Saint’s Progress

第8章

Piersonwentbacktohisstudy，andwrotetoGratian。

"Ifyoucangetleaveforafewdays，mydear，Iwantyouathome。I

amtroubledaboutNollie。Eversincethatdisasterhappenedtohershehasbeengettingpaler;andto—dayshefainted。Shewon’tseeadoctor，butperhapsyoucouldgethertoseeGeorge。Ifyoucomeup，hewillsurelybeabletorunuptousforadayortwo。Ifnot，youmusttakeherdowntohimatthesea。IhavejustseenthenewsofyoursecondcousinCharliePierson’sdeath;hewaskilledinoneofthelastattacksontheSomme;hewasnephewofmycousinLeilawhom，asyouknow，Noelseeseverydayatherhospital。BertramhastheD。S。O。Ihavebeenlesshard—pressedlately;LauderhasbeenhomeonleaveandhastakensomeServicesforme。Andnowthecolderweatherhascome，Iamfeelingmuchfresher。Tryyourbesttocome。

Iamseriouslyconcernedforourbelovedchild。

"Youraffectionatefather"EDWARDPIERSON。"

Gratianansweredthatshecouldgetweek—endleave，andwouldcomeonFriday。Hemetheratthestation，andtheydrovethencestraighttothehospital，topickupNoel。Leilacametotheminthewaiting—

room，andPierson，thinkingtheywouldtalkmorefreelyaboutNoel’shealthifheleftthem，alone，wentintotherecreationroom，andstoodwatchingagameofbagatellebetweentwoconvalescents。Whenhereturnedtothelittlesitting—roomtheywerestillstandingbythehearth，talkinginlowvoices。Gratianmustsurelyhavebeenstoopingoverthefire，forherfacewasred，almostswollen，andhereyeslookedasifshehadscorchedthem。

Leilasaidlightly:

"Well，Edward，aren’tthemendelightful？Whenarewegoingtoanotherconcerttogether？"

She，too，wasflushedandlookingalmostyoung。

"Ah！Ifwecoulddothethingswewantto。

"That’sverypretty，Edward;butyoushould，youknow——foratonic。"

Heshookhisheadandsmiled。

"You’reatemptress，Leila。WillyouletNollieknow，please，thatwecantakeherbackwithus？Canyouletheroffto—morrow？"

"Foraslongasyoulike;shewantsarest。I’vebeentalkingtoGratian。Weoughtn’ttohavelethergoonafterashocklikethat——myfault，I’mafraid。Ithoughtthatworkmightbebest。"

PiersonwasconsciousofGratianwalkingpasthimoutoftheroom。

HeheldouthishandtoLeila，andfollowed。Asmallnoiseoccurredbehindhimsuchasawomanmakeswhenshehasputafootthroughherownskirt，orhasotherpowerfulcausefordismay。ThenhesawNoelinthehall，andwasvaguelyawareofbeingthecentreofatriangleofwomenwhoseeyeswereplayingcatch—glance。Hisdaughterskissedeachother;andhebecameseatedbetweentheminthetaxi。Themostunobservantofmen，hepartedfromtheminthehallwithouthavingperceivedanythingexceptthattheywererathersilent;and，goingtohisstudy，hetookupaLifeofSirThomasMore。TherewasapassagethereinwhichheitchedtoshowGeorgeLaird，whowascomingupthatevening。

GratianandNoelhadmountedthestairswithlipstightset，andeyesaverted;bothwereverypale。WhentheyreachedthedoorofGratian’sroomtheroomwhichhadbeentheirmother’s——Noelwasforpassingon，butGratiancaughtherbythearm，andsaid:"Comein。"

Thefirewasburningbrightlyinthere，andthetwosistersstoodinfrontofit，oneoneachside，theirhandsclutchingthemantel—

shelf，staringattheflames。AtlastNoelputonehandinfrontofhereyes，andsaid:

"Iaskedhertotellyou。"

Gratianmadethemovementofonewhoisgrippedbytwostrongemotions，andlongstosurrendertooneortotheother。

