第6章

Hoopdriverdrewhiswatchhastily。"Isay，"saidMr。Hoopdriver，showingittoher，"don’tyouthinkweoughttobegettingon？"

Hisfacewasflushed，hisearsbrightred。Sheascribedhisconfusiontomodesty。Herosewithalionaddedtotheburthensofhisconscience，andheldouthishandtoassisther。TheywalkeddownintoCoshamagain，resumedtheirmachines，andwentonataleisurelypacealongthenorthernshoreofthebigharbour。ButMr。Hoopdriverwasnolongerhappy。Thishorrible，thisfulsomelie，stuckinhismemory。WhyHADhedoneit？ShedidnotaskforanymoreSouthAfricanstories，happily——atleastuntilPorchesterwasreached——buttalkedinsteadofLivingOne’sOwnLife，andhowcustomhungonpeoplelikechains。Shetalkedwonderfully，andsetHoopdriver’smindfermenting。BytheCastle，Mr。Hoopdrivercaughtseveralcrabsinlittleshorepools。AtFarehamtheystoppedforasecondtea，andlefttheplacetowardsthehourofsunset，undersuchinvigoratingcircumstancesasyoushallinduecoursehear。

THERESCUEEXPEDITION

XXX

Andnowtotellofthoseenergeticchevaliers，Widgery，Dangle，andPhipps，andofthatdistressedbeauty，’ThomasPlantagenet，’

wellknowninsociety，sotheparagraphssaid，asMrs。Milton。WeleftthematMidhurststation，ifIrememberrightly，waiting，inastateoffineemotion，fortheChichestertrain。ItwasclearlyunderstoodbytheentireRescuePartythatMrs。Miltonwasbearingupbravelyagainstalmostoverwhelminggrief。Thethreegentlemenoutdidoneanotherinsympatheticexpedients;theywatchedhergravelyalmosttenderly。ThesubstantialWidgerytuggedathismoustache，andlookedhisunspeakablefeelingsatherwiththosedog—like，browneyesofhis;theslenderDangletuggedatHISmoustache，anddidwhathecouldwithunsympatheticgreyones。Phipps，unhappily，hadnomoustachetorunanyriskswith，sohefoldedhisarmsandtalkedinabrave，indifferent，bearing—uptoneabouttheLondon，Brighton，andSouthCoastRailway，justtocheerthepoorwomanupalittle。AndevenMrs。

Miltonreallyfeltthatexaltedmelancholytotheverybottomofherheart，andtriedtoshowitinadozenlittle，delicate，feminineways。

"ThereisnothingtodountilwegettoChichester，"saidDangle。

"Nothing。"

"Nothing，"saidWidgery，andasideinherear："Youreallyatescarcelyanything，youknow。"

"Theirtrainsarealwayslate，"saidPhipps，withhisfingersalongtheedgeofhiscollar。Dangle，youmustunderstand，wasasub—editorandreviewer，andhispridewastobeThomasPlantagenet’sintellectualcompanion。Widgery，thebigman，wasmanagerofabankandamightygolfer，andhisconceptionofhisrelationstohernevercameintohismindwithoutthosecharmingoldlines，"Douglas，Douglas，tenderandtrue，"fallingharduponitsheels。HisnamewasDouglas—DouglasWidgery。AndPhipps，Phippswasamedicalstudentstill，andhefeltthathelaidhisheartatherfeet，theheartofamanoftheworld。Shewaskindtothemallinherway，andinsistedontheirbeingfriendstogether，inspiteofadispositiontoreciprocalcriticismtheydisplayed。DanglethoughtWidgeryaPhilistine，appreciatingbutcoarselythemeritsof"ASoulUntrammelled，"andWidgerythoughtDanglelacked，humanity——wouldtalkinsincerelytosayacleverthing。BothDangleandWidgerythoughtPhippsabitofacub，andPhippsthoughtbothDangleandWidgeryacoupleofThunderingBounders。

"TheywouldhavegottoChichesterintimeforlunch，"saidDangle，inthetrain。"After，perhaps。Andthere’snosufficientplaceintheroad。Sosoonaswegetthere，Phippsmustinquireatthechiefhotelstoseeifanyoneansweringtoherdescriptionhaslunchedthere。"

"Oh，I’LLinquire，"saidPhipps。"Willingly。IsupposeyouandWidgerywilljusthangabout——"

HesawanexpressionofpainonMrs。Milton’sgentleface，andstoppedabruptly。

"No，"saidDangle，"weshan’tHANGABOUT，asyouputit。TherearetwoplacesinChichesterwheretouristsmightgo——thecathedralandaremarkablyfinemuseum。Ishallgotothecathedralandmakeaninquiryorso，whileWidgery——"

"Themuseum。Verywell。Andafterthatthere’salittlethingortwoI’vethoughtofmyself，"saidWidgery。

TobeginwiththeytookMrs。MiltoninakindofprocessiontotheRedHotelandestablishedhertherewithsometea。"Youaresokindtome，"shesaid。"Allofyou。"Theysignifiedthatitwasnothing，anddispersedtotheirinquiries。Bysixtheyreturned，theirzealalittledamped，withoutnews。WidgerycamebackwithDangle。Phippswasthelasttoreturn。"You’requitesure，"saidWidgery，thatthereisn’tanyflawinthatinferenceofyours？"

"Quite，"saidDangle，rathershortly。

"Ofcourse，"saidWidgery，"theirstartingfromMidhurstontheChichesterroaddoesn’tabsolutelybindthemnottochangetheirminds。"

