第6章

Todescendabruptlyfromthesublime，toveryneartheridiculous，-Ihadneedlastsummerofaboytogowithaladyonatrapandhelpaboutthestable。SoIappliedtoafriend"scoachman，ahard-workingEnglishman，whowasdelightedtogettheplaceforhisnephew-anAmerican-bornboy-thechildofasister，ingreatneed。Astheboy"sclotheswerehardlypresentable，asimpleliverywasmadeforhim；fromthatmomenthepined，andfinallyannouncedhewasgoingtoleave。Inanswertomysurprisedinquiries，Idiscoveredthatafriendofhisfromthesametenement-houseinwhichhehadlivedinNewYorkhadappearedinthevillage，andsoonerthanbeseeninliverybyhisplay-fellowhepreferredabandoninghisgoodplace，thechanceofbeingofaidtohismother，andlearninganhonorablewaytoearnhisliving。

Remonstranceswereinvain；tothewrathofhisuncle，hedeparted。

Theboyhad，athisschool，heardsomuchabouteverybodybeingbornequalandeveryAmericanbeingagentlemanbyrightofinheritance，thathehadtakenhimselfseriously，anddespisedapositionhisunclewasproudtohold，preferringelegantleisureinhisnativetenement-housetothehumiliationofalivery。

WhenatcollegeIhadroomsinaneatcottageownedbyanAmericanfamily。Thefatherwasabutcher，aswerehissons。Theonlydaughterwasexceedinglypretty。Thehard-workedmotherconceivedhighhopesforthisfavoritechild。Shewassenttoaboarding-

school，fromwhichshereturnedentirelyunsettledforlife，havinglearnedlittleexcepttobeashamedofherparentsandtoplayonthepiano。Oneoftheseinstrumentsoftorturewasbought，andaroomfittedupasaparlorforthedaughter"suse。Asthefamilywerefairlywell-to-do，shewasallowedtodressoutofallkeepingwithherparents"position，and，eggedonbyhermother，triedherbesttomarryarich"student。"Failinginthis，shebecamediscontented，unhappy，andfinallytherewasascandal，thispoorvictimofafalseambitiongoingtoswellthevasttideofacity"svice。Withasensibleeducation，basedontheideathatherfather"stradewashonorableandthathermissioninlifewastoaidhermotherinthedailyworkuntilshemightmarryandgotoherhusband，preparedbyexperiencetocookhisdinnerandkeephishouseclean，andfinallybringupherchildrentobehonestmenandwomen，thisgirlwouldhavefoundahappyfuturewaitingforher，andhavebeenofsomegoodinherhumbleway。

Itisuselesstomultiplyillustrations。Onehasbuttolookabouthiminthisunsettledcountryofours。Theotherdayinfrontofmydoortheperennialditchwasbeingdugforsomegas-pipeorother。Twoofthegentlemenwhohadconsentedtodothislaborworefrock-coatsandtophats-orwhathadoncebeenthosearticlesofattire-insteadofcomfortableandappropriateoveralls。Why？Because，likethestable-boy，tohavewornanydistinctivedresswouldhavebeenintheirmindstostampthemselvesasbelongingtoaninferiorclass，andsointerferedwiththeirchancesofrepresentingthiscountrylaterattheCourtofSt。James，orpresidingovertheSenate，-positions(tojudgebytheircriticismofthepresentincumbents)theyfeelnodoubtastotheirabilitytofill。

Thesamespiritpervadeseverytrade。Theyouthwhoshavesmeisnotabarber；hehasonlyacceptedthispositionuntilhehastimetodosomethingbetter。Thewaiterwhobringsmemychopatadown-townrestaurantwouldresignhisplaceifhewererequestedtoshavehisflowingmustache，andissecretlystudyinglaw。IloseallpatiencewithmycountrymenasIthinkoverit!Surelywearenotsucharaceofsnobsasnottorecognizethatagoodbarberismoretoberespectedthanapoorlawyer；that，asaFrenchsayinggoes，ILN"YAPASDESOTMETIER。Itisonlythefoolwhoisashamedofhistrade。

Butenoughofpreaching。Ihadintended-whenItookupmypento-day-towriteonquiteanotherformofthismodernfolly，thiseternalstruggleupwardintocirclesforwhichthestrugglerisfittedneitherbyhisbirthnorhiseducation；theabovewastohavebeenbutaprefacetothematterIhadinmind，viz。，"socialclimbers，"thosescourgesofmodernsociety，thepeoplewhomnorebuffswilldiscourageandnocoldshoulderchill，whoseeffortshavedonesomuchtomakeourcountrymenabywordabroad。

Asmanyphilosophersteachthattroubleonlyispositive，happinessbeingmerelyrelative；thatinanycasetroubleisprettyequallydistributedamongthedifferentconditionsofmankind；that，exceptingthedestituteandphysicallyafflicted，allGod"screatureshaveashareofjoyintheirlives，woulditnotbemorelogical，aswellasmoreconducivetothegeneralgood，ifalittlemoreweredonetomaketheyoungcontentedwiththeirlotinlife，insteadofconstantlysuggestingtoaracealreadypronetobeunsettled，thatnothingshortofthetopisworthyofanAmericancitizen？

CHAPTER26-TheClimberTHATformofmisplacedambition，whichisthesubjectoftheprecedingchapter，canonlyberegardedseriouslywhenitoccursamongsimpleandsincerepeople，who，howeverderided，honestlybelievethattheyaredoingtheirdutytothemselvesandtheirfamilieswhentheymoveheavenandearthtoriseafewstepsintheworld。Themomentwefindambitiontakingapurelysocialform，itbecomesridiculous。Theaimissopaltryincomparisonwiththeeffort，andsooutofproportionwiththeenergy-exertedtoattainit，thatonecanonlylaughandwonder!Unfortunately，signsofthispuerilespirit(peculiartothelastquarterofthenineteenthcentury)canbeseenonallhandsandinalmosteverysociety。