"It’stoohorrible，"wasallshesaid。

Noelturnedtowardsthedoor。

"Stop，Nollie！"

Noelstoppedwithherhandonthedoorknob。"Idon’twanttobeforgivenandsympathisedwith。Ijustwanttobeletalone。"

"Howcanyoubeletalone？"

ThetideofmiserysurgedupinNoel，andshecriedoutpassionately:

"Ihatesympathyfrompeoplewhocan’tunderstand。Idon’twantanyone’s。Icanalwaysgoaway，andlosemyself。"

Thewords"can’tunderstand"gaveGratianashock。

"Icanunderstand，"shesaid。

"Youcan’t;youneversawhim。Youneversaw——"herlipsquiveredsothatshehadtostopandbitethem，tokeepbackarushoftears。

"Besidesyouwouldneverhavedoneityourself。"

Gratianwenttowardsher，butstopped，andsatdownonthebed。Itwastrue。Shewouldneverhavedoneitherself;itwasjustthatwhich，forallherlongingtohelphersister，icedherloveandsympathy。Howterrible，wretched，humiliating！Herownsister，heronlysister，inthepositionofallthosepoor，badlybroughtupgirls，whoforgotthemselves！Andherfather——theirfather！Tillthatmomentshehadhardlythoughtofhim，toopreoccupiedbytheshocktoherownpride。Theword:"Dad！"wasforcedfromher。

Noelshuddered。

"Thatboy！"saidGratiansuddenly;"Ican’tforgivehim。Ifyoudidn’tknow——hedid。Itwas——itwas——"ShestoppedatthesightofNoel’sface。

"Ididknow，"shesaid。"ItwasI。Hewasmyhusband，asmuchasyoursis。Ifyousayawordagainsthim，I’llneverspeaktoyouagain:I’mglad，andyouwouldbe，ifyouweregoingtohaveone。

What’sthedifference，exceptthatyou’vehadluck，andI——haven’t。"

Herlipsquiveredagain，andshewassilent。

Gratianstaredupather。ShehadalongingforGeorge——toknowwhathethoughtandfelt。

"DoyoumindifItellGeorge？"shesaid。

Noelshookherhead。，"No！notnow。Tellanybody。"AndsuddenlythemiserybehindthemaskofherfacewentstraighttoGratian’sheart。

Shegotupandputherarmsroundhersister。

"Nolliedear，don’tlooklikethat！"

Noelsufferedtheembracewithoutresponse，butwhenitwasover，wenttoherownroom。

Gratianstayed，sorry，soreandvexed，uncertain，anxious。Herpridewasdeeplywounded，herhearttorn;shewasangrywithherself。Whycouldn’tshehavebeenmoresympathetic？Andyet，nowthatNoelwasnolongerthere，sheagaincondemnedthedead。Whathehaddonewasunpardonable。Nolliewassuch——achild！Hehadcommittedsacrilege。

IfonlyGeorgewouldcome，andshecouldtalkitalloutwithhim！

She，whohadmarriedforloveandknownpassion，hadinsightenoughtofeelthatNoel’slovehadbeendeep——sofarasanything，ofcourse，couldbedeepinsuchachild。Gratianwasatthematureageoftwenty。Buttohaveforgottenherselflikethat！Andthisboy！

Ifshehadknownhim，thatfeelingmighthavebeenmitigatedbythepersonalelement，soimportanttoallhumanjudgment;butneverhavingseenhim，shethoughtofhisconductas"caddish。"Andsheknewthatthiswas，andwouldbe，thetroublebetweenherandhersister。Howevershemightdisguiseit，Noelwouldfeelthatjudgmentunderneath。

Shestrippedoffhernurse’sgarb，putonaneveningfrock，andfidgetedabouttheroom。Anythingratherthangodownandseeherfatheragainbeforeshemust。This，whichhadhappened，wasbeyondwordsterribleforhim;shedreadedthetalkwithhimaboutNoel’shealthwhichwouldhavetocome。Shecouldsaynothing，ofcourse，untilNoelwished;and，verytruthfulbynature，theidea，ofhavingtoactaliedistressedher。

