第5章

"Comeoutintheball，"saidMr。McQuirk。"I

wanttoaskyeropinionoftheweather—onthelevel。"

"Areyoucrazy，sure？"saidAnnieMaria。

"Iam，"saidthe"Tiger。""They’vebeentellingmealldaytherewasspringintheair。Weretheyliars？OramI？"

"Dearme！"saidAnnieMaria——"haven’tyouno—

ticedit？Icanalmostsmelltheviolets。Andthegreengrass。Ofcourse，thereain’tanyyet——it’sjustakindoffeeling，youknow。"

"That’swhatI’mgettingat，"saidMr。McQuirk。

I’vehadit。Ididn’trecognizeitatfirst。I

thoughtmaybeitwasen—wee，contractedtheotherdaywhenIsteppedaboveFourteenthStreet。ButthekatzenjammerI’vegotdon’tspellviolets。Itspellsyerownname，AnnieMaria，andit’syouI

want。IgotoworknextMonday，andImakefourdollarsaday。Spielup，oldgirl——dowemakeateam？"

"Jimmy，"sighedAnnieMaria，suddenlydisap—

pearinginhisovercoat，"don’tyouseethatspringisallovertheworldrightthisminute？"

Butyouyourselfrememberhowthatdayended。

Beginningwithsofineapromiseofvernalthings，lateintheafternoontheairchilledandaninchofsnowfell——evensolateinMarch。OnFifthAve—

nuetheladiesdrewtheirwinterfurscloseaboutthem。Onlyintheflorists’windowscouldbeper—

ceivedanysignsofthemorningsmileofthecominggoddessEastre。

Atsixo’clockHerrLutzbegantoclosehisshop。

Hebeardawell—knownshout："Hello，Dutch！"

"Tiger"McQuirk，inhisshirt—sleeves，withhishatonthebackofhisbead，stoodoutsideinthewhirlingsnow，puffingatablackcigar。

"Donnerwetter！"shoutedLutz，"dervinter，hehasgomebackagainyet！"

"Yeraliar，Dutch，"calledbackMr。McQuirk，withfriendlygeniality，it’sspringtime，bythewatch。"

THEFOOL—KILLER

DownSouthwheneveranyoneperpetratessomeparticularlymonumentalpieceoffoolishnessevery—

bodysays："SendforJesseHolmes。"

JesseHolmesistheFool—Killer。Ofcourseheisamyth，likeSantaClausandJackFrostandGeneralProsperityandallthoseconcreteconceptionsthataresupposedtorepresentanideathatNaturehasfailedtoembody。ThewisestoftheSouthronscan—

nottellyouwhencecomestheFool—Killer’sname;

butfewandhappyarethehouseholdsfromtheRo—

anoketotheRioGrandeinwhichthenameofJesseHolmeshasnotbeenpronouncedorinvoked。Alwayswithasmile，andoftenwithatear，ishesummonedtohisofficialduty。AbusymanisJesseHolmes。

IremembertheclearpictureofhimthathungonthewallsofmyfancyduringmybarefootdayswhenIwasdodginghisoft—threateneddevoirs。Tomebewasaterribleoldman，ingrayclothes，withalong，ragged，graybeard，andreddish，fierceeyes。

Ilookedtoseehimcomestumpinguptheroadinacloudofdust，withawhiteoakstaffinhishandandhisshoestiedwithleatherthongs。Imayyet——

Butthisisastory，notasequel。

Ihavetakennoticewithregret，thatfewstoriesworthreadinghavebeenwrittenthatdidnotcon—

taindrinkofsomesort。Downgothefluids，fromArizonaDick’sthreefingersofredpizentothein—

efficaciousOolongthatnervesLionelMontressortoreparteeinthe"DottyDialogues。"So，insuchgoodcompanyImayintroduceanabsinthedrip——

oneabsinthedrip，drippedthroughasilverdripper，orderly，opalescent，cool，green—eyed——deceptive。

Kernerwasafool。Besidesthat，hewasanartistandmygoodfriend。Now，ifthereisonethingonearthutterlydespicabletoanother，itisanartistintheeyesofanauthorwhosestoryhehasillus—

trated。Justtryitonce。WriteastoryaboutaminingcampinIdiho。Sellit。Spendthemoney，andthen，sixmonthslater，borrowaquarter（oradime），andbuythemagazinecontainingit。Youfindafull—pagewashdrawingofyourhero，BlackBill，thecowboy。Somewhereinyourstoryyouem—

ployedtheword"horse。"Aha！theartisthasgraspedtheidea。BlackBillhasontheregulationtrousersoftheM。F。H。oftheWestchesterCountyHunt。Hecarriesaparlorrifle，andwearsamon—

ocle。InthedistanceisasectionofForty—secondStreetduringasearchforalostgas—pipe，andtheTajMahal，thefamousmausoleuminIndia。

"Enough！IhatedKerner，andonedayImethimandwebecamefriends。Hewasyoungandglori—

ouslymelancholybecausehisspiritsweresohighandlifebadsomuchinstoreforhim。Yes，hewasalmostriotouslysad。Thatwashisyouth。Whenamanbeginstobehilariousinasorrowfulwayyoucanbetamillionthatheisdyeinghishair。Ker—

ner’shairwasplentifulandcarefullymattedasanartist’sthatchshouldbe。Hewasacigaretteur，andbeauditedhisdinnerswithredwine。But，mostofall，bewasafool。And，wisely，Ienviedhim，andlistenedpatientlywhileheknockedVelasquezandTintoretto。Oncehetoldmethathelikedastoryofminethathebadcomeacrossinananthology。Hedescribedittome，andIwassorrythatMr。Fitz—

JamesO’Brienwasdeadandcouldnotlearnoftheeulogyofhiswork。ButmostlyKernermadefewbreaksandwasaconsistentfool。

I’dbetterexplainwhatImeanbythat。Therewasagirl。Now，agirl，asfarasIamconcerned，isathingthatbelongsinaseminaryoranalbum;

butIconcededtheexistenceoftheanimalinordertoretainKerner’sfriendship。Heshowedmeherpictureinalocket——shewasablondeorabrunette——Ihaveforgottenwhich。Sheworkedinafactoryforeightdollarsaweek。Lestfactoriesquotethiswagebywayofvindication，Iwilladdthatthegirlbadworkedforfiveyearstoreachthatsupremeele—

vationofremuneration，beginningat$1。50perweek。

Kerner’sfatherwasworthacoupleofmillionsHewaswillingtostandforart，buthedrewthelineatthefactorygirl。SoKernerdisinheritedhisfatherandwalkedouttoacheapstudioandlivedonsausagesforbreakfastandonFarronifordinner。