Thatanymanorwomanshouldmakeittheuniqueaimandobjectofexistencetogetintoacertain"set，"notfromanyhopeofprofitorbenefit，norfromthebeliefthatitiscomposedofbrilliantandamusingpeople，butsimplybecauseitpassesforbeingexclusiveanddifficultofaccess，doesatfirstseemincredible。

Thathumbleyoungpaintersorsingersshouldlongtoknowpersonallythegreatlightsoftheirprofessions，andshouldstrivetobeacceptedamongthemiseasilyunderstood，sincetheaspirantscanreapbutbenefit，presentandfuture，fromsuchcompanionship。

Thatarisingpoliticianshoulddeemitall-importanttobeonfriendlytermswiththe"bosses"isnotastonishing，forthosemagnateshaveitintheirpowertomakeormarhisfortune。ButinaMILIEUasfluctuatingasanysocialcirclemustnecessarilybe，shadingoffonallsidesandchangingasconstantlyaslightonwater，theendcanneverbeconsideredasachievedorthegoalattained。

Neitherdoesanyparticularresultaccompanysuccess，moresubstantialthanthemoralonewhichliesinself-congratulation。

That，however，isenoughforaclimberifsheisbittenwiththe"ascending"madness。(Isay"she，"becausethisformofambitionismorefrequentamongwomen，althoughbynomeansunknowntothesternersex。)

ItamusesmevastlytositinmycornerandwatchoneoftheseFIN-

DE-SIECLEdiplomatistsworkoutherlittleproblem。Shegenerallycomesplungingintoourcityfromoutside，hotforconquest，makingacquaintancesrightandleft，indiscriminately；thusfallinganeasypreytothewolvesthatprowlaroundtheedgesofsociety，waitingforjustsuchlambstodevour。Herfirstentertainmentsareworthattendingforshehasingeniouslycontrivedtogettogetherallthepeoplesheshouldhaveleftout，andfailedtoattractthesociallightsandpowersofthemoment。Ifshebeaquick-wittedlady，shesoonseestheerrorofherwaysandbeginsaprocessof"weeding"-asdifficultasitisunwise，eachrejected"weed"instantlybecominganenemyforlife，nottospeakoftheriskshe，inherignorance，runsofmistakingfor"detrimentals"

theFINESFLEURSoftheworldlyparterre。Ah!thewayoftheClimberishard；shenowbeginstoseethatherpathisnotstrewnwithflowers。

Onetactfulpersonofthiskind，whosegradual"unfolding"waswatchedwithmuchamusementandwonderbyheracquaintances，avoidedalltheseerrorsbygoinginearlyfora"dearfriend。"

Having，aftermaturereflection，chosenherguideamongthemostexclusiveoftheyoungmatrons，sheproceededquietlytopayhercourtENREGLE。Flatteringlittlenotes，boxesofcandy，andbunchesofflowerswereamongtheformsherdevotiontook。Asanaturalresult，thesetwoladiesbecameinseparable，andthemosthermeticallysealeddoorsopenedbeforethenewarrival。

Atalentformusicoractingisanotheraid。Afewyearsagoanentirefamilywerefloatedintothedesiredhavenonthewavesofthesister"svoice，andoneyoungcoupleachievedsuccessbythehusband"saptitudeforgamesandsports。Inthelattercaseitwasthemanofthefamilywhodidthework，dragginghiswifeupafterhim。Apoloponyishardlyone"sideaofabattle-horse，butinthiscaseitboreitsriderontosuccess。

Onceclimbershavesucceededininstallingthemselvesinthestrongholdoftheirambitions，theybecomemoreexclusivethantheirnewfriendseverdreamedofbeing，andittriesone"sself-

restrainttohearthesenewarrivalsdeploring"thelevellingtendenciesoftheage，"orwondering"hownicepeoplecanbebeginningtocallonthosehorridSo-and-Sos。Theirfathersoldshoes，youknow。"Thisultra-exclusivenessisnottobewonderedat。Theonlyattractionthecircletheyhavejustenteredhasfortheclimbersisitsexclusiveness，andtheydonotintendthatitshallloseitsmarketvalueintheirhands。LikeBaudelaire，theybelievethat"itisonlythesmallnumbersavedthatmakesthecharmofParadise。"Havingspenthardcashinthisinvestment，theyhaveeveryintentionofgettingtheirmoney"sworth。

Inordertogiveoutsidersavividimpressionofthefootingonwhichtheystandwiththegreatoftheworld，allthewomentheyhavejustmetbecomeNellysandJennys，andallthemenDicksandFreds-behindtheirbacks，BIENENTENDU-forMrs。"Newcome"hasnotyetreachedthatpointofintimacywhichwarrantsusingsuchabbreviationsdirectlytotheowners。

Anotheramiableweaknesscommontotheclimberisthatofknowingeverybody。NonamecanbementionedathomeorabroadbutParvenuhappenstobeonthemostintimatetermswiththeowner，andwhenheisconversing，greatnamesdropoutofhismouthasplentifullyasdidthepearlsfromtheprettylipsofthegirlinthefairystory。Alltheworldknowshowsuchagentleman，beingaskedonhisreturnfromtheEastifhehadseen"theDardanelles，"

answered，"Oh，dear，yes!Idinedwiththemseveraltimes!"thussettlingsatisfactorilyhisstandingintheOrient!