Shewentdownatlast，andfoundthembothinthedrawing—roomalready;Noelinafrillyeveningfrock，sittingbythefirewithherchinonherhand，whileherfatherwasreadingoutthewarnewsfromtheeveningpaper。Atsightofthatcool，dainty，girlishfigurebroodingoverthefire，andofherfather’swornface，thetragedyofthisbusinessthrustitselfonherwithredoubledforce。PoorDad！

PoorNollie！Awful！ThenNoelturned，andgavealittleshakeofherhead，andhereyessaid，almostasplainlyaslipscouldhavesaidit:’Silence！’Gratiannodded，andcameforwardtothefire。

Andsobeganoneofthosecalm，domesticevenings，whichcoversometimessuchdepthsofheartache。

Noelstayedupuntilherfatherwenttobed，thenwentupstairsatonce。Shehadevidentlydeterminedthattheyshouldnottalkabouther。Gratiansatonalone，waitingforherhusband！Itwasnearlymidnightwhenhecame，andshedidnottellhimthefamilynewstillnextmorning。Hereceiveditwithacuriouslittlegrunt。Gratiansawhiseyescontract，astheymighthave，perhaps，lookingatsomebadandcomplicatedwound，andthenstaresteadilyattheceiling。

Thoughtheyhadbeenmarriedoverayear，shedidnotyetknowwhathethoughtaboutmanythings，andshewaitedwithaqueersinkingatherheart。Thisskeletoninthefamilycupboardwasatestofhisaffectionforherself，atestofthequalityofthemanshehadmarried。Hedidnotspeakforalittle，andheranxietygrew。Thenhishandsoughthers，andgaveitahardsqueeze。

"PoorlittleNollie！ThisisacaseforMarkTapleyism。Butcheerup，Gracie！We’llgetherthroughsomehow。"

"Butfather！It’simpossibletokeepitfromhim，andimpossibletotellhim！OhGeorge！Ineverknewwhatfamilypridewastillnow。

It’sincredible。Thatwretchedboy！"

"’Demortuis。’Come，Gracie！Inthemidstofdeathweareinlife！

Nolliewasaplumblittleidiot。Butit’sthewar——thewar！Yourfathermustgetusedtoit;it’sararechanceforhisChristianity。"

"Dadwillbeassweetasanything——that’swhatmakesitsohorrible！"

GeorgeLairdredoubledhissqueeze。"Quiteright！Theold—fashionedfathercouldlethimselfgo。Butneedheknow？WecangetherawayfromLondon，andlateron，wemustmanagesomehow。Ifhedoeshear，wemustmakehimfeelthatNolliewas’doingherbit。’"

Gratianwithdrewherhand。"Don’t！"shesaidinamuffledvoice。

GeorgeLairdturnedandlookedather。Hewasgreatlyupsethimself，realisingperhapsmoretrulythanhisyoungwifetheviolenceofthisdisaster;hewasquitecapable，too，offeelinghowdeeplyshewasstirredandhurt;but，abornpragmatist，confrontinglifealwaysintheexperimentalspirit，hewasimpatientofthe:"Howawful！"

attitude。Andthisstreakofherfather’sascetictraditionalisminGratianalwaysrousedinhimawishtobreakitup。Ifshehadnotbeenhiswifehewouldhaveadmittedatoncethathemightjustaswelltryandalterthebone—formationofherhead，asbreakdownsuchafundamentaltraitofcharacter，but，beinghiswife，henaturallyconsideredalterationaspossibleasputtinganewstaircaseinahouse，orthrowingtworoomsintoone。And，takingherinhisarms，hesaid:"Iknow;butit’llallcomeright，ifweputagoodfaceonit。ShallItalktoNollie？"

Gratianassented，fromthedesiretobeabletosaytoherfather:

"Georgeisseeingher！"andsostaytheneedforadiscussion。Butthewholethingseemedtohermoreandmoreacalamitywhichnothingcouldlessenorsmoothaway。

