第6章

IreadintoLadyJohn’swonderfulmanner——whichquiteclamoured，moreover，foraninterpretation——allthatwasimpliedinthelessonIhadextractedfromotherportionsofthebusiness。Itwasdistinctlypoorshewhogavemethelead，anditwasnotlessdefinitethatsheputittomethatI

shouldrenderheraserviceeitherbyremainingwiththemorbyinventingsomething—thatwouldlureherpersecutoraway。Shedesiredhim，evenatthecostofherbeingleftalone，distractedfromhispursuit。

Poorhe，inhisquarter，Ihastentoadd，contributedtomypickingoutthisembroiderynothingmorehelpfulthanasustaineddetachment。Hesaidaslittleaspossible，seemedheedlessofwhatwasotherwisesaid，andonlygavemeonhisownaccountalookortwoofdimsuggestiveness。

Yetitwastheselooksthatmosttoldwithme，andwhatthey，fortheirpart，conveyedwasapleathatdirectlycontradictedLadyJohn’s。Iunderstoodhimthatitwashewhowasbored，hewhohadbeenpursued，heforwhomperversityhadbecomeadreadfulmenace，he，infine，whopleadedformyintervention。HewassowillingtotrustmetorelievehimofhiscompanionthatIthinkhewouldsimplyhaveboltedwithoutdeferringtomeifIhadnottakenmyprecautionsagainstit。Ihad，asithappened，anothermomentaryuseforhimthanthis：IwishedontheonehandnottolosehimandontheothernottoloseLadyJohn，thoughIhadquicklyenoughguessedthisbrilliantwoman’srealpreference，ofwhichitinfactsoonbecamemylivelywishtoseetheproof。Theunionofthesetwowastooartificialformenotalreadytohaveconnectedwithittheserviceitmightrender，inherladyship’sview，tothatundetectedcultivation，onherpart，ofasentimentforGilbertLongwhich，throughhisfeignedresponsetoit，fittedsocompletelytotheotherpiecesinmycollection。Toseeallthiswasatthetime，Iremember，tobeasinhumanlyamusedasifonehadfoundonecouldcreatesomething。IhadcreatednothingbutaclueortwotothelargercomprehensionIstillneeded，yetIpositivelyfoundmyselfovertakenbyamildartisticglow。Whathadoccurredwasthat，formyfulldemonstration，IneededLong，andthat，bythesamestroke，IbecamesureIshouldcertainlygethimbytemporisingalittle。

LadyJohnwasinlovewithhimandhadkickedup，tosavehercredit，thedustofafictiverelationwithanotherman——therelationoneofmereartificeandthemanoneinherencouragementofwhomnobodywouldbelieve。

Yetshewasalsodiscoverablydividedbetweenherprudenceandhervanity，forifitwasdifficulttomakepoorBrissfigureatallvividlyasaninsistentsatellite，thethanklesstactshehadtoemploygaveherexactly，sheargued，therighttoberefreshinglyfannedwithanoccasionalflapoftheflagunderwhichshehad，assheridiculouslyfancied，trulyconquered。

IfshewaswhereIfoundherbecauseherescorthaddraggedherthere，shehadmadethebestofitthroughthehopeofassistancefromanotherquarter。ShehadheldoutonthepossibilitythatMr。Long——whomoneCOULD

withoutabsurditysitinanarbourwith——mighthavehadsomehappydivinationofherplight。Hehadhadsuchdivinationsbefore——thankstoaconditioninhimthatmadesensibilityabnormal——andtheleastawretchedwomancoulddowhenbetrayedbytheexcessofnature’sbountywastoplayadmireragainstadmirerandbe"talkedabout"onherownterms。Shewouldjustthisoncehaveadmittedit，Iwastogather，tobeanoccasionforpleadingguilty——oh，soharmlessly！——toaconsciousnessofthegentlemanmutelynamedbetweenus。Well，the"proof"IjustalludedtowasthatIhadnotsatwithmyfriendsfiveminutesbeforeGilbertLongturnedup。

IsawinamomenthowneatlymybeingtherewiththemplayedHISgame；

IbecameinthisfashionawitnessforhimthathecouldalmostaslittleleaveLadyJohnaloneas——well，asotherpeoplecould。Itmayperfectlyhavebeenthepleasureofthisreflectionthatagainmadehimfreeandgay——producedinhim，inanycase，adifferentshadeofmannerfromthatwithwhich，beforeluncheon，astheconsequenceperhapsofavagueflairformypossiblepenetration，Ihadsuspectedhimofedgingawayfromme。