Climbing，likeeveryotherhabit，soontakespossessionofthewholenature。Toabstainfromitistorture。Napoleon，wearetold，founditimpossibletorestcontentedonhissuccesses，butwasimpelledonwardbyaforcestrongerthanhisvolition。Insomesuchspirittheambitioussoulsherereferredto，after"theConquestofAmerica"andthediscoverythatthefruitoftheirstruggleswasnotworthverymuch，victoryhavingbroughttheinevitablesatietyinitswake，sailawayinsearchofnewfieldsofadventure。Theyhavelongagoleftbehindthefriendsandacquaintancesoftheirchildhood。Relationstheyapparentlyhavenone，whichaccountsforthecuriousphenomenonthataparvenuisneverinmourning。Asnofriendshipsbindthemtotheirnewcircle，thetiesareeasilyloosened。Whyshouldtheycareforonecitymorethanforanother，unlessitoffermoreofthesporttheylove？Thiscontinenthasbecometame，sincethereisnolongeranystruggle，whileovertheseavasthuntinggroundsandgameworthyoftheirpowder，formanirresistibletemptation-oldandexclusivesocietiestobebesieged，andconteststobewagedcomparedtowhichtheirAmericanexperiencesarebutlightskirmishes。Asthepoloponyissupposedtopantforthefray，sotheheartsofsocialconquerorswarmwithinthemattheprospectofmorebrilliantvictories。

Thepleasureoffollowingthemontheirhuntingpartiesabroadwillhavetobedeferred，sovastisthesubject，sofullofthrillingadventureand，alas!alsoofhumiliatingdefeat。

CHAPTER27-TheLastoftheDandiesSOcompletelyhasthedandydisappearedfromamongus，thateventhewordhasanold-timelook(asifithadstrayedoutofsomehalf-forgottennovelor"keepsake")，raisinginourmindsthepictureofaslender，clean-shavenyouth，inverytightunmentionablesstrappedunderhisfeet，adarkgreenfrock-coatwithacollaruptotheearsandastockwhosefoldscoverhischest，butter-coloredgloves，andahat-oh!ahatthatwouldcollectacrowdintwominutesinanyneighborhood!Agold-headedstick，andaquizzingglass，withablackribbonaninchwide，completethetoilet。InsucharigdidtheswellsofthelastgenerationstrolldownPallMallordrivetheirtilburysintheBois。

TherecentillnessofthePrincedeSaganhasmadeastrangeandsadimpressioninmanycirclesinParis，forhehasalwaysbeenafavorite，andisthelastsurvivingtypeofanowextinctspecies。

HeisthelastDandy!Nounderstudywillbefoundtofillhisrole-thedudeandtheswellarewholegenerationsawayfromthedandy，ofwhichtheyarebutfeeblereflections-thecomedywillhavetobecontinuednow，withoutitsleadinggentleman。Withhisheadofsilveryhair，hiseye-glassandhiswonderfulwaistcoats，heheldthefirstplaceinthe"highlife"oftheFrenchcapital。

Nofirstnightorballwascompletewithouthim，Sagan。Theverymentionofhisnameintheirarticlesmusthavekeptthewolffromthedoorofneedyreporters。NoDEBUTANTE，socialortheatrical，feltsureofhersuccessuntilithadreceivedthehall-markofhisapproval。Whenheassistedatadressrehearsal，theactorsandthemanagerspaidhimmoreattentionthanSarceyorSardou，forhewasknowntobetherealarbiteroftheirfate。Hiswordwaslaw，theworldbowedbeforeitasbeforethewillofanautocrat。

MaturematronsreceivedhisdictateswiththesamereverencethattheOldGuardevincedforNapoleon"sorders。Hadhenotledthemontovictoryintheiryouth？

Ontheboulevardsoratarace-course，hewastheonepersonalwaysknownbysightandpointedout。"TheregoesSagan!"Hehadbecomeaninstitution。Onedoesnotknowexactlyhoworwhyheachievedtheposition，whichmadehimthemostfollowed，flattered，andcopiedmanofhisday。Itcertainlywasunique!

ThePrinceofSaganisdescendedfromMauricedeSaxe(thenaturalsonoftheKingofSaxonyandAuroraofKoenigsmark)，whoinhisdayshonebrilliantlyattheFrenchcourtandwassomadlylovedbyAdrienneLecouvreur。Fromhisgreatancestor，SaganinheritedthetitleofGrandDukeOfCourland(theestateshavebeenabsorbedintoaneighboringempire)。Nevertheless，heisstillanR。H。，andwhencrownedheadsvisitParistheydinewithhimandreceivehimonafootingofequality。Hemarriedagreatfortune，andthedaughterofthebankerSelliere。TheirhouseontheEsplanadedesInvalideshasbeenforyearsthecentreofaristocraticlifeinParis；notthemostexclusivecircle，butcertainlythegayestofthisgaycapital，andfromthedaysofLouisPhilippehehasgiventhekeynotetothefastset。

Oddlyenough，hehasalwaysbeenagreatfavoritewiththelowerclasses(apopularitysharedbyallthefamousdandiesofhistory)。

Thepeopleappeartofindinthemthepersonificationofallaspirationstowardtheelegantandtheideal。Alcibiades，Buckingham，theDucdeRichelieu，LordSeymour，Comted"Orsay，Brummel，Grammont-Caderousse，sharedthisfavor，andhaveremainedlegendarycharacters，towhomtheirdisdainforeverythingvulgar，theirworshipoftheirownpersons，andmanycostlyfolliesgaveanephemeralempire。Theirpowerwasthemorearbitraryanddespoticinthatitwasonlynominalandundefined，allowingthemtoruleoverthefashions，thetastes，andthepastimesoftheircontemporarieswithundividedsway，makingthemenvied，obeyed，loved，butrarelyoverthrown。