Farronihadtheartisticsoulandalineofcreditforpaintersandpoets，nicelyadjusted。SometimesKer—

riersoldapictureandboughtsomenewtapestry，aringandadozensilkcravats，andpaidFarronitwodollarsonaccount。

OneeveningKernerhadmetodinnerwithhimselfandthefactorygirl。TheyweretobemarriedassoonasKernercouldsloshpaintprofitably。Asfortheex—father’stwomillions——pouf！

Shewasawonder。Smallandhalf—waypretty，andasmuchathereaseinthatcheapcafeasthoughshewereonlyinthePalmerHouse，Chicago，withasouvenirspoonalreadysafelyhiddeninhershirtwaist。Shewasnatural。TwothingsInoticedaboutherespecially。Herbeltbucklewasexactlyinthemiddleofherback，andshedidn’ttellusthatalargemanwitharubystick—pinhadfollowedherupallthewayfromFourteenthStreet。WasKernersuchafool？

Iwondered。AndthenIthoughtofthequantityofstripedcuffsandblueglassbeadsthat$2，000，000

canbuyfortheheathen，andIsaidtomyselfthathewas。AndthenElise——certainlythatwashernametoldus，merrily，thatthebrownspotonherwaistwascausedbyherlandladyknockingatthedoorwhileshe（thegirl——confoundtheEnglishlanguage）

washeatinganironoverthegasjet，andshehidtheironunderthebedclothesuntilthecoastwasclear，andtherewasthepieceofchewinggumstucktoitwhenshebegantoironthewaist，and——well，Iwonderedbowintheworldthechewinggumcametobethere——don’ttheyeverstopchewingit？

Awhileafterthat——don’tbeimpatient，theab—

sinthedripiscomingnow——KernerandIwerediningatFarroni’s。Amandolinandaguitarwerebeingattacked;theroomwasfullofsmokeinnice，longcrinklylayersjustliketheartistsdrawthesteamfromaplumpuddingonChristmasposters，andaladyinabluesilkandgasolinedgauntletswasbe—

ginningtobumanairfromtheCatskills。

"Kerner，"saidI，"youareafool。"

"Ofcourse，"saidKerner，"Iwouldn’tlethergoonworking。Notmywife。What’stheusetowait？

She’swilling。IsoldthatwatercolorofthePali—

sadesyesterday。Wecouldcookonatwo—burnergasstove。YouknowtheragoutsIcanthrowtogether？

Yes，Ithinkwewillmarrynextweek。"

"Kerner，"saidI，"youareafool。"

"Haveanabsinthedrip？"saidKerner，grandly。

"To—nightyouaretheguestofArtinpayingquan—

tities。Ithinkwewillgetaflatwithabath。"

"Inevertriedone——Imeananabsinthedrip，"

saidI。

Thewaiterbroughtitandpouredthewaterslowlyovertheiceinthedripper。

"ItlooksexactlyliketheMississippiRiverwaterinthebigbendbelowNatchez，"saidI，fascinated，gazingatthebe—muddleddrip。

"Therearesuchflatsforeightdollarsaweek，"

saidKerner。

"Youareafool，"saidI，andbegantosipthefiltration。"Whatyouneed，"Icontinued，"istheofficialattentionofoneJesseHolmes。"

Kerner，notbeingaSoutherner，didnotcompre—

hend，sohesat，sentimental，figuringonhisflatinhissordid，artisticway，whileIgazedintothegreeneyesofthesophisticatedSpiritofWormwood。

PresentlyInoticedcasuallythataprocessionofbacchanteslimnedonthewallimmediatelybelowtheceilingbadbeguntomove，traversingtheroomfromrighttoleftinagayandspectacularpilgrimage。I

didnotconfidemydiscoverytoKerner。Theartistictemperamentistoohigh—strungtoviewsuchdevia—

tionsfromthenaturallawsoftheartofkalsomining。

Isippedmyabsinthedripandsawedwormwood。

Oneabsinthedripisnotmuch——butIsaidagaintoKerner，kindly：

"Youareafool。"Andthen，inthevernacular：

"JesseHolmesforyours。"

AndthenIlookedaroundandsawtheFool—Killer，ashehadalwaysappearedtomyimagination，sittingatanearbytable，andregardinguswithhisreddish，fatal，relentlesseyes。HewasJesseHolmesfromtoptotoe;hehadthelong，gray，raggedbeard，thegrayclothesofancientcut，theexecutioner’slook，andthedustyshoesofonewhobadbeencalledfromafar。HiseyeswereturnedfixedlyuponKerner。I

shudderedtothinkthatIbadinvokedhimfromhisassiduoussouthernduties。Ithoughtofflying，andthenIkeptmyseat，reflectingthatmanymenbades—

capedhisministrationswhenitseemedthatnothingshortofanappointmentasAmbassadortoSpaincouldsavethemfromhim。IhadcalledmybrotherKernerafoolandwasindangerofhellfire。Thatwasnothing;butIwouldtrytosavehimfromJesseHolmes。

TheFool—Killergotupfromhistableandcameovertoours。Herestedhishandsuponit，andturnedhisburning，vindictiveeyesuponKerner，ig—

noringme。

"Youareahopelessfool，"besaidtotheartist。

"Haven’tyouhadenoughofstarvationyet？Iof—

feryouonemoreopportunity。Giveupthisgirlandcomebacktoyourhome。Refuse，andyoumusttaketheconsequences。"

TheFool—Killer’sthreateningfacewaswithinafootofhisvictim’s;buttomyhorror，Kernermadenottheslightestsignofbeingawareofhispresence。

"Wewillbemarriednextweek，"bemutteredab—

sent—mindedly。"Withmystudiofurnitureandsomesecond—handstuffwecanmakeout。"

"Youhavedecidedyourownfate，"saidtheFool—

Killer，inalowbutterriblevoice。"Youmaycon—

sideryourselfasonedead。Youhavehadyourlastchance。"

"Inthemoonlight，"wentonKerner，softly，"wewillsitundertheskylightwithourguitarandsingawaythefalsedelightsofprideandmoney。"

"Onyourownheadbeit，"hissedtheFool—Killer，andmyscalpprickledwhenIperceivedthatneitherKerner’seyesnorhisearstooktheslightestcog—

nizanceofJesseHolmes。AndthenIknewthatforsomereasontheveilhadbeenliftedformealone，andthatIbadbeenelectedtosavemyfriendfromde—

structionattheFool—Killer’sbands。Somethingofthefearandwonderofitmusthaveshoweditselfinmyface。

"Excuseme，"saidKerner，withhiswan，amiablesmile;"wasItalkingtomyself？Ithinkitisgettingtobeahabitwithme。"