NotsincemyencounterwithhimatPaddingtontheafternoonbeforehadIhadsotorecognisehimasthetransfiguredtalker。ToseeLadyJohnwithhimwastohavelittleenoughdoubtofHERrecognitions，justasthisspectaclealsodottedeach"i"inmyconvictionofhisvenial——Icanonlycallitthat——duplicity。Imadeupmymindonthespotthatithadbeennopartofhisplantopractiseonher，andthattheworsthecouldhavebeenaccusedofwasagood—naturedacceptance，moreapparentthanreal，forhisownpurposes，ofhertheory——whichshefromtimetotimeletpeepout——thattheywouldhavelikedeachotherbetteriftheyhadn’tbeeneach，alas！sogood。Heprofitedbythehappyaccidentofhavingpleasedapersonsomuchinevidence，andindeeditwastolerablycleartomethatneitherpartywasduped。LadyJohndidn’twantalover；thiswouldhavebeen，aspeoplesay，alargerorderthan，giventheothercomplicationsofherexistence，shecouldmeet；butshewanted，inahighdegree，theappearanceofcarryingonapassionthatimposedalikefearlessrealisationsandconsciousrenouncements，andthiscircumstancefullyfellinwiththeconvenienceandthespecialsituationofherfriend。Hervanityrejoiced，sofarasshedaredtoletitnibble，andthemysteriesshepractised，thedissimulationssheelaborated，thegeneraldangerofdetectioninwhichsheflatteredherselfthatshepubliclywalked，wereafterallsomuchgristtothemillofthatappetite。

Byjustsomuch，however，asitcouldnevercomeupbetweenthemthattherewasanotherwomaninGilbert’shistory，byjustsomuchwoulditontheotherhandhavebeenanarticulateaxiomthatasmanyofthepoorBrissesoftheworldasshemightcaretoaccommodatewouldbewelcometofigureinherown。Thispersonage，underthatdeeperinduction，IsuddenlybecameawarethatIalsogreatlypitied——pitiedalmostasmuchasIpitiedMrs。Server；andmypityhaddoubtlesssomethingtodowiththefactthat，afterIhadproposedtohimthatweshouldadjourntogetherandwehad，onhisprompt，eventhoughslightlydryresponse，placedtheinvidiousarbouratacertaindistance，Ipassedmyhandintohisarm。TherewerethingsIwantedofhim，andthefirstwasthatheshouldletmeshowhimIcouldbekindtohim。Ihadmadeofthecircumstanceofteaatthehouseapretextforourleavingtheothers，eachofwhomIfeltasrathershowilycallingmyattentiontotheirgoodoldgroundfornotwishingtorejointhecrowd。AstowhatBrissendenwishedIhadmadeupmymind；Ihadmadeupmymindastothesubjectofhisthoughtswhiletheywandered，duringhisdetention，fromLadyJohn；andifthenextofmywisheswastoenterintohisdesire，Ihaddecidedongivingiteffectbythetimewereachedtheshortestofthevistasattheendofwhichthehouserearedabravefront。

Chapter7

IstayedhimtherewhileIputittohimthathewouldprobablyinfactprefertogoback。

"You’renotgoingthenyourself？"

"No，Idon’tparticularlywanttea；andImayaswellnowconfesstoyouthatI’mtakingalonely，unsociablewalk。Idon’tenjoysuchoccasionsasthese，"Isaid，"unlessIfromtimetotimegetoffbymyselfsomewherelongenoughtotellmyselfhowmuchIdoenjoythem。That’swhatIwascultivatingsolitudeforwhenIhappenedjustnowtocomeuponyou。WhenIfoundyoutherewithLadyJohntherewasnothingformebuttomakethebestofit；butI’mgladofthischancetoassureyouthat，everyappearancetothecontrarynotwithstanding，Iwasn’tprowlingaboutinsearchofyou。"

"Well，"mycompanionfranklyreplied，"I’mgladyouturnedup。Iwasn’tespeciallyamusingmyself。"

"Oh，IthinkIknowhowlittle！"