Ithasbeenassertedbysomewritersthatdandiesarenecessaryandusefultoanation(Thackerayadmiredthemandpointedoutthattheyhaveamostdifficultanddelicateroletoplay，hencetheirrarity)，andthatthesebutterflies，asonefindstheminthenovelsofthatday，thedeMarsys，thePelhams，theMaximedeTrailles，areindispensabletotheperfectionofsociety。Itisagreatmisfortunetoacountrytohavenodandies，thosesupremevirtuososoftasteanddistinction。Germany，whichgloriesinMozartandKant，GoetheandHumboldt，thecountryofdeepthinkersandbravesoldiers，neverhadagreatdandy，andsohasremainedbehindEnglandorFranceinallthatconstitutesthegracefulsideoflife，therefinementsofsocialintercourse，andtheartofliving。Francewillperceivetoolate，afterhehasdisappeared，thelossshehassustainedwhenthisPrince，GrandSeigneur，hasceasedtoembellishbyhispresenceherrace-coursesand"firstnights。"Areputationlikehiscannotbeimprovisedinamoment，andhehasnopupils。

Neverdidthearistocracyofacountrystandingreaterneedofsucharepresentation，thaninthesedaysoftramcarsand"fixed-

price"restaurants。Anentire"art"dieswithhim。Ithasbeenwhisperedthathehasnotentirelyjustifiedhisreputation，thattheaccountsofhisexploitsasaHAUTVIVEURhavegainedinthetelling。Neverthelesshedominatedanepoch，risingabovethetumultuousandlevellingsocietyofhisday，atardyDonQuixote，oftheknighthoodofpleasures，FETES，lovesandprodigalities，whicharenolongerofourtime。Hisgreatname，hisgrandmanner，hiselderlygraces，hisserenecarelessness，madehimabeingbyhimself。Noonewillsucceedthismasterofdepartedelegances。

Ifhedoesnotrecoverfromhisattack，iftheparalysisdoesnotleavethatpoorbrain，wornoutwithdoingnothing，wecanhonestlysaythatheisthelastofhiskind。

Anoriginalandindependentthinkerhasassertedthatcivilizations，societies，empires，andrepublicsgodowntoposteritytypifiedfortheadmirationofmankind，eachundertheformofsomehero。EmersonwouldhavegivenaplaceinhisPantheontoSagan。Foritishewhosustainedthetraditionsandbecamethetypeofthatdistinguishedandfrivoloussociety，whichjudgedthatseriousthingswereofnoimportance，enthusiasmawasteoftime，literatureabore；thatnothingwasinterestingandworthyofoccupyingtheirattentionexcepttheelegantdistractionsthathelpedtopasstheirdays-andnights!Hehadthemerit(？)inthesedaysofthepracticalandthecommonplace，ofpreservinginhisgraciouspersonallthecharminguselessnessofacourtierinacountrywheretherewasnolongeracourt。

Whatastrangesightitwouldbeifthisdepartingdandycould，beforeheleavesforeverthetheatreofsomanytriumphs，takehisplaceatsomestreetcorner，andreviewtheshadesofthecompanionshislonglifehadthrownhimwith，theendlessprocessionofdepartedbellesandbeaux，who，intheiryouth，had，underhisrule，helpedtodictatethefashionsandleadthesportsofaworld。

CHAPTER28-ANationontheWingONbeingtakentheotherdaythroughalargeandcostlyresidence，withthethoroughnessthatonlytheownerofanewhousehasthecrueltytoinflictonhisvictims，notallowingthemtopassaclosetoranelectricbellwithouthavingitsparticularuseandconvenienceexplained，forcingthemtolookupcoal-slides，anddownair-shaftsandtovisiteverysecretplace，fromthecellartothefire-escape，Inoticedthatapeculiararrangementoftheroomsrepeateditselfoneachfloor，andseveraltimesonafloor。I

remarkedittomyhost。

"Youobserveit，"hesaid，withablushofpride，"itismywife"sidea!Thetruthis，mydaughtersareofamarryingage，andmysonsstartingoutforthemselves；thishousewillsoonbemuchtoobigfortwooldpeopletoliveinalone。Wehaveplanneditsothatatanytimeitcanbechangedintoanapartmenthouseatanominalexpense。Itisevenwiredandplumbedwiththatendinview!"

Thisanswerpositivelytookmybreathaway。Ilookedatmyhostinamazement。Itwashardtobelievethatamanpastmiddleage，whoafteryearsofhardesttoilcouldaffordtoputhalfamillionintoahouseforhimselfandhischildren，andstoreitwithbeautifulthings，wouldhavethecouragetolooksofarintothefutureastoseeallhisworkundone，hishometurnedtoanotheruseandhimselfandhiswifeafloatintheworldwithoutaroofovertheirwealthyoldheads。

SurelythiswastheSpiritoftheAgeinitspurestexpression，themorestrikinglysothatheseemedtofeelprideratherthananythingelseinhisingeniouscombination。

Helikedthecityhehadbuiltinwellenoughnow，butnothingprovedtohimthathewouldlikeitlater。HeandhiswifehadlivedintwentycitiessincetheybegantheirbravefightwithFortune，farawayinalittleEasterntown。Theyhadsincechangedtheirabodewitheachascendingrungoftheladderofsuccess，andbeyondafadeddaguerreotypeortwooftheirchildrenandafewmodestpiecesofjewelry，storedawayincotton，itisdoubtfuliftheyownedasingleobjectbelongingtotheirearlylife。

Anothercaseoccurstome。NearthevillagewhereIpassmysummers，therelivedanelderly，childlesscoupleonasplendidestatecombiningeverythingafastidioustastecoulddemand。Onefinemorningthisplacewassold，theimportantlibrarydividedbetweenthevillageandtheirnativecity，thefurnituresoldorgivenaway，-everythingwent；attheendthethingsnoonewantedweremadeintoabon-fireandburned。

Aneighboraskingwhyallthiswasbeingdonewastoldbythelady，"Weweretiredofitallandhavedecidedtobe"Bohemians"fortherestofourlives。"ThiscouplearenowwanderingaboutEuropeandhalfadozentrunkscontaintheirbelongings。

