第9章

"WhatareyougoingtodowithRusty？"askedPhil，asthatprivilegedpussypaddedintotheroom。

"IamgoingtotakehimhomewithmeandJosephandtheSarah-cat，"

announcedAuntJamesina，followingRusty。"Itwouldbeashametoseparatethosecatsnowthattheyhavelearnedtolivetogether。

It’sahardlessonforcatsandhumanstolearn。"

"I’msorrytopartwithRusty，"saidAnneregretfully，"butitwouldbenousetotakehimtoGreenGables。Marilladetestscats，andDavywouldteasehislifeout。Besides，Idon’tsupposeI’llbehomeverylong。I’vebeenofferedtheprincipalshipoftheSummersideHighSchool。"

"Areyougoingtoacceptit？"askedPhil。

"I——Ihaven’tdecidedyet，"answeredAnne，withaconfusedflush。

Philnoddedunderstandingly。NaturallyAnne’splanscouldnotbesettleduntilRoyhadspoken。Hewouldsoon——therewasnodoubtofthat。AndtherewasnodoubtthatAnnewouldsay"yes"whenhesaid"Willyouplease？"Anneherselfregardedthestateofaffairswithaseldom-ruffledcomplacency。ShewasdeeplyinlovewithRoy。

True，itwasnotjustwhatshehadimaginedlovetobe。Butwasanythinginlife，Anneaskedherselfwearily，likeone’simaginationofit？Itwastheolddiamonddisillusionofchildhoodrepeated——

thesamedisappointmentshehadfeltwhenshehadfirstseenthechillsparkleinsteadofthepurplesplendorshehadanticipated。

"That’snotmyideaofadiamond，"shehadsaid。ButRoywasadearfellowandtheywouldbeveryhappytogether，evenifsomeindefinablezestwasmissingoutoflife。WhenRoycamedownthateveningandaskedAnnetowalkintheparkeveryoneatPatty’sPlaceknewwhathehadcometosay；andeveryoneknew，orthoughttheyknew，whatAnne’sanswerwouldbe。

"Anneisaveryfortunategirl，"saidAuntJamesina。

"Isupposeso，"saidStella，shrugginghershoulders。"Royisanicefellowandallthat。Butthere’sreallynothinginhim。"

"Thatsoundsverylikeajealousremark，StellaMaynard，"saidAuntJamesinarebukingly。

"Itdoes——butIamnotjealous，"saidStellacalmly。"IloveAnneandIlikeRoy。Everybodysayssheismakingabrilliantmatch，andevenMrs。Gardnerthinkshercharmingnow。Itallsoundsasifitweremadeinheaven，butIhavemydoubts。

Makethemostofthat，AuntJamesina。"

RoyaskedAnnetomarryhiminthelittlepavilionontheharborshorewheretheyhadtalkedontherainydayoftheirfirstmeeting。

Annethoughtitveryromanticthatheshouldhavechosenthatspot。

Andhisproposalwasasbeautifullywordedasifhehadcopiedit，asoneofRubyGillis’lovershaddone，outofaDeportmentofCourtshipandMarriage。Thewholeeffectwasquiteflawless。

Anditwasalsosincere。TherewasnodoubtthatRoymeantwhathesaid。Therewasnofalsenotetojarthesymphony。

Annefeltthatsheoughttobethrillingfromheadtofoot。

Butshewasn’t；shewashorriblycool。WhenRoypausedforhisanswersheopenedherlipstosayherfatefulyes。

Andthen——shefoundherselftremblingasifshewerereelingbackfromaprecipice。Tohercameoneofthosemomentswhenwerealize，asbyablindingflashofillumination，morethanallourpreviousyearshavetaughtus。ShepulledherhandfromRoy’s。

"Oh，Ican’tmarryyou——Ican’t——Ican’t，"shecried，wildly。

Royturnedpale——andalsolookedratherfoolish。Hehad——

smallblametohim——feltverysure。

"Whatdoyoumean？"hestammered。

"ImeanthatIcan’tmarryyou，"repeatedAnnedesperately。

"IthoughtIcould——butIcan’t。"

"Whycan’tyou？"Royaskedmorecalmly。

"Because——Idon’tcareenoughforyou。"

AcrimsonstreakcameintoRoy’sface。

"Soyou’vejustbeenamusingyourselfthesetwoyears？"hesaidslowly。

"No，no，Ihaven’t，"gaspedpoorAnne。Oh，howcouldsheexplain？

SheCOULDN’Texplain。Therearesomethingsthatcannotbeexplained。

"IdidthinkIcared——trulyIdid——butIknownowIdon’t。"

"Youhaveruinedmylife，"saidRoybitterly。

"Forgiveme，"pleadedAnnemiserably，withhotcheeksandstingingeyes。

Royturnedawayandstoodforafewminuteslookingoutseaward。

WhenhecamebacktoAnne，hewasverypaleagain。

"Youcangivemenohope？"hesaid。

Anneshookherheadmutely。

"Then——good-bye，"saidRoy。"Ican’tunderstandit——I

can’tbelieveyouarenotthewomanI’vebelievedyoutobe。

Butreproachesareidlebetweenus。YouaretheonlywomanIcaneverlove。Ithankyouforyourfriendship，atleast。

Good-bye，Anne。"