GeorgeLairdhadplentyofcoolcourage，invaluableinmenwhohavetoinflictaswellastoalleviatepain，buthedidnotlikehismission"alittlebit"ashewouldhavesaid;andheproposedawalkbecausehedreadedascene。Noelacceptedforthesamereason。ShelikedGeorge，andwiththedisinteresteddetachmentofasister—in—

law，andtheshrewdnessofextremeyouth，knewhimperhapsbetterthandidhiswife。Shewassure，atallevents，ofbeingneithercondemnednorsympathisedwith。

Theymighthavegone，ofcourse，inanydirection，butchosetomakefortheCity。Suchdeepdecisionsaresubconscious。Theysought，nodoubt，adry，unemotionalregion;orperhapsonewhereGeorge，whowasinuniform，mightresthisarmfromtheautomatic—toygamewhichthemilitaryplay。TheyhadreachedCheapsidebeforehewasconscioustothefullofthebizarrenatureofthiswalkwithhisprettyyoungsister—in—lawamongallthebustling，black—coatedmobofmoney—makers。’Iwishthedevilwehadn’tcomeout！’hethought;

’itwouldhavebeeneasierindoors，afterall。’

Heclearedhisthroat，however，andsqueezingherarmgently，began:

"Gratian’stoldme，Nollie。Thegreatthingistokeepyourspiritup，andnotworry。"

"Isupposeyoucouldn’tcureme。"

Thewords，inthatdelicatespurningvoice，absolutelystaggeredGeorge;buthesaidquickly:

"Outofthequestion，Nollie;impossible！Whatareyouthinkingof？"

"Daddy。"

Thewords:"D——nDaddy！"rosetohisteeth;hebitthemoff，andsaid:"Blesshim！Weshallhavetoseetoallthat。Doyoureallywanttokeepitfromhim？Itmustbeonewayortheother;nouseconcealingit，ifit’stocomeoutlater。"

"No。"

Hestolealookather。Shewasgazingstraightbeforeher。Howdamnablyyoungshewas，howpretty！Alumpcameupinhisthroat。

"Ishouldn’tdoanythingyet，"hesaid;"tooearly。Lateron，ifyou’dlikemetotellhim。Butthat’sentirelyuptoyou，mydear;

heneedneverknow。"

"No。"

Hecouldnotfollowherthought。Thenshesaid:

"GratiancondemnsCyril。Don’tlether。Iwon’thavehimbadlythoughtof。Itwasmydoing。Iwantedtomakesureofhim。"

Georgeansweredstoutly:

"Gracie’supset，ofcourse，butshe’llsoonbeallright。Youmustn’tletitcomebetweenyou。Thethingyou’vegottokeepsteadilybeforeyouisthatlife’sahugewideadaptablething。Lookatallthesepeople！There’shardlyoneofthemwhohasn’tgotnow，orhasn’thad，somepersonaldifficultyortroublebeforethemasbigasyoursalmost;biggerperhaps。Andheretheyareaslivelyasfleas。That’swhatmakesthefascinationoflife——thejollyironyofitall。ItwoulddoyougoodtohaveaturninFrance，andseeyourselfinproportiontothewhole。"Hefeltherfingerssuddenlyslipunderhisarm，andwentonwithgreaterconfidence:

"Life’sgoingtobetheimportantthinginthefuture，Nollie;notcomfortandcloisteredvirtueandsecurity;butliving，andpressuretothesquareinch。Doyoutwig？Alltheoldhard—and—fasttraditionsanddragsonlifeareinthemelting—pot。Death’sboilingtheirbones，andthey’llmakeexcellentstockforthenewsoup。Whenyoupruneanddockthings，thesapflowsquicker。Regretsandrepiningsandrepressionsaregoingoutoffashion;weshallhavenotimeorusefortheminthefuture。You’regoingtomakelife——well，that’ssomethingtobethankfulfor，anyway。You’vekeptCyrilMorlandalive。And——well，youknow，we’veallbeenborn;someofusproperly，andsomeimproperly，andthereisn’taha’porthofdifferenceinthevalueofthearticle，orthetroubleofbringingitintotheworld。Thecheerieryouarethebetteryourchildwillbe，andthat’sallyou’vegottothinkabout。Youneedn’tbegintotroubleatallforanothercoupleofmonths，atleast;afterthat，justletusknowwhereyou’dliketogo，andI’llarrangeitsomehow。"