Theseare，ofcourse，extremecasesandmustbetakenforwhattheyareworth；neverthelesstheyarestrawsshowingwhichwaythewindblows，signsofthetimesthathewhorunsmayread。Idonotrun，butIoftensaunterupourprincipalavenue，andalwaysfindmyselfwonderingwhatwillbethefutureofthesplendidresidencesthatgracethatthoroughfareasitnearsthePark；theascendingtideoftradeisalreadycirclingroundthemandeachyearseesoneormorecrumbleawayanddisappear。

Thefinerbuildingsmayremain，turnedintoclubsorrestaurants，butthegreaterpartoftheneweronesaresoill-adaptedtoanyotherusethanthatforwhichtheyarebuiltthattheirfutureseemsobscure。

Thatfashionwillflitawayfromitspresenthauntstherecanbelittledoubt；thecitybelowtheParkissuretobegivenuptobusiness，andeventhefinefrontageonthatgreenspacewillsoonerorlaterbeoccupiedbyhotels，ifnotstores；andhewhobuildswithanybeliefinthepermanencyofhissurroundingsmustindeedbeofahopefuldisposition。

Agoodladyoccupyingadelightfulcorneronthissameavenue，oppositeaone-storyflorist"sshop，said:

"Ishallremainhereuntiltheybuildacrosstheway；thenI

supposeIshallhavetomove。"

Soafterallthemanwhoiscontentedtoliveinafutureapartmenthouse，maynotbesoveryfarwrong。

Acaseoftheoppositekindisthatofagreatmillionaire，who，dying，lefthishouseanditscollectionstohiseldestsonandhisgrandsonafterhim，ontheconditionthattheyshouldcontinuetoliveinit。

Herewasanattempttokeeptogetherahomewithitsmemoriesandassociations。Whathasbeentheresult？Thestreetthatwasacharmingcentreforresidencestwentyyearsagohasbecomea"slum；"theunfortunateheirsfindthemselveswithahouseontheirhandsthattheycannotliveinandareforbiddentorentorsell。

Asafinalresultthewillmustinallprobabilitybebrokenandthematterended。

Ofcoursethereasonforagreatdealofthisisthephenomenalgrowthofourlargercities。Hundredsoffamilieswhowouldgladlyremainintheiroldhomesarefairlypushedoutofthembythegrowthofbusiness。

EverythinghasitslimitsandatimemustcomewhenourcitieswillceasetoexpandorwhencentreswillbeformedasinLondonorParis，wheregenerationsmaysucceedeachotherinthesamehomes。

Sofar，Iseenoindicationsofanysuchcrystallizationinthisourbigcity；weseemtobecondemnedlikethe"WanderingJew"orpoorlittle"Joe"tobeperpetually"movingon。"

AtadinnerofyoungpeoplenotlongagoaFrenchmanvisitingourcountry，expressedhissurpriseonhearingagirlspeakof"notrememberingthehouseshewasbornin。"Piquedbyhismannertheyoungladyanswered:

"Wearetwenty-fouratthistable。Idonotbelievethereisonepersonherelivinginthehouseinwhichheorshewasborn。"Thisassertionraisedamurmurofdissentaroundthetable；onacensusbeingtakenitproved，however，tobetrue。

Howcanoneexpect，undercircumstanceslikethese，tofindanygreatrespectamongyoungpeopleforhomelifeortheconservativesideofexistence？Theyarebornasitwereonthewing，andonthewingwilltheylive。

Theconditionsoflifeinthiscountry，althoughcontributinglargelytosuchastateofaffairs，mustnotbeheld，however，entirelyresponsible。Underlyingourcivilizationandculture，thereisstillstronginusawildnomadicstraininheritedfromathousandgenerationsofwanderingancestors，whichbreaksoutsosoonasmanisfreedfromtherestraintincumbentonbread-winningforhisfamily。Themomentthereiswealthorevenamodestincomeinsured，comestheinclinationtocutloosefromthedullroutineofbusinessandduty，returninginstinctivelytothemigratoryhabitsofprimitiveman。

Wearenottheonlynationthathasgivenitselfuptoglobe-

trotting；itisstrongintheEnglish，inspiteoftheirconservativeeducation，anditissurprisingtoseethenumberofformerlystay-at-homeFrenchandGermansonemeetswanderinginforeignlands。

In1855，aLondoneradvertisedtheplanhehadconceivedoftakingsomepeopleovertovisittheInternationalExhibitioninParis。

Forafixedsumpaidinadvanceheofferedtoprovideeverythingandactascouriertotheparty，andsucceededwiththegreatestdifficultyingettingtogethertenpeople。Fromthismodestbeginninghasgrownthevastundertakingthatto-daycoverstheglobewithtourists，fromthefrozenseaswherethey"do"themidnightsun，tothedesertsthreethousandmilesuptheNile。

AsIwasreturningacoupleofyearsagoVIAViennafromConstantinople，thetrainwasfilledwithapartyofourcompatriotsconductedbyanagencyofthiskind-simplepeopleofsmallmeanswho，twentyyearsago，wouldassoonhavethoughtofleavingtheirhomesforatripintheEastastheywouldofstartingoffinballoonsenroutefortheinter-stellarspaces。

Idoubtedatthetimeastotheamountofinformationandappreciationtheybroughttobearontheirtravels，soItookoccasiontodrawoneofthethin，unsmilingwomenintoconversation，askingherwheretheyintendedstoppingnext。

"AtBuda-Pesth，"sheanswered。Isaidinsomeamusement:

"ButthatwasBuda-Pesthwevisitedsocarefullyyesterday。"

"Oh，wasit，"shereplied，withoutanyvisiblechangeonherface，"Ithoughtwehadnotgotthereyet。"Apparentlyitwasenoughforhertobetravelling；therestwasoflittleimportance。Laterintheday，whenaskedifshehadvisitedacertainoldcityinGermany，shetoldmeshehadbutwouldnevergothereagain:"Theygaveussuchpoorcoffeeatthehotel。"Againlaterinspeakingtoherhusband，whoseemedatriflevagueastowhetherhehadseenNurembergornot，shesaid:

"Why，yourememberitverywell；itwasthereyouboughtthoseniceovershoes!"