Hefixedmeamomentwithhispatheticoldface，andIknewmorethaneverthatIwassorryforhim。Iwasquiteextraordinarilysorry，andI

wonderedwhetherImightn’twithoutoffenceorindiscretionreallylethimseeit。ItwastothisendIhadheldhimandwantedalittletokeephim，andIwasreassuredasIfelthim，thoughIhadnowreleasedhim，lingerinsteadofleavingme。Ihadmadehimuneasylastnight，andanewreasonortwoformydoingsohadpossiblyevensincethencomeup；yetthesethingsalsowoulddependonthewayhemighttakethem。ThelookwithwhichheatpresentfacedmeseemedtohintthathewouldtakethemasIhoped，andtherewasnocurtness，butonthecontrarythedawnofadimsensethatImightpossiblyaidhim，inthetonewithwhichhecamehalf—way。"You’know’？"

"Ah，"Ilaughed，"Iknoweverything！"

Hedidn’tlaugh；Ihadn’tseenhimlaugh，atNewmarch，once；hewascontinuously，portentouslygrave，andIatpresentrememberedhowtheeffectofthishadtoldformeatluncheon，contrastedasitwaswiththatofMrs。Server’sdesperate，exquisitelevity。"YouknowIdecidedlyhavetoomuchofthatdreadfuloldwoman？"

Therewasasoundinthequestionthatwouldhavemademe，tomyownsense，start，thoughIasquicklyhopedIhadnotdonesotoBrissenden’s。

Icouldn’thavepersuadedmyself，however，thatIhadescapedshowinghimtheflushofmyefforttoshownothing。IhadtakenhisdisgustedallusionastoMrs。Brissenden，andtheactionofthatwasupsetting。Butnothing，fortunately，waspsychologicallymoreinterestingthantograspthenextmomentthetruthofhisreference。ItwasonlythefactofhishimselflookingsomucholderthanLadyJohnthathadblindedmeforaninstanttotheproprietyofhisnotthinkingofherasyoung。Shewasn’tyoungasHEhadarighttocallpeople，andIfeltaglow——also，Ifeared，toovisible——assoonasIhadseenwhomhemeant。HismeaningLadyJohndidmesomehowsomuchgoodthatIbelieveditwouldhavedonemestillmoretohearhimcallheraharridanoraJezebel。Itwasnoneofmybusiness；

howlittlewasanything，whenitcametothat，mybusiness！——yetindefinably，unutterably，Ifeltassuagedforhimandcomforted。Iverilybelieveithunginthebalanceaminuteortwothatinmyimpulsetodrawhimout，sothatImightgivehimmysympathy，Iwaspreparedtoriskoverturningtheedificeofmyprecautions。Iluckily，asithappened，didnothingofthesort；Icontrivedtobreatheconsolinglyonhissecretwithoutbetrayinganintention。Therewasalmostnooneintheplacesavetwoorthreeoftheveryyoungestwomenwhomhewouldn’thavehadarighttocallold。

LadyJohnwasahag，then；Mrs。Serverherselfwasmorethanontheturn；

GilbertLongwasfatandforty；andIcastaboutforsomelightinwhichIcouldshowthatI——aplusforteraison——wasapantaloon。"Ofcourseyoucan’tquiteseethefunofit，anditreallyisn’tfairtoyou。Youstruckmeasmuchmoreinyourelement，"Iventuredtoadd，"when，thismorning，morethanonce，IchancedtoobserveyouledcaptivebyMrs。Server。"

"Oh，that’sadifferentaffair，"heansweredwithanaccentthatpromisedagrowthofconfidence。

"Mrs。Server’sanoldwoman，"Icontinued，"butshecan’tseemtoafellowlikeyouasoldasLadyJohn。Shehasatanyratemorecharm；thoughperhapsnot，"Iadded，"quitesomuchtalk。"

Onthishesaidanextraordinarything，whichallbutmademestartagain。"Oh，shehasn’tanyTALK！"

Itook，asquicklyaspossible，refugeinasurpriseddemurrer。"NotANY？"

"Nonetospeakof。"

Iletallmywondercome。"Butwasn’tshechatteringtoyouatluncheon？"