TheFool—KillerturnedandwalkedoutofFar—

ronils。

"Waithereforme，"saidI，rising;"Imustspeaktothatman。Hadyounoanswerforhim？Becauseyouareafoolmustyoudielikeamouseunderhisfoot？Couldyounotutteronesqueakinyourowndefence？

"Youaredrunk，"saidKerner，heartlessly。"Nooneaddressedme。"

"Thedestroyerofyourmind，"saidI，"stoodaboveyoujustnowandmarkedyouforhisvictim。

Youarenotblindordeaf。"

"Irecognizednosuchperson，"saidKerner。"I

haveseennoonebutyouatthistable。Sitdown。

Hereafteryoushallhavenomoreabsinthedrips。"

"Waithere，"saidI，furious;"ifyoudon’tcareforyourownlife，Iwillsaveitforyou。"

Ihurriedoutandovertookthemaningrayhalf—

waydowntheblock。HelookedasIbadseenhiminmyfancyathousandtimes—truculent，grayandawful。Hewalkedwiththewhiteoakstaff，andbutforthestreet—sprinklerthedustwouldhavebeenfly—

ingunderhistread。

Icaughthimbythesleeveandsteeredhimtoadarkangleofabuilding。Iknewhewasamyth，andIdidnotwantacoptoseemeconversingwithva—

cancy，forImightlandinBellevueminusmysilvermatchboxanddiamondring。

"JesseHolmes，"saidI，facinghimwithapparentbravery，"Iknowyou。Ihaveheardofyouallmylife。Iknownowwhatascourgeyouhavebeentoyourcountry。Insteadofkillingfoolsyouhavebeenmurderingtheyouthandgeniusthatarenecessarytomakeapeopleliveandgrowgreat。Youareafoolyourself，Holmes;youbegankillingoffthebrightestandbestofourcountrymenthreegenerationsago，whentheoldandobsoletestandardsofsocietyandhonorandorthodoxywerenarrowandbigoted。YouprovedthatwhenyouputyourmurderousmarkuponmyfriendKerner——thewisestchapIeverknewinmylife。"

TheFool—Killerlookedatmegrimlyandclosely。

"You’veaqueerjag，"saidhe，curiously。"Oh，yes;Iseewhoyouarenow。Youweresittingwithhimatthetable。Well，ifI’mnotmistaken，Iheardyoucallhimafool，too。"

"Idid，"saidI。"Idelightindoingso。Itisfromenvy。Byallthestandardsthatyouknowheisthemostegregiousandgrandiloquentandgorgeousfoolinalltheworld。That’swhyyouwanttokillhim。"

"WouldyoumindtellingmewhoorwhatyouthinkIam？"askedtheoldman。

Ilaughedboisterouslyandthenstoppedsuddenly，forIrememberedthatitwouldnotdotobeseensohilariousinthecompanyofnothingbutabrickwall。

"YouareJesseHolmes，theFool—Killer，"Isaid，solemnly，"andyouaregoingtokillmyfriendKer—

ner。Idon’tknowwhorangyouup，butifyoudokillhimI’llseethatyougetpinchedforit。Thatis，"Iadded，despairingly，"ifIcangetacoptoseeyou。Theyhaveapooreyeformortals，andIthinkitwouldtakethewholeforcetoroundupamythmur—

derer。"

"Well，"saidtheFool—Killer，briskly，"Imustbegoing。Youhadbettergohomeandsleepitoff。

Good—night。"

AtthisIwasmovedbyasuddenfearforKernertoasofterandmorepleadingmood。Ileanedagainstthegrayman’ssleeveandbesoughthim：

"GoodMr。Fool—Killer，pleasedon’tkilllittleKer—

ner。Whycan’tyougobackSouthandkillCon—

gressmenandclay—catersandletusalone？Whydon’tyougouponFifthAvenueandkillmillionairesthatkeeptheirmoneylockedupandwon’tletyoungfoolsmarrybecauseoneof’emlivesonthewrongstreet？Comeandhaveadrink，Jesse。Willyounevergetontoyourjob？"

"Doyouknowthisgirlthatyourfriendhasmadehimselfafoolabout？"askedtheFool—Killer。

"Ihavethehonor，"saidI，"andthat’swhyI

calledKernerafool。Heisafoolbecausehehaswaitedsolongbeforemarryingher。Heisafoolbecausebehasbeenwaitinginthehopesofgettingtheconsentofsomeabsurdtwo—million—dollar—foolparentorsomethingofthesort。"

"Maybe，"saidtheFool—Killer——"maybeI——I

mighthavelookedatitdifferently。WouldyoumindgoingbacktotherestaurantandbringingyourfriendKernerhere？"

"OH，what’stheuse，Jesse，"Iyawned。"Hecan’tseeyou。Hedidn’tknowyouweretalkingtohimatthetable，Youareafictitiouscharacter，youknow。"

"MaybeHecanthistime。Willyougofetchhim？"

"Allright，"saidI，"butI’veasuspicionthatyou’renotstrictlysober，Jesse。Youseemtobewa—

veringandlosingyouroutlines。Don’tvanishbeforeIgetback。"

IwentbacktoKernerandsaid：

"There’samanwithaninvisiblehomicidalmaniawaitingtoseeyououtside。Ibelievehewantstomurderyou。Comealong。Youwon’tseehim，sothere’snothingtobefrightenedabout。"

Kernerlookedanxious。

"Why，"saidbe，"Ihadnoideaoneabsinthewoulddothat。You’dbettersticktoWurzburger。

I’llwalkhomewithyou。"

IledhimtoJesseHolmes’s。

"Rudolf，"saidtheFool—Killer，"I’llgivein。

Bringheruptothehouse。Givemeyourhand，boy。"，"Goodforyou，dad，"saidKerner，shakinghandswiththeoldman。You’llneverregretitafteryouknowher。"

"So，youdidseehimwhenhewastalkingtoyouatthetable？"IaskedKerner。

"Wehadn’tspokentoeachotherinayear，"saidKerner。"It’sallrightnow。"

Iwalkedaway。

"Whereareyougoing？"calledKerner。

"IamgoingtolookforJesseHolmes，"Ian—

swered，withdignityandreserve。

TRANSIENTSINARCADIA

ThereisahotelonBroadwaythathasescapeddiscoverybythesummer—resortpromoters。Itisdeepandwideandcool。Itsroomsarefinishedindarkoakofalowtemperature。Home—madebreezesanddeep—greenshrubberygiveitthedelightswithouttheinconveniencesoftheAdirondacks。Onecanmountitsbroadstaircasesorglidedreamilyupwardinitsaerialelevators，attendedbyguidesinbrassbut—

tons，withaserenejoythatAlpineclimbershaveneverattained。ThereisachefinitskitchenwhowillprepareforyoubrooktroutbetterthantheWhiteMountainseverserved，seafoodthatwouldturnOldPointComfort——"byGad，sah！"——greenwithenvy，andMainevenisonthatwouldmelttheofficialheartofagamewarden。

