第8章

amongtheAses,andthemajorityoftheconspicuousfailuresamongtheIfs。Idon"tknowbutthiswouldbeasgoodatestasthatofGideon,——lappingthewaterortakingitupinthehand。Ihaveapoeticalfriendwhoseconversationisstarredasthickwithifsasaboiledhamiswithcloves。Butanotherfriendofmine,abusinessman,whomItrustinmakingmyinvestments,wouldnotletmemeddlewithacertainstockwhichIfancied,because,ashesaid,"therearetoomanyifsinit。Asitlooksnow,Iwouldn"ttouchit。"

Inoticed,theotherevening,thatsomeprivateconversationwasgoingonbetweentheCounsellorandthetwoAnnexes。Therewasamischievouslookaboutthelittlegroup,andIthoughttheywerehatchingsomeplotamongthem。IdidnothearwhattheEnglishAnnexsaid,buttheAmericangirl"svoicewassharper,andIoverheardwhatsoundedtomelike,"ItistimetostirupthatyoungDoctor。"TheCounsellorlookedveryknowing,andsaidthathewouldfindachancebeforelong。Iwasratheramusedtoseehowreadilyheenteredintotheprojectoftheyoungpeople。Thefactis,theCounsellorisyoungforhistimeoflife;forhealreadybetrayssomesignsofthechangereferredtointhatoncefamiliarstreetsong,whichmyfriend,thegreatAmericansurgeon,inquiredforatthemusic—shopsunderthetitle,ashegotitfromtheItalianminstrel,"Silvatredimondigoo。"

Isaw,soonafterthis,thattheCounsellorwaswatchinghischanceto"stiruptheyoungDoctor。"

Itdoesnotfollow,becauseouryoungDoctor"sbaldspotisslowerincomingthanhecouldhavewished,thathehasnothadtimetoformmanysoundconclusionsinthecallingtowhichhehasdevotedhimselfVesalius,thefatherofmoderndescriptiveanatomy,publishedhisgreatworkonthatsubjectbeforehewasthirty。Bichat,thegreatanatomistandphysiologist,whodiednearthebeginningofthiscentury,publishedhistreatise,whichmadearevolutioninanatomyandpathology,ataboutthesameage;dyingsoonafterhehadreachedtheageofthirty。So,possiblytheCounsellormayfindthathehas"stirredup"ayoungmanwho,cantakecareofhisownhead,incaseofaggressivemovementsinitsdirection。

"Well,Doctor,"theCounsellorbegan,"howarestocks—inthemeaslesmarketaboutthesetimes？Anycornerinbronchitis？Anysyndicateinthevaccinationbusiness？"Allthisplayfully。

"Ican"tsayhowitiswithotherpeople"spatients;mostofmyfamiliesaredoingverywellwithoutmyhelp,atthistime。"

"Dotellme,Doctor,howmanyfamiliesyouown。Ihavehearditsaidthatsomeofourfellow—citizenshavetwodistinctfamilies,butyouspeakasifyouhadadozen。"

"Ihave,butnotsolargeanumberasIshouldlike。Icouldtakecareoffifteenortwentymorewithout:havingtoworktoohard。"

"Why,Doctor,youareasbadasaMormon。Whatdoyoumeanbycallingcertainfamiliesyours？"

"Don"tyouspeakaboutmyclient？Don"tyourclientscallyoutheirlawyer？Doesn"tyourbaker,doesn"tyourbutcher,speakofthefamilieshesuppliesashisfamilies？"

Tobesure,yes,ofcoursetheydo;butIhadanotionthatamanhadasmanydoctorsashehadorganstobedoctored。"

"Well,thereissometruthinthat;butdidyouthinktheold—

fashionedfamilydoctorwasextinct,afossillikethemegatherium？"

"Why,yes,aftertherecentexperienceofafriendofmine,Ididbegintothinkthattherewouldsoonbenosuchpersonageleftasthatsameold—fashionedfamilydoctor。ShallItellyouwhatthatexperiencewas？"

TheyoungDoctorsaidbeshouldbemightilypleasedtohearit。Hewasgoingtobeoneofthoseold—fogypractitionershimself。