Allofwhichleftmewithsomedoubtsinmymindastothecultivatinginfluencesofforeigntravelontheirminds。

Youcannotchangealeopard"sspots，neithercanyoualterthenatureofarace，andoneofthestrongestcharacteristicsoftheAnglo-Saxon，isthenomadicinstinct。Howoftenonehearspeoplesay:

"Iamnotgoingtositathomeandtakecareofmyfurniture。I

wanttoseesomethingoftheworldbeforeIamtooold。"Lately，asprightlymaidenofuncertainyears，justreturnedfromalongtripabroad，wasaskedifsheintendednowtosettledown。

"Settledown，indeed!I"mabutterflyandIneverexpecttosettledown。"

Thereiscertainlyfoodhereforreflection。Whyshouldwebemoreinclinedtowanderthanourneighbors？Perhapsitisinameasureduetoournervous，restlesstemperament，whichisitselftheresultofourclimate；butwhateverthecauseis，inabilitytoremainlonginoneplaceishavingamostunfortunateinfluenceonoursociallife。Wheneveryoneisonthemoveorlongingtobe，itbecomesdifficulttoformanybutthemostsuperficialties；strongfriendshipsbecomeimpossible，themostintimatefamilyrelationsareloosened。

Ifonewereofaspeculativeframeofmindandchosetotakeasthebasisforacalculationtheincreaseintouristsbetween1855，whenthetenpioneersstartedforParis，andthenumber"personallyconducted"overlandandseatoday，andthenglanceforwardatwhatthefuturewillbeifthisratioofincreaseismaintainedtheresultwouldbesomethingtooawfulforwords。Foriftenhavebecomeamillioninfortyyears，whatwillbethetotalin1955？

Nothinglessthanentirenationsgivenovertosight-seeing，passingtheirlivesandincomesinrushingaimlesslyabout。

Ifthefacilitiesofcommunicationincreaseastheyundoubtedlywillwiththedemand，theprospectbecomesnearertheideaofa"WalpurgisNight"thananythingelse。Fortheearthandtheseawillbecoveredandtheairfilledwitheveryformofwhirling，flying，plungingdevicetogetmenquicklyfromoneplacetoanother。

EveryhumanbeingontheglobewillbeflyingSouthforthecoldmonthsandNorthforthehotseason。

Aspersonallyconductedtourshavebeensosatisfactory，agencieswillbestartedtoleadusthroughallthestagesofexistence。

Parentswillsubscribeonthebirthoftheirchildrentohavethempersonallyconductedthroughlifeandeverythingexplainedasitisdoneatpresentinthegalleriesabroad；food，lodgingandreadingmatter，husbandsandwiveswillbeprovidedbycontract，tobetakenbackandchangedifunsatisfactory，asthebigstoresdowiththeirgoods。Delightfulprospect!Homeswillbecomesuperfluous，parentsandchildrenwillonlymeetwhentheir"tours"happentocrosseachother。Ourgreat-grandchildrenwillfloatthroughlifefreedfromeveryresponsibilityandmoreperfectlyindependentthaneventhatdelightfuldreamer，Bellamy，venturedtopredict。

CHAPTER29-HusksAMONGtheProtestantsdrivenfromFrancebythatastuteandliberal-mindedsovereignLouisXIV。，wereacolonyofweavers，whoasalltheworldknows，settledatSpitalfieldsinEngland，wheretheirdescendantsweavesilktothisday。

OntheirarrivalinGreatBritain，beforetheloomscouldbesetupandamarketfoundfortheirindustry，theexileswerereducedtothelastextremityofdestitutionandhunger。Lookingaboutthemforanythingthatcouldbeutilizedforfood，theydiscoveredthattheownersofEnglishslaughter-housesthrewawayasworthless，thetailsofthecattletheykilled。LikeallthepoorinFrance，thesewandererswereexcellentcooks，andknewthatathomesuchcaudalappendageswerehighlyvaluedforthetendernessandflavorofthemeat。TotheamazementanddisgustoftheEnglishvillagersthenewarrivalsproceededtocollectthis"refuse"andcarryithomeforfood。AsthefirstprincipleofFrenchculinaryartisthePOT-AU-FEU，thetailsweremostlyconvertedintosoup，onwhichtheexilesthrivedandfeasted。

Theirneighbors，enviousatseeingthedespisedFrenchindulgingdailyinsavorydishes，unknowntoEnglishpalates，andtemptedlike"Jack"s"giantbythesmellof"freshmeat，"begantoinquireintothematter，andslowlyrealizedhow，intheirignorance，theyhadbeenthrowingawaysucculentanddelicatefood。Thenewsofthisdiscoverygraduallyspreadingthroughallclasses，"ox-tail"

becameandhasremainedthenationalEnglishsoup。

Ifthisveracioustalecouldbetwistedintoametaphor，itwouldservemarvellouslytoillustratethepositionoftheentireAnglo-

Saxonrace，andespeciallythatoftheirAmericandescendantsasregardstheLatinpeoples。Forfoolishprodigalityandreckless，ignorantextravagance，however，weleaveourEnglishcousinsfarbehind。

TwoAmericanhotelscometomymind，asdifferentintheirappearanceandmanagementastheyaregeographicallyasunder。BotharetypesandillustrationsofthewilfulwastethathasrecentlyexcitedMr。IanMaclaren"scomment，andthewoefulwant(ofgoodfood)thatistheresult。Atone，adrearyshingleconstructiononatreelessisland，offourNewEnglandcoast，wheretheideasofthelandlordandhisguestshaveremainedasunchangedandprimitiveastheislanditself，Ifoundoninquirythatallarticlesoffoodcomingfromthefirsttablewerethrownintothesea；andIhavemyselfseenchickenshardlytouched，roundsofbeef，traysofvegetables，andeveryvarietyofcakeanddesserttossedtothefish。