"Mydearfellow！——Itdoes。Reallyitdoes。Youmustallowmetohaveenoughintelligencetothinkofcross—roads。Reallyyoumust。Therearen’tanycross—roadstotemptthem。Wouldtheyturnasidehere？No。Wouldtheyturnthere？Manymorethingsareinevitablethanyoufancy。"

"Weshallseeatonce，"saidWidgery，atthewindow。"HerecomesPhipps。Formyownpart——"

"Phipps！"saidMrs。Milton。"Ishehurrying？Doeshelook——"Sheroseinhereagerness，bitinghertremblinglip，andwenttowardsthewindow。

"Nonews，"saidPhipps，entering。

"Ah！"saidWidgery。

"None？"saidDangle。

"Well，"saidPhipps。"Onefellowhadgotholdofaqueerstoryofamaninbicyclingclothes，whowasaskingthesamequestionaboutthistimeyesterday。"

"Whatquestion？"saidMrs。Milton，intheshadowofthewindow。

Shespokeinalowvoice，almostawhisper。

"Why——Haveyouseenayoungladyinagreybicyclingcostume？"

Danglecaughtathislowerlip。"What’sthat？"hesaid。

"Yesterday！Amanaskingafterherthen！WhatcanTHATmean？"

"Heavenknows，"saidPhipps，sittingdownwearily。"You’dbetterinfer。"

"Whatkindofman？"saidDangle。

"HowshouldIknow？——inbicyclingcostume，thefellowsaid。"

"Butwhatheight？——Whatcomplexion？"

"Didn’task，"saidPhipps。"DIDN’TASK！Nonsense，"saidDangle。

"Askhimyourself，"saidPhipps。"He’sanostlerchapintheWhiteHart，——short，thick—setfellow，witharedfaceandacrustymanner。Leaningupagainstthestabledoor。Smellsofwhiskey。Goandaskhim。"

"Ofcourse，"saidDangle，takinghisstrawhatfromtheshadeoverthestuffedbirdonthechiffonierandturningtowardsthedoor。"Imighthaveknown。"

Phipps’mouthopenedandshut。

"You’retired，I’msure，Mr。Phipps，"saidthelady，soothingly。

"Letmeringforsometeaforyou。"ItsuddenlyoccurredtoPhippsthathehadlapsedalittlefromhischivalry。"Iwasalittleannoyedatthewayherushedmetodoallthisbusiness，"

hesaid。"ButI’ddoahundredtimesasmuchifitwouldbringyouanynearertoher。"Pause。"IWOULDlikealittletea。"

"Idon’twanttoraiseanyfalsehopes，"saidWidgery。"ButIdoNOTbelievetheyevencametoChichester。Dangle’saverycleverfellow，ofcourse，butsometimestheseInferencesofhis——"

"Tchak！"saidPhipps，suddenly。

"Whatisit？"saidMrs。Milton。

"SomethingI’veforgotten。Iwentrightoutfromhere，wenttoeveryotherhotelintheplace，andneverthought——Butnevermind。I’llaskwhenthewaitercomes。"

"Youdon’tmean——"Atap，andthedooropened。"Tea，m’m？yes，m’m，"saidthewaiter。

"Oneminute，"saidPhipps。"Wasaladyingrey，acyclinglady——"

"Stoppedhereyesterday？Yessir。Stoppedthenight。Withherbrother，sir——ayounggent。"

"Brother！"saidMrs。Milton，inalowtone。"ThankGod！"

Thewaiterglancedatherandunderstoodeverything。"Ayounggent，sir，"hesaid，"veryfreewithhismoney。GivethenameofBeaumont。"Heproceededtosomeramblingparticulars，andwascross—examinedbyWidgeryontheplansoftheyoungcouple。

"Havant！Where’sHavant？"saidPhipps。"Iseemtorememberitsomewhere。"

"Wasthemantall？"saidMrs。Milton，intently，"distinguishedlooking？withalong，flaxenmoustache？andspokewithadrawl？"

"Well，"saidthewaiter，andthought。"Hismoustache，m’m，wasscarcelylong——scrubbymore，andyounglooking。"

"Aboutthirty—five，hewas？"

"No，m’m。Morelikefiveandtwenty。Notthat。"

"Dearme！"saidMrs。Milton，speakinginacurious，hollowvoice，fumblingforhersalts，andshowingthefinestself—control。"ItmusthavebeenherYOUNGERbrother——musthavebeen。"

"Thatwilldo，thankyou，"saidWidgery，officiously，feelingthatshewouldbeeasierunderthisnewsurpriseifthemanweredismissed。Thewaiterturnedtogo，andalmostcollidedwithDangle，whowasenteringtheroom，pantingexcitedlyandwithapockethandkerchiefheldtohisrighteye。"Hullo！"saiddangle。

"What’sup？"

"What’supwithYOU？"saidPhipps。

"Nothing——analtercationmerelywiththatdrunkenostlerofyours。Hethoughtitwasaplottoannoyhim——thattheYoungLadyinGreywasmythical。Judgedfromyourmanner。I’vegotapieceofrawmeattokeepoverit。Youhavesomenews，Isee？"

"Didthemanhityou？"askedWidgery。

Mrs。MiltonroseandapproachedDangle。"CannotIdoanything？"