"Idon"tknow,"theCounsellorsaid,"whethermyfriendgotalltheprofessionaltermsofhisstorycorrectly,norwhetherIhavegotthemfromhimwithoutmakinganymistakes;butifIdomakeblundersinsomeofthequeernames,youcancorrectme。Thisismyfriend"sstory:

"Myfamilydoctor,"hesaid,"wasaverysensibleman,educatedataschoolwheretheyprofessedtoteachallthespecialties,butnotconfininghimselftoanyonebranchofmedicalpractice。Surgicalpracticehedidnotprofesstomeddlewith,andthereweresomeclassesofpatientswhomhewaswillingtoleavetothefemalephysician。Butthroughouttherangeofdiseasesnotrequiringexceptionallyskilledmanualinterference,hiseducationhadauthorizedhimtoconsiderhimself,andhedidconsiderhimself,qualifiedtoundertakethetreatmentofallordinarycases—Itsohappenedthatmyyoungwifewasoneofthoseuneasypersonswhoareneverlongcontentedwiththeirhabitualcomfortsandblessings,butalwaystryingtofindsomethingalittlebetter,somethingnewer,atanyrate。Iwasgettingtobenearfiftyyearsold,andithappenedtome,asitnotrarelydoestopeopleataboutthattimeoflife,thatmyhairbegantofallout。Ispokeofittomydoctor,whosmiled,saiditwasapartoftheprocessofreversedevolution,butmightberetardedalittle,andgavemeaprescription。Ididnotfindanygreateffectfromit,andmywifewouldhavemegotoanoteddermatologist。Thedistinguishedspecialistexaminedmydenudedscalpwithgreatcare。Helookedatitthroughastrongmagnifier。Heexaminedthebulbofafallenhairinapowerfulmicroscope。Hedeliberatedforawhile,andthensaid,"Thisisacaseofalopecia。Itmayperhapsbepartiallyremedied。Iwillgiveyouaprescription。"Whichhedid,andtoldmetocallagaininafortnight。AttheendofthreemonthsIhadcalledsixtimes,andeachtimegotanewrecipe,anddetectednodifferenceinthecourseofmy"alopecia。"AfterIhadgotthroughmytreatment,Ishowedmyrecipestomyfamilyphysician;andwefoundthatthreeofthemwerethesamehehadused,familiar,old—fashionedremedies,andtheothersweretakenfromalistofnewandlittle—triedprescriptionsmentionedinoneofthelastmedicaljournals,whichwaslyingontheolddoctor"stable。Imightaswellhavegotnobetterunderhischarge,andshouldhavegotoffmuchcheaper。

"ThenexttroubleIhadwasalittlerednessoftheeyes,forwhichmydoctorgavemeawash;butmywifewouldhaveitthatImustseeanoculist。SoImadefourvisitstoanoculist,andatthelastvisittherednesswasnearlygone,——asitoughttohavebeenbythattime。Thespecialistcalledmycomplaintconjunctivitis,butthatdidnotmakeitfeelanybetternorgetwellanyquicker。IfIhadhadacataractoranygravediseaseoftheeye,requiringaniceoperationonthatdelicateorgan,ofcourseIshouldhaveproperlysoughttheaidofanexpert,whoseeye,hand,andjudgmentweretrainedtothatspecialbusiness;butinthiscaseIdon"tdoubtthatmyfamilydoctorwouldhavedonejustaswellastheexpert。

However,Ihadtoobeyorders,andmywifewouldhaveitthatI

shouldentrustmypreciouspersononlytothemostskilfulspecialistineachdepartmentofmedicalpractice。

"InthecourseoftheyearIexperiencedavarietyofslightindispositions。FortheseIwasauriscopedbyanaurist,laryngoscopedbyalaryngologist,auscultedbyastethoscopist,andsoon,untilacompleteinventoryofmyorganswasmadeout,andI

foundthatifIbelievedallthesesearchinginquirersprofessedtohavedetectedinmyunfortunateperson,IcouldrepeatwithtooliteraltruththewordsoftheGeneralConfession,"Andthereisnohealthinus。"Ineverheardsomanyhardnamesinallmylife。I

provedtobethesubjectofalongcatalogueofdiseases,andwhatmaladiesIwasnotmanifestlyguiltyofIwasatleastsuspectedofharboring。Iwashandedalongallthewayfromalopecia,whichusedtobecalledbaldness,tozoster,whichusedtobeknownasshingles。