AfewhavefoundoutthisoasisintheJulydesertofManhattan。Duringthatmonthyouwillseethehotel’sreducedarrayofguestsscatteredluxuriouslyaboutinthecooltwilightof——itsloftydining—room，gazingatoneanotheracrossthesnowywasteofun—

occupiedtables，silentlycongratulatory。

Superfluous，watchful，pneumaticallymovingwait—

ershovernear，supplyingeverywantbeforeitisex—

pressed。ThetemperatureisperpetualApril。Theceilingispaintedinwatercolorstocounterfeitasum—

merskyacrosswhichdelicatecloudsdriftanddonotvanishasthoseofnaturedotoourregret。

Thepleasing，distantroarofBroadwayistrans—

formedintheimaginationofthehappygueststothenoiseofawaterfallfillingthewoodswithitsrestfulsound。Ateverystrangefootstepthegueststurnananxiousear，fearfullesttheirretreatbediscoveredandinvadedbytherestlesspleasure—seekerswhoareforeverhoundingnaturetoherdeepestlairs。

Thusinthedepopulatedcaravansarythelittlebandofconnoisseursjealouslybidethemselvesduringtheheatedseason，enjoyingtotheuttermostthede—

lightsofmountainandseashorethatartandskillhavegatheredandservedtothem。

InthisJulycametothehotelonewhosecardthatshesenttotheclerkforhernametoberegisteredread"Mme。He1oiseD’ArcyBeaumont。"

MadameBeaumontwasaguestsuchastheHotelLotusloved。Shepossessedthefineairofthee1ite，temperedandsweetenedbyacordialgraciousnessthatmadethehotelemployeesherslaves。Bell—boysfoughtforthehonorofansweringherring;theclerks，butforthequestionofownership，wouldhavedeededtoherthehotelanditscontents;theotherguestsregardedherasthefinaltouchoffeminineexclusivenessandbeautythatrenderedtheentourageperfect。

Thissuper—excellentguestrarelyleftthehotel。

Herhabitswereconsonantwiththecustomsofthedis—

criminatingpatronsoftheHotelLotus。Toenjoythatdelectablehostelryonemustforegothecityasthoughitwereleaguesaway。Bynightabriefex—

cursiontothenearbyroofsisinorder;butduringthetorriddayoneremainsintheumbrageousfast—

nessesoftheLotusasatrouthangspoisedinthepel—

lucidsanctuariesofhisfavoritepool。，ThoughaloneintheHotelLotus，MadameBeau—

montpreservedthestateofaqueenwhoselonelinesswasofpositiononly。Shebreakfastedatten，acool，sweet，leisurely，delicatebeingwhoglowedsoftlyinthedimnesslikeajasmineflowerinthedusk。

ButatdinnerwasMadame’sgloryatitsheight。

Sheworeagownasbeautifulandimmaterialasthemistfromanunseencataractinamountaingorge。

Thenomenclatureofthisgownisbeyondtheguessofthescribe。Alwayspale—redrosesreposedagainstitslace—garnishedfront。Itwasagownthatthebead—waiterviewedwithrespectandmetatthedoor。

YouthoughtofPariswhenyousawit，andmaybeofmysteriouscountesses，andcertainlyofVersaillesandrapiersandMrs。Fiskeandrouge—et—noir。TherewasanuntraceablerumorintheHotelLotusthatMadamewasacosmopolite，andthatshewaspullingwithherslenderwhitebandscertainstringsbetweenthenationsinthefavorofRussia。Beingaciti—

zenessoftheworld’ssmoothestroadsitwassmallwonderthatshewasquicktorecognizeintherefinedpurlieusoftheHotelLotusthemostdesirablespotinAmericaforarestfulsojournduringtheheatofmid—

summer。

OnthethirddayofMadameBeaumont’sresidenceinthehotelayoungmanenteredandregisteredhim—

selfasaguest。Hisclothing——tospeakofhispointsinapprovedorder——wasquietlyinthemode;

hisfeaturesgoodandregular;hisexpressionthatofapoisedandsophisticatedmanoftheworld。Hein—

formedtheclerkthathewouldremainthreeorfourdays，inquiredconcerningthesailingofEuropeansteamships，andsankintotheblissfulinanitionofthenonpareilhotelwiththecontentedairofatravellerinhisfavoriteinn。

Theyoungman——nottoquestiontheveracityoftheregister——wasHaroldFarrington。HedriftedintotheexclusiveandcalmcurrentoflifeintheLotussotactfullyandsilentlythatnotaripplealarmedhisfellow—seekersafterrest。HeateintheLotusandofitspatronym，andwaslulledintoblissfulpeacewiththeotherfortunatemariners。InonedayheacquiredhistableandhiswaiterandthefearlestthepantingchasersafterreposethatkeptBroadwaywarmshouldpounceuponanddestroythiscontiguousbutcoverthaven。

AfterdinneronthenextdayafterthearrivalofHaroldFarringtonMadameBeaumontdroppedherhandkerchiefinpassingout。Mr。Farringtonrecov—

eredandreturneditwithouttheeffusivenessofaseekerafteracquaintance。

PerhapstherewasamysticfreemasonrybetweenthediscriminatingguestsoftheLotus。Perhapstheyweredrawnonetoanotherbythefactoftheircommongoodfortuneindiscoveringtheacmeofsum—

merresortsinaBroadwayhotel。Wordsdelicateincourtesyandtentativeindeparturefromformalitypassedbetweenthetwo。And，asifintheexpedientatmosphereofarealsummerresort，anacquaintancegrew，floweredandfructifiedonthespotasdoesthemysticplantoftheconjuror。Forafewmomentstheystoodonabalconyuponwhichthecorridorended，andtossedthefeatheryballofconversation。

"Onetiresoftheoldresorts，"saidMadameBeau—

mont，withafaintbutsweetsmile。"Whatistheusetoflytothemountainsortheseashoretoescapenoiseanddustwhentheverypeoplethatmakebothfollowusthere？"

"Evenontheocean，"remarkedFarrington，sadly，"thePhilistinesbeuponyou。Themostexclusivesteamersaregettingtobescarcelymorethanferryboats。Heavenhelpuswhenthesummerresorterdis—

coversthattheLotusisfurtherawayfromBroadwaythanThousandIslandsorMackinac。"

