第1章

CHAPTERI。

Whentheporter’swife（sheusedtoanswerthehouse—bell），announced"Agentleman——withalady，sir，"Ihad，asIoftenhadinthosedays，forthewishwasfathertothethought，animmediatevisionofsitters。Sittersmyvisitorsinthiscaseprovedtobe；butnotinthesenseIshouldhavepreferred。However，therewasnothingatfirsttoindicatethattheymightnothavecomeforaportrait。Thegentleman，amanoffifty，veryhighandverystraight，withamoustacheslightlygrizzledandadarkgreywalking—coatadmirablyfitted，bothofwhichInotedprofessionally——Idon’tmeanasabarberoryetasatailor——wouldhavestruckmeasacelebrityifcelebritiesoftenwerestriking。ItwasatruthofwhichIhadforsometimebeenconsciousthatafigurewithagooddealoffrontagewas，asonemightsay，almostneverapublicinstitution。Aglanceattheladyhelpedtoremindmeofthisparadoxicallaw:shealsolookedtoodistinguishedtobea"personality。"Moreoveronewouldscarcelycomeacrosstwovariationstogether。

Neitherofthepairspokeimmediately——theyonlyprolongedthepreliminarygazewhichsuggestedthateachwishedtogivetheotherachance。Theywerevisiblyshy；theystoodtherelettingmetakethemin——which，asIafterwardsperceived，wasthemostpracticalthingtheycouldhavedone。Inthiswaytheirembarrassmentservedtheircause。Ihadseenpeoplepainfullyreluctanttomentionthattheydesiredanythingsogrossastoberepresentedoncanvas；butthescruplesofmynewfriendsappearedalmostinsurmountable。Yetthegentlemanmighthavesaid"Ishouldlikeaportraitofmywife，"andtheladymighthavesaid"Ishouldlikeaportraitofmyhusband。"

Perhapstheywerenothusbandandwife——thisnaturallywouldmakethemattermoredelicate。Perhapstheywishedtobedonetogether——inwhichcasetheyoughttohavebroughtathirdpersontobreakthenews。

"WecomefromMr。Rivet，"theladysaidatlast，withadimsmilewhichhadtheeffectofamoistspongepassedovera"sunk"pieceofpainting，aswellasofavagueallusiontovanishedbeauty。Shewasastallandstraight，inherdegree，ashercompanion，andwithtenyearslesstocarry。Shelookedassadasawomancouldlookwhosefacewasnotchargedwithexpression；thatishertintedovalmaskshowedfrictionasanexposedsurfaceshowsit。Thehandoftimehadplayedoverherfreely，butonlytosimplify。Shewasslimandstiff，andsowell—dressed，indarkbluecloth，withlappetsandpocketsandbuttons，thatitwasclearsheemployedthesametailorasherhusband。Thecouplehadanindefinableairofprosperousthrift——theyevidentlygotagooddealofluxuryfortheirmoney。IfIwastobeoneoftheirluxuriesitwouldbehovemetoconsidermyterms。

"Ah，ClaudeRivetrecommendedme？"Iinquired；andIaddedthatitwasverykindofhim，thoughIcouldreflectthat，asheonlypaintedlandscape，thiswasnotasacrifice。

Theladylookedveryhardatthegentleman，andthegentlemanlookedroundtheroom。Thenstaringattheflooramomentandstrokinghismoustache，herestedhispleasanteyesonmewiththeremark:

"Hesaidyouweretherightone。"

"Itrytobe，whenpeoplewanttosit。"

"Yes，weshouldliketo，"saidtheladyanxiously。

"Doyoumeantogether？"

Myvisitorsexchangedaglance。"IfyoucoulddoanythingwithME，I

supposeitwouldbedouble，"thegentlemanstammered。

"Ohyes，there’snaturallyahigherchargefortwofiguresthanforone。"

"Weshouldliketomakeitpay，"thehusbandconfessed。

"That’sverygoodofyou，"Ireturned，appreciatingsounwontedasympathy——forIsupposedhemeantpaytheartist。