"Good-bye，"falteredAnne。WhenRoyhadgoneshesatforalongtimeinthepavilion，watchingawhitemistcreepingsubtlyandremorselesslylandwarduptheharbor。Itwasherhourofhumiliationandself-contemptandshame。Theirwaveswentoverher。Andyet，underneathitall，wasaqueersenseofrecoveredfreedom。

SheslippedintoPatty’sPlaceintheduskandescapedtoherroom。

ButPhilwasthereonthewindowseat。

"Wait，"saidAnne，flushingtoanticipatethescene。"WaittilyouhearwhatIhavetosay。Phil，Royaskedmetomarryhim-andIrefused。"

"You——youREFUSEDhim？"saidPhilblankly。

"Yes。"

"AnneShirley，areyouinyoursenses？"

"Ithinkso，"saidAnnewearily。"Oh，Phil，don’tscoldme。

Youdon’tunderstand。"

"Icertainlydon’tunderstand。You’veencouragedRoyGardnerineverywayfortwoyears——andnowyoutellmeyou’verefusedhim。

Thenyou’vejustbeenflirtingscandalouslywithhim。Anne，I

couldn’thavebelieveditofYOU。"

"IWASN’Tflirtingwithhim——IhonestlythoughtIcareduptothelastminute——andthen——well，IjustknewINEVERcouldmarryhim。"

"Isuppose，"saidPhilcruelly，"thatyouintendedtomarryhimforhismoney，andthenyourbetterselfroseupandpreventedyou。"

"IDIDN’T。Ineverthoughtabouthismoney。Oh，Ican’texplainittoyouanymorethanIcouldtohim。"

"Well，IcertainlythinkyouhavetreatedRoyshamefully，"saidPhilinexasperation。"He’shandsomeandcleverandrichandgood。

Whatmoredoyouwant？"

"IwantsomeonewhoBELONGSinmylife。Hedoesn’t。Iwassweptoffmyfeetatfirstbyhisgoodlooksandknackofpayingromanticcompliments；andlateronIthoughtIMUSTbeinlovebecausehewasmydark-eyedideal。"

"Iambadenoughfornotknowingmyownmind，butyouareworse，"

saidPhil。

"_I_DOknowmyownmind，"protestedAnne。"Thetroubleis，mymindchangesandthenIhavetogetacquaintedwithitalloveragain。"

"Well，Isupposethereisnouseinsayinganythingtoyou。"

"Thereisnoneed，Phil。I’minthedust。Thishasspoiledeverythingbackwards。IcanneverthinkofRedmonddayswithoutrecallingthehumiliationofthisevening。Roydespisesme——

andyoudespiseme——andIdespisemyself。"

"Youpoordarling，"saidPhil，melting。"Justcomehereandletmecomfortyou。I’venorighttoscoldyou。I’dhavemarriedAlecorAlonzoifIhadn’tmetJo。Oh，Anne，thingsaresomixed-upinreallife。Theyaren’tclear-cutandtrimmedoff，astheyareinnovels。"

"IhopethatNOonewilleveragainaskmetomarryhimaslongasIlive，"sobbedpoorAnne，devoutlybelievingthatshemeantit。

ChapterXXXIX

DealswithWeddingsAnnefeltthatlifepartookofthenatureofananticlimaxduringthefirstfewweeksafterherreturntoGreenGables。ShemissedthemerrycomradeshipofPatty’sPlace。Shehaddreamedsomebrilliantdreamsduringthepastwinterandnowtheylayinthedustaroundher。Inherpresentmoodofself-disgust，shecouldnotimmediatelybegindreamingagain。Andshediscoveredthat，whilesolitudewithdreamsisglorious，solitudewithoutthemhasfewcharms。

ShehadnotseenRoyagainaftertheirpainfulpartingintheparkpavilion；butDorothycametoseeherbeforesheleftKingsport。

"I’mawfullysorryyouwon’tmarryRoy，"shesaid。"Ididwantyouforasister。Butyouarequiteright。Hewouldboreyoutodeath。

Ilovehim，andheisadearsweetboy，butreallyheisn’tabitinteresting。Helooksasifheoughttobe，butheisn’t。"

"Thiswon’tspoilOURfriendship，willit，Dorothy？"Annehadaskedwistfully。

"No，indeed。You’retoogoodtolose。IfIcan’thaveyouforasisterImeantokeepyouasachumanyway。Anddon’tfretoverRoy。Heisfeelingterriblyjustnow——Ihavetolistentohisoutpouringseveryday——buthe’llgetoverit。Healwaysdoes。"

"Oh——ALWAYS？"saidAnnewithaslightchangeofvoice。

"Sohehas`gotoverit’before？"

"Dearme，yes，"saidDorothyfrankly。"Twicebefore。Andheravedtomejustthesamebothtimes。Notthattheothersactuallyrefusedhim——theysimplyannouncedtheirengagementstosomeoneelse。Ofcourse，whenhemetyouhevowedtomethathehadneverreallylovedbefore——thatthepreviousaffairshadbeenmerelyboyishfancies。ButIdon’tthinkyouneedworry。"

Annedecidednottoworry。Herfeelingswereamixtureofreliefandresentment。Royhadcertainlytoldhershewastheonlyonehehadeverloved。Nodoubthebelievedit。Butitwasacomforttofeelthatshehadnot，inalllikelihood，ruinedhislife。