"Ihopeoursecretwillbesafeforaweek，any—

how，"saidMadame，withasighandasmile。"IdonotknowwhereIwouldgoiftheyshoulddescenduponthedearLotus。Iknowofbutoneplacesode—

lightfulinsummer，andthatisthecastleofCountPolinski，intheUralMountains。"

"IhearthatBaden—BadenandCannesarealmostdesertedthisseason，"saidFarrington。"Yearbyyeartheoldresortsfallindisrepute。Perhapsmanyothers，likeourselves，areseekingoutthequietnooksthatareoverlookedbythemajority。"

"Ipromisemyselfthreedaysmoreofthisdeliciousrest，"saidMadameBeaumont。"OnMondaytheCedricsails。"

HaroldFarrington’seyesproclaimedhisregret。

"ItoomustleaveonMonday，"hesaid，"butIdonotgoabroad。"

MadameBeaumontshruggedoneroundshoulderinaforeigngesture。

"Onecannotbidehereforever，charmingthoughitmaybe。Thechateauhasbeeninpreparationformelongerthanamonth。Thosehousepartiesthatonemustgive——whatanuisance！ButIshallneverfor—

getmyweekintheHotelLotus。"

"NorshallI，"saidFarringtoninalowvoice，andIshallneverforgivetheCedric。"

OnSundayevening，threedaysafterward，thetwosatatalittletableonthesamebalcony。Adiscreetwaiterbroughticesandsmallglassesofclaretcup。

MadameBeaumontworethesamebeautifuleven—

inggownthatshehadworneachdayatdinner。Sheseemedthoughtful。Nearherhandonthetablelayasmallchatelainepurse。Aftershehadeatenhericesheopenedthepurseandtookoutaone—dollarbill。

"Mr。Farrington，"shesaid，withthesmilethathadwontheHotelLotus，"Iwanttotellyousome—

thing。I’mgoingtoleavebeforebreakfastinthemorning，becauseI’vegottogobacktomywork。

I’mbehindthehosierycounteratCasey’sMammothStore，andmyvacation’supateighto’clockto—

morrow。Thatpaper—dollaristhelastcentI’llseetillIdrawmyeightdollarssalarynextSaturdaynight。You’rearealgentleman，andyou’vebeengoodtome，andIwantedtotellyoubeforeIwent。

I’vebeensavingupoutofmywagesforayearjustforthisvacation。IwantedtospendoneweeklikealadyifIneverdoanotherone。IwantedtogetupwhenIpleaseinsteadofhavingtocrawloutatseveneverymorning;andIwantedtoliveonthebestandbewaitedonandringbellsforthingsjustlikerichfolksdo。NowI’vedoneit，andI’vehadthehappiesttimeIeverexpecttohaveinmylife。I’mgoingbacktomyworkandmylittlehallbedroomsatisfiedforanotheryear。Iwantedtotellyouaboutit，Mr。Farrington，becauseI——Ithoughtyoukindoflikedme，andI——Ilikedyou。But，oh，I

couldn’thelpdeceivingyouuptillnow，foritwasalljustlikeafairytaletome。SoItalkedaboutEu—

ropeandthethingsI’vereadaboutinothercountries，andmadeyouthinkIwasagreatlady。

"ThisdressI’vegoton——it’stheonlyoneIhavethat’sfittowear——IboughtfromO’Dowd&Levin—

skyontheinstalmentplan。"

"Seventy—fivedollarsistheprice，anditwasmadetomeasure。Ipaid$10down，andthey’retocollect$1aweektillit’spaidfor。That’llbeaboutallI

havetosay，Mr。Farrington，exceptthatmynameisMamieSiviterinsteadofMadameBeaumont，andI

thankyouforyourattentions。Thisdollarwillpaytheinstalmentdueonthedressto—morrow。IguessI’llgouptomyroomnow。"

HaroldFarringtonlistenedtotherecitaloftheLotus’sloveliestguestwithanimpassivecountenance。

Whenshehadconcludedhedrewasmallbooklikeacheckbookfromhiscoatpocket。Hewroteuponablankforminthiswithastubofpencil，toreouttheleaf，tosseditovertohiscompanionandtookupthepaperdollar。

"I’vegottogotowork，too，inthemorning，"hesaid，"andImightaswellbeginnow。There’sareceiptforthedollarinstalment。I’vebeenacol—

lectorforO’Dowd&Levinskyforthreeyears。

Funny，ain’tit，thatyouandmebothhadthesameideaaboutspendingourvacation？I’vealwayswantedtoputupataswellhotel，andIsavedupoutofmytwentyper，anddidit。Say，Mame，howaboutatriptoConeySaturdaynightontheboatwhat？"

ThefaceofthepseudoMadameHeloiseD’ArcyBeaumontbeamed。

"Oh，youbetI’llgo，Mr。Farrington。ThestoreclosesattwelveonSaturdays。IguessConey’llbeallrightevenifwedidspendaweekwiththeswells。"

BelowthebalconytheswelteringcitygrowledandbuzzedintheJulynight。InsidetheHotelLotusthetempered，coolshadowsreigned，andthesolicitouswaitersingle—footednearthelowwindows，readyatanodtoserveMadameandherescort。

AtthedooroftheelevatorFarringtontookhisleave，andMadameBeaumontmadeherlastascent。

Butbeforetheyreachedthenoiselesscagebesaid：

"Justforgetthat’HaroldFarrington，’willyou？

McManusisthename——JamesMcManus。SomecallmeJimmy。"

"Good—night，Jimmy，"saidMadame。

THERATHSKELLERANDTHEROSE

MissPosieCarringtonhadearnedhersuc—

cess。Shebeganlifehandicappedbythefamilynameof"Boggs，"inthesmalltownknownasCranberryCorners。Attheageofeighteenshehadacquiredthenameof"Carrington"andapositioninthechorusofametropolitanburlesquecompany。

Thenceupwardshehadascendedbythelegitimateanddelectablestepsof"broiler，"memberofthefamous"Dickey—bird"octette，inthesuccessfulmusicalcomedy，"FudgeandFellows，"leaderofthepotato—

bugdancein"Fol—de—Rol，"andatlengthtothepartofthemaid"’Toinette"in"TheKing’sBath—Robe，"

whichcapturedthecriticsandgaveherherchance。

AndwhenwecometoconsiderMissCarringtonsheisintheheydeyofflattery，fameandfizz;andthatastutemanager，HerrTimothyGoldstein，hashersignaturetoiron—cladpapersthatshewillstarthecomingseasoninDydeRich’snewplay，"ParesisbyGaslight。"

PromptlytherecametoHerrTimothyacapabletwentieth—centuryyoungcharacteractorbythenameofHighsmith，whobesoughtengagementas"SolHaytosser，"thecomicandchiefmalecharacterpartin"ParesisbyGaslight。"