WhilewewerehavingsoupssothinandtastelessthattheywouldhavemadeaFrenchhouse-wifeblush，theingredientsessentialtoanexcellent"stock"werecastaside。Theboarderswerepayingfivedollarsadayandappearedcontented，theplacewaspacked，thelandlordcoiningmoney，soitwasfoolishtoexpectanyimprovement。

Theotherhotel，avastcaravansaryintheSouth，whereafortunehadbeenlavishedinprovidingeverymodernconvenienceandluxury，wasthe"fad"ofitswealthyowner。Ihadmanytalkswiththemanagerduringmystay，andcametorealizethatmostofthewastefulnessIsawaroundmewasnothisfault，butthatofthepublic，towhosetastehewasobligedtocater。Atdinner，afterreceivingyourorder，thewaiterwoulddisappearforhalfanhour，andthenbringyourentiremealononetray，theover-cookedmeatsstrandedinlakesofcoagulatedgravy，theentreescoldandtheiceswarm。Hehadgenerallyforgottentwoorthreeessentials，buttosendbackforthemmeanttowaitanotherhalf-hour，ashisotherclientswereclamoringtobeserved。Soyouatewhatwasbeforeyouinsulkydisgust，andgotoutoftheroomasquicklyaspossible。

Afteroneofthesegastronomicraces，beinghungry，flustered，andsufferingfromindigestion，IaskedminehostifithadneveroccurredtohimtoserveaTABLED"HOTEdinner(incourses)asisdoneabroad，wherehundredsofpeopledineatthesamemoment，eachdishbeingofferedtheminturnaccompaniedbyitsaccessories。

"Ofcourse，Ihavethoughtofit，"heanswered。"ItwouldbethegreatestimprovementthatcouldbeintroducedintoAmericanhotel-

keeping。NooneknowsbetterthanIdohowdisastrousthepresentsystemistoallparties。Takeasanexampleofthepresentway，thedinnerIamgoingtogiveyouto-morrow，inhonorofChristmas。

GlanceoverthisMENU。Youwillseethatitenumerateseverycostlyanddelicatearticleoffoodpossibletoprocureandalonglistofotherdishes，thegreaterpartofwhichwillnotevenbecalledfor。AsnonumberofCHEFScouldpossiblyoverseetheproperpreparationofsuchavarietyofmeatsandsauces，allwillbecarelesslycooked，andasyouknowbyexperience，poorlyserved。

"Peoplewhoexactuselessvariety，"headded，"aresureinsomewaytobethesufferers；intheiranxietytotryeverything，theywillgetnothingwortheating。Yetthatmealwillcostmeconsiderablymorethanmyguestspayfortheirtwenty-fourhours"boardandlodging。"

"Whydoit，youask？Becauseitisthecustom，andbecauseitwillbeanadvertisement。Thesebillsoffarewillbesownbroadcastoverthecountryinletterstofriendsandkeptassouvenirs。If，insteadofallthissenselesssuperfluity，IwereallowedtogiveaTABLED"HOTEmealto-morrow，withtheCHEFIhave，Icouldprovideanexquisitedinner，perfectineverydetail，servedatlittletablesasdeftlyandsilentlyasinaprivatehouse。Icouldalsodischargehalfofmywaiters，andchargetwodollarsadayinsteadoffivedollars，andthehotelwouldbecome(whatithasneverbeenyet)apayinginvestment，sogreatwouldhethesaving。"

"Onlythismorning，"hecontinued，warmingtohissubject，"whilestandinginthediningroom，IsawayoungmanorderandthensendawayhalfthedishesontheMENU。Achickenwasbroiledforhimandrejected；asteakandanomelettefarednobetter。Howmuchdoyousupposeahotelgainsfromaguestlikethat？"

"ThereasonAmericansputupwithsuchpoorviandsinhotelsis，thathomecookinginthiscountryissorudimentary，consistingprincipallyoffrieddishes，andhotbreads。Solittleisknownabouttheproperpreparationoffoodthattomorrow"sdinnerwillappeartomanyastheNEPLUSULTRAofdelicateliving。Oneofthecharmsofahotelforpeoplewholivepoorlyathome，liesinthispowertoorderexpensivedishestheyrarelyorneverseeontheirowntables。"

"TobeservedwithaquantityoffoodthathehasbutlittledesiretoeatisoneofanAmericancitizen"sdearestprivileges，andarighthewillmostunwillinglyrelinquish。HemayknowaswellasyouandIdo，thatwhathecallsforwillnotbewortheating；thatisofsecondaryimportance，hehasitbeforehim，andiscontented。"

"ThehotelthatattemptedlimitingthelibertyofitsgueststotheextentofservingthemaTABLED"HOTEdinner，wouldbeemptiedinaweek。"

"Acrowningincongruity，asmostpeoplearedelightedtodinewithfriends，oratpublicfunctions，wherethemealisinvariablyservedALARUSSE(anothernameforaTABLED"HOTE)，andontheseoccasionsareonlytoogladtohavetheirMENUchosenforthem。

Thepresentway，however，isaremnantof"oldtimes"andtheaverageAmerican，withallhisloveofchangeandnovelty，isveryconservativewhenitcomestohistable。"

Whatthismanagerdidnotconfidetome，butwhatIdiscoveredlaterformyself，wasthattofacilitatetheservice，andavoidconfusioninthekitchens，ithadbecomethecustomatallthelargeandmostofthesmallhotelsinthiscountry，tocarvethejoints，cutupthegame，andportionoutvegetables，anhourortwobeforemealtime。Thefood，thusarranged，isplacedinvaststeamclosets，whereitsimmersgaylyforhours，initsown，andfiftyothervapors。