Therewereothergoddesses，andRoy，accordingtoDorothy，mustneedsbeworshippingatsomeshrine。Nevertheless，lifewasstrippedofseveralmoreillusions，andAnnebegantothinkdrearilythatitseemedratherbare。

Shecamedownfromtheporchgableontheeveningofherreturnwithasorrowfulface。

"WhathashappenedtotheoldSnowQueen，Marilla？"

"Oh，Iknewyou’dfeelbadoverthat，"saidMarilla。"Ifeltbadmyself。

ThattreewasthereeversinceIwasayounggirl。ItblewdowninthebiggalewehadinMarch。Itwasrottenatthecore。"

"I’llmissitso，"grievedAnne。"Theporchgabledoesn’tseemthesameroomwithoutit。I’llneverlookfromitswindowagainwithoutasenseofloss。Andoh，InevercamehometoGreenGablesbeforethatDianawasn’theretowelcomeme。"

"Dianahassomethingelsetothinkofjustnow，"saidMrs。Lyndesignificantly。

"Well，tellmealltheAvonleanews，"saidAnne，sittingdownontheporchsteps，wheretheeveningsunshinefelloverherhairinafinegoldenrain。

"Thereisn’tmuchnewsexceptwhatwe’vewroteyou，"saidMrs。Lynde。

"Isupposeyouhaven’theardthatSimonFletcherbrokehisleglastweek。

It’sagreatthingforhisfamily。They’regettingahundredthingsdonethatthey’vealwayswantedtodobutcouldn’taslongashewasabout，theoldcrank。"

"Hecameofanaggravatingfamily，"remarkedMarilla。

"Aggravating？Well，rather！Hismotherusedtogetupinprayer-meetingandtellallherchildren’sshortcomingsandaskprayersforthem。`Courseitmadethemmad，andworsethanever。"

"Youhaven’ttoldAnnethenewsaboutJane，"suggestedMarilla。

"Oh，Jane，"sniffedMrs。Lynde。"Well，"sheconcededgrudgingly，"JaneAndrewsishomefromtheWest——camelastweek——andshe’sgoingtobemarriedtoaWinnipegmillionaire。YoumaybesureMrs。Harmonlostnotimeintellingitfarandwide。"

"DearoldJane——I’msoglad，"saidAnneheartily。"Shedeservesthegoodthingsoflife。"

"Oh，Iain’tsayinganythingagainstJane。She’saniceenoughgirl。

Butsheisn’tinthemillionaireclass，andyou’llfindthere’snotmuchtorecommendthatmanbuthismoney，that’swhat。Mrs。Harmonsayshe’sanEnglishmanwhohasmademoneyinminesbut_I_believehe’llturnouttobeaYankee。Hecertainlymusthavemoney，forhehasjustshoweredJanewithjewelry。HerengagementringisadiamondclustersobigthatitlookslikeaplasteronJane’sfatpaw。"

Mrs。Lyndecouldnotkeepsomebitternessoutofhertone。

HerewasJaneAndrews，thatplainlittleplodder，engagedtoamillionaire，whileAnne，itseemed，wasnotyetbespokenbyanyone，richorpoor。AndMrs。HarmonAndrewsdidbraginsufferably。

"WhathasGilbertBlythebeendoingtoatcollege？"askedMarilla。

"Isawhimwhenhecamehomelastweek，andheissopaleandthinIhardlyknewhim。"

"Hestudiedveryhardlastwinter，"saidAnne。"YouknowhetookHighHonorsinClassicsandtheCooperPrize。Ithasn’tbeentakenforfiveyears！SoIthinkhe’sratherrundown。

We’reallalittletired。"

"Anyhow，you’reaB。A。andJaneAndrewsisn’tandneverwillbe，"

saidMrs。Lynde，withgloomysatisfaction。

AfeweveningslaterAnnewentdowntoseeJane，butthelatterwasawayinCharlottetown——"gettingsewingdone，"Mrs。HarmoninformedAnneproudly。"OfcourseanAvonleadressmakerwouldn’tdoforJaneunderthecircumstances。"

"I’veheardsomethingveryniceaboutJane，"saidAnne。

"Yes，Janehasdoneprettywell，evenifsheisn’taB。A。，"saidMrs。Harmon，withaslighttossofherhead。"Mr。Inglisisworthmillions，andthey’regoingtoEuropeontheirweddingtour。

Whentheycomebackthey’llliveinaperfectmansionofmarbleinWinnipeg。Janehasonlyonetrouble——shecancooksowellandherhusbandwon’tlethercook。Heissorichhehireshiscookingdone。They’regoingtokeepacookandtwoothermaidsandacoachmanandaman-of-all-work。ButwhataboutYOU，Anne？Idon’thearanythingofyourbeingmarried，afterallyourcollege-going。"

"Oh，"laughedAnne，"Iamgoingtobeanoldmaid。Ireallycan’tfindanyonetosuitme。"Itwasratherwickedofher。

ShedeliberatelymeanttoremindMrs。Andrewsthatifshebecameanoldmaiditwasnotbecauseshehadnothadatleastonechanceofmarriage。ButMrs。Harmontookswiftrevenge。