Iwasthepatientofmorethanadozenspecialists。Verypleasantpersons,manyofthem,butwhatafusstheymadeaboutmytriflingincommodities！Pleaselookatthatphotograph。Seeifthereisaminuteelevationunderoneeye。"

""Onwhichside？"Iaskedhim,forIcouldnotbesuretherewasanythingdifferentononesidefromwhatIsawontheother。

""Underthelefteye。Icalleditapimple;thespecialistcalleditacne。Nowlookatthisphotograph。Itwastakenaftermyacnehadbeenthreemonthsundertreatment。Itshowsalittlemoredistinctlythaninthefirstphotograph,doesn"tit？"

""Ithinkitdoes,"Ianswered。"Itdoesn"tseemtomethatyougainedagreatdealbyleavingyourcustomaryadviserforthespecialist。"

""Well,"myfriendcontinued,"followingmywife"surgentcounsel,I

kepton,asItoldyou,forawholeyearwithmyspecialists,goingfromheadtofoot,andtaperingoffwithachiropodist。Igotadealofamusementoutoftheircontrivancesandexperiments。Someofthemlightedupmyinternalsurfaceswithelectricalorotherilluminatingapparatus。Thermometers,dynamometers,exploring—tubes,littlemirrorsthatwenthalf—waydowntomystomach,tuning—forks,ophthalmoscopes,percussion—hammers,singleanddoublestethoscopes,speculums,sphygmometers,——suchabatteryofdetectiveinstrumentsI

hadneverimagined。Alluseful,Idon"tdoubt;butattheendoftheyearIbegantoquestionwhetherIshouldn"thavedoneaboutaswelltosticktomylongtriedpractitioner。Whenthebillsfor"professionalservices"camein,andthenewcarpethadtobegivenup,andtheoldbonnettrimmedoveragain,andthesealskinsackremainedavision,webothagreed,mywifeandI,thatwewouldtrytogetalongwithoutconsultingspecialists,exceptinsuchcasesasourfamilyphysicianconsideredtobebeyondhisskill。""

TheCounsellor"sstoryofhisfriend"sexperiencesseemedtopleasetheyoungDoctorverymuch。It"stirredhimup,"butinanagreeableway;for,ashesaid,hemeanttodevotehimselftofamilypractice,andnottoadoptanylimitedclassofcasesasaspecialty。IlikedhisviewssowellthatIshouldhavebeenreadytoadoptthemasmyown,iftheyhadbeenchallenged。

TheyoungDoctordiscourses。

"Iamveryglad,"hesaid,"thatwehaveanumberofpractitionersamonguswhoconfinethemselvestothecareofsingleorgansandtheirfunctions。Iwanttobeabletoconsultanoculistwhohasdonenothingbutattendtoeyeslongenoughtoknowallthatisknownabouttheirdiseasesandtheirtreatment,——skilfulenoughtobetrustedwiththemanipulationofthatdelicateandmostpreciousorgan。Iwantanauristwhoknowsallabouttheearandwhatcanbedoneforitsdisorders。Themaladiesofthelarynxareveryticklishthingstohandle,andnobodyshouldbetrustedtogobehindtheepiglottiswhohasnotthetactuseruditus。Andsoofcertainotherparticularclassesofcomplaints。Agreatcitymusthavealimitednumberofexperts,eachafinalauthority,tobeappealedtoincaseswherethefamilyphysicianfindshimselfindoubt。Thereareoperationswhichnosurgeonshouldbewillingtoundertakeunlesshehaspaidaparticular,ifnotanexclusive,attentiontothecasesdemandingsuchoperations。AllthisIwillinglygrant。

"ButitmustnotbesupposedthatwecanreturntothemethodsoftheoldEgyptians——who,ifmymemoryservesmecorrectly,hadaspecialphysicianforeverypartofthebody——withoutfallingintocertainerrorsandincurringcertainliabilities。