Itforcedhimtomeetmyeyesatgreaterlength，andIcouldalreadyseethatmyexperiment——forinsidiouslyandpardonablysuchIwishedtomakeit——wasonthewaytosucceed。Ihadbeenrightthen，andIknewwhereIstood。Hecouldn’thavebeen"drawn"onhiswife，andhecouldn’thavebeendrawn，intheleastdirectly，onhimself，butashecouldthuseasilybeonLadyJohn，solikewisehecouldonotherwomen，orontheparticularone，atleast，whomatteredtome。IfeltIreallyknewwhatIwasabout，fortodrawhimonMrs。Serverwasintruthtodrawhimindirectlyonhimself。

ItwasindeedperhapsbecauseIhadbythistimeinameasureexpressed，intermshowevergeneral，theinterestwithwhichheinspiredme，thatInowfoundmyselffreetoshiftthegroundofmyindiscretion。IonlywantedhimtoknowthatonthequestionofMrs。ServerIwaspreparedtogoasfarwithhimasheshouldcaretomove。HowitcametomenowthathewasTHEabsolutelysafepersoninthehousetotallofherwith！"I

wastoofarawayfromyoutohear，"Ihadgoneon；"andIcouldonlyjudgeofherflowofconversationfromtheanimatedexpressionofherface。Itwasextraordinarilyanimated。Butthat，Iadmit，"Iadded，"strikesonealwaysasasortofpartipriswithher。She’sneverNOTextraordinarilyanimated。"

"Shehasnoflowofconversationwhatever，"saidGuyBrissenden。

Iconsidered。"Really？"

Heseemedtolookatmequitewithoutuneasinessnow。"Why，haven’tyouseenforyourself——？"

"Howthecasestandswithheronthathead？Doyoumeanhaven’tItalkedwithher？Well，scarcely；forit’safactthateverymaninthehouseBUT

Istrikesmeashavingbeendelugedwiththatprivilege：ifindeed，"I

laughed，"herabsenceoftopicssuffersittobeeitheraprivilegeoradeluge！Sheaffectsme，inanycase，asdeterminedtohavenothingtodowithme。Shewalksalltherestofyouabout；shegivesyoueachyourturn；meonlysheskips，shesystematicallyignores。I’mhalfconsoledforit，however，"Iwoundup，"byseeingwhatshortinningsanyindividualofyouhas。Youpersonallystrikemeashavinghadthelongest。"

BrissendenappearedtowonderwhereIwascomingout，yetnotasifhefearedit。Therewasevenaparticularplace，ifIcouldbutguessit，wherehewouldhavelikedmetocome。"Oh，she’sextremelycharming。Butofcourseshe’sstrikinglyodd。"

"Odd？——really？"

"Why，inthesense，Imean，thatIthoughtyousuggestedyou’venoticed。"

"Thatofextravagantvivacity？Oh，I’vehadtonoticeitatadistance，withoutknowingwhatitrepresents。"

Hejusthesitated。"Youhaven’tanyideaatallwhatitrepresents？"

"HowshouldIhave，"Ismiled，"whenshenevercomesnearme？I’vethoughtTHAT，asItellyou，marked。WhatdoesheravoidanceofMErepresent？Hasshehappened，withyou，tothrowanylightonit？"

"Ithink，"saidBrissendenafteranothermoment，"thatshe’sratherafraidofyou。"

Icouldonlybesurprised。"Themostharmlessmaninthehouse？"

"AREyoureally？"heasked——andtherewasatouchofthecomicinhearinghimputitwithhisinveterategravity。

"Ifyoutakemeforanythingelse，"Ireplied，"Idoubtifyou’llfindanyonetobackyou。"

Mycompanion，onthis，lookedawayforalittle，turnedabout，fixedhiseyesonthehouse，seemed，aswithadropofinterest，onthepointofleavingme。Butinsteadofleavingmehebroughtoutthenextmoment：

"Idon’twantanyonetobackme。Idon’tcare。Ididn’tmeanjustnow，"

hecontinued，"thatMrs。Serverhassaidtomeanythingagainstyou，orthatshefearsyoubecauseshedislikesyou。SheonlytoldmeshethoughtyoudislikedHER。"

Itgavemeakindofshock。"Acreaturesobeautiful，andso——so——"

"Sowhat？"heaskedasIfoundmyselfcheckedbymydesiretocometoheraid。

"Well，sobrilliantlyhappy。"

Ihadallhisattentionagain。"IsthatwhatsheIS？"