"Well，theover-particulargirlsgenerallygetleft，Inotice。

Andwhat’sthisIhearaboutGilbertBlythebeingengagedtoaMissStuart？CharlieSloanetellsmesheisperfectlybeautiful。

Isittrue？"

"Idon’tknowifitistruethatheisengagedtoMissStuart，"

repliedAnne，withSpartancomposure，"butitiscertainlytruethatsheisverylovely。"

"IoncethoughtyouandGilbertwouldhavemadeamatchofit，"

saidMrs。Harmon。"Ifyoudon’ttakecare，Anne，allofyourbeauxwillslipthroughyourfingers。"

AnnedecidednottocontinueherduelwithMrs。Harmon。

Youcouldnotfencewithanantagonistwhometrapierthrustwithblowofbattleaxe。

"SinceJaneisaway，"shesaid，risinghaughtily，"Idon’tthinkIcanstaylongerthismorning。I’llcomedownwhenshecomeshome。"

"Do，"saidMrs。Harmoneffusively。"Janeisn’tabitproud。

Shejustmeanstoassociatewithheroldfriendsthesameasever。

She’llberealgladtoseeyou。"

Jane’smillionairearrivedthelastofMayandcarriedheroffinablazeofsplendor。Mrs。LyndewasspitefullygratifiedtofindthatMr。Ingliswaseverydayofforty，andshortandthinandgrayish。Mrs。Lyndedidnotsparehiminherenumerationofhisshortcomings，youmaybesure。

"Itwilltakeallhisgoldtogildapilllikehim，that’swhat，"

saidMrs。Rachelsolemnly。

"Helookskindandgood-hearted，"saidAnneloyally，"andI’msurehethinkstheworldofJane。"

"Humph！"saidMrs。Rachel。

PhilGordonwasmarriedthenextweekandAnnewentovertoBolingbroketobeherbridesmaid。Philmadeadaintyfairyofabride，andtheRev。Jowassoradiantinhishappinessthatnobodythoughthimplain。

"We’regoingforalovers’saunterthroughthelandofEvangeline，"

saidPhil，"andthenwe’llsettledownonPattersonStreet。

Motherthinksitisterrible——shethinksJomightatleasttakeachurchinadecentplace。ButthewildernessofthePattersonslumswillblossomliketheroseformeifJoisthere。

Oh，Anne，I’msohappymyheartacheswithit。"

Annewasalwaysgladinthehappinessofherfriends；butitissometimesalittlelonelytobesurroundedeverywherebyahappinessthatisnotyourown。AnditwasjustthesamewhenshewentbacktoAvonlea。ThistimeitwasDianawhowasbathedinthewonderfulglorythatcomestoawomanwhenherfirst-bornislaidbesideher。AnnelookedatthewhiteyoungmotherwithacertainawethathadneverenteredintoherfeelingsforDianabefore。Couldthispalewomanwiththeraptureinhereyesbethelittleblack-curled，rosy-cheekedDianashehadplayedwithinvanishedschooldays？Itgaveheraqueerdesolatefeelingthatsheherselfsomehowbelongedonlyinthosepastyearsandhadnobusinessinthepresentatall。

"Isn’theperfectlybeautiful？"saidDianaproudly。

ThelittlefatfellowwasabsurdlylikeFred——justasround，justasred。Annereallycouldnotsayconscientiouslythatshethoughthimbeautiful，butshevowedsincerelythathewassweetandkissableandaltogetherdelightful。

"BeforehecameIwantedagirl，sothatIcouldcallherANNE，"

saidDiana。"ButnowthatlittleFredishereIwouldn’texchangehimforamilliongirls。HejustCOULDN’Thavebeenanythingbuthisownpreciousself。"

"`Everylittlebabyisthesweetestandthebest，’"quotedMrs。Allangaily。"IflittleAnneHADcomeyou’dhavefeltjustthesameabouther。"

Mrs。AllanwasvisitinginAvonlea，forthefirsttimesinceleavingit。Shewasasgayandsweetandsympatheticasever。

Heroldgirlfriendshadwelcomedherbackrapturously。

Thereigningminister’swifewasanestimablelady，butshewasnotexactlyakindredspirit。

"Icanhardlywaittillhegetsoldenoughtotalk，"sighedDiana。

"Ijustlongtohearhimsay`mother。’Andoh，I’mdeterminedthathisfirstmemoryofmeshallbeaniceone。ThefirstmemoryI

haveofmymotherisofherslappingmeforsomethingIhaddone。

IamsureIdeservedit，andmotherwasalwaysagoodmotherandI

loveherdearly。ButIdowishmyfirstmemoryofherwasnicer。"

"Ihavejustonememoryofmymotheranditisthesweetestofallmymemories，"saidMrs。Allan。"Iwasfiveyearsold，andI

hadbeenallowedtogotoschoolonedaywithmytwooldersisters。

Whenschoolcameoutmysisterswenthomeindifferentgroups，eachsupposingIwaswiththeother。InsteadIhadrunoffwithalittlegirlIhadplayedwithatrecess。Wewenttoherhome，whichwasneartheschool，andbeganmakingmudpies。Wewerehavingaglorioustimewhenmyoldersisterarrived，breathlessandangry。

"`Younaughtygirl"shecried，snatchingmyreluctanthandanddraggingmealongwithher。`Comehomethisminute。Oh，you’regoingtocatchit！Motherisawfulcross。Sheisgoingtogiveyouagoodwhipping。’