Asenseofstrangenessseemedtodawnonthelady。"Wemeanfortheillustrations——MrRivetsaidyoumightputonein。"

"Putonein——anillustration？"Iwasequallyconfused。

"Sketchheroff，youknow，"saidthegentleman，colouring。

ItwasonlythenthatIunderstoodtheserviceClaudeRivethadrenderedme；hehadtoldthemthatIworkedinblackandwhite，formagazines，forstory—books，forsketchesofcontemporarylife，andconsequentlyhadfrequentemploymentformodels。Thesethingsweretrue，butitwasnotlesstrue（Imayconfessitnow——whetherbecausetheaspirationwastoleadtoeverythingortonothingIleavethereadertoguess），thatIcouldn’tgetthehonours，tosaynothingoftheemoluments，ofagreatpainterofportraitsoutofmyhead。My"illustrations"weremypot—boilers；Ilookedtoadifferentbranchofart（farandawaythemostinterestingithadalwaysseemedtome），toperpetuatemyfame。Therewasnoshameinlookingtoitalsotomakemyfortune；butthatfortunewasbysomuchfurtherfrombeingmadefromthemomentmyvisitorswishedtobe"done"fornothing。Iwasdisappointed；forinthepictorialsenseIhadimmediatelySEENthem。Ihadseizedtheirtype——IhadalreadysettledwhatIwoulddowithit。Somethingthatwouldn’tabsolutelyhavepleasedthem，Iafterwardsreflected。

"Ah，you’re——you’re——a——？"Ibegan，assoonasIhadmasteredmysurprise。Icouldn’tbringoutthedingyword"models"；itseemedtofitthecasesolittle。

"Wehaven’thadmuchpractice，"saidthelady。

"We’vegottoDOsomething，andwe’vethoughtthatanartistinyourlinemightperhapsmakesomethingofus，"herhusbandthrewoff。Hefurthermentionedthattheydidn’tknowmanyartistsandthattheyhadgonefirst，ontheoff—chance（hepaintedviewsofcourse，butsometimesputinfigures——perhapsIremembered），toMr。Rivet，whomtheyhadmetafewyearsbeforeataplaceinNorfolkwherehewassketching。

"Weusedtosketchalittleourselves，"theladyhinted。

"It’sveryawkward，butweabsolutelyMUSTdosomething，"herhusbandwenton。

"Ofcourse，we’renotsoVERYyoung，"sheadmitted，withawansmile。

WiththeremarkthatImightaswellknowsomethingmoreaboutthem，thehusbandhadhandedmeacardextractedfromaneatnewpocket—

book（theirappurtenanceswereallofthefreshest）andinscribedwiththewords"MajorMonarch。"Impressiveasthesewordsweretheydidn’tcarrymyknowledgemuchfurther；butmyvisitorpresentlyadded:"I’veleftthearmy，andwe’vehadthemisfortunetoloseourmoney。Infactourmeansaredreadfullysmall。"

"It’sanawfulbore，"saidMrs。Monarch。

Theyevidentlywishedtobediscreet——totakecarenottoswaggerbecausetheyweregentlefolks。Iperceivedtheywouldhavebeenwillingtorecognisethisassomethingofadrawback，atthesametimethatIguessedatanunderlyingsense——theirconsolationinadversity——thattheyHADtheirpoints。Theycertainlyhad；buttheseadvantagesstruckmeaspreponderantlysocial；suchforinstanceaswouldhelptomakeadrawing—roomlookwell。However，adrawing—roomwasalways，oroughttobe，apicture。

Inconsequenceofhiswife’sallusiontotheirageMajorMonarchobserved:"Naturally，it’smoreforthefigurethatwethoughtofgoingin。Wecanstillholdourselvesup。"OntheinstantIsawthatthefigurewasindeedtheirstrongpoint。His"naturally"

didn’tsoundvain，butitlightedupthequestion。"SHEhasgotthebest，"hecontinued，noddingathiswife，withapleasantafter—

dinnerabsenceofcircumlocution。Icouldonlyreply，asifwewereinfactsittingoverourwine，thatthisdidn’tpreventhisownfrombeingverygood；whichledhiminturntorejoin:"Wethoughtthatifyoueverhavetodopeoplelikeus，wemightbesomethinglikeit。

