第12章

Lieutenant，threeoftheAmericanofficers，verynicefellows，theDr。，etc，sowemadeafineshowofwhatanembitteredcorrespondentofthelocalpapercalled’theshoddyaristocracyofApia’；andyoushouldhaveseenhowwecarriedon，andhowIclapped，andCaptainFosshollered’WUNDERSCHON！’andthrewhimselfforwardinhisseat，andhowweallinfactenjoyedourselveslikeschool-children，Austinnotashademorethanhisneighbours。ThentheCircusbrokeup，andthepartywenthome，butIstayeddown，havingbusinessonthemorrow。

Yesterday，October12th，greatnewsreachesme，andLloydandI，withthemailjustcomingin，mustleaveall，saddle，andridedown。Trueenough，thePresidenthadresigned！Soughttoresignhispresidencyofthecouncil，andkeephisadvisershiptotheKing；givenwaytotheConsul’sobjectionsandresignedall-thenfelloutwiththemaboutthedispositionofthefunds，andwasnowtryingtoresignfromhisresignation！SadlittlePresident，sotrimtolookat，andIbelievesokindtohislittlewife！Notonlyso，butI

meetD。onthebeach。D。callsmeinconsultation，andwemakewithinfinitedifficultyadraftofapetitiontotheKing……ThentodinneratM。’s，averymerrymeal，interruptedbeforeitwasoverbythearrivalofthecommittee。Slightsketchofprocedureagreedupon，selfappointedspokesman，andthedeputationsetsoff。WalkallthroughMatafele，allalongMulinuu，cometotheKing’shouse；hehasverballyrefusedtoseeusinanswertoourletter，swearingheisgase-gase(chief-sickness，notcommonman’s)，andindeedweseehiminsideinbed。Itisamiserablelowhouse，betterhousesbythedozeninthelittlehamlet(Tanugamanono)ofbushmenonourwaytoVailima；andthePresident’shouseinprocessoferectionjustopposite！

Wearetoldtoreturnto-morrow；Irefuse；andatlastweareverysourlyreceived，sitonthemats，andIopenout，throughaverypoorinterpreter，andsometimeshamperedbyunacceptablecounselsfrommybackers。Icanspeakfairlywellinaplainwaynow。C。askedmetowriteoutmyharangueforhimthismorning；Ihavedoneso，andcouldn’tgetitnearasgood。Isuppose(talkingandinterpreting)I

wastwentyminutesorhalf-an-houronthedeck；thenhismajestyrepliedinthedyingwhisperofabigchief；afewwordsofrejoinder(approving)，andthedeputationwithdrew，ratherwellsatisfied。

Afewdaysagothisinterventionwouldhavebeenadeportableoffence；notnow，Ibet；Iwouldlikethemtotry。AlittlewaybackalongMulinuu，Mrs。G。metuswithherhusband’shorse；andheandsheandLloydandIrodebackinaheavenlymoonlight。Hereendsachapterinthelifeofanislandpolitician！Catchmeatitagain；’tiseasytogoin，butitisnotapleasanttrade。Ihavehadagoodteam，asgoodasIcouldgetonthebeach；butwhattroubleevenso，andwhatfreshtroublesshaping。ButIhaveonthewholecarriedallmypoints；Ibelieveallbutone，andonthat(whichdidnotconcernme)Ihadnorighttointerfere。IamsureyouwouldbeamazedifyouknewwhatagoodhandIamatkeepingmytemper，talkingpeopleover，andgivingreasonswhicharenotmyreasons，butcalculatedforthemeridianoftheparticularobjection；sosoondoesfalsehoodawaitthepoliticianinhiswhirlingpath。

MYDEARCARTHEW，-SeewhatIhavewritten，butit’sColvinI’mafter-Ihavewrittentwochapters，aboutthirtypagesofWRECKERsincethemailleft，whichmustbemyexcuse，andthebotherI’vehadwithitisnottobeimagined，youmighthaveseenmethedaybeforeyesterdayweighingBritishsov。’sandChilidollarstoarrangemytreasurechest。Andtherewassuchacalculation，notforthatonly，butfortheship’spositionanddistanceswhen-butIamnotgoingtotellyoutheyarn-andthen，asmyarithmeticisparticularlylax，Lloydhadtogooverallmycalculations；andthen，asIhadchangedtheamountofmoney，hehadtogooverallHISastotheamountofthelay；andaltogether，abankcouldberunwithlesseffusionoffiguresthanittooktoshoreupasinglechapterofameaslyyarn。However，it’sdone，andI

havebutonemore，orattheoutsidetwo，todo，andIamFree！andcandoanydamnthingIlike。

Beforefallingonpolitics，Ishallgiveyoumyday。Awokesomewhereaboutthefirstpeepofday，camegraduallyto，andhadaturnontheverandahbefore5。55，when’thechild’(anenormousWallisIslander)bringsmeanorange；at6，breakfast；6。10，towork；whichlaststill，at10。30，Austincomesforhishistorylecture；thisisratherdispiriting，buteducationmustbegoneaboutinfaith-andcharity，bothofwhichprettynighfailedmeto-dayabout(ofallthings)

luncheon；afterluncheoninmymother’sroom，I

read。ofTHEWRECKER，thenBelle，Lloyd，andI

goupandmakemusicfuriouslytillabout2(Isuppose)，whenIturnintoworkagaintill4；foolfrom4tohalf-past，tiredoutandwaitingforthebathhour；4。30，bath；4。40，eattwoheavenlymangoesontheverandah，andseetheboysarrivewiththepack-horses；5，dinner；smoke，chatonverandah，thenhandofcards，andatlastat8comeuptomyroomwithapintofbeerandahardbiscuit，whichIamnowconsuming，andassoonastheyareconsumedIshallturnin。

Sucharetheinnocentdaysofthisancientandoutwornsportsman；to-daytherewasnoweeding，usuallythereishowever，edgeinsomewhere。MybooksforthemomentareacribtoPhaedo，andthesecondbookofMontaigne；andalittlewhilebackIwasreadingFredericHarrison，’ChoiceofBooks，’etc-verygoodindeed，agreatdealofsenseandknowledgeinthevolume，andsomeverytruestuff，CONTRA

Carlyle，abouttheeighteenthcentury。AhideousideacameovermethatperhapsHarrisonisnowgettingOLD。Perhapsyouare。PerhapsIam。Oh，thisinfidelitymustbestaredfirmlydown。Iamabouttwenty-three-saytwenty-eight；youaboutthirty，or，by’rlady，thirty-four；andasHarrisonbelongstothesamegeneration，thereisnogoodbotheringabouthim。

Herehasjustbeenafinealert；Igavemywifeadoseofchlorodyne。’Somethingwrong，’saysshe。’Nonsense，’saidI。’Embrocation，’saidshe。Ismeltit，and-itsmeltveryfunny。’Ithinkit’sjustgonebad，andto-morrowwilltell。’Provedtobeso。

WEDNESDAY。

HISTORYOFTUESDAY-Wokeatusualtime，verylittlework，forIwastired，andhadajobfortheevening-towritepartsforanewinstrument，aviolin。Lunch，chat，anduptomyplacetopractise；buttherewasnopractisingforme-myflageoletwasgonewrong，andIhadtotakeitalltopieces，cleanit，andputitupagain。Asthisisamostintricatejob-thethingdissolvesintoseventeenseparatemembers，mostofthesehavetobefittedontheirindividualspringsasfineasneedles，andsometimestwoatoncewiththespringsshovingdifferentways-ittookmetilltwo。ThenLloydandIrodeforthonourerrands；firsttoMotootua，wherewehadareallyinstructiveconversationonweedsandgrasses。ThencedowntoApia，whereweboughtafreshbottleofchlorodyneandconversedonpolitics。

MyvisittotheKing，whichIthoughtatthetimeaparticularlynugatoryandevenschoolboystep，andonlyconsentedtobecauseIhadheldthereinssotightovermylittlebandbefore，hasraisedadeuceofarow-newproclamation，nooneistointerviewthesacredpuppetwithoutconsuls’permission，twodays’notice，andanapprovedinterpreter-read(Isuppose)spy。Thenback；I

shouldhavesaidIwastryingthenewhorse；atallishpiebald，boughtfromthecircus；heprovedsteadyandsafe，butinverybadcondition，andnotsomuchthewildArabsteedofthedesertashadbeensupposed。Theheightofhisback，aftercommodiousJack，astonishedme，andIhadagreatconsciousnessofexerciseandfloridaction，asIpostedtohislong，emphatictrot。Wehadtoridebackeasy；evensohewashotandblown；andwhenwesetaboytoleadhimtoandfro，ourlastcharacterforsanityperished。Wereturnedjustneatfordinner；andintheeveningourviolinistarrived，ayounglady，nogreatvirtuosotruly，butplucky，industrious，andagoodreader；andweplayedfivepieceswithhugeamusement，andbrokeupatnine。ThismorningI

havereadasplendidpieceofMontaigne，writtenthispageofletter，andnowturntotheWRECKER。

WEDNESDAY-November16thor17th-andIamashamedtosaymailday。TheWRECKERisfinished，thatisthebestofmynews；itgoesbythismailtoScribner’s；andIhonestlythinkitagoodyarnonthewholeandofitsmeaslykind。

ThepartthatisgenuinelygoodisNares，theAmericansailor；thatisagenuinefigure；hadtherebeenmoreNaresitwouldhavebeenabetterbook；butofcourseitdidn’tsetuptobeabook，onlyalongtoughyarnwithsomepicturesofthemannersofto-dayinthegreaterworld-nottheshoddyshamworldofcities，clubs，andcolleges，buttheworldwheremenstillliveaman’slife。Theworstofmynewsistheinfluenza；Apiaisdevastate；theshopsclosed，aballputoff，etc。AsyetwehavenothaditatVailima，and，whoknows？wemayescape。Noneofusgodown，butofcoursetheboyscomeandgo。

Yourletterhadthemostwonderful’Itoldyouso’Ieverheardinthecourseofmylife。Why，youmadman，Iwouldn’tchangemypresentinstallationforanypost，dignity，honour，oradvantageconceivabletome。Itfillsthebill；Ihavetheloveliesttime。Andasforwarsandrumoursofwars，yousurelyknowenoughofmetobeawarethatIlikethatalsoathousandtimesbetterthandecrepitpeaceinMiddlesex？Idonotquitelikepolitics；Iamtooaristocratic，Ifear，forthat。GodknowsIdon’tcarewhoIchumwith；perhapslikesailorsbest；buttogoroundandsueandsneaktokeepacrowdtogether-never。Myimagination，whichisnottheleastdampedbytheideaofhavingmyheadcutoffinthebush，recoilsaghastfromtheideaofalifelikeGladstone’s，andtheshadowofthenewspaperchillsmetothebone。Hencemylateeruptionwasinteresting，butnotwhatI

like。Allelsesuitsmeinthis(killedamosquito)A1

abode。

Aboutpolitics。AdeterminationwascometobythePresidentthathehadbeenanidiot；emissariescametoG。andmetokissandbefriends。MymanproposedIshouldhaveapersonalinterview；Isaiditwasquiteuseless，Ihadnothingtosay；Ihadofferedhimthechancetoinformme，hadpresseditonhim，andhadbeenveryunpleasantlyreceived，andnow’Timewas。’ThenitwasdecidedthatIwastobemadeaculpritagainstGermany；theGermanCaptain-adelightfulfellowandourconstantvisitor-wrotetosaythatas’aGermanofficer’hecouldnotcomeeventosayfarewell。Weallwrotebackinthemostfriendlyspirit，tellinghim(politely)thatsomeofthesedayshewouldbesorry，andweshouldbedelightedtoseeourfriendagain。

SincethenIhaveseennoGermanshadow。