Danglewasheroic。"Onlytellmeyournews，"hesaid，roundthecornerofthehandkerchief。

"Itwasinthisway，"saidPhipps，andexplainedrathersheepishly。Whilehewasdoingso，witharunningfireofcommentaryfromWidgery，thewaiterbroughtinatrayoftea。"A

timetable，"saidDangle，promptly，"forHavant。"Mrs。Miltonpouredtwocups，andPhippsandDanglepartookinpassoverform。

Theycaughtthetrainbyahair’sbreadth。SotoHavantandinquiries。

DanglewaspuffeduptofindthathisguessofHavantwasright。

InviewofthefactthatbeyondHavanttheSouthamptonroadhasasteephillcontinuouslyontheright—handside，andtheseaontheleft，hehituponamagnificentschemeforheadingtheyoungfolksoff。HeandMrs。MiltonwouldgotoFareham，WidgeryandPhippsshouldalightoneeachattheintermediatestationsofCoshamandPorchester，andcomeonbythenexttrainiftheyhadnonews。Iftheydidnotcomeon，awiretotheFarehampostofficewastoexplainwhy。ItwasNapoleonic，andmorethanconsoledDanglefortheopenderisionoftheHavantstreetboysatthehandkerchiefwhichstillprotectedhisdamagedeye。

Moreover，theschemeansweredtoperfection。Thefugitivesescapedbyahair’sbreadth。TheywereoutsidetheGoldenAnchoratFareham，andpreparingtomount，asMrs。MiltonandDanglecameroundthecornerfromthestation。"It’sher！"saidMrs。

Milton，andwouldhavescreamed。"Hist！"saidDangle，grippingthelady’sarm，removinghishandkerchiefinhisexcitement，andleavingthepieceofmeatoverhiseye，anextraordinaryappearancewhichseemedunexpectedlytocalmher。"Becool！"saidDangle，glaringunderthemeat。"Theymustnotseeus。Theywillgetawayelse。Werethereflysatthestation？"TheyoungcouplemountedandvanishedroundthecorneroftheWinchesterroad。Haditnotbeenforthepublicityofthebusiness，Mrs。Miltonwouldhavefainted。"SAVEHER！"shesaid。

"Ah！Aconveyance，"saidDangle。"Oneminute。"

Heleftherinamostpatheticattitude，withherhandpressedtoherheart，andrushedintotheGoldenAnchor。Dogcartintenminutes。Emerged。Themeathadgonenow，andonesawthecoolingpuffinessoverhiseye。"Iwillconductyoubacktothestation，"

saidDangle;"hurrybackhere，andpursuethem。YouwillmeetWidgeryandPhippsandtellthemIaminpursuit。"

Shewaswhirledbacktotherailwaystationandleftthere，onahard，blistered，woodenseatinthesun。Shefelttiredanddreadfullyruffledandagitatedanddusty。Danglewas，nodoubt，mostenergeticanddevoted;butforakindly，helpfulmannercommendhertoDouglasWidgery。

MeanwhileDangle，hisfacegoldenintheeveningsun，wasdriving（aswellashecould）alarge，blackhorseharnessedintoathingcalledagig，northwestwardtowardsWinchester。Dangle，barringhisswolleneye，wasarefined—lookinglittleman，andbeworeadeerstalkercapandwasdressedindarkgrey。Hisneckwaslongandslender。Perhapsyouknowwhatgigsare，——huge，big，woodenthingsandveryhighandthehorse，too，washugeandbigandhigh，withknobbylegs，alongface，ahardmouth，andawhackingtrickofpacing。Smack，smack，smack，smackitwentalongtheroad，andhardbythechurchitshiedvigorouslyatahoodedperambulator。

ThehistoryoftheRescueExpeditionnowbecomesconfused。ItappearsthatWidgerywasextremelyindignanttofindMrs。MiltonleftaboutupontheFarehamplatform。Thedayhadirritatedhimsomehow，thoughhehadstartedwiththenoblestintentions，andheseemedgladtofindanoutletforjustifiableindignation。

"He’ssuchaspasmodiccreature，"saidWidgery。"Rushingoff！AndIsupposewe’retowaithereuntilhecomesback！It’slikely。

He’ssoegotistical，isDangle。Alwayswantstomismanageeverythinghimself。"

"Hemeanstohelpme，"saidMrs。Milton，alittlereproachfully，touchinghisarm。Widgerywashardlyinthemoodtobemollifiedallatonce。"HeneednotpreventME，"hesaid，andstopped。

"It’snogoodtalking，youknow，andyouaretired。"

"Icangoon，"shesaidbrightly，"ifonlywefindher。""WhileIwascoolingmyheelsinCoshamIboughtacountymap。"Heproducedandopenedit。"Here，yousee，istheroadoutofFareham。"HeproceededwiththecalmdeliberationofabusinessmantodevelopaproposaloftakingtrainforthwithtoWinchester。"TheyMUSTbegoingtoWinchester，"heexplained。Itwasinevitable。To—morrowSunday，Winchesteracathedraltown，roadgoingnowhereelseoftheslightestimportance，"ButMr。Dangle？"

"Hewillsimplygoonuntilhehastopasssomething，andthenhewillbreakhisneck。IhaveseenDangledrivebefore。It’sscarcelylikelyadog—cart，especiallyahireddog—cart，willovertakebicyclesinthecooloftheevening。Relyuponme，Mrs。

Milton——"

"Iaminyourhands，"shesaid，withpatheticlittleness，lookingupathim，andforthemomentheforgottheexasperationoftheday。

