第5章

AndSukeycomesbouncingawayfromaknotofoldschool-fellows，anddropsacurtseytoMr。Benjamin。AndelderscomeupfromallpartstosaluteBenjy，andgirlswhohavebeenmadam’spupilstokissMasterTom。Andtheycarryhimofftoloadhimwithfairings；andhereturnstoBenjy，hishatandcoatcoveredwithribbons，andhispocketscrammedwithwonderfulboxeswhichopenuponevernewboxes，andpopguns，andtrumpets，andapples，andgiltgingerbreadfromthestallofAngelHeavens，solevenderthereof，whoseboothgroanswithkingsandqueens，andelephantsandprancingsteeds，allgleamingwithgold。TherewasmoregoldonAngel’scakesthanthereisgingerinthoseofthisdegenerateage。SkilleddiggersmightyetmakeafortuneinthechurchyardsoftheVale，bycarefullywashingthedustoftheconsumersofAngel’sgingerbread。Alas！heiswithhisnamesakes，andhisreceiptshave，Ifear，diedwithhim。

Andthentheyinspectthepennypeep-show——atleastTomdoes——

whileoldBenjystandsoutsideandgossipsandwalksupthesteps，andentersthemysteriousdoorsofthepink-eyedladyandtheIrishgiant，whodonotbyanymeanscomeuptotheirpictures；andtheboawillnotswallowhisrabbit，buttheretherabbitiswaitingtobeswallowed；andwhatcanyouexpectfortuppence？WeareeasilypleasedintheVale。Nowthereisarushofthecrowd，andatinklingbellisheard，andshoutsoflaughter；andMasterTommountsonBenjy’sshoulders，andbeholdsajinglingmatchinallitsglory。Thegamesarebegun，andthisistheopeningofthem。Itisaquaintgame，immenselyamusingtolookat；andasIdon’tknowwhetheritisusedinyourcounties，Ihadbetterdescribeit。Alargeropedringismade，intowhichareintroducedadozenorsoofbigboysandyoungmenwhomeantoplay；thesearecarefullyblindedandturnedlooseintothering，andthenamanisintroducednotblindfolded；withabellhungroundhisneck，andhistwohandstiedbehindhim。Ofcourseeverytimehemovesthebellmustring，ashehasnohandtoholdit；andsothedozenblindfoldedmenhavetocatchhim。Thistheycannotalwaysmanageifheisalivelyfellow，buthalfofthemalwaysrushintothearmsoftheotherhalf，ordrivetheirheadstogether，ortumbleover；

andthenthecrowdlaughsvehemently，andinventsnicknamesforthemonthespurofthemoment；andthey，iftheybecholeric，tearoffthehandkerchiefswhichblindthem，andnotunfrequentlypitchintooneanother，eachthinkingthattheothermusthaverunagainsthimonpurpose。Itisgreatfuntolookatajinglingmatchcertainly，andTomshoutsandjumpsonoldBenjy’sshouldersatthesight，untiltheoldmanfeelsweary，andshiftshimtothestrongyoungshouldersofthegroom，whohasjustgotdowntothefun。

Andnow，whiletheyareclimbingthepoleinanotherpartofthefield，andmuzzlinginaflour-tubinanother，theoldfarmerwhosehouse，ashasbeensaid，overlooksthefield，andwhoismasteroftherevels，getsupthestepsontothestage，andannouncestoallwhomitmayconcernthatahalf-sovereigninmoneywillbeforthcomingtotheoldgamesterwhobreaksmostheads；towhichtheSquireandhehaveaddedanewhat。

Theamountoftheprizeissufficienttostimulatethemenoftheimmediateneighbourhood，butnotenoughtobringanyveryhightalentfromadistance；so，afteraglanceortworound，atallfellow，whoisadownshepherd，chuckshishatontothestageandclimbsupthesteps，lookingrathersheepish。Thecrowd，ofcourse，firstcheer，andthenchaffasusual，ashepicksuphishatandbeginshandlingthestickstoseewhichwillsuithim。