"Myboy，"saidGoldstein，"takethepartifyoucangetit。MissCarringtonwon’tlistentoanyofmysuggestions。Shehasturneddownhalfadozenofthebestimitatorsoftheruraldubinthecity。

Shedeclaresshewon’tsetafootonthestageun—

less’Haytosser’isthebestthatcanberakedup——

Shewasraisedinavillage，youknow，andwhenaBroadwayorchidsticksastrawinhishairandtriestocallhimselfacloverblossomshe’son，allright。

Iaskedher，inasarcasticvein，ifshethoughtDen—

manThompsonwouldmakeanykindofashowinthepart。’Oh，no，’saysshe。’Idon’twanthimorJohnDreworJimCorbettoranyoftheseswellactorsthatdon’tknowaturnipfromaturnstile。I

wanttherealarticle。’So，myboy，ifyouwanttoplayI’SolHaytosser’youwillhavetoconvinceMissCarrington。Luckbewithyou。"

HighsmithtookthetrainthenextdayforCran—

berryCorners。Heremainedinthatforsakenandinanimatevillagethreedays。HefoundtheBoggsfamilyandcorkscrewedtheirhistoryuntothethirdandfourthgeneration。HeamassedthefactsandthelocalcolorofCranberryCorners。ThevillagehadnotgrownasrapidlyashadMissCarrington。TheactorestimatedthatithadsufferedasfewactualchangessincethedepartureofitssolitaryfollowerofThespisashadastageuponwhich"fouryearsissupposedtohaveelapsed。"HeabsorbedCran—

berryCornersandreturnedtothecityofchameleonchanges。

ItwasintherathskellerthatHighsmithmadethehitofhishistrioniccareer。Thereisnoneedtonametheplace;thereisbutonerathskellerwhereyoucouldhopetofindMissPosieCarringtonafteraperformanceof"TheKing’sBath—Robe。"

Therewasajollysmallpartyatoneofthetablesthatdrewmanyeyes。MissCarrington，petite，mar—

vellous，bubbling，electric，fame—drunken，shallbenamedfirst。HerrGoldsteinfollows，sonorous，curly—

haired，heavy，atrifleanxious，assomebearthathadcaught，somehow，abutterflyinhisclaws。Next，amancondemnedtoanewspaper，sad，courted，armed，analyzingforpressagent’sdrosseverysen—

tencethatwaspouredoverhim，eatinghisalaNew—

burginthesilenceofgreatness。Toconclude，ayouthwithpartedhair，anamethatisochretoredjournalsandgoldonthebackofasuppercheck。

Thesesatatatablewhilethemusiciansplayed，whilewaitersmovedinthemazyperformanceoftheirdutieswiththeirbackstowardallwhodesiredtheirservice，andallwasbizarreandmerrybecauseitwasninefeetbelowthelevelofthesidewalk。

At11。45abeingenteredtherathskeller。ThefirstviolinperceptiblyflattedaCthatshouldhavebeennatural;theclarionetblewabubbleinsteadofagracenote;MissCarringtongiggledandtheyouthwithpartedhairswallowedanoliveseed。

Exquisitelyandirreproachablyruralwasthenewentry。Alank，disconcerted，hesitatingyoungmanitwas，flaxen—haired，gapingofmouth，awkward，strickentomiserybythelightsandcompany。Hisclothingwasbutternut，withbrightbluetie，showingfourinchesofbonywristandwhite—sockedankle。

Heupsetachair，satinanotherone，curledafootaroundatablelegandcringedattheapproachofawaiter。

"Youmayfetchmeaglassoflagerbeer，"hesaid，inresponsetothediscreetquestioningoftheservitor。

Theeyesoftherathskellerwereuponhim。Hewasasfreshasacollardandasingenuousasahayrake。

Helethiseyeroveabouttheplaceasonewhore—

gards，big—eyed，hogsinthepotatopatch。HisgazerestedatlengthuponMissCarrington。Heroseandwenttohertablewithalateral，shiningsmileandablushofpleasedtrepidation。

"How’reye，MissPosie？"hesaidinaccentsnottobedoubted。"Don’tyerememberme—BillSum—

mers—theSummersesthatlivedbackoftheblack—

smithshop？IreckonI’vegrowedupsomesinceyeleftCranberryCorners。

"’LizaPerry’lowedImightseeyeinthecitywhileIwashere。Youknow’LizamarriedBennyStanfield，andshesays——"

"Ah，say！"interruptedMissCarrington，brightly，"LizePerryisnevermarried—what！Oh，thefrecklesofher！"

"MarriedinJune，"grinnedthegossip，"andlivin’

intheoldTatumPlace。HamRileyperfessedreli—

gion;oldMrs。BlitherssoldherplacetoCap’nSpooner;theyoungestWatersgirlrunawaywithamusicteacher;thecourt—houseburneduplastMarch;

youruncleWileywaselectedconstable;MatildaHos—

kinsdiedfromrunnin’aneedleinherhand，andTomBeedleiscourtin’SallieLathrop—theysayhedon’tmissanightbutwhathe’ssettin’ontheirporch。"

"Thewall—eyedthing！"exclaimedMissCarring—

ton，withasperity。"Why，TomBeedleonce——say，youfolks，excusemeawhile——thisisanoldfriendofmine——Mr。——whatwasit？Yes，Mr。Summers——Mr。Goldstein，Mr。Ricketts，Mr。——Oh，what’syours？’Johnny’’lldo——comeonoverhereandtellmesomemore。"

Sheswepthimtoanisolatedtableinacorner。

HerrGoldsteinshruggedhisfatshouldersandbeck—

onedtothewaiter。Thenewspapermanbrightenedalittleandmentionedabsinthe。Theyouthwithpartedhairwasplungedintomelancholy。Theguestsoftherathskellerlaughed，clinkedglassesandenjoyedthecomedythatPosieCarringtonwastreat—

ingthemtoafterherregularperformance。Afewcynicaloneswhispered"pressagent"’andsmiledwisely。

PosieCarringtonlaidherdimpledanddesirablechinuponherhands，andforgotheraudience——afacultythathadwonherlaurelsforher。

"Idon’tseemtorecollectanyBillSummers，"shesaid，thoughtfullygazingstraightintotheinnocentblueeyesoftherusticyoungman。"ButIknowtheSummerses，allright。Iguessthereain’tmanychangesintheoldtown。Youseeanyofmyfolkslately？"

AndthenHighsmithplayedhistrump。Thepartof"SolHaytosser"calledforpathosaswellascomedy。MissCarringtonshouldseethathecoulddothataswell。