Shelookedroundathim，andunderthatyoung，clear，broodinggazehehadthesuddenuncomfortablefeelingofhavingspokenlikeacharlatan。Hadhereallytouchedtheheartofthematter？Whatgoodwerehisgeneralitiestothisyoung，fastidiouslynurturedgirl，broughtuptotellthetruth，byafathersoold—fashionedanddevoted，whomsheloved？ItwasGeorge’snature，too，todespisewords;andtheconditionsofhislifetheselasttwoyearshadgivenhimasortofhorrorofthosewhoactbytalking。Hefeltinclinedtosay:’Don’tpaytheslightestattentiontome;it’sallhumbug;

whatwillbewillbe，andthere’sanendofit:

Thenshesaidquietly:

"ShallItellDaddyornot？"

Hewantedtosay:"No，"butsomehowcouldn’t。Afterall，thestraightforwardcoursewasprobablythebest。Forthiswouldhavetobealifelongconcealment。Itwasimpossibletoconcealathingforever;soonerorlaterhewouldfindout。Butthedoctorroseupinhim，andhesaid:

"Don’tgotomeettrouble，Nollie;it’llbetimeenoughintwomonths。Thentellhim，orletme。"

Sheshookherhead。"No;Iwill，ifitistobedone。"

Heputhishandonhers，withinhisarm，andgaveitasqueeze。

"WhatshallIdotillthen？"sheasked。

"Takeaweek’scompleterest，andthengoonwhereyouare。"

Noelwassilentaminute，thensaid:"Yes;Iwill。"

Theyspokenomoreonthesubject，andGeorgeexertedhimselftotalkabouthospitalexperiences，andthatphenomenon，theBritishsoldier。

Butjustbeforetheyreachedhomehesaid:

"Lookhere，Nollie！Ifyou’renotashamedofyourself，noonewillbeashamedofyou。Ifyouputashesonyourownhead，yourfellow—

beingswill，assistyou;forofsuchistheircharity。"

And，receivinganotherofthoseclear，broodinglooks，heleftherwiththethought:’Alonelychild！’

VII

Noelwentbacktoherhospitalafteraweek’srest。Georgehaddonemoreforherthanhesuspected，forhissaying:"Life’sahugewideadaptablething！"hadstuckinhermind。Diditmatterwhathappenedtoher？Andsheusedtolookintothefacesofthepeopleshemet，andwonderwhatwasabsorbingthem。Whatsecretgriefsandjoysweretheycarryingaboutwiththem？Thelonelinessofherownlifenowforcedhertothisspeculationconcerningothers，forshewasextraordinarilylonely;GratianandGeorgewerebackatwork，herfathermustbekeptatbay;withLeilashefeltillatease，fortheconfessionhadhurtherpride;andfamilyfriendsandacquaintancesofallsortssheshunnedliketheplague。TheonlypersonshedidnotsucceedinavoidingwasJimmyFort，whocameinoneeveningafterdinner，bringingheralargebunchofhothouseviolets。Butthen，hedidnotseemtomatter——toonewanacquaintance，toodetached。

Somethinghesaidmadeherawarethathehadheardofherloss，andthatthevioletswereatokenofsympathy。Heseemedawfullykindthatevening，tellingher"talesofAraby，"andsayingnothingwhichwouldshockherfather。Itwaswonderfultobeamanandrollabouttheworldashehad，andseealllife，andqueerplaces，andpeople——Chinamen，andGauchos，andBoers，andMexicans。Itgaveherakindofthirst。Andshelikedtowatchhisbrown，humorousface;whichseemedmadeofdriedleather。Itgaveherthefeelingthatlifeandexperiencewereallthatmattered，doingandseeingthings;itmadeherowntroubleseemsmaller;lessimportant。Shesqueezedhishandwhenshesaidgoodnight:"Thankyouformyvioletsandforcoming;

itwasawfullykindofyou！IwishIcouldhaveadventures！"Andheanswered:"Youwill，mydearfairyprincess！"Hesaiditqueerlyandverykindly。