“Wooy，WillumSmith，theecanstplaaywi’hearradaay，“sayshiscompaniontotheblacksmith’sapprentice，astoutyoungfellowofnineteenortwenty。Willum’ssweetheartisinthe“veast“somewhere，andhasstrictlyenjoinedhimnottogethisheadbrokeatback-swording，onpainofherhighestdispleasure；

butassheisnottobeseen(thewomenpretendnottoliketoseethebackswordplay，andkeepawayfromthestage)，andashishatisdecidedlygettingold，hechucksitontothestage，andfollowshimself，hopingthathewillonlyhavetobreakotherpeople’sheads，orthat，afterall，Rachelwon’treallymind。

Thenfollowsthegreasycaplinedwithfurofahalf-gipsy，poaching，loafingfellow，whotravelstheValenotformuchgood，Ifancy:

“FortwentytimeswasPeterfearedForoncethatPeterwasrespected，“

infact。Andthenthreeorfourotherhats，includingtheglossycastorofJoeWillis，theself-electedandwould-bechampionoftheneighbourhood，awell-to-doyoungbutcheroftwenty-eightorthereabouts，andagreatstrappingfellow，withhisfullallowanceofbluster。Thisisacapitalshowofgamesters，consideringtheamountoftheprize；so，whiletheyarepickingtheirsticksanddrawingtheirlots，IthinkImusttellyou，asshortlyasIcan，howthenobleoldgameofback-

swordisplayed；foritissadlygoneoutoflate，evenintheVale，andmaybeyouhaveneverseenit。

Theweaponisagoodstoutashstickwithalargebaskethandle，heavierandsomewhatshorterthanacommonsingle-stick。Theplayersarecalled“oldgamesters“——why，Ican’ttellyou——andtheirobjectissimplytobreakoneanother’sheads；forthemomentthatbloodrunsaninchanywhereabovetheeyebrow，theoldgamestertowhomitbelongsisbeaten，andhastostop。A

veryslightblowwiththestickswillfetchblood，sothatitisbynomeansapunishingpastime，ifthemendon’tplayonpurposeandsavagelyatthebodyandarmsoftheiradversaries。

Theoldgamestergoingintoactiononlytakesoffhishatandcoat，andarmshimselfwithastick；hethenloopsthefingersofhislefthandinahandkerchieforstrap，whichhefastensroundhisleftleg，measuringthelength，sothatwhenhedrawsittightwithhisleftelbowintheair，thatelbowshalljustreachashighashiscrown。Thusyousee，solongashechoosestokeephisleftelbowup，regardlessofcuts，hehasaperfectguardfortheleftsideofhishead。Thenheadvanceshisrighthandaboveandinfrontofhishead，holdinghisstickacross，sothatitspointprojectsaninchortwooverhisleftelbow；

andthushiswholeheadiscompletelyguarded，andhefaceshismanarmedinlikemanner；andtheystandsomethreefeetapart，oftennearer，andfeint，andstrike，andreturnatoneanother’sheads，untilonecries“hold，“orbloodflows。Inthefirstcasetheyareallowedaminute’stime；andgoonagain；inthelatteranotherpairofgamestersarecalledon。Ifgoodmenareplaying，thequicknessofthereturnsismarvellous:youheartherattlelikethataboymakesdrawinghisstickalongpalings，onlyheavier；andtheclosenessofthemeninactiontooneanothergivesitastrangeinterest，andmakesaspellatback-swordingaverynoblesight。

Theyareallsuitednowwithsticks，andJoeWillisandthegipsymanhavedrawnthefirstlot。Sotherestleanagainsttherailsofthestage，andJoeandthedarkmanmeetinthemiddle，theboardshavingbeenstrewedwithsawdust，Joe’swhiteshirtandspotlessdrabbreechesandbootscontrastingwiththegipsy’scoarseblueshirtanddirtygreenvelveteenbreechesandleathergaiters。Joeisevidentlyturninguphisnoseattheother，andhalfinsultedathavingtobreakhishead。