"Thendon’tyou，withyouropportunities，know？"Iwasconsciousofratheraninspiration，apartofwhichwastobejocose。"Whatareyoutrying，"Ilaughed，"togetoutofme？"

Itstruckmeluckilythat，thoughheremainedasproofagainstgaietyasever，hewas，thankstohispreoccupation，notdisagreeablyaffectedbymytone。"Ofcourseifyou’venoidea，Icangetnothing。"

"Noideaofwhat？"

ThenitwasthatIatlastgotitstraight。"Well，ofwhat’sthematterwithher。"

"Isthereanythingparticular？IfthereIS，"Iwenton，"there’ssomethingthatI’vegotoutofYOU！"

"Howso，ifyoudon’tknowwhatitis？"

"Doyoumeanifyouyourselfdon’t？"Butwithoutdetaininghimonthis，"Ofwhatinespecialdothesigns，"Iasked，"consist？"

"Well，ofeveryone’sthinkingso——thatthere’ssomethingorother。"

Thisagainstruckme，butitstruckmetoomuch。"Oh，everyone’safool！"

Hesaw，inhisqueerwanway，howithaddoneso。"ThenyouHAVEyourownidea？"

Idaresaymysmileathim，whileIwaited，showedadiscomfort。"Doyoumeanpeoplearetalkingabouther？"

Buthewaitedhimself。"Haven’ttheyshownyou——？"

"No，noonehasspoken。MoreoverIwouldn’thaveletthem。"

"ThenthereyouARE！"Brissendenexclaimed。"Ifyou’vekeptthemoff，itmustbebecauseyoudifferwiththem。"

"Ishan’tbesureofthat，"Ireturned，"tillIknowwhattheythink！

However，Irepeat，"Iadded，"thatIshouldn’teventhencare。Idon’tmindadmittingthatshemuchinterestsme。"

"Thereyouare，thereyouare！"hesaidagain。

"That’sallthat’sthematterwithhersofarasi’mconcerned。Yousee，atanyrate，howlittleitneedmakeherafraidofme。She’slovelyandshe’sgentleandshe’shappy。"

Myfriendkepthiseyesonme。"Whatistheretointerestyousointhat？Isn’titadescriptionthatappliesheretoadozenotherwomen？

Youcan’tsay，youknow，thatyou’reinterestedinthem，foryoujustspokeofthemassomanyfools。"

Therewasacertainsurpriseformeinsomuchacuteness，which，however，doubtlessadmonishedmeastotheneedofpresenceofmind。"Iwasn’tthinkingoftheladies——Iwasthinkingofthemen。"

"That’samiabletome，"hesaidwithhisgentlegloom。

"Oh，mydearBrissenden，Iexcept’you。’"

"Andwhyshouldyou？"

Ifeltatriflepushed。"I’lltellyousomeothertime。AndamongtheladiesIexceptMrs。Brissenden，withwhom，asyoumayhavenoticed，I’vebeenhavingmuchtalk。"

"Andwillyoutellmesomeothertimeaboutthattoo？"Onwhich，asIbutamicablyshookmyheadforno，hehadhisfirstdimnessofpleasantry。

"I’llgetitthenfrommywife。"

"Never。Shewon’ttellyou。"

"Shehaspassedyouherword？Thatwon’talterthefactthatshetellsmeeverything。"

Hereallysaiditinawaythatmademetakerefugeforaninstantinlookingatmywatch。"Areyougoingbacktotea？Ifyouare，I’ll，inspiteofmydesiretoroam，walktwentystepswithyou。"Ihadalreadyagainputmyhandintohisarm，andwestrolledforalittletillIthrewoffthatIwassureMrs。Serverwaswaitingforhim。TothisherepliedthatifIwishedtogetridofhimhewasaswillingtotakethatasanythingelseforgranted——anobservationthatI，onmyside，answeredwithaninquiry，thoughaninquirythathadnothingtodowithit。"DoyoualsotelleverythingtoMrs。Brissenden？"

ItbroughthimupshorterthanIhadexpected。"DoyouaskmethatinorderthatIshan’tspeaktoherofthis？"

Ishowedmyselfataloss。"Of’this’——？"

"Why，ofwhatwe’vemadeout——"

"AboutMrs。Server，youandI？Youmustactastothat，mydearfellow，quiteonyourowndiscretion。AllthemorethatwhatonearthHAVEwemadeout？IassureyouIhaven’tasecrettoconfidetoyouabouther，exceptthatI’veneverseenapersonmoreunquenchablyradiant。"