"Ihadneverbeenwhipped。Dreadandterrorfilledmypoorlittleheart。IhaveneverbeensomiserableinmylifeasIwasonthatwalkhome。Ihadnotmeanttobenaughty。PhemyCameronhadaskedmetogohomewithherandIhadnotknownitwaswrongtogo。AndnowIwastobewhippedforit。Whenwegothomemysisterdraggedmeintothekitchenwheremotherwassittingbythefireinthetwilight。MypoorweelegsweretremblingsothatIcouldhardlystand。Andmother——motherjusttookmeupinherarms，withoutonewordofrebukeorharshness，kissedmeandheldmeclosetoherheart。`Iwassofrightenedyouwerelost，darling，’shesaidtenderly。Icouldseetheloveshininginhereyesasshelookeddownonme。SheneverscoldedorreproachedmeforwhatIhaddone——onlytoldmeImustnevergoawayagainwithoutaskingpermission。Shediedverysoonafterwards。ThatistheonlymemoryIhaveofher。Isn’titabeautifulone？"

Annefeltlonelierthaneverasshewalkedhome，goingbywayoftheBirchPathandWillowmere。Shehadnotwalkedthatwayformanymoons。Itwasadarkly-purplebloomynight。Theairwasheavywithblossomfragrance——almosttooheavy。Thecloyedsensesrecoiledfromitasfromanoverfullcup。Thebirchesofthepathhadgrownfromthefairysaplingsofoldtobigtrees。

Everythinghadchanged。Annefeltthatshewouldbegladwhenthesummerwasoverandshewasawayatworkagain。Perhapslifewouldnotseemsoemptythen。

"`I’vetriedtheworld——itwearsnomoreThecoloringofromanceitwore，’"

sighedAnne——andwasstraightwaymuchcomfortedbytheromanceintheideaoftheworldbeingdenudedofromance！

ChapterXL

ABookofRevelationTheIrvingscamebacktoEchoLodgeforthesummer，andAnnespentahappythreeweeksthereinJuly。MissLavendarhadnotchanged；

CharlottatheFourthwasaverygrown-upyoungladynow，butstilladoredAnnesincerely。

"Whenall’ssaidanddone，MissShirley，ma’am，Ihaven’tseenanyoneinBostonthat’sequaltoyou，"shesaidfrankly。

Paulwasalmostgrownup，too。Hewassixteen，hischestnutcurlshadgivenplacetoclose-croppedbrownlocks，andhewasmoreinterestedinfootballthanfairies。Butthebondbetweenhimandhisoldteacherstillheld。Kindredspiritsalonedonotchangewithchangingyears。

Itwasawet，bleak，crueleveninginJulywhenAnnecamebacktoGreenGables。Oneofthefiercesummerstormswhichsometimessweepoverthegulfwasravagingthesea。AsAnnecameinthefirstraindropsdashedagainstthepanes。

"WasthatPaulwhobroughtyouhome？"askedMarilla。"Whydidn’tyoumakehimstayallnight。It’sgoingtobeawildevening。"

"He’llreachEchoLodgebeforetheraingetsveryheavy，Ithink。

Anyway，hewantedtogobacktonight。Well，I’vehadasplendidvisit，butI’mgladtoseeyoudearfolksagain。`East，west，hame’sbest。’Davy，haveyoubeengrowingagainlately？"

"I’vegrowedawholeinchsinceyouleft，"saidDavyproudly。

"I’mastallasMiltyBoulternow。Ain’tIglad。He’llhavetostopcrowingaboutbeingbigger。Say，Anne，didyouknowthatGilbertBlytheisdying？"Annestoodquitesilentandmotionless，lookingatDavy。HerfacehadgonesowhitethatMarillathoughtshewasgoingtofaint。

"Davy，holdyourtongue，"saidMrs。Rachelangrily。"Anne，don’tlooklikethat——DON’TLOOKLIKETHAT！Wedidn’tmeantotellyousosuddenly。"

"Is——it——true？"askedAnneinavoicethatwasnothers。

"Gilbertisveryill，"saidMrs。Lyndegravely。"HetookdownwithtyphoidfeverjustafteryouleftforEchoLodge。Didyouneverhearofit？"

"No，"saidthatunknownvoice。

"Itwasaverybadcasefromthestart。Thedoctorsaidhe’dbeenterriblyrundown。They’veatrainednurseandeverything’sbeendone。DON’Tlooklikethat，Anne。Whilethere’slifethere’shope。"

"Mr。Harrisonwasherethiseveningandhesaidtheyhadnohopeofhim，"

reiteratedDavy。

Marilla，lookingoldandwornandtired，gotupandmarchedDavygrimlyoutofthekitchen。

"Oh，DON’Tlookso，dear，"saidMrs。Rachel，puttingherkindoldarmsaboutthepallidgirl。"Ihaven’tgivenuphope，indeedIhaven’t。

He’sgottheBlytheconstitutioninhisfavor，that’swhat。"

AnnegentlyputMrs。Lynde’sarmsawayfromher，walkedblindlyacrossthekitchen，throughthehall，upthestairstoheroldroom。