Thegipsyisatough，activefellow，butnotveryskilfulwithhisweapon，sothatJoe’sweightandstrengthtellinaminute；

heistooheavymetalforhim。Whack，whack，whack，comehisblows，breakingdownthegipsy’sguard，andthreateningtoreachhisheadeverymoment。Thereitisatlast。“Blood，blood！“

shoutthespectators，asathinstreamoozesoutslowlyfromtherootsofhishair，andtheumpirecallstothemtostop。ThegipsyscowlsatJoeunderhisbrowsinnopleasantmanner，whileMasterJoeswaggersabout，andmakesattitudes，andthinkshimself，andshowsthathethinkshimself，thegreatestmaninthefield。

Thenfollowseveralstoutsets-tobetweentheothercandidatesforthenewhat，andatlastcometheshepherdandWillumSmith。

Thisisthecrackset-tooftheday。Theyarebothinfamouswind，andthereisnocrying“hold。“Theshepherdisanoldhand，anduptoallthedodges。Hetriesthemoneafteranother，andverynearlygetsatWillum’sheadbycominginnear，andplayingoverhisguardatthehalf-stick；butsomehowWillumblundersthrough，catchingthestickonhisshoulders，neck，sides，everynowandthen，anywherebutonhishead，andhisreturnsareheavyandstraight，andheistheyoungestgamesterandafavouriteintheparish，andhisgallantstandbringsdownshoutsandcheers，andtheknowingonesthinkhe’llwinifhekeepssteady；andTom，onthegroom’sshoulder，holdshishandstogether，andcanhardlybreatheforexcitement。

AlasforWillum！Hissweetheart，gettingtiredoffemalecompanionship，hasbeenhuntingtheboothstoseewherehecanhavegotto，andnowcatchessightofhimonthestageinfullcombat。Sheflushesandturnspale；heroldauntcatchesholdofher，saying，“Bless’ee，child，doan’t’eegoa’nigstit；“

butshebreaksawayandrunstowardsthestagecallinghisname。

Willumkeepsuphisguardstoutly，butglancesforamomenttowardsthevoice。Noguardwilldoit，Willum，withouttheeye。Theshepherdstepsroundandstrikes，andthepointofhisstickjustgrazesWillum’sforehead，fetchingofftheskin，andthebloodflows，andtheumpirecries，“Hold！“andpoorWillum’schanceisupfortheday。Buthetakesitverywell，andputsonhisoldhatandcoat，andgoesdowntobescoldedbyhissweetheart，andledawayoutofmischief。Tomhearshimsaycoaxingly，ashewalksoff，-

“Nowdoan’t’ee，Rachel！Iwouldn’tha’doneit，onlyIwantedsummuttobuy’eeafairingwi’，andIbeasvlusho’moneyasatwodo’feathers。“

“TheemindwhatItells’ee，“rejoinsRachelsaucily，“anddoan’t’eekepbletheringaboutfairings。“

TomresolvesinhishearttogiveWillumtheremainderofhistwoshillingsaftertheback-swording。

JoeWillishasalltheluckto-day。Hisnextboutendsinaneasyvictory，whiletheshepherdhasatoughjobtobreakhissecondhead；andwhenJoeandtheshepherdmeet，andthewholecircleexpectandhopetoseehimgetabrokencrown，theshepherdslipsinthefirstroundandfallsagainsttherails，hurtinghimselfsothattheoldfarmerwillnotlethimgoon，muchashewishestotry；andthatimpostorJoe(forheiscertainlynotthebestman)strutsandswaggersaboutthestagetheconqueringgamester，thoughhehasn’thadfiveminutes’

reallytryingplay。

Joetakesthenewhatinhishand，andputsthemoneyintoit，andthen，asifathoughtstrikeshim，andhedoesn’tthinkhisvictoryquiteacknowledgeddownbelow，walkstoeachfaceofthestage，andlooksdown，shakingthemoney，andchaffing，ashowhe’llstakehatandmoneyandanotherhalf-sovereign“aginanygamesterashasn’tplayedalready。“CunningJoe！hethusgetsridofWillumandtheshepherd，whoisquitefreshagain。

Nooneseemstoliketheoffer，andtheumpireisjustcomingdown，whenaqueeroldhat，somethinglikeadoctorofdivinity’sshovel，ischuckedontothestageandanelderly，quietmanstepsout，whohasbeenwatchingtheplay，sayingheshouldliketocrossastickwi’theprodigalishyoungchap。