"MissPosie，"said"BillSummers，""Iwasuptoyourfolkeseshousejisttwoorthreedaysago。No，thereain’tmanychangestospeakof。Thelilacbushbythekitchenwindowisoverafoothigher，andtheelminthefrontyarddiedandhadtobecutdown。

Andyetitdon’tseemthesameplacethatitusedtobe。"

"How’sma？"askedMissCarrington。

"Shewassettin’bythefrontdoor，crochetingalamp—matwhenIsawherlast，"said"Bill。""She’solder’nshewas，MissPosie。Buteverythinginthehouselookedjestthesame。Yourmaaskedmetosetdown。’Don’ttouchthatwillowrocker，William，"

saysshe。’Itain’tbeenmovedsincePosieleft;andthat’stheapronshewashemmin’，layin’overthearmofit，jistassheflungit。I’minhopes，’shegoeson，thatPosie’llfinishrunnin’outthathemsomeday。’"

MissCarringtonbeckonedperemptorilytoawaiter。

"Apintofextradry，"sheordered，briefly;"andgivethechecktoGoldstein。"

"Thesunwasshinin’inthedoor，"wentonthechroniclerfromCranberry，"andyourmawassettin’

rightinit。Iaskedherifshehadn’tbettermovebackalittle。’William，’saysshe，’whenIgetsotdownandlookin’downtheroad，Ican’tbeartomove。

Neveraday，’saysshe，’butwhatIsethereeveryminutethatIcanspareandwatchoverthempalin’sforPosie。Shewentawaydownthatroadinthenight，forweseenherlittleshoetracksinthedust，andsomethin’tellsmeshe’llcomebackthatwayag’inwhenshe’swearyoftheworldandbeginstothinkaboutheroldmother。"

"WhenIwascomin’away，"concluded"Bill，"

"Ipulledthisoff’nthebushbythefrontsteps。I

thoughtmaybeImightseeyouinthecity，andI

knowedyou’dlikesomethin’fromtheoldhome。"

Hetookfromhiscoatpocketarose—adrooping，yellow，velvet，odorousrose，thathungitsbeadinthefoulatmosphereofthattaintedrathskellerlikeavirginbowingbeforethehotbreathofthelionsinaRomanarena。

MissCarrington’spenetratingbutmusicallaughroseabovetheorcbestra’srenderingof"Bluebells。"

"Oh，say！"shecried，withglee，"ain’tthosepokyplacesthelimit？IjustknowthattwohoursatCranberryCornerswouldgivemethehorrorsnow。

Well，I’mawfulgladtohaveseenyou，Mr。Summers。

GuessI’llbustlearoundtothehotelnowandgetmybeautysleep。"

Shethrusttheyellowroseintothebosomofherwonderful，dainty，silkengarments，stoodupandnoddedimperiouslyatHerrGoldstein。

Herthreecompanionsand"BillSummers"at—

tendedhertohercab。Whenherflouncesandstreamerswereallsafelytuckedinsideshedazzledthemwithaurevoirsfromhershiningeyesandteeth。

"Comearoundtothehotelandseeme，Bill，beforeyouleavethecity，"shecalledastheglitteringcabrolledaway。

Highsmith，stillinhismake—up，wentwithHerrGoldsteintoacafebooth。

"Brightidea，eh？"askedthesmilingactor。

"Oughttoland’SolHaytosser’forme，don’tyouthink？Thelittleladyneveroncetumbled。"

"Ididn’tbearyourconversation，"saidGoldstein，butyourmake—upandactingwas0。K。Here’stoyoursuccess。You’dbettercallonMissCarringtonearlyto—morrowandstrikeherforthepart。Idon’tseehowshecankeepfrombeingsatisfiedwithyourexhibitionofability。"

At11。45A。M。onthenextdayHighsmith，hand—

some，dressedinthelatestmode，confident，withafuchsiainhisbutton—bole，sentuphiscardtoMissCarringtoninherselectapartmenthotel。

Hewasshownupandreceivedbytheactress’sFrenchmaid。

"Iamsorree，"saidMlle。Hortense，"butIamtosaythistoall。Itiswithgreatregret。MeesCar—

ringtonhavecancelledallengagementsonthestageandhavereturnedtoliveinthathowyoucallthattown？CranberryCornaire！"

THECLARIONCALL

HalfofthisstorycanbefoundintherecordsofthePoliceDepartment;theotherhalfbelongbehindthebusinesscounterofanewspaperoffice。

OneafternoontwoweeksafterMillionaireNor—

crosswasfoundinhisapartmentmurderedbyabur—

glar，themurderer，whilestrollingserenelydownBroadwayranplumpagainstDetectiveBarneyWoods。

"Isthatyou，JohnnyKernan？"askedWoods，whohadbeennear—sightedinpublicforfiveyears。

"Noless，"criedKernan，heartily。"Ifitisn’tBarneyWoods，lateandearlyofoldSaintJo！

You’llhavetoshowme！WhatareyoudoingEast？

Dothegreen—goodscircularsgetoutthatfar？"

saidWoods。

"I’vebeeninNewYorksomeyears，I’monthecitydetectiveforce。"

"Well，well！"saidKernan，breathingsmilingjoyandpattingthedetective’sarm。

"ComeintoMuller’s，"saidWoods，"andlet’shuntaquiettable。I’dliketotalktoyouawhile。"

Itlackedafewminutestothehouroffour。Thetidesoftradewerenotyetloosed，andtheyfoundaquietcornerofthecafe。Kernan，welldressedSlightlyswaggering，self—confident，seatedhimselfop—

positethelittledetective，withhispale，sandymus—

tache，squintingeyesandready—madecheviotsuit。

"Whatbusinessareyouinnow？"askedWoods。

"YouknowyouleftSaintJoayearbeforeIdid。"

"I’msellingsharesinacoppermine，"saidKer—

nan。"Imayestablishanofficehere。Well，well！

andsooldBarneyisaNewYorkdetective。Youalwayshadaturnthatway。Youwereonthepo—

liceinSaintJoafterIleftthere，weren’tyou？"

"Sixmonths，"saidWoods。"Andnowthere’sonemorequestion，Johnny。I’vefollowedyourrecordprettycloseeversinceyoudidthathoteljobinSara—

toga，andIneverknewyoutouseyourgunbefore。

WhydidyoukillNorcross？"

Kernanstaredforafewmomentswithconcen—

tratedattentionatthesliceoflemoninhishigh—ball;

andthenbelookedatthedetectivewithasudden，crooked，brilliantsmile。

"Howdidyouguessit，Barney？"heasked，ad—

miringly。"IswearIthoughtthejobwasascleanandassmoothasapeeledonion。DidIleaveastringhangingoutanywhere？"