Healmostjumpedatit。"Well，that’sjustit！"

"Butjustwhat？"

"Why，whatthey’realltalkingabout。ThatsheISsoawfullyradiant。

Thatshe’ssotremendouslyhappy。It’sthequestion，"heexplained，"ofwhatintheworldshehastomakeherso。"

Iwincedalittle，buttriednottoshowit。"Mydearman，howdoiknow？"

"SheTHINKSyouknow，"heafteramomentanswered。

Icouldonlystare。"Mrs。ServerthinksIknowwhatmakesherhappy？"

Ithemoreeasilyrepresentedsuchaconvictionasmonstrousinthatittrulyhaditssurpriseforme。

ButBrissendennowwasallwithhisownthought。"SheISN’Thappy。"

"Youmeanthatthat’swhat’sthematterwithherunderherappearance——？

Thenwhatmakestheappearancesoextraordinary？"

"Why，exactlywhatImention——thatonedoesn’tseeanythingwhateverinhertocorrespondtoit。"

Ihesitated。"Doyoumeaninhercircumstances？"

"Yes——orinhercharacter。Hercircumstancesarenothingwonderful。

Shehasnonetoomuchmoney；shehashadthreechildrenandlostthem；

andnobodythatbelongstoherappearsevertohavebeenparticularlynicetoher。"

Iturneditover。"HowyouDOgetonwithher！"

"DoyoucallitgettingonwithhertobethemorebewilderedthemoreIseeher？"

"Isn’ttosayyou’rebewilderedonly，onthewhole，tosayyou’recharmed？

Thatalways——doesn’tit？——describesmoreorlessanyengrossedrelationwithalovelylady。"

"Well，I’mnotsureI’msocharmed。"Hespokeasifhehadthoughtthisparticularquestionoverforhimself；hehadhiswayofbeinglucidwithoutbrightness。"I’mnotatalleasilycharmed，youknow，"hethenextmomentadded；"andI’mnotafellowwhogoesaboutmuchafterwomen。"

"Ah，thatIneversupposed！WhyintheworldSHOULDyou？It’sthelastthing！"Ilaughed。"Butisn’tthis——quite（whatshallonecallit？）innocently——ratherapeculiarcase？"

Myquestionproducedinhimalittlegestureofelation——agestureemphasisedbyasnapofhisforefingerandthumb。"Iknewyouknewitwasspecial！

Iknewyou’vebeenthinkingaboutit！"

"Youcertainly，"Irepliedwithassurance，"have，duringthelastfiveminutes，mademedosowithsomesharpness。Idon’tpretendthatIdon’tnowrecognisethattheremustbesomethingthematter。Ionlydesire——notunnaturally——thatthereSHOULDbe，toputmeintherightforhavingthought，if，asyou’resosure，suchafreedomasthatcanbebroughthometome。

IfMrs。Serverisbeautifulandgentleandstrange，"Ispeciouslywenton，"whatarethosethingsbutanattraction？"

Isawhowhehadthem，whatevertheywere，beforehimasheslowlyshookhishead。"They’renotanattraction。They’retooqueer。"

Icaughtinaninstantmywaytofallinwithhim；andnotthelessthatIbythistimefeltmyselfcommitted，uptotheintellectualeyes，toascertainingjustHOWqueerthepersonunderdiscussionmightbe。"Oh，ofcourseI’mnotspeakingofherasapartytoasillyflirtation，oranobjectofanysortoftrivialpursuit。Buttherearesomanydifferentwaysofbeingtaken。"

"Forafellowlikeyou。Butnotforafellowlikeme。Formethere’sonlyone。"

"Tobe，youmean，inlove？"

Heputitalittledifferently。"Well，tobethoroughlypleased。"

"Ah，that’sdoubtlessthebestwayandthefirmground。Andyoumeanyou’reNOTthoroughlypleasedwithMrs。Server？"

"No——andyetIwanttobekindtoher。Thereforewhat’sthematter？"

"Oh，ifit’swhat’sthematterwithYOUyouaskme，thatextendsthequestion。Ifyouwanttobekindtoher，yougetonwithher，asweweresaying，quiteenoughformyargument。Andisn’tthematteralso，afterall，"Idemanded，"thatyousimplyfeelshedesiresyoutobekind？"

"Shedoesthat。"Andhelookedatmeaswiththesenseofdrawingfromme，forhisrelief，somegreaterhelpthanIwasasyetconsciousofthecouragetooffer。"Itisthatshedesiresme。Shelikesit。Andtheextraordinarythingisthatilikeit。"

"Andwhyintheworldshouldn’tyou？"

"Becausesheterrifiesme。Shehassomethingtohide。"

"But，mydearman，"Iaskedwithagaietysingularlyoutofrelationtothesmallsecretthrillproducedinmebythesewords——"mydearman，whatwomanwho’sworthanythinghasn’t？"

"Yes，buttherearedifferentways。WhatSHEtriesforisthisfalseappearanceofhappiness。"

Iweighedit。"Butisn’tthatthebestthing？"

"It’sterribletohavetokeepitup。"

"Ah，butifyoudon’tFORher？Ifitallcomesonherself？"

"Itdoesn’t，"GuyBrissendenpresentlysaid。"Ido——’for’her——helptokeepitup。"Andthen，stillunexpectedlytome，cameouttherestofhisconfession。"Iwantto——Itryto；that’swhatImeanbybeingkindtoher，andbythegratitudewithwhichshetakesit。Onefeelsthatonedoesn’twanthertobreakdown。"

Itwasonthis——fromthepoignanttouchinit——thatIatlastfeltI

hadburntmyshipsanddidn’tcarehowmuchIshowedIwaswithhim。"Oh，butshewon’t。Youmustkeephergoing。"

Hestoodalittlewithathumbineachpocketofhistrousers，andhismelancholyeyesrangingfarovermyhead——overthetopsofthehighesttrees。"Whoamitokeeppeoplegoing？"

"Why，you’rejusttheman。Aren’tyouhappy？"

Hestillrangedthetree—tops。"Yes。"

"Well，then，youbelongtotheusefulclass。You’vethewherewithaltogive。It’sthehappypeoplewhoshouldhelptheothers。"

Hehad，inthesameattitude，anotherpause。"It’seasyforYOUtotalk！"

"BecauseI’mnothappy？"

Itmadehimbringhiseyesagaindowntome。"Ithinkyou’realittlesonowatmyexpense。"

Ishookmyheadreassuringly。"Itdoesn’tcostyouanythingif——asI

confesstoitnow——Idotosomeextentunderstand。"

"That’smore，then，than——aftertalkingofitthiswaywithyou——Ifeelthatido！"

Hehadbroughtthatoutwithasuddensigh，turningawaytogoon；sothatwetookafewstepsmore。"You’venothingtotroubleabout，"Ithenfreelyremarked，"butthatyouAREaskindasthecaserequiresandthatyoudohelp。Idaresaythatyou’llfindherevennowontheterracelookingoutforyou。"Ipattedhisback，aswewentalittlefurther，butasI

stillpreferredtostayawayfromthehouseIpresentlystoppedagain。

"Don’tfallbelowyourchance。Noblesseoblige。We’llpullherthrough。"

"Yousay’we，’"hereturned，"butyoudokeepoutofit！"

"Whyshouldyouwishmetointerferewithyou？"Iasked。"Iwouldn’tkeepoutofitifshewantedmeasmuchasshewantsyou。That，byyourownadmission，isexactlywhatshedoesn’t。"

"Well，then，"saidBrissenden，"I’llmakehergoforyou。IthinkI

wantyourassistancequiteasmuchasshecanwantmine。"

"Oh，"Iprotestedforthis，"I’vereallygivenyoualreadyeveryounceofmineIcansqueezeout。AndyouknowforyourselffarmorethanIdo。"

"No，Idon’t！"——withwhichhebecamequitesharp；"foryouknowHOW

youknowit——whichI’venotanotionof。It’sjustwhatIthink，"hecontinued，facingmeagain，"yououghttotellme。"

"I’malittleindoubtofwhatyou’retalkingof，butIsupposeyoutoalludetotheoddityofmybeingsomuchinterestedwithoutmyhavingbeenmoreinformed。"

"You’vegotsomeclue，"Brissendensaid；"andaclueiswhatImyselfwant。"

"Thengetit，"Ilaughed，"fromMrs。Server！"

Hewondered。"Doessheknow？"