Atitswindowshekneltdown，staringoutunseeingly。Itwasverydark。

Therainwasbeatingdownovertheshiveringfields。TheHauntedWoodswasfullofthegroansofmightytreeswrunginthetempest，andtheairthrobbedwiththethunderouscrashofbillowsonthedistantshore。

AndGilbertwasdying！

ThereisabookofRevelationineveryone’slife，asthereisintheBible。

Annereadhersthatbitternight，asshekeptheragonizedvigilthroughthehoursofstormanddarkness。ShelovedGilbert——hadalwayslovedhim！

Sheknewthatnow。Sheknewthatshecouldnomorecasthimoutofherlifewithoutagonythanshecouldhavecutoffherrighthandandcastitfromher。

Andtheknowledgehadcometoolate——toolateevenforthebittersolaceofbeingwithhimatthelast。Ifshehadnotbeensoblind——sofoolish——shewouldhavehadtherighttogotohimnow。Buthewouldneverknowthatshelovedhim——hewouldgoawayfromthislifethinkingthatshedidnotcare。Oh，theblackyearsofemptinessstretchingbeforeher！

Shecouldnotlivethroughthem——shecouldnot！Shecowereddownbyherwindowandwished，forthefirsttimeinhergayyounglife，thatshecoulddie，too。IfGilbertwentawayfromher，withoutonewordorsignormessage，shecouldnotlive。Nothingwasofanyvaluewithouthim。

Shebelongedtohimandhetoher。Inherhourofsupremeagonyshehadnodoubtofthat。HedidnotloveChristineStuart——neverhadlovedChristineStuart。Oh，whatafoolshehadbeennottorealizewhatthebondwasthathadheldhertoGilbert——tothinkthattheflatteredfancyshehadfeltforRoyGardnerhadbeenlove。Andnowshemustpayforherfollyasforacrime。

Mrs。LyndeandMarillacrepttoherdoorbeforetheywenttobed，shooktheirheadsdoubtfullyateachotheroverthesilence，andwentaway。Thestormragedallnight，butwhenthedawncameitwasspent。Annesawafairyfringeoflightontheskirtsofdarkness。Soontheeasternhilltopshadafire-shotrubyrim。

Thecloudsrolledthemselvesawayintogreat，soft，whitemassesonthehorizon；theskygleamedblueandsilvery。Ahushfellovertheworld。

Annerosefromherkneesandcreptdownstairs。Thefreshnessoftherain-windblewagainstherwhitefaceasshewentoutintotheyard，andcooledherdry，burningeyes。Amerryrollickingwhistlewasliltingupthelane。AmomentlaterPacifiqueBuotecameinsight。

Anne’sphysicalstrengthsuddenlyfailedher。Ifshehadnotclutchedatalowwillowboughshewouldhavefallen。PacifiquewasGeorgeFletcher’shiredman，andGeorgeFletcherlivednextdoortotheBlythes。Mrs。FletcherwasGilbert’saunt。

Pacifiquewouldknowif——if——Pacifiquewouldknowwhattherewastobeknown。

Pacifiquestrodesturdilyonalongtheredlane，whistling。HedidnotseeAnne。Shemadethreefutileattemptstocallhim。

Hewasalmostpastbeforeshesucceededinmakingherquiveringlipscall，"Pacifique！"

Pacifiqueturnedwithagrinandacheerfulgoodmorning。

"Pacifique，"saidAnnefaintly，"didyoucomefromGeorgeFletcher’sthismorning？"

"Sure，"saidPacifiqueamiably。"Igotdewordlas’nightdatmyfader，hewasseeck。ItwassostormydatIcouldn’tgoden，soI

startvairearlydismornin’。I’mgoin’troodewoodsforshortcut。"

"DidyouhearhowGilbertBlythewasthismorning？"Anne’sdesperationdrovehertothequestion。Eventheworstwouldbemoreendurablethanthishideoussuspense。

"He’sbetter，"saidPacifique。"Hegotdeturnlas’night。

Dedoctorsayhe’llbeallrightnowdissoonwhile。Hadcloseshave，dough！Datboy，hejus’keelhimselfatcollege。

Well，Imus’hurry。Deoldman，he’llbeinhurrytoseeme。"

Pacifiqueresumedhiswalkandhiswhistle。Annegazedafterhimwitheyeswherejoywasdrivingoutthestrainedanguishofthenight。

Hewasaverylank，veryragged，veryhomelyyouth。Butinhersighthewasasbeautifulasthosewhobringgoodtidingsonthemountains。

Never，aslongasshelived，wouldAnneseePacifique’sbrown，round，black-eyedfacewithoutawarmremembranceofthemomentwhenhehadgiventohertheoilofjoyformourning。

LongafterPacifique’sgaywhistlehadfadedintothephantomofmusicandthenintosilencefarupunderthemaplesofLover’sLaneAnnestoodunderthewillows，tastingthepoignantsweetnessoflifewhensomegreatdreadhasbeenremovedfromit。Themorningwasacupfilledwithmistandglamor。Inthecornernearherwasarichsurpriseofnew-blown，crystal-dewedroses。

Thetrillsandtricklesofsongfromthebirdsinthebigtreeaboveherseemedinperfectaccordwithhermood。Asentencefromaveryold，verytrue，verywonderfulBookcametoherlips，"Weepingmayendureforanightbutjoycomethinthemorning。"