FairyPrincess！Whatafunnythingtocallher！Ifhehadonlyknown！

Therewerenotmanyadventurestobehadinthoseregionswhereshewashedup。Notmuch"wideandadaptablelife"totakeherthoughtsoffherself。Butonherjourneystoandfromthehospitalshehadmorethanoneoddlittleexperience。Onemorningshenoticedapoorlydressedwomanwitharedandswollenface，flappingalongRegentStreetlikeawoundedbird，andbitingstrangelyatherhand。

Hearinghergroan，Noelaskedherwhatthematterwas。Thewomanheldoutthehand。"Oh！"shemoaned，"Iwasscrubbin’thefloorandIgotthisgreatneedlestuckthroughmy’and，andit’sbrokeoff，andIcan’tgetitout。Oh！Oh！"Shebitattheneedle—end，notquitevisible，butalmostwithinreachofteeth，andsuddenlywentverywhite。Indismay，Noelputanarmroundher，andturnedherintoafinechemist’sshop。Severalladieswereinthere，buyingperfumes，andtheylookedwithacerbityatthisdisordereddirtyfemaleenteringamongthem。Noelwentuptoamanbehindthecounter。"Pleasegivemesomethingquick，forthispoorwoman，I

thinkshe’sgoingtofaint。She’srunaneedlethroughherhand，andcan’tgetitout。"Themangaveher"somethingquick，"andNoelpushedpasttwoofthedamesbacktowherethewomanwassitting。

Shewasstillobstinatelybitingatherhand，andsuddenlyherchinflewup，andthere，betweenherteeth，wastheneedle。Shetookitfromthemwithherotherhand，stuckitproudlyinthefrontofherdress，andouttumbledthewords:"Oh！there——I’vegotit！"

Whenshehadswallowedthedraught，shelookedroundher，bewildered，andsaid:

"Thankyoukindly，miss！"andshuffledout。Noelpaidforthedraught，andfollowed;and，behindher，theshiningshopseemedtoexhaleaperfumedbreathofrelief。

"Youcan’tgobacktowork，"shesaidtothewoman。"Wheredoyoulive？"

"’Ornsey，miss。"

"Youmusttakea’busandgostraighthome，andputyourhandatonceintoweakCondy’sfluidandwater。It’sswelling。Here’sfiveshillings。"

"Yes，miss;thankyou，miss，I’msure。It’sverykindofyou。Itdoesachecruel。"

"Ifit’snotbetterthisafternoon，youmustgotoadoctor。

Promise！"

"Oh，dear，yes。’Ere’smy’bus。Thankyoukindly，miss。"

Noelsawherborneaway，stillsuckingatherdirtyswollenhand。

Shewalkedoninaglowofloveforthepoorwoman，andhatefortheladiesinthechemist’sshop，andforgotherowntroubletillshehadalmostreachedthehospital。

AnotherNovemberday，aSaturday，leavingearly，shewalkedtoHydePark。Theplane—treeswerejustattheheightoftheirspottedbeauty。Few——veryfew—yellowleavesstillhung;andtheslenderprettytreesseemedrejoicingintheirfreedomfromsummerfoliage。

Alltheirdelicateboughsandtwigswereshakinganddancinginthewind;andtheirrain—washedleopard—likebodieshadalitheun—Englishgaiety。Noelpasseddowntheirline，andseatedherselfonabench。Closeby，anartistwaspainting。Hiseaselwasonlysomethreeyardsawayfromher，andshecouldseethepicture;avistaoftheParkLanehousesthrough，thegayplane—treescreen。Hewasatallman，aboutforty，evidentlyforeign，withathin，long，oval，beardlessface，highbrow，largegreyeyeswhichlookedasifhesufferedfromheadachesandlivedmuchwithinhimself。Hecastmanyglancesather，and，pursuantofhernewinterestin"life"shewatchedhimdiscreetly;alittlestartledhowever，when，takingoffhisbroad—brimmedsquashhat，hesaidinabrokenaccent:

"ForgivemethelibertyItake，mademoiselle，butwouldyousoverykindlyallowmetomakeasketchofyousittingthere？Iworkveryquick。Ibegyouwillletme。IamBelgian，andhavenomanners，yousee。"Andhesmiled。

"Ifyoulike，"saidNoel。

"Ithankyouverymuch:"

Heshiftedhiseasel，andbegantodraw。Shefeltflattered，andalittlefluttered。Hewassopale，andhadacurious，half—fedlook，whichmovedher。

"HaveyoubeenlonginEngland？"shesaidpresently。

"Eversincethefirstmonthsofthewar。"

"Doyoulikeit？"

"Iwasveryhomesickatfirst。ButIliveinmypictures;therearewonderfulthingsinLondon。"

"Whydidyouwanttosketchme？"

Thepaintersmiledagain。"Mademoiselle，youthissomysterious。

ThoseyoungtreesIhavebeenpaintingmeansomuchmorethantheoldbigtrees。Youreyesareseeingthingsthathavenotyethappened。

ThereisFateinthem，andalookofdefendingusothersfromseeingit。Wehavenotsuchfacesinmycountry;wearesimpler;wedonotdefendourexpressions。TheEnglishareverymysterious。Wearelikechildrentothem。Yetinsomewaysyouarelikechildrentous。

Youarenotpeopleoftheworldatall。YouEnglishhavebeengoodtous，butyoudonotlikeus。"

"AndIsupposeyoudonotlikeus，either？"

Hesmiledagain，andshenoticedhowwhitehisteethwere。

"Well，notverymuch。TheEnglishdothingsfromduty，buttheirheartstheykeeptothemselves。AndtheirArt——well，thatisreallyamusing！"

"Idon’tknowmuchaboutArt，"Noelmurmured。

"Itistheworldtome，"saidthepainter，andwassilent，drawingwithincreasedpaceandpassion。

"Itissodifficulttogetsubjects，"heremarkedabruptly。"I

cannotaffordtopaymodels，andtheyarenotfondofmepaintingoutofdoors。IfIhadalwaysasubjectlikeyou！You——youhaveagrief，haveyounot？"

Atthatstartlinglittlequestion，Noellookedup，frowning。

"Everybodyhas，now。"

Thepaintergraspedhischin;hiseyeshadsuddenlybecometragical。

"Yes，"hesaid，"everybody。Tragedyisdailybread。Ihavelostmyfamily;theyareinBelgium。HowtheyliveIdonotknow。"

"I’msorry;verysorry，too，ifwearen’tnicetoyou，here。Weoughttobe。"

Heshruggedhisshoulders。"Whatwouldyouhave？Wearedifferent。

Thatisunpardonable。Anartistisalwayslonely，too;hehasaskinfewerthanotherpeople，andheseesthingsthattheydonot。Peopledonotlikeyoutobedifferent。Ifeverinyourlifeyouactdifferentlyfromothers，youwillfinditso，mademoiselle。"

Noelfeltherselfflushing。Washereadinghersecret？Hiseyeshadsuchapeculiar，secondsightedlook。

"Haveyounearlyfinished？"sheasked。

"No，mademoiselle;Icouldgoonforhours;butIdonotwishtokeepyou。Itiscoldforyou，sittingthere。"

Noelgotup。"MayIlook？"

"Certainly。"

Shedidnotquiterecogniseherself——whodoes？——butshesawafacewhichaffectedheroddly，ofagirllookingatsomethingwhichwas，andyetwasnot，infrontofher。

"MynameisLavendie，"thepaintersaid;"mywifeandIlivehere，"