第3章

“Isthereanyonethatyouhate？“saidDanaDa。TheEnglishmansaidthattherewereseveralmenwhomhehateddeeply。

“Verygood，“saidDanaDa，uponwhomthewhiskyandtheopiumwerebeginningtotell。“Onlygivemetheirnames，andIwilldispatchaSendingtothemandkillthem。“

NowaSendingisahorriblearrangement，firstinvented，theysay，inIceland。Itisathingsentbyawizard，andmaytakeanyform，butmostgenerallywandersaboutthelandintheshapeofalittlepurplecloudtillitfindsthesendee，andhimitkillsbychangingintotheformofahorse，oracat，oramanwithoutaface。Itisnotstrictlyanativepatent，thoughchamarscan，ifirritated，dispatchaSendingwhichsitsonthebreastoftheirenemybynightandnearlykillshim。Veryfewnativescaretoirritatechamarsforthisreason。

“LetmedispatchaSending，“saidDanaDa；“Iamnearlydeadnowwithwant，anddrink，andopium；butIshouldliketokillamanbeforeIdie。IcansendaSendinganywhereyouchoose，andinanyformexceptintheshapeofaman。“

TheEnglishmanhadnofriendsthathewishedtokill，butpartlytosootheDanaDa，whoseeyeswererolling，andpartlytoseewhatwouldbedone，heaskedwhetheramodifiedSendingcouldnotbearrangedfor——suchaSendingasshouldmakeaman’slifeaburdentohim，andyetdohimnoharm。Ifthiswerepossible，henotifiedhiswillingnesstogiveDanaDatenrupeesforthejob。

“IamnotwhatIwasonce，“saidDanaDa，“andImusttakethemoneybecauseIampoor。TowhatEnglishmanshallIsendit？“

“SendaSendingtoLoneSahib，“saidtheEnglishman，namingamanwhohadbeenmostbitterinrebukinghimforhisapostasyfromtheTeacupCreed。DanaDalaughedandnodded。

“Icouldhavechosennobettermanmyself，“saidhe。“IwillseethathefindstheSendingabouthispathandabouthisbed。“

Helaydownonthehearthrug，turnedupthewhitesofhiseyes，shiveredallover，andbegantosnort。Thiswasmagic，oropium，ortheSending，orallthree。WhenheopenedhiseyeshevowedthattheSendinghadstarteduponthewarpath，andwasatthatmomentflyinguptothetownwhereLoneSahiblives。

“Givememytenrupees，“saidDanaDa，wearily，“andwritealettertoLoneSahib，tellinghim，andallwhobelievewithhim，thatyouandafriendareusingapowergreaterthantheirs。Theywillseethatyouarespeakingthetruth。“

Hedepartedunsteadily，withthepromiseofsomemorerupeesifanythingcameoftheSending。

TheEnglishmansentalettertoLoneSahib，couchedinwhatherememberedoftheterminologyofthecreed。Hewrote:“Ialso，inthedaysofwhatyouheldtobemybacksliding，haveobtainedenlightenment，andwithenlightenmenthascomepower。“Thenhegrewsodeeplymysteriousthattherecipientofthelettercouldmakeneitherheadnortailofit，andwasproportionatelyimpressed；forhefanciedthathisfriendhadbecomea“fifthrounder。“Whenamanisa“fifthrounder“hecandomorethanSladeandHoudincombined。

LoneSahibreadtheletterinfivedifferentfashions，andwasbeginningasixthinterpretation，whenhisbearerdashedinwiththenewsthattherewasacatonthebed。Now，iftherewasonethingthatLoneSahibhatedmorethananotheritwasacat。Heratedthebearerfornotturningitoutofthehouse。Thebearersaidthathewasafraid。Allthedoorsofthebedroomhadbeenshutthroughoutthemorning，andnorealcatcouldpossiblyhaveenteredtheroom。Hewouldprefernottomeddlewiththecreature。

LoneSahibenteredtheroomgingerly，andthere，onthepillowofhisbed，sprawledandwhimperedaweewhitekitten，notajumpsome，friskylittlebeast，butasluglikecrawlerwithitseyesbarelyopenedanditspawslackingstrengthordirection——akittenthatoughttohavebeeninabasketwithitsmamma。LoneSahibcaughtitbythescruffofitsneck，handeditovertothesweepertobedrowned，andfinedthebearerfourannas。

Thatevening，ashewasreadinginhisroom，hefanciedthathesawsomethingmovingaboutonthehearthrug，outsidethecircleoflightfromhisreadinglamp。Whenthethingbegantomyowl，herealizedthatitwasakitten——aweewhitekitten，nearlyblindandverymiserable。Hewasseriouslyangry，andspokebitterlytohisbearer，whosaidthattherewasnokittenintheroomwhenhebroughtinthelamp，andrealkittensoftenderagegenerallyhadmothercatsinattendance。

“IfthePresencewillgooutintotheverandaandlisten，“saidthebearer，“hewillhearnocats。How，therefore，canthekittenonthebedandthekittenonthehearthrugberealkittens？“

LoneSahibwentouttolisten，andthebearerfollowedhim，buttherewasnosoundofRachelmewingforherchildren。Hereturnedtohisroom，havinghurledthekittendownthehillside，andwroteouttheincidentsofthedayforthebenefitofhiscoreligionists。

Thosepeopleweresoabsolutelyfreefromsuperstitionthattheyascribedanythingalittleoutofthecommontoagencies。Asitwastheirbusinesstoknowallabouttheagencies，theywereontermsofalmostindecentfamiliaritywithmanifestationsofeverykind。Theirlettersdroppedfromtheceiling——un-stamped——andspiritsusedtosquatterupanddowntheirstaircasesallnight。

Buttheyhadnevercomeintocontactwithkittens。LoneSahibwroteoutthefacts，notingthehourandtheminute，aseverypsychicalobserverisboundtodo，andappendingtheEnglishman’sletterbecauseitwasthemostmysteriousdocumentandmighthavehadabearinguponanythinginthisworldorthenext。Anoutsiderwouldhavetranslatedallthetanglethus:“Lookout！Youlaughedatmeonce，andnowIamgoingtomakeyousitup。“

LoneSahib’scoreligionistsfoundthatmeaninginit；buttheirtranslationwasrefinedandfulloffour-syllablewords。Theyheldasederunt，andwerefilledwithtremulousjoy，for，inspiteoftheirfamiliaritywithalltheotherworldsandcycles，theyhadaveryhumanaweofthingssentfromghostland。TheymetinLoneSahib’sroominshroudedandsepulchralgloom，andtheirconclavewasbrokenupbyaclinkingamongthephotoframesonthemantelpiece。Aweewhitekitten，nearlyblind，wasloopingandwrithingitselfbetweentheclockandthecandlesticks。Thatstoppedallinvestigationsordoubtings。Herewasthemanifestationintheflesh。Itwas，sofarascouldbeseen，devoidofpurpose，butitwasamanifestationofundoubtedauthenticity。

TheydraftedaroundrobintotheEnglishman，thebacksliderofolddays，adjuringhimintheinterestsofthecreedtoexplainwhethertherewasanyconnectionbetweentheembodimentofsomeEgyptiangodorother(Ihaveforgottenthename)andhiscommunication。

TheycalledthekittenRa，orToth，orShem，orNoah，orsomething；

andwhenLoneSahibconfessedthatthefirstonehad，athismostmisguidedinstance，beendrownedbythesweeper，theysaidconsolinglythatinhisnextlifehewouldbea“bounder，“andnotevena“rounder“ofthelowestgrade。Thesewordsmaynotbequitecorrect，buttheyexpressthesenseofthehouseaccurately。

WhentheEnglishmanreceivedtheroundrobin——itcamebypost——hewasstartledandbewildered。HesentintothebazaarforDanaDa，whoreadtheletterandlaughed。“ThatismySending，“saidhe。

“ItoldyouIwouldworkwell。Nowgivemeanothertenrupees。“

“ButwhatintheworldisthisgibberishaboutEgyptiangods？“

askedtheEnglishman。

“Cats，“saidDanaDa，withahiccough，forhehaddiscoveredtheEnglishman’swhiskybottle。“Catsandcatsandcats！NeverwassuchaSending。Ahundredofcats。NowgivemetenmorerupeesandwriteasIdictate。“

DanaDa’sletterwasacuriosity。ItboretheEnglishman’ssignature，andhintedatcats——ataSendingofcats。Themerewordsonpaperwerecreepyanduncannytobehold。

“Whathaveyoudone，though？“saidtheEnglishman；“Iamasmuchinthedarkasever。DoyoumeantosaythatyoucanactuallysendthisabsurdSendingyoutalkabout？“

“Judgeforyourself，“saidDanaDa。“Whatdoesthatlettermean？

Inalittletimetheywillallbeatmyfeetandyours，andI，oh，glory！willbedruggedordrunkalldaylong。“

DanaDaknewhispeople。

Whenamanwhohatescatswakesupinthemorningandfindsalittlesquirmingkittenonhisbreast，orputshishandintohisulsterpocketandfindsalittlehalf-deadkittenwherehisglovesshouldbe，oropenshistrunkandfindsavilekittenamonghisdressshirts，orgoesforalongridewithhismackintoshstrappedonhissaddle-bowandshakesalittlesprawlingkittenfromitsfoldswhenheopensit，orgoesouttodinnerandfindsalittleblindkittenunderhischair，orstaysathomeandfindsawrithingkittenunderthequilt，orwrigglingamonghisboots，orhanging，headdownward，inhistobaccojar，orbeingmangledbyhisterrierintheveranda——whensuchamanfindsonekitten，neithermorenorless，onceadayinaplacewherenokittenrightlycouldorshouldbe，heisnaturallyupset。Whenhedarenotmurderhisdailytrovebecausehebelievesittobeamanifestation，anemissary，anembodiment，andhalfadozenotherthingsalloutoftheregularcourseofnature，heismorethanupset。Heisactuallydistressed。SomeofLoneSahib’scoreligioniststhoughtthathewasahighlyfavoredindividual；butmanysaidthatifhehadtreatedthefirstkittenwithproperrespect——assuitedaToth-RaTum-SennacheribEmbodiment——allhistroublewouldhavebeenaverted。TheycomparedhimtotheAncientMariner，butnonethelesstheywereproudofhimandproudoftheEnglishmanwhohadsentthemanifestation。TheydidnotcallitaSendingbecauseIcelandicmagicwasnotintheirprogramme。

Aftersixteenkittens——thatistosay，afteronefortnight，fortherewerethreekittensonthefirstdaytoimpressthefactoftheSending，thewholecampwasupliftedbyaletter——itcameflyingthroughawindow——fromtheOldManoftheMountains——theheadofallthecreed——explainingthemanifestationinthemostbeautifullanguageandsoakingupallthecreditofitforhimself。

TheEnglishman，saidtheletter，wasnotthereatall。Hewasabacksliderwithoutpowerorasceticism，whocouldn’tevenraiseatablebyforceofvolition，muchlessprojectanarmyofkittensthroughspace。Theentirearrangement，saidtheletter，wasstrictlyorthodox，workedandsanctionedbythehighestauthoritieswithinthepaleofthecreed。Therewasgreatjoyatthis，forsomeoftheweakerbrethrenseeingthatanoutsiderwhohadbeenworkingonindependentlinescouldcreatekittens，whereastheirownrulershadnevergonebeyondcrockery——andbrokenatthat——wereshowingadesiretobreaklineontheirowntrail。Infact，therewasthepromiseofaschism。AsecondroundrobinwasdraftedtotheEnglishman，beginning:“Oh，Scoffer，“andendingwithaselectionofcursesfromtheritesofMizraimandMemphisandtheComminationofJugana；whowasa“fifthrounder，“uponwhosenameanupstart“thirdrounder“oncetraded。Apapalexcommunicationisabillet-douxcomparedtotheComminationofJugana。TheEnglishmanhadbeenprovedunderthehandandsealoftheOldManoftheMountainstohaveappropriatedvirtueandpretendedtohavepowerwhich，inreality，belongedonlytothesupremehead。