Woodslaiduponthetableasmallgoldpencilin—

tendedforawatch—charm。

"It’stheoneIgaveyouthelastChristmaswewereinSaintJo。I’vegotyourshavingmugyet。

IfoundthisunderacorneroftheruginNorcross’sroom。Iwarnyoutobecarefulwhatyousay。I’vegotitputontoyou，Johnny。Wewereoldfriendsonce，butImustdomyduty。You’llhavetogotothechairforNorcross。"Kernanlaughed。

"Myluckstayswithme，"saidbe。"Who’dhavethoughtoldBarneywasonmytrail！"Heslippedonehandinsidehiscoat。InaninstantWoodshadarevolveragainsthisside。

"Putitaway，"saidKernan，wrinklinghisnose。

"I’monlyinvestigating。Aha！Ittakesninetailorstomakeaman，butonecandoamanup。There’saholeinthatvestpocket。Itookthatpenciloffmychainandslippeditinthereincaseofascrap。Putupyourgun，Barney，andI’lltellyouwhyIhadtoshootNorcross。Theoldfoolstarteddownthehallafterme，poppingatthebuttonsonthebackofmycoatwithapeevishlittle。22andIhadtostophim。Theoldladywasadarling。Shejustlayinbedandsawher$12，000diamondnecklacegowith—

outachirp，whileshebeggedlikeapanhandlertohavebackalittlethingoldringwithagarnetworthabout$3。1guessshemarriedoldNorcrossforhismoney，allright。Don’ttheyhangontothelittletrinketsfromtheManWhoLostOut，though？

Thereweresixrings，twobroochesandachatelainewatch。Fifteenthousandwouldcoverthelot。"

"Iwarnedyounottotalk，"saidWoods。

"Oh，that’sallright，"saidKernan。"Thestuffisinmysuitcaseatthehotel。AndnowI’lltellyouwhyI’mtalking。Becauseit’ssafe。I’mtalkingtoamanIknow。Youowemeathousanddollars，Bar—

neyWoods，andevenifyouwantedtoarrestmeyourhandwouldn’tmakethemove。"

"Ihaven’tforgotten，"saidWoods。"Youcountedouttwentyfiftieswithoutaword。I’llpayitbacksomeday。Thatthousandsavedmeand——well，theywerepilingmyfurnitureoutonthesidewalkwhenI

gotbacktothehouse。"

"Andso，"continuedKernan，"youbeingBarneyWoods，bornastrueassteel，andboundtoplayawhiteman’sgame，can’tliftafingertoarrestthemanyou’reindebtedto。Oh，IhavetostudymenaswellasYalelocksandwindowfasteningsinmybusiness。Now，keepquietwhileIringforthewaiter。I’vehadathirstforayearortwothatwor—

riesmealittle。IfI’mevercaughttheluckysleuthwillhavetodividehonorswitholdboyBooze。ButI

neverdrinkduringbusinesshours。AfterajobI

cancrookelbowswithmyoldfriendBarneywithaclearconscience。Whatareyoutaking？"

Thewaitercamewiththelittledecantersandthesiphonandleftthemaloneagain。

"You’vecalledtheturn，"saidWoods，asherolledthelittlegoldpencilaboutwithathoughtfulfore—

finger。I’vegottopassyouup。Ican’tlayahandonyou。IfI’da—paidthatmoneyback——butIdidn’t，andthatsettlesit。It’sabadbreakI’mmaking，Johnny，butIcan’tdodgeit。Youhelpedmeonce，anditcallsforthesame。"

"Iknewit，"saidKernan，raisinghisglass，withaflushedsmileofself—appreciation。"Icanjudgemen。Here’stoBarney，for——’he’sajollygoodfellow。’"

"Idon’tbelieve，"wentonWoodsquietly，asifbewerethinkingaloud，"thatifaccountshadbeensquarebetweenyouandme，allthemoneyinallthebanksinNewYorkcouldhaveboughtyououtofmyhandsto—night。"

"Iknowitcouldn’t，"saidKernan。"That’swhyIknewIwassafewithyou。"

"Mostpeople，"continuedthedetective，"lookside—

waysatmybusiness。Theydon’tclassitamongthefineartsandtheprofessions。ButI’vealwaystakenakindoffoolprideinit。AndhereiswhereIgo’busted。’IguessI’mamanfirstandadetectiveafterward。I’vegottoletyougo，andthenI’vegottoresignfromtheforce。IguessIcandriveanex—

presswagon。Yourthousanddollarsisfurtheroffthanever，Johnny。"

"Oh，you’rewelcometoit，"saidKernan，withalordlyair。"I’dbewillingtocallthedebtoff，butIknowyouwouldn’thaveitItwasaluckydayformewhenyouborrowedit。Andnow，let’sdropthesubject。I’mofftotheWestonamorningtrain。

IknowaplaceouttherewhereIcannegotiatetheNorcrosssparks。Drinkup，Barney，andforgetyourtroubles。We’llhaveajollytimewhilethepoliceareknockingtheirheadstogetheroverthecase。

I’vegotoneofmySaharathirstsonto—night。ButI’minthebands——theunofficialbands——ofmyoldfriendBarney，andIwon’tevendreamofacop。"

Andthen，asKernan’sreadyfingerkeptthebut—

tonandthewaiterworking，hisweakpoint——atre—

mendousvanityandarrogantegotism，begantoshowitself。Herecountedstoryafterstoryofhissuc—

cessfulplunderings，ingeniousplotsandinfamoustransgressionsuntilWoods，withallhisfamiliaritywithevil—doers，feltgrowingwithinhimacoldab—

horrencetowardtheutterlyviciousmanwhohadoncebeenhisbenefactor。

"I’mdisposedof，ofcourse，"saidWoods，atlength。"ButIadviseyoutokeepundercoverforaspell。ThenewspapersmaytakeupthisNorcrossaffair。Therehasbeenanepidemicofburglariesandmanslaughterintownthissummer。"

ThewordsentKernanintoahighglowofsullenandvindictiverage。

"Tohellwiththenewspapers，"hegrowled。

"Whatdotheyspellbutbragandblowandboodleinbox—carletters？Supposetheydotakeupacasewhatdoesitamountto？Thepoliceareeasyenoughtofool;butwhatdothenewspapersdo？Theysendalotofpin—headreportersaroundtothescene;andtheymakeforthenearestsaloonandhavebeerwhiletheytakephotosofthebartender’soldestdaughterineveningdress，toprintasthefianceeoftheyoungmaninthetenthstory，whothoughtheheardanoisebelowonthenightofthemurder。That’saboutasnearasthenewspapersevercometorunningdownMr。Burglar。"

"Well，Idon’tknow，"saidWoods，reflecting。