Phipps，duringthisconversation，hadstoodinasomewhatdepressedattitude，leaningonhisstick，feelinghiscollar，andlookingfromonespeakertotheother。TheideaofleavingDanglebehindseemedtohimanexcellentone。"Wemightleaveamessageattheplacewherehegotthedog—cart，"hesuggested，whenhesawtheireyesmeeting。Therewasacheerfulalacrityaboutallthreeattheproposal。

ButtheynevergotbeyondBotley。Forevenastheirtrainranintothestation，amightyrumblingwasheard，therewasashoutingoverhead，theguardstoodastonishedontheplatform，andPhipps，thrustinghisheadoutofthewindow，cried，"Therehegoes！"andsprangoutofthecarriage。Mrs。Milton，followinginalarm，justsawit。FromWidgeryitwashidden。Botleystationliesinacutting，overheadwastheroadway，andacrossthelemonyellowsandflushedpinksofthesunset，therewhirledagreatblackmass，ahorselikealong—nosedchessknight，theupperworksofagig，andDangleintransitfromfronttoback。A

monstrousshadowapedhimacrossthecutting。Itwastheeventofasecond。Dangleseemedtojump，hangintheairmomentarily，andvanish，andafteramoment’spausecameaheart—rendingsmash。

Thentwoblackheadsrunningswiftly。

"Bettergetout，"saidPhippstoMrs。Milton，whostoodfascinatedinthedoorway。

Inanothermomentallthreewerehurryingupthesteps。TheyfoundDangle，hatless，standingupwithcuthandsextended，havinghishandsbrushedbyanofficioussmallboy。Abroad，uglyroadrandownhillinalongvista，andinthedistancewasalittlegroupofBotleyinhabitantsholdingthebig，blackhorse。

Evenatthatdistancetheycouldseetheexpressionofconsciousprideonthemonster’svisage。Itwasaswooden—facedahorseasyoucanimagine。ThebeastsintheTowerofLondon，onwhichthemeninarmourareperched，aretheonlyhorsesIhaveeverseenatalllikeit。However，wearenotconcernednowwiththehorse，butwithDangle。"Hurt？"askedPhipps，eagerly，leading。

"Mr。Dangle！"criedMrs。Milton，claspingherhands。

"Hullo！"saidDangle，notsurprisedintheslightest。"Gladyou’vecome。Imaywantyou。BitofamessI’min——eigh？ButI’vecaught’em。AttheveryplaceIexpected，too。"

"Caughtthem！"saidWidgery。Wherearethey？"

"Upthere，"hesaid，withabackwardmotionofhishead。"Aboutamileupthehill。Ileft’em。IHADto。"

"Idon’tunderstand，"saidMrs。Milton，withthatrapt，painfullookagain。"HaveyoufoundJessie？"

"Ihave。IwishIcouldwashthegraveloutofmyhandssomewhere。Itwaslikethis，youknow。Cameonthemsuddenlyroundacorner。Horseshiedatthebicycles。Theyweresittingbytheroadsidebotanisingflowers。Ijusthadtimetoshout，’JessieMilton，we’vebeenlookingforyou，’andthenthatconfoundedbrutebolted。Ididn’tdareturnround。Ihadallmyworktodotosavemyselfbeingturnedover，asitwas——solongasIdid，Imean。Ijustshouted，’Returntoyourfriends。Allwillbeforgiven。’AndoffIcame，clatter，clatter。Whethertheyheard——"

"TAKEMETOHER，"saidMrs。Milton，withintensity，turningtowardsWidgery。

"Certainly，"saidWidgery，suddenlybecomingactive。"Howfarisit，Dangle？"

"Mileandahalfortwomiles。Iwasdeterminedtofindthem，youknow。Isaythough——Lookatmyhands！ButIbegyourpardon，Mrs。

Milton。"HeturnedtoPhipps。"Phipps，Isay，whereshallIwashthegravelout？Andhavealookatmyknee？"

"There’sthestation，"saidPhipps，becominghelpful。Danglemadeastep，andadamagedkneebecameevident。"Takemyarm，"saidPhipps。

"Wherecanwegetaconveyance？"askedWidgeryoftwosmallboys。

Thetwosmallboysfailedtounderstand。Theylookedatoneanother。

"There’snotacab，notago—cart，insight，"saidWidgery。"It’sacaseofahorse，ahorse，mykingdomforahorse。"

"There’saharseallright，"saidoneofthesmallboyswithamovementofthehead。

"Don’tyouknowwherewecanhiretraps？askedWidgery。"Oracartor——anything？"askedMrs。Milton。

"JohnOoker’sgartacart，butnoonecan’t’ire’n，"saidthelargerofthesmallboys，partiallyavertinghisfaceandstaringdowntheroadandmakingasongofit。"Andso’smyfeyther，for’slegusbroke。"

"Notacarteven！Evidently。Whatshallwedo？"

ItoccurredtoMrs。MiltonthatifWidgerywasthemanforcourtlydevotion，Danglewasinfinitelyreadierofresource。"I

suppose——"shesaid，timidly。"PerhapsifyouweretoaskMr。

Dangle——"

AndthenallthegiltcameoffWidgery。Heansweredquiterudely。

"ConfoundDangle！Hasn’themessedusupenough？Hemustneedsdriveaftertheminatraptotellthemwe’recoming，andnowyouwantmetoaskhim——"

Herbeautifulblueeyeswerefilledwithtears。Hestoppedabruptly。"I’llgoandaskDangle，"hesaid，shortly。"Ifyouwishit。"Andwentstridingintothestationanddownthesteps，leavingherintheroadunderthequietinspectionofthetwolittleboys，andwithakindofballadrefrainrunningthroughherhead，"WherearetheKnightsoftheOldenTime？"andfeelingtiredtodeathandhungryanddustyandoutofcurl，and，inshort，amartyrwoman。

XXXI

Itgoestomyhearttotelloftheendofthatday，howthefugitivesvanishedintoImmensity;howtherewerenomoretrainshowBotleystaredunsympatheticallywithapalpabledispositiontoderision，denyingconveyanceshowthelandlordoftheHeronwassuspicious，howthenextdaywasSunday，andthehotsummer’sdayhadcrumpledthecollarofPhippsandstainedtheskirtsofMrs。Milton，anddimmedtheradiantemotionsofthewholeparty。

Dangle，withsticking—plasterandablackeye，felttheabsurdityoftheposeoftheWoundedKnight，andabandoneditafterthefaintestefforts。Recriminationsnever，perhaps，heldtheforegroundofthetalk，buttheyplayedlikesummerlightningontheedgeoftheconversation。Anddeepintheheartsofallwasagallingsenseoftheridiculous。Jessie，theythought，wasmosttoblame。Apparently，too，theworst，whichwouldhavemadethewholebusinesstragic，wasnothappening。Herewasayoungwoman——youngwomandoIsay？ameregirl！——hadchosentoleaveacomfortablehomeinSurbiton，andallthedelightsofarefinedandintellectualcircle，andhadrushedoff，trailingusafterher，posinghard，mutuallyjealous，andnowtiredandweather—worn，toflickusoffatlast，meremudfromherwheel，intothisdetestablevillagebeer—houseonaSaturdaynight！Andshehaddoneit，notforLoveandPassion，whichareseriousexcusesonemayrecogniseevenifonemustreprobate，butjustforaFreak，justforafantasticIdea;fornothing，infact，buttheoutragingofCommonSense。Yetwithal，suchwasourrestraint，thatwetalkedofherstillasonemuchmisguided，asonewhoburtheneduswithanxiety，asalambastray，andMrs。

Miltonhavingeaten，continuedtoshowthefinestfeelingsonthematter。

Shesat，Imaymention，inthecushionedbasket—chair，theonlycomfortablechairintheroom，andwesatonincrediblyhard，horsehairthingshavingantimacassarstiedtotheirbacksbymeansoflemon—colouredbows。ItwasdifferentfromthosedearoldtalksatSurbiton，somehow。Shesatfacingthewindow，whichwasopen（thenightwassotranquilandwarm），andthedimlight—

—forwedidnotusethelamp——suitedheradmirably。Shetalkedinavoicethattoldyoushewastired，andsheseemedinclinedtostateacaseagainstherselfinthematterof"ASoulUntrammelled。"Itwassuchaneveningasmightliveinasympatheticmemoir，butitwasalittledullwhileitlasted。

"Ifeel，"shesaid，"thatIamtoblame。IhaveDeveloped。Thatfirstbookofmine——Idonotgobackuponawordofit，mind，butithasbeenmisunderstood，misapplied。"

"Ithas，"saidWidgery，tryingtolooksodeeplysympatheticastobevisibleinthedark。"Deliberatelymisunderstood。"

"Don’tsaythat，"saidthelady。"Notdeliberately。Itryandthinkthatcriticsarehonest。Aftertheirlights。Iwasnotthinkingofcritics。Butshe——Imean——"Shepaused，aninterrogation。

"Itispossible，"saidDangle，scrutinisinghissticking—plaster。

"Iwriteabookandstateacase。IwantpeopletoTHINKasI

recommend，nottoDOasIrecommend。ItisjustTeaching。OnlyI

makeitintoastory。IwanttoTeachnewIdeas，newLessons，topromulgateIdeas。ThenwhentheIdeashavebeenspreadabroad——Thingswillcomeabout。Onlynowitismadnesstoflyinthefaceoftheestablishedorder。BernardShaw，youknow，hasexplainedthatwithregardtoSocialism。Weallknowthattoearnallyouconsumeisright，andthatlivingoninvestedcapitaliswrong。Onlywecannotbeginwhilewearesofew。ItisThoseOthers。"

"Precisely，"saidWidgery。"ItisThoseOthers。Theymustbeginfirst。"

"Andmeanwhileyougoonbanking——"

"IfIdidn’t，someoneelsewould。"

"AndIliveonMr。Milton’sLotionwhileItrytogainafootinginLiterature。"

"TRY！"saidPhipps。"YouHAVEdoneso。"And，"That’sdifferent，"

saidDangle，atthesametime。

"Youaresokindtome。Butinthismatter。OfcourseGeorginaGriffithsinmybooklivedaloneinaflatinParisandwenttolifeclassesandhadmenvisitors，butthenshewasovertwenty—one。"

"Jessicaisonlyseventeen，andgirlishforthat，"saidDangle。

"Italterseverything。Thatchild！Itisdifferentwithawoman。

AndGeorginaGriffithsneverflauntedherfreedom——onabicycle，incountryplaces。Inthiscountry。Whereeveryoneissoparticular。Fancy，SLEEPINGawayfromhome。It’sdreadful——Ifitgetsaboutitspellsruinforher。"