SHE，particularly——foraladyinabook，youknow。"

Iwassoamusedbythemthat，togetmoreofit，Ididmybesttotaketheirpointofview；andthoughitwasanembarrassmenttofindmyselfappraisingphysically，asiftheywereanimalsonhireorusefulblacks，apairwhomIshouldhaveexpectedtomeetonlyinoneoftherelationsinwhichcriticismistacit，IlookedatMrs。

Monarchjudiciallyenoughtobeabletoexclaim，afteramoment，withconviction:"Ohyes，aladyinabook！"Shewassingularlylikeabadillustration。

"We’llstandup，ifyoulike，"saidtheMajor；andheraisedhimselfbeforemewithareallygrandair。

Icouldtakehismeasureataglance——hewassixfeettwoandaperfectgentleman。Itwouldhavepaidanyclubinprocessofformationandinwantofastamptoengagehimatasalarytostandintheprincipalwindow。Whatstruckmeimmediatelywasthatincomingtometheyhadrathermissedtheirvocation；theycouldsurelyhavebeenturnedtobetteraccountforadvertisingpurposes。I

couldn’tofcourseseethethingindetail，butIcouldseethemmakesomeone’sfortune——Idon’tmeantheirown。Therewassomethinginthemforawaistcoat—maker，anhotel—keeperorasoap—vendor。I

couldimagine"Wealwaysuseit"pinnedontheirbosomswiththegreatesteffect；Ihadavisionofthepromptitudewithwhichtheywouldlaunchatabled’hote。

Mrs。Monarchsatstill，notfrompridebutfromshyness，andpresentlyherhusbandsaidtoher:"Getupmydearandshowhowsmartyouare。"Sheobeyed，butshehadnoneedtogetuptoshowit。Shewalkedtotheendofthestudio，andthenshecamebackblushing，withherflutteredeyesonherhusband。IwasremindedofanincidentIhadaccidentallyhadaglimpseofinParis——beingwithafriendthere，adramatistabouttoproduceaplay——whenanactresscametohimtoasktobeintrustedwithapart。Shewentthroughherpacesbeforehim，walkedupanddownasMrs。Monarchwasdoing。Mrs。

Monarchdiditquiteaswell，butIabstainedfromapplauding。Itwasveryoddtoseesuchpeopleapplyforsuchpoorpay。Shelookedasifshehadtenthousandayear。Herhusbandhadusedthewordthatdescribedher:shewas，intheLondoncurrentjargon，essentiallyandtypically"smart。"Herfigurewas，inthesameorderofideas，conspicuouslyandirreproachably"good。"Forawomanofherageherwaistwassurprisinglysmall；herelbowmoreoverhadtheorthodoxcrook。Sheheldherheadattheconventionalangle；butwhydidshecometoME？Sheoughttohavetriedonjacketsatabigshop。Ifearedmyvisitorswerenotonlydestitute，but"artistic"——

whichwouldbeagreatcomplication。WhenshesatdownagainI

thankedher，observingthatwhatadraughtsmanmostvaluedinhismodelwasthefacultyofkeepingquiet。

"Oh，SHEcankeepquiet，"saidMajorMonarch。Thenheadded，jocosely:"I’vealwayskeptherquiet。"

"I’mnotanastyfidget，amI？"Mrs。Monarchappealedtoherhusband。

Headdressedhisanswertome。"Perhapsitisn’toutofplacetomention——becauseweoughttobequitebusiness—like，oughtn’twe？——

thatwhenImarriedhershewasknownastheBeautifulStatue。"

"Ohdear！"saidMrs。Monarch，ruefully。

"OfcourseIshouldwantacertainamountofexpression，"Irejoined。

"OfCOURSE！"theybothexclaimed。

"AndthenIsupposeyouknowthatyou’llgetawfullytired。"

"Oh，weNEVERgettired！"theyeagerlycried。

"Haveyouhadanykindofpractice？"

Theyhesitated——theylookedateachother。"We’vebeