonhisass，thegoodSamaritan。Thepyramidoftheworld’sevil——Godhelpus！itriseshigh，shuttingoutalmostthesun。Buttherecordofman’sgooddeeds，itlieswritteninthelaughterofthechildren，inthelightoflovers’eyes，inthedreamsoftheyoungmen；itshallnotbeforgotten。ThefiresofpersecutionservedastorchestoshowHeaventheheroismthatwasinman。Fromthesoiloftyrannysprangself-sacrifice，anddaringfortheRight。Cruelty！

whatisitbutthevilemanure，makingthegroundreadyfortheflowersoftendernessandpity？HateandAngershriektooneanotheracrosstheages，butthevoicesofLoveandComfortarenonethelessexistentthattheyspeakinwhispers，lipstoear。

Wehavedonewrong，oh，yewitnessingHeavens，butwehavedonegood。Weclaimjustice。Wehavelaiddownourlivesforourfriends：greaterlovehathnomanthanthis。WehavefoughtfortheRight。WehavediedfortheTruth——astheTruthseemedtous。

Wehavedonenobledeeds；wehavelivednoblelives；wehavecomfortedthesorrowful；wehavesuccouredtheweak。Failing，falling，makinginourblindnessmanyafalsestep，yetwehavestriven。Forthesakeofthearmyofjustmenandtrue，forthesakeofthemyriadsofpatient，lovingwomen，forthesakeofthepitifulandhelpful，forthesakeofthegoodthatlieshiddenwithinus，——spareus，OLord。

ONTHEMOTHERLINESSOFMAN

Itwasonlyapieceofbrokenglass。Fromitsshapeandcolour，I

shouldsayithad，initshappierdays，formedportionofacheapscent-bottle。Lyingisolatedonthegrass，shoneuponbytheearlymorningsun，itcertainlyappearedatitsbest。Itattractedhim。

Hecockedhishead，andlookedatitwithhisrighteye。Thenhehoppedroundtotheotherside，andlookedatitwithhislefteye。

Witheitheropticitseemedequallydesirable。

Thathewasaninexperiencedyoungrookgoeswithoutsaying。Anolderbirdwouldnothavegivenasecondglancetothething。

Indeed，onewouldhavethoughthisowninstinctmighthavetoldhimthatbrokenglasswouldbeamistakeinabird’snest。Butitsglitterdrewhimtoostronglyforresistance。Iaminclinedtosuspectthatatsometime，duringthegrowthofhisfamilytree，theremusthaveoccurredamesalliance，perhapsworse。Possiblyastrainofmagpieblood？——oneknowsthecharacterofmagpies，orrathertheirlackofcharacter——andsuchthingshavehappened。ButIwillnotpursuefurthersopainfulatrain：Ithrowoutthesuggestionasapossibleexplanation，thatisall。

Hehoppednearer。Wasitasweetillusion，thisflashingfragmentofrainbow；abeautifulvisiontofadeuponapproach，typicalofsomuchthatisun-understandableinrooklife？Hemadeadartforwardandtappeditwithhisbeak。No，itwasreal——asfinealumpofjaggedgreenglassasanynewly-marriedrookcoulddesire，andtobehadforthetaking。SHEwouldbepleasedwithit。Hewasawell-

meaningbird；themereupwardinclinationofhistailsuggestedearnestthoughpossiblyill-directedendeavour。

Heturneditover。Itwasanawkwardthingtocarry；ithadsoverymanycorners。Buthesucceededatlastingettingitfirmlybetweenhisbeak，andinhaste，lestsomeotherbirdshouldseektodisputewithhimitspossession，atonceflewoffwithit。

Asecondrookwhohadbeenwatchingtheproceedingsfromthelimetree，calledtoathirdwhowaspassing。EvenwithmylimitedknowledgeofthelanguageIfounditeasytofollowtheconversation：itwassoobvious。

"Issachar！"

"Hallo！"

"Whatdoyouthink？Zebulan’sfoundapieceofbrokenbottle。He’sgoingtolinehisnestwithit。"

"No！"

"God’struth。Lookathim。Therehegoes，he’sgotitinhisbeak。"

"Well，I’m——！"

Andtheybothburstintoalaugh。

ButZebulanheededthemnot。Ifheoverheard，heprobablyputdownthewholedialoguetojealousy。Hemadestraightforhistree。Bystandingwithmyleftcheekpressedcloseagainstthewindow-pane，I

wasabletofollowhim。HeisbuildinginwhatwecallthePaddockelms——asuburbcommencedonlylastseason，butrapidlygrowing。I

wantedtoseewhathiswifewouldsay。

Atfirstshesaidnothing。Helaiditcarefullydownonthebranchnearthehalf-finishednest，andshestretchedupherheadandlookedatit。

Thenshelookedathim。Foraboutaminuteneitherspoke。Icouldseethatthesituationwasbecomingstrained。Whenshedidopenherbeak，itwaswithasubduedtone，thathadaveinofwearinessrunningthroughit。

"Whatisit？"sheasked。

Hewasevidentlychilledbyhermanner。AsIhaveexplained，heisaninexperiencedyoungrook。Thisisclearlyhisfirstwife，andhestandssomewhatinaweofher。

"Well，Idon’texactlyknowwhatit’sCALLED，"heanswered。

"Oh。"

"No。Butit’spretty，isn’tit？"headded。Hemovedit，tryingtogetitwherethesunmightreachit。Itwasevidenthewasadmittingtohimselfthat，seenintheshade，itlostmuchofitscharm。

"Oh，yes；verypretty，"wastherejoinder；"perhapsyou’lltellmewhatyou’regoingtodowithit。"

Thequestionfurtherdiscomfortedhim。Itwasgrowinguponhimthatthisthingwasnotgoingtobethesuccesshehadanticipated。Itwouldbenecessarytoproceedwarily。

"Ofcourse，it’snotatwig，"hebegan。

"Iseeitisn’t。"

"No。Yousee，thenestisnearlyalltwigsasitis，andIthought——

"

"Oh，youdidthink。"

"Yes，mydear。Ithought——unlessyouareofopinionthatit’stooshowy——Ithoughtwemightworkitinsomewhere。"

Thensheflaredout。