"Thespecialistismuchlikeotherpeopleengagedinlucrativebusiness。Heisapttomagnifyhiscalling,tomakemuchofanysymptomwhichwillbringapatientwithinrangeofhisbatteryofremedies。Ifoundacaseinoneofourmedicaljournals,acoupleofyearsago,whichillustrateswhatImean。Dr。___________ofPhiladelphia,hadafemalepatientwithacrookednose,——deviatedseptum,ifouryoungscholarslikethatbetter。Shewassufferingfromwhatthedoctorcalledreflexheadache。Shehadbeentoanoculist,whofoundthatthetroublewasinhereyes。Shewentfromhimtoagynecologist,whoconsideredherheadacheasowingtocausesforwhichhisspecialtyhadtheremedies。Howmanymorespecialistswouldhaveappropriatedher,ifshehadgonetheroundsofthemall,Idarenotguess;butyouremembertheoldstoryofthesiege,inwhicheachartisanproposedmeansofdefencewhichbehimselfwasreadytofurnish。Thenashoemakersaid,"Hangyourwallswithnewboots。"

"Humannatureisthesamewithmedicalspecialistsasitwaswithancientcordwainers,anditistoopossiblethatahungrypractitionermaybewarpedbyhisinterestinfasteningonapatientwho,ashepersuadeshimself,comesunderhismedicaljurisdiction。

Thespecialisthasbutonefangwithwhichtoseizeandboldhisprey,butthatfangisafearfullylongandsharpcanine。Beingconfinedtoanarrowfieldofobservationandpractice,heisapttogivemuchofhistimetocuriousstudy,whichmaybemagnifique,butisnotexactlylaguerreagainstthepatient"smalady。Hedividesandsubdivides,andgetsmanyvarietiesofdiseases,inmostrespectssimilar。Theseheequipswithnewnames,andthuswehavethoseterrificnomenclatureswhichareenoughtofrightenthemedicalstudent,tosaynothingofthesufferersstaggeringunderthislongcatalogueoflocalinfirmities。The"old—fogy"doctor,whoknowsthefamilytendenciesofhispatient,who"understandshisconstitution,"

willoftentreathimbetterthanthefamousspecialist,whoseeshimforthefirsttime,andhastoguessatmanythings"theolddoctor"

knowsfromhispreviousexperiencewiththesamepatientandthefamilytowhichhebelongs。

"Itisagreatluxurytopractiseasaspecialistinalmostanyclassofdiseases。Thespecialpractitionerhashisownhours,hardlyneedsanight—bell,canhavehisresidenceoutofthetowninwhichheexerciseshiscalling,inshort,liveslikeagentleman;whilethehard—workedgeneralpractitionersubmitstoaservitudemoreexactingthanthatofthemanwhoisemployedinhisstableorinhiskitchen。

ThatisthekindoflifeIhavemadeupmymindto。"

Theteaspoonstinkledallroundthetable。Thiswastheusualsignofapprobation,insteadoftheclappingofhands。

TheyoungDoctorpaused,andlookedroundamongTheTeacups。"Ibegyourpardon,"hesaid,"fortakingupsomuchofyourtimewithmedicine。Itisasubjectthatagoodmanypersons,especiallyladies,takeaninterestinandhaveacuriosityabout,butIhavenorighttoturnthistea—tableintoalectureplatform。"

"Weshouldliketohearyoutalklongeraboutit,"saidtheEnglishAnnex。"Oneofushasthoughtofdevotingherselftothepracticeofmedicine。Wouldyoulecturetous;ifyouwereaprofessorinoneofthegreatmedicalschools？"

"Lecturetostudentsofyoursex？Whynot,Ishouldliketoknow？I

don"tthinkitisthecallingforwhichtheaveragewomanisespeciallyadapted,butmyteachergotapartofhismedicaleducationfromalady,MadameLachapelle;andIdon"tseewhy,ifonecanlearnfromawoman,hemaynotteachawoman,ifheknowsenough。"

"Wealllikealittlemedicaltalknowandthen,"saidNumberFive,"andwearemuchobligedtoyouforyourdiscourse。Youarespecialistenoughtotakecareofasprainedankle,Isuppose,areyounot？"

"IhopeIshouldbeequaltothatemergency,"answeredtheyoungDoctor;"butItrustyouarenotsufferingfromanysuchaccident？"