XLI

LoveTakesUptheGlassofTime"I’vecomeuptoaskyoutogoforoneofourold-timeramblesthroughSeptemberwoodsand`overhillswherespicesgrow，’thisafternoon，"saidGilbert，comingsuddenlyaroundtheporchcorner。

"SupposewevisitHesterGray’sgarden。"

Anne，sittingonthestonestepwithherlapfullofapale，filmy，greenstuff，lookedupratherblankly。

"Oh，IwishIcould，"shesaidslowly，"butIreallycan’t，Gilbert。I’mgoingtoAlicePenhallow’sweddingthisevening，youknow。I’vegottodosomethingtothisdress，andbythetimeit’sfinishedI’llhavetogetready。I’msosorry。

I’dlovetogo。"

"Well，canyougotomorrowafternoon，then？"askedGilbert，apparentlynotmuchdisappointed。

"Yes，Ithinkso。"

"InthatcaseIshallhiemehomeatoncetodosomethingI

shouldotherwisehavetodotomorrow。SoAlicePenhallowistobemarriedtonight。Threeweddingsforyouinonesummer，Anne——Phil’s，Alice’s，andJane’s。I’llneverforgiveJanefornotinvitingmetoherwedding。"

"Youreallycan’tblameherwhenyouthinkofthetremendousAndrewsconnectionwhohadtobeinvited。Thehousecouldhardlyholdthemall。IwasonlybiddenbygraceofbeingJane’soldchum——atleastonJane’spart。IthinkMrs。Harmon’smotiveforinvitingmewastoletmeseeJane’ssurpassinggorgeousness。"

"Isittruethatsheworesomanydiamondsthatyoucouldn’ttellwherethediamondsleftoffandJanebegan？"

Annelaughed。

"Shecertainlyworeagoodmany。Whatwithallthediamondsandwhitesatinandtulleandlaceandrosesandorangeblossoms，primlittleJanewasalmostlosttosight。ButshewasVERY

happy，andsowasMr。Inglis——andsowasMrs。Harmon。"

"Isthatthedressyou’regoingtoweartonight？"askedGilbert，lookingdownatthefluffsandfrills。

"Yes。Isn’titpretty？AndIshallwearstarflowersinmyhair。

TheHauntedWoodisfullofthemthissummer。"

GilberthadasuddenvisionofAnne，arrayedinafrillygreengown，withthevirginalcurvesofarmsandthroatslippingoutofit，andwhitestarsshiningagainstthecoilsofherruddyhair。

Thevisionmadehimcatchhisbreath。Butheturnedlightlyaway。

"Well，I’llbeuptomorrow。Hopeyou’llhaveanicetimetonight。"

Annelookedafterhimashestrodeaway，andsighed。Gilbertwasfriendly——veryfriendly——fartoofriendly。HehadcomequiteoftentoGreenGablesafterhisrecovery，andsomethingoftheiroldcomradeshiphadreturned。ButAnnenolongerfounditsatisfying。

Theroseoflovemadetheblossomoffriendshippaleandscentlessbycontrast。AndAnnehadagainbeguntodoubtifGilbertnowfeltanythingforherbutfriendship。Inthecommonlightofcommondayherradiantcertaintyofthatraptmorninghadfaded。Shewashauntedbyamiserablefearthathermistakecouldneverberectified。

ItwasquitelikelythatitwasChristinewhomGilbertlovedafterall。

Perhapshewasevenengagedtoher。Annetriedtoputallunsettlinghopesoutofherheart，andreconcileherselftoafuturewhereworkandambitionmusttaketheplaceoflove。Shecoulddogood，ifnotnoble，workasateacher；andthesuccessherlittlesketcheswerebeginningtomeetwithincertaineditorialsanctumsauguredwellforherbuddingliterarydreams。But——but——Annepickeduphergreendressandsighedagain。

WhenGilbertcamethenextafternoonhefoundAnnewaitingforhim，freshasthedawnandfairasastar，afterallthegaietyoftheprecedingnight。Sheworeagreendress——nottheoneshehadworntothewedding，butanoldonewhichGilberthadtoldherataRedmondreceptionhelikedespecially。Itwasjusttheshadeofgreenthatbroughtouttherichtintsofherhair，andthestarrygrayofhereyesandtheiris-likedelicacyofherskin。Gilbert，glancingathersidewaysastheywalkedalongashadowywoodpath，thoughtshehadneverlookedsolovely。Anne，glancingsidewaysatGilbert，nowandthen，thoughthowmucholderhelookedsincehisillness。Itwasasifhehadputboyhoodbehindhimforever。

Thedaywasbeautifulandthewaywasbeautiful。AnnewasalmostsorrywhentheyreachedHesterGray’sgarden，andsatdownontheoldbench。Butitwasbeautifulthere，too——asbeautifulasithadbeenonthefarawaydayoftheGoldenPicnic，whenDianaandJaneandPriscillaandshehadfoundit。Thenithadbeenlovelywithnarcissusandviolets；nowgoldenrodhadkindleditsfairytorchesinthecornersandastersdotteditbluely。Thecallofthebrookcameupthroughthewoodsfromthevalleyofbircheswithallitsoldallurement；themellowairwasfullofthepurrofthesea；beyondwerefieldsrimmedbyfencesbleachedsilverygrayinthesunsofmanysummers，andlonghillsscarfedwiththeshadowsofautumnalclouds；withtheblowingofthewestwindolddreamsreturned。