"Ruin，"saidWidgery。

"Nomanwouldmarryagirllikethat，"saidPhipps。

"Itmustbehushedup，"saidDangle。

"Italwaysseemstomethatlifeismadeupofindividuals，ofindividualcases。Wemustweigheachpersonagainsthisorhercircumstances。Generalrulesdon’tapply——"

"Ioftenfeeltheforceofthat，"saidWidgery。"Thosearemyrules。Ofcoursemybooks——"

"It’sdifferent，altogetherdifferent，"saidDangle。"Anoveldealswithtypicalcases。"

"Andlifeisnottypical，"saidWidgery，withimmenseprofundity。

Thensuddenly，unintentionally，beinghimselfmostsurprisedandshockedofanyintheroom，Phippsyawned。Thefailingwasinfectious，andthegatheringhaving，asyoucaneasilyunderstand，talkeditselfweary，dispersedontrivialpretences。

Butnottosleepimmediately。DirectlyDanglewasalonehebegan，withinfinitedisgust，toscrutinisehisdarklingeye，forhewasaneat—mindedlittlemaninspiteofhisenergy。Thewholebusiness——sonearacapture——washorriblyvexatious。Phippssatonhisbedforsometimeexamining，withequaldisgust，acollarhewouldhavethoughtincredibleforSundaytwenty—fourhoursbefore。Mrs。Miltonfella—musingonthemortalityofevenbig，fatmenwithdog—likeeyes，andWidgerywasunhappybecausehehadbeensocrosstoheratthestation，andbecausesofarhedidnotfeelthathehadscoredoverDangle。AlsohewasangrywithDangle。Andallfourofthem，beingsoulslivingverymuchupontheappearancesofthings，hadapainful，mentalmiddledistanceofBotleyderisiveandsuspicious，andaremoterbackgroundofLondonhumorous，andSurbitonspeculative。Weretheyreally，afterall，behavingabsurdly？

MR。HOOPDRIVER，KNIGHTERRANT

XXXII

AsMr。Danglebadwitnessed，thefugitiveshadbeenleftbyhimbythesideoftheroadabouttwomilesfromBotley。BeforeMr。

Dangle’sappearance，Mr。Hoopdriverhadbeenlearningwithgreatinterestthatmereroadsideflowershadnames，——star—flowers，wind—stars，St。John’swort，willowherb，lordsandladies，bachelor’sbuttons，——mostcuriousnames，someofthem。"TheflowersarealldifferentinSouthAfrica，y’know，"hewasexplainingwithahappyflukeofhisimaginationtoaccountforhisignorance。Thensuddenly，heraldedbyclatteringsoundsandagrideofwheels，Danglehadflaredandthunderedacrossthetranquillityofthesummerevening;Dangle，swayingandgesticulatingbehindacorybanticblackhorse，hadhailedJessiebyhername，hadbackedtowardsthehedgefornoostensiblereason，andvanishedtotheaccomplishmentoftheFatethathadbeenwrittendownforhimfromtheverybeginningofthings。

JessieandHoopdriverhadscarcelytimetostandupandseizetheirmachines，beforethistumultuous，thisswiftandwonderfulpassingofDanglewasachieved。Hewentfromsidetosideoftheroad，——worseeventhantheridingforthofMr。Hoopdriveritwas，——andvanishedroundthecorner。

"Heknewmyname，"saidJessie。"Yes——itwasMr。Dangle。"

"Thatwasourbicyclesdidthat，"saidMr。Hoopdriversimultaneously，andspeakingwithacertaincomplacentconcern。

"Ihopehewon’tgethurt。"

"ThatwasMr。Dangle，"repeatedJessie，andMr。Hoopdriverheardthistime，withaviolentstart。Hiseyebrowswentupspasmodically。

"What！someoneyouknow？"

"Yes。"

"Lord！"

"Hewaslookingforme，"saidJessie。"Icouldsee。Hebegantocalltomebeforethehorseshied。Mystepmotherhassenthim。"

Mr。Hoopdriverwishedhehadreturnedthebicycleafterall，forhisideaswerestillalittlehazyaboutBechamelandMrs。

Milton。HonestyISthebestpolicy——often，hethought。Heturnedhisheadthiswayandthat。Hebecameactive。"Afterus，eigh？

Thenhe’llcomeback。He’sgonedownthathill，andhewon’tbeabletopullupforabit，I’mcertain。"

Jessie，hesaw，hadwheeledhermachineintotheroadandwasmounting。StillstaringatthecornerthathadswallowedupDangle，Hoopdriverfollowedsuit。Andso，justasthesunwassetting，theybegananotherflighttogether，——ridingnowtowardsBishopsWaltham，withMr。Hoopdriverinthepostofdanger——therear——everandagainlookingoverhisshoulderandswervingdangerouslyashedidso。OccasionallyJessiehadtoslackenherpace。Hebreathedheavily，andhatedhimselfbecausehismouthfellopen，Afternearlyanhour’shardriding，theyfoundthemselvesuncaughtatWinchester。NotatraceofDanglenoranyotherdangerwasvisibleastheyrodeintothedusky，yellow—litstreet。ThoughthebatshadbeenflutteringbehindthehedgesandtheeveningstarwasbrightwhiletheywerestilltwomilesfromWinchester，Mr。Hoopdriverpointedoutthedangersofstoppinginsuchanobviousabiding—place，andgentlybutfirmlyinsisteduponreplenishingthelampsandridingontowardsSalisbury。FromWinchester，roadsbranchineverydirection，andtoturnabruptlywestwardwasclearlythewaytothrowoffthechase。AsHoopdriversawthemoonrisingbroadandyellowthroughthetwilight，hethoughtheshouldrevivetheeffectofthatrideoutofBognor;butsomehow，albeitthemoonandalltheatmosphericeffectswerethesame，theemotionsweredifferent。Theyrodeinabsolutesilence，andslowlyaftertheyhadclearedtheoutskirtsofWinchester。Bothofthemwerenownearlytiredout，——thelevelwastedious，andevenalittlehillaburden;andsoitcameaboutthatinthehamletofWallenstocktheywerebeguiledtostopandaskforaccommodationinanexceptionallyprosperouslookingvillageinn。Aplausiblelandladyrosetotheoccasion。

Now，astheypassedintotheroomwheretheirsupperswereprepared，Mr。Hoopdrivercaughtaglimpsethroughadoorajarandfloatinginareekofsmoke，ofthreeandahalffaces——fortheedgeofthedoorcutonedown——andanAmericancloth—coveredtablewithseveralglassesandatankard。Andhealsoheardaremark。Inthesecondbeforeheheardthatremark，Mr。Hoopdriverhadbeenaproudandhappyman，toparticularize，abaronet’sheirincognito。Hehadsurrenderedtheirbicyclestotheoddmanoftheplacewithinfiniteeasydignity，andhadbowinglyopenedthedoorforJessie。"Who’sthat，then？"heimaginedpeoplesaying;andthen，"Some’nprettywellorf——judgebythebicycles。"Thentheimaginaryspectatorswouldfalla—talkingofthefashionablenessofbicycling，——howjudgesAndstockbrokersandactressesand，infact，allthebestpeoplerode，andhowthatitwasoftenthefancyofsuchgreatfolktoshunthebighotels，theadulationofurbancrowds，andseek，incognito，thecosyquaintnessesofvillagelife。Then，maybe，theywouldthinkofacertainnamelessairofdistinctionabouttheladywhohadsteppedacrossthedoorway，andaboutthehandsome，flaxen—moustached，blue—eyedCavalierwhohadfollowedherin，andtheywouldlookonetoanother。"Tellyouwhatitis，"oneofthevillageelderswouldsay——justastheydoinnovels——voicingthethoughtofall，inalow，impressivetone："There’ssuchathinasentertainingbarranetsunawares—nottomentionnohigherthings——"

Such，Isay，hadbeenthefilmy，delightfulstuffinMr。

Hoopdriver’sheadthemomentbeforeheheardthatremark。Buttheremarktoppledhimheadlong。Whatthepreciseremarkwasneednotconcernus。ItwasacasualpieceofsuchsatireasStrephondelightsin。Shouldyoubecurious，dearlady，astoitsnature，youhavemerelytodressyourselfinareallymoderncyclingcostume，getoneofthefeeblest—lookingofyourmentoescortyou，andrideout，nextSaturdayevening，toanypublichousewherehealthy，homelypeoplegathertogether。ThenyouwillhearquitealotofthekindofthingMr。Hoopdriverheard。More，possibly，thanyouwilldesire。

Theremark，Imustadd，implicatedMr。Hoopdriver。Itindicatedanentiredisbeliefinhissocialstanding。Atablow，itshatteredallthegorgeousimaginativefabrichismindhadbeenrejoicingin。Allthatfoolishhappinessvanishedlikeadream。

Andtherewasnothingtoshowforit，asthereisnothingtoshowforanyspitefulremarkthathaseverbeenmade。Perhapsthemanwhosaidthethinghadagleamofsatisfactionattheideaoftakingacomplacent—lookingfooldownapeg，butitisjustaspossiblehedidnotknowatthetimethathisstrayshothadhit。

Hehadthrownitasaboythrowsastoneatabird。Anditnotonlydemolishedafoolish，happyconceit，butitwounded。IttouchedJessiegrossly。

Shedidnothearit，heconcludedfromhersubsequentbearing;

butduringthesuppertheyhadinthelittleprivatedining—room，thoughshetalkedcheerfully，hewaspreoccupied。Whiffsofindistinctconversation，andnowandthenlaughter，cameinfromtheinnparloiirthroughthepelargoniumsintheopenwindow。

Hoopdriverfeltitmustallbeinthesamestrain，——atherexpenseandhis。Heansweredherabstractedly。Shewastired，shesaid，andpresentlywenttoherroom。Mr。Hoopdriver，inhiscourtlyway，openedthedoorforherandbowedherout。Hestoodlisteningandfearingsomenewoffenceasshewentupstairs，androundthebendwherethebarometerhungbeneaththestuffedbirds。Thenhewentbacktotheroom，andstoodonthehearthrugbeforethe。paperfireplaceornament。"Cads！"hesaidinascathingundertone，asafreshburstoflaughtercamefloatingin。Allthroughsupperhehadbeencomposingstingingrepartee，ablisteringspeechofdenunciationtobepresentlydelivered。Hewouldratethemasanoblemanshould："CallthemselvesEnglishmen，indeed，andinsultawoman！"hewouldsay;takethenamesandaddressesperhaps，threatentospeaktotheLordoftheManor，promisetoletthemhearfromhimagain，andsooutwithconsternationinhiswake。Itreallyoughttobedone。

"Teach’embetter，"hesaidfiercely，andtweakedhismoustachepainfully。Whatwasit？Herevivedtheobjectionableremarkforhisownexasperation，andthenwentovertheheadsofhisspeechagain。

Hecoughed，madethreestepstowardsthedoor，thenstoppedandwentbacktothehearthrug。Hewouldn’t——afterall。YetwashenotaKnightErrant？Shouldsuchmengounreproved，unchecked，bywanderingbaronetsincognito？Magnanimity？Lookatitinthatway？Churlsbeneathone’snotice？No;merelyacowardlysubterfuge。HeWOULDafterall。

Somethingwithinhimprotestedthathewasahot—headedassevenashewenttowardsthedooragain。Butheonlywentonthemoreresolutely。Hecrossedthehall，bythebar，andenteredtheroomfromwhichtheremarkhadproceeded。Heopenedthedoorabruptlyandstoodscowlingontheminthedoorway。"You’llonlymakeamessofit，"remarkedtheinternalsceptic。Therewerefivemenintheroomaltogether：afatperson，withalongpipeandagreatnumberofchins，inanarmchairbythefireplace，whowishedMr。Hoopdriveragoodeveningveryaffably;ayoungfellowsmokingacuttyanddisplayingcrossedlegswithgaiters;alittle，beardedmanwithatoothlesslaugh;amiddle—aged，comfortablemanwithbrighteyes，whoworeavelveteenjacket;

andafairyoungman，verygenteelinayellowish—brownready—madesuitandawhitetie。

"H’m，"saidMr。Hoopdriver，lookingverysternandharsh。Andtheninaforbiddingtone，asonewhoconsentedtonoliberties，"Goodevening。"

"Verypleasantdaywe’vebeen’aving，"saidthefairyoungmanwiththewhitetie。

"Very，"saidMr。Hoopdriver，slowly;andtakingabrownarmchair，heplanteditwithgreatdeliberationwherehefacedthefireplace，andsatdown。Let’ssee——howdidthatspeechbegin？

"Verypleasantroadsabouthere，"saidthefairyoungmanwiththewhitetie。

"Very，"saidMr。Hoopdriver，eyeinghimdarkly。Havetobeginsomehow。"Theroadsabouthereareallright，andtheweatherabouthereisallright，butwhatI’vecomeinheretosayis——there’ssomedamnedunpleasantpeople——damnedunpleasantpeople！"

"Oh！"saidtheyoungmanwiththegaiters，apparentlymakingamentalinventoryofhispearlbuttonsashespoke。"How’sthat？"

Mr。Hoopdriverputhishandsonhiskneesandstuckouthiselbowswithextremeangularity。Inhishearthewasravingathisidioticfollyatthusbeardingtheselions，——indisputablytheyWERElions，——buthehadtogothroughwithitnow。Heavensend，hisbreath，whichwasalreadygettingatriflespasmodic，didnotsuddenlygiveout。Hefixedhiseyeonthefaceofthefatmanwiththechins，andspokeinalow，impressivevoice。"Icamehere，sir，"saidMr。Hoopdriver，andpausedtoinflatehischeeks，"withalady。"

"Verynicelady，"saidthemanwiththegaiters，puttinghisheadononesidetoadmireapearlbuttonthathadbeenhidingbehindthecurvatureofhiscalf。"Veryniceladyindeed。"

"Icamehere，"saidMr。Hoopdriver，"withalady。"

"Wesawyoudid，blessyou，"saidthefatmanwiththechins，inacuriouswheezyvoice。"Idon’tseethere’sanythingsoveryextraordinaryinthat。One’udthinkwehadn’teyes。"

Mr。Hoopdrivercoughed。"Icame，here，sir——"

"We’ve’eardthat，"saidthelittlemanwiththebeard，sharplyandwentoffintoanamiablechuckle。"Weknowitby’art，"saidthelittleman，elaboratingthepoint。

Mr。Hoopdrivertemporarilylosthisthread。Heglaredmalignantlyatthelittlemanwiththebeard，andtriedtorecoverhisdiscourse。Apause。

"Youweresaying，"saidthefairyoungmanwiththewhitetie，speakingverypolitely，"thatyoucameherewithalady。"

"Alady，"meditatedthegaitergazer。

Themaninvelveteen，whowaslookingfromonespeakertoanotherwithkeen，brighteyes，nowlaughedasthoughapointhadbeenscored，andstimulatedMr。Hoopdrivertospeak，byfixinghimwithanexpectantregard。

"Somedirtycad，"saidMr。Hoopdriver，proceedingwithhisdiscourse，andsuddenlygrowingextremelyfierce，"madearemarkaswewentbythisdoor。"

"Steadyon！"saidtheoldgentlemanwithmanychins。，Steadyon！

Don’tyougoa—callingusnames，please。"

"Oneminute！"saidMr。Hoopdriver。"Itwasn’tIbegancallingnames。"（"Whodid？saidthemanwiththechins。）"I’mnotcallinganyofyoudirtycads。Don’trunawaywiththatimpression。Onlysomepersoninthisroommadearemarkthatshowedhewasn’tfittowipebootson，and，withallduedeferencetosuchgentlemenasAREgentlemen"（Mr。Hoopdriverlookedroundformoralsupport），"Iwanttoknowwhichitwas。"

"Meanin’？"saidthefairyoungmaninthewhitetie。

"ThatI’mgoingtowipemybootson’imstraightaway，"saidMr。