"No,"saidNumberFive,"butthereisnotellingwhatmayhappen。I

mightslip,andgetasprainorbreakasinew,orsomething,andI

shouldliketoknowthatthereisapractitionerathandtotakecareofmyinjury。IthinkIwouldriskmyselfinyourbands,althoughyouarenotaspecialist。Wouldyouventuretotakechargeofthecase？"

"Ah,mydearlady,"heansweredgallantly,"theriskwouldbeintheotherdirection。IamafraiditwouldbesaferforyourdoctorifhewereanoldermanthanIam。"

Thisisthefirstclearly,indisputablysentimentaloutbreakwhichhashappenedinconversationatourtable。Itrembletothinkwhatwillcomeofit;forwehaveseveralinflammableelementsinourcircle,andasparklikethisisliabletolightonanyoneortwoofthem。

Iwasnotsorrythatthismedicalepisodecameintovarytheusualcourseoftalkatourtable。Iliketohaveone——ofanintelligentcompany,whoknowsanythingthoroughly,holdthefloorforatime,anddiscourseuponthesubjectwhichchieflyengageshisdailythoughtsandfurnisheshishabitualoccupation。Itisaprivilegetomeetsuchapersonnowandthen,andlethimhavehisfullswing。

Butbecausethereare"professionals"towhomwearewillingtolistenasoracles,Idonotwanttoseeeverybodywhoisnota"professional"silencedorsnubbed,ifheventuresintoanyfieldofknowledgewhichhehasnotmadeespeciallyhisown。IliketoreadMontaigne"sremarksaboutdoctors,thoughhenevertookamedicaldegree。IcanevenenjoythetruthinthesharpsatireofVoltaireonthemedicalprofession。IfrequentlyprefertheremarksIhearfromthepewafterthesermontothoseIhavejustbeenhearingfromthepulpit。ThereareagreatmanythingswhichIneverexpecttocomprehend,butwhichIdesireverymuchtoapprehend。SupposethatourcircleofTeacupsweremadeupofspecialists,——expertsinvariousdepartments。Ishouldbeverywillingthateachoneshouldhavehisinningsatthepropertime,whenthecompanywerereadyforhim。Butthetimeiscomingwheneverybodywillknowsomethingabouteverything。Howcanonehavetheillustratedmagazines,the"PopularScienceMonthly,"thePsychologicaljournals,thetheologicalperiodicals,booksonallsubjects,forcedonhisattention,intheirownpersons,sotospeak,orinthereviewswhichanalyzeandpassjudgmentuponthem,withoutgettingsomeideaswhichbelongtomanyprovincesofhumanintelligence？Theairwebreatheismadeupoffourelements,atleast:oxygen,nitrogen,carbonicacidgas,andknowledge。Thereissomethingquitedelightfultowitnessintheabsorptionanddevotionofagenuinespecialist。

ThereisacertainsublimityinthatpictureofthedyingscholarinBrowning"s"AGrammarian"sFuneral:"——

"Sowiththethrottlinghandsofdeathatstrife,Groundheatgrammar;

Still,throughtherattle,partsofspeechwererife;

WhilehecouldstammerHesettledHoti"sbusiness——letitbe——

ProperlybasedOunGaveusthedoctrineoftheencliticDe,Deadfromthewaistdown。"

Agenuineenthusiasm,whichwillneverbesatisfieduntilithaspumpedthewelldryatthebottomofwhichtruthislying,alwaysexcitesourinterest,ifnotouradmiration。

OneofthepleasantestofourAmericanwriters,whomweallrememberasIkMarvel,andgreetinhismorerecentappearanceasDonaldGrantMitchell,speaksoftheawkwardnesswhichhefeelsinofferingtothepublica"panoramicviewofBritishwritersinthesedaysofspecialists,——whenstudentsdevotehalfalifetimetotheanalysisoftheworksofasingleauthor,andtotheproperstudyofasingleperiod。"

Heneednothavefearedthathisconnectedsketchesof"EnglishLands,LettersandKings"wouldbeanylesswelcomebecausetheydonotpretendtofillupallthedetailsorcoveralltheincidentstheyhintinvividoutline。HowmanyofuseverreadoreverwillreadDrayton"s"Poly—Olbion？"TwentythousandlongAlexandrinesarefilledwithadmirabledescriptionsofscenery,naturalproductions,andhistoricalevents,buthowmanyofusinthesedayshavetimetoreadandinwardlydigesttwentythousandAlexandrineverses？Ifearthatthespecialistisapttoholdhisintelligentreaderorhearertoocheap。SofarasIhaveobservedinmedicalspecialties,whatheknowsinadditiontotheknowledgeofthewell—taughtgeneralpractitionerisverylargelycuriousratherthanimportant。Havingexhaustedallthatispractical,thespecialistisnaturallytemptedtoamusehimselfwiththenaturalhistoryoftheorganorfunctionhedealswith;tofeelasawriting—masterdoeswhenhesetsacopy,——

notcontenttoshapethelettersproperly,buthemustaddflourishesandfancyfigures,toletoffhisspareenergy。

Iambeginningtobefrightened。WhenIbeganthesepapers,myideawasaverysimpleandinnocentone。Herewasamixedcompany,ofvariousconditions,asIhavealreadytoldmyreaders,whocametogetherregularly,andbeforetheywereawareofitformedsomethinglikeacluborassociation。AsIwasthepatriarchamongthem,theygavemethenamesomeofyoumayneedtoberemindedof;forasthesereportsarepublishedatintervals,youmaynotrememberthefactthatIamwhatTheTeacupshaveseenfittocallTheDictator。

Now,whatdidIexpectwhenIbeganthesepapers,andwhatisitthathasbeguntofrightenme？

Iexpectedtoreportgraveconversationsandlightcolloquialpassagesofarmsamongthemembersofthecircle。Iexpectedtohear,perhapstoread,apapernowandthen。Iexpectedtohave,fromtimetotime,apoemfromsomeoneofTheTeacups,forIfeltsuretheremustbeamongthemoneormorepoets,——Teacupsofthefinerandrarertranslucentkindofporcelain,tospeakmetaphorically。

OutoftheseconversationsandwrittencontributionsIthoughtI

mightmakeupareadableseriesofpapers;anotwhollyunwelcomestringofrecollections,anticipations,suggestions,toooftenperhapsrepetitions,thatwouldbetothetwilightwhatmyearlierserieshadbeentothemorning。

IhopedalsothatIshouldcomeintopersonalrelationswithmyoldconstituency,ifImaycallmynearerfriends,andthosemoredistantoneswhobelongtomyreadingparish,bythatname。ItistimethatIshould。Ireceivedthisblessedmorning——Iamtellingtheliteraltruth——ahighlyflatteringobituaryofmyselfintheshapeofanextractfrom"LeNational"ofthe10thofFebruarylast。Thisisabi—weeklynewspaper,publishedinFrench,inthecityofPlattsburg,ClintonCounty,NewYork。IamoccasionallyremindedbymyunknownfriendsthatImusthurryuptheirautograph,ormakehastetocopythatpoemtheywishtohaveintheauthor"sownhandwriting,oritwillbetoolate;butIhaveneverbeforebeenhuddledoutoftheworldinthisway。Itakethisratherprematureobituaryasahintthat,unlessIcometosomearrangementwithmywell—meaningbutinsatiablecorrespondents,itwouldbeaswelltoleaveitintype,forIcannotbearmuchlongertheloadtheylayuponme。IwillexplainmyselfonthispointafterIhavetoldmyreaderswhathasfrightenedme。

Iambeginningtothinkthisroomwherewetakeourteaismorelikeatinder—boxthanaquietandsafeplacefor"apartyinaparlor。"

Itistruethatthereareatleasttwoorthreeincombustiblesatourtable,butitlookstomeasifthecompanymightpairoffbeforetheseasonisover,likethecrewofHerMajesty"sshiptheMantelpiece,——threeorfourweddingsclearourwholetableofallbutoneortwooftheimpregnables。Thepoemwefoundinthesugar—bowllastweekfirstopenedmyeyestotheprobablestateofthings。Now,theideaofhavingtotellalove—story,——perhapstwoorthreelove—stories,——whenIsetoutwiththeintentionofrepeatinginstructive,useful,orentertainingdiscussions,naturallyalarmsme。Itisquitetruethatmanythingswhichlooktomesuspiciousmaybesimplyplayful。

Youngpeople（andwehaveseveralsuchamongTheTeacups）arefondofmake—believecourtingwhentheycannothavetherealthing,—

"flirting,"asitusedtobepractisedinthedaysofArcadianinnocence,notthemoremodernandmorequestionablerecreationwhichhasreachedusfromthehomeofthecicisbeo。Whatevercomesofit,IshalltellwhatIsee,andtaketheconsequences。

ButIamatthismomentgoingtotalkinmyownproperpersontomyownparticularpublic,which,asIfindbymycorrespondence,isaveryconsiderableone,andwithwhichIconsidermyselfinexceptionallypleasantrelations。

IhavereadrecentlythatMr。Gladstonereceivessixhundredlettersaday。Perhapshedoesnotreceivesixhundredletterseveryday,butifhegetsanythinglikehalfthatnumberdaily,whatcanhedowiththem？Therewasatimewhenhewassaidtoanswerallhiscorrespondents。Itisunderstood,Ithink,thathehasgivenupdoingsointheselaterdays。

IdonotpretendthatIreceivesixhundredorevensixtylettersaday,butIdoreceiveagoodmany,andhavetoldthepublicofthefactfromtimetotime,underthepressureoftheirconstantlyincreasingexertions。Asitisextremelyonerous,andissoongoingtobeimpossible,formetokeepupthewiderangeofcorrespondencewhichhasbecomealargepartofmyoccupation,andtendstoabsorballthevitalforcewhichisleftme,Iwishtoenterintoafinalexplanationwiththewell—meaningbutmercilesstaskmasterswhohavenowformanyyearsbeenlevyingtheirdailytaxuponme。Ihavepreservedthousandsoftheirletters,anddestroyedaverylargenumber,afteransweringmostofthem。AfewinterestingchaptersmightbemadeoutofthelettersIhavekept,——notonlysuchasaresignedbythenamesofwell—knownpersonages,butmanyfromunknownfriends,ofwhomIhadneverheardbeforeandhaveneverheardsince。

Agreatdealofthebestwritingthelanguagesoftheworldhaveeverknownhasbeencommittedtoleavesthatwitheredoutofsightbeforeasecondsunlighthadfallenuponthem。IhavehadmanylettersI

shouldhavelikedtogivethepublic,hadtheirnatureadmittedoftheirbeingofferedtotheworld。Whatstragglesofyoungambition,findingnoplaceforitsenergies,orfeelingitsincapacitytoreachtheidealtowardswhichitwasstriving！Whatlongingsofdisappointed,defeatedfellow—mortals,tryingtofindanewhomeforthemselvesintheheartofonewhomtheyhaveamiablyidealized！Andoh,whathopelesseffortsofmediocritiesandinferiorities,believinginthemselvesassuperiorities,andstumblingonthroughlimpingdisappointmentstoprostratefailure！Povertycomespleading,notforcharity,forthemostpart,butimploringustofindapurchaserforitsunmarketablewares。Theunreadableauthorparticularlyrequestsustomakeacriticalexaminationofhisbook,andreporttohimwhatevermaybeourverdict,——asifhewantedanythingbutourpraise,andthatveryoftentobeusedinhispublisher"sadvertisements。

Butwhatdoesnotonehavetosubmittowhohasbecomethemartyr——

theSaintSebastian——ofaliterarycorrespondence！Iwillnotdwellonthepossibleimpressionproducedonasensitivenaturebyreadingone"sownprematureobituary,asIhavetoldyouhasbeenmyrecentexperience。Iwillnotstoptothinkwhethertheurgentrequestforanautographbyreturnpost,inviewofthepossiblecontingencieswhichmightrenderitthelastonewasevertowrite,ispleasingornot。Atthreescoreandtwentyonemustexpectsuchhintsofwhatisliketohappenbeforelong。Isuppose,ifsomenearfriendweretowatchonewhowaslookingoversuchapressingletter,hemightpossiblyseeaslightshadowflitoverthereader"sfeatures,andsomesuchdialoguemightfollowasthatbetweenOthelloandIago,after"thishonestcreature"hasbeengivingbreathtohissuspicionsaboutDesdemona:

"Iseethishathalittledash"dyourspirits。

Notajot,notajot。