"Ithink，"saidAnnesoftly，"that`thelandwheredreamscometrue’

isinthebluehazeyonder，overthatlittlevalley。"

"Haveyouanyunfulfilleddreams，Anne？"askedGilbert。

Somethinginhistone——somethingshehadnotheardsincethatmiserableeveningintheorchardatPatty’sPlace——madeAnne’sheartbeatwildly。Butshemadeanswerlightly。

"Ofcourse。Everybodyhas。Itwouldn’tdoforustohaveallourdreamsfulfilled。Wewouldbeasgoodasdeadifwehadnothinglefttodreamabout。Whatadeliciousaromathatlow-descendingsunisextractingfromtheastersandferns。

Iwishwecouldseeperfumesaswellassmellthem。I’msuretheywouldbeverybeautiful。"

Gilbertwasnottobethussidetracked。

"Ihaveadream，"hesaidslowly。"Ipersistindreamingit，althoughithasoftenseemedtomethatitcouldnevercometrue。

Idreamofahomewithahearth-fireinit，acatanddog，thefootstepsoffriends——andYOU！"

Annewantedtospeakbutshecouldfindnowords。Happinesswasbreakingoverherlikeawave。Italmostfrightenedher。

"Iaskedyouaquestionovertwoyearsago，Anne。IfIaskitagaintodaywillyougivemeadifferentanswer？"

StillAnnecouldnotspeak。Butsheliftedhereyes，shiningwithallthelove-raptureofcountlessgenerations，andlookedintohisforamoment。Hewantednootheranswer。

Theylingeredintheoldgardenuntiltwilight，sweetasduskinEdenmusthavebeen，creptoverit。Therewassomuchtotalkoverandrecall——thingssaidanddoneandheardandthoughtandfeltandmisunderstood。

"IthoughtyoulovedChristineStuart，"Annetoldhim，asreproachfullyasifshehadnotgivenhimeveryreasontosupposethatshelovedRoyGardner。

Gilbertlaughedboyishly。

"Christinewasengagedtosomebodyinherhometown。IknewitandsheknewIknewit。WhenherbrothergraduatedhetoldmehissisterwascomingtoKingsportthenextwintertotakemusic，andaskedmeifIwouldlookafterherabit，assheknewnooneandwouldbeverylonely。SoIdid。AndthenIlikedChristineforherownsake。SheisoneofthenicestgirlsI’veeverknown。Iknewcollegegossipcrediteduswithbeinginlovewitheachother。Ididn’tcare。Nothingmatteredmuchtomeforatimethere，afteryoutoldmeyoucouldneverloveme，Anne。

Therewasnobodyelse——therenevercouldbeanybodyelseformebutyou。I’velovedyoueversincethatdayyoubrokeyourslateovermyheadinschool。"

"Idon’tseehowyoucouldkeeponlovingmewhenIwassuchalittlefool，"saidAnne。

"Well，Itriedtostop，"saidGilbertfrankly，"notbecauseI

thoughtyouwhatyoucallyourself，butbecauseIfeltsuretherewasnochanceformeafterGardnercameonthescene。ButI

couldn’t——andIcan’ttellyou，either，whatit’smeanttomethesetwoyearstobelieveyouweregoingtomarryhim，andbetoldeveryweekbysomebusybodythatyourengagementwasonthepointofbeingannounced。IbelievedituntiloneblesseddaywhenIwassittingupafterthefever。IgotaletterfromPhilGordon——PhilBlake，rather——inwhichshetoldmetherewasreallynothingbetweenyouandRoy，andadvisedmeto`tryagain。’

Well，thedoctorwasamazedatmyrapidrecoveryafterthat。"

Annelaughed——thenshivered。

"IcanneverforgetthenightIthoughtyouweredying，Gilbert。

Oh，Iknew——IKNEWthen——andIthoughtitwastoolate。"

"Butitwasn’t，sweetheart。Oh，Anne，thismakesupforeverything，doesn’tit？Let’sresolvetokeepthisdaysacredtoperfectbeautyallourlivesforthegiftithasgivenus。"

"It’sthebirthdayofourhappiness，"saidAnnesoftly。

"I’vealwayslovedthisoldgardenofHesterGray’s，andnowitwillbedearerthanever。"

"ButI’llhavetoaskyoutowaitalongtime，Anne，"

saidGilbertsadly。"ItwillbethreeyearsbeforeI’llfinishmymedicalcourse。Andeventhentherewillbenodiamondsunburstsandmarblehalls。"

Annelaughed。

"Idon’twantsunburstsandmarblehalls。IjustwantYOU。

YouseeI’mquiteasshamelessasPhilaboutit。Sunburstsandmarblehallsmaybeallverywell，butthereismore`scopeforimagination’withoutthem。Andasforthewaiting，thatdoesn’tmatter。We’lljustbehappy，waitingandworkingforeachother——anddreaming。Oh，dreamswillbeverysweetnow。"

Gilbertdrewherclosetohimandkissedher。Thentheywalkedhometogetherinthedusk，crownedkingandqueeninthebridalrealmoflove，alongwindingpathsfringedwiththesweetestflowersthateverbloomed，andoverhauntedmeadowswherewindsofhopeandmemoryblew。

End