Anyonewhoknowstherudimentsofcookery，willrecognizethatwiththissystemnoviandcanhaveanyparticularflavor，thepartridgeshavingatasteoftheirneighbortheroastbeef，whichinturnsuggeststheplumpuddingithasbeen"chumming"with。

Itisnotaloneinahotelthatwemissthegoodingraspingafterthebetter。Smallhousekeepingisapparentlyrunonthesamelines。

AyoungFrenchman，whowasworkinginmyrooms，toldmeinreplytoaquestionregardingprices，thateverykindoffoodwascheaperherethanabroad，buttheprejudiceagainstcertaindisheswassostronginthiscountrythatmanyofthebestthingsinthemarketswerenevercalledfor。Ournationisnolongerinits"teens"andshouldceasetoactlikeafoolishboywhohasinherited(whatappearstohim)alimitlessfortune；notforfearofhiscoming，likehisprototypeintheparable，toliveon"husks"forheisdoingthatalready，butlestlikethedogofthefable，ingraspingaftertheshadowofabanquethemissthesimplemealthatiswithinhisreach。

Oneofthereasonsforthisdeplorablestateofaffairsliesinthefoolisheducationourgirlsreceive。Theylearnsolittlehousekeepingathome，thatwhenmarriedtheyareobligedtobeginalloveragain，unlesstheyprefer，likeamajorityoftheirfriends，toletthingsasgoatthewillanddiscretionofthe"lady"belowstairs。

AtbothhotelsIhavereferredto，thefamiliesofthemeninterestedconsidereditbeneaththemtoknowwhatwastakingplace。The"daughter"oftheNewEnglandhousewentsemi-weeklytoBostontotakeviolinlessonsattendollarseach，althoughshehadnointentionofbecomingaprofessional，whilethewifewrotepoetryandignoredthehotelsideofherlifeentirely。

The"betterhalf"oftheFloridaestablishmenthiredapalaceinRomeandentertainedambassadors。Hotelsdividedagainstthemselvesareapttobeestablishmentswhereyoupayforriotouslivingandareservedonlywithhusks。

Wehavemanyhardlessonsaheadofus，andoneofthehardestwillbeforournationtolearnhumblyfromthethriftyemigrantsonourshores，thegreatartofutilizingthe"tails"thatareatthismomentbeingsorecklesslythrownaway。

Asitis，inspiteofmarketsoverflowingwitheveryfish，vegetable，andtemptingviand，wecontinuetobetheworstfed，mostmeagrelynourishedofallthewealthynationsonthefaceoftheearth。

Wehaveasaying(foranexcellentreasonunknownontheContinent)thatProvidenceprovidesuswithfoodandthedevilsendsthecooks!Itwouldbetruertosaythatthepoorerthefoodresourcesofanation，themorerestrictedthechoiceofmaterial，thebetterthecooks；asmalllatitudewhenprovidingforthetableforcingthemtoahundredclevercombinationsandmysteriousdevicestovarythemonotonyoftheircuisineandtemptapalate，bycustomstaled。

Ourheedlesspeople，withgreatvarietyattheirdisposition，areunequaltothesituation，wastinganddiscardingthebest，andmakingabsolutelynothingoftheiradvantages。

Ifwewereenjoyingourprodigalitybylivingonthefatoftheland，therewouldbelessreasontoreproachourselves，foreveryonehasarighttoliveashepleases。Butasitis，ourfoolishprodigalsarespendingtheirsubstance，whileeatingthehusks!

CHAPTER30-TheFaubourgofSt。GermainTHEREhasbeentoomuchsaidandwritteninthelastdozenyearsaboutbreakingdownthe"greatwall"behindwhichthearistocratsofthefamousFaubourg，liketheCelestials，theirprototypes，haveensconcedthemselves。TheChinesespeakofoutsidersas"barbarians。"TheFrenchladiesrefertosuchunfortunatesasbeing"beyondthepale。"Almostallthathasbeenwrittenisarrantnonsense；thatimaginarybarrierexiststo-dayonasfirmafoundation，andisguardedbysentinelsasvigilantaswhen，fortyyearsago，Napoleon(thirdofthename)andhisSpanishspousemountedtoitsassault。

TheirrepulsewasabitterhumiliationtothePARVENUEEmpress，whoseresentmenttooktheform(alongwithmanyothercuriousresults)ofopeningthepresentBoulevardSt。Germain，itslinebeingintentionallycarriedthroughtheheartofthatquarter，teemingwithhistoric"Hotels"oftheoldaristocracy，wherebeautifulconstructionsweremercilesslytorndowntomakewayforthenewavenue。ThecajolerieswhichEugeniefirsttriedandtheblowsthatfollowedwerealikeunavailing。EvenherworshipofMarieAntoinette，betweenwhomandherselfshefoundimaginaryresemblances，failedtowarmthestonyheartsoftheproudoldladies，towhomitwasasgallandwormwoodtoseeanobodycrownedinthepalaceoftheirkings。Likereligiouscommunities，persecutiononlydrewthisoldsocietymorefirmlytogetherandmadethemstandbyeachotherintheirdistress。WhentheBoiswasremodelledbyNapoleonandthelakewithitswindingdrivelaidout，thenewCourtdroveofanafternoonalongthiswaterfront。

Thatwasenoughfortheoldswells!Theyretiredtotheremote"AlleeoftheAcacias，"andsolemnlytooktheirairingawayfromthebustleofthenewworld，incidentallysettingafashionthathasheldgoodtothisday；thelakesidebeingnowdeserted，andthe"Acacias"crowdedofanafternoon，byallthatParisholdsofelegantandinelegant。

WherethebrilliantSecondEmpirefailed，theRepublichadlittlechanceofsuccess。Witheachsucceedingyearthe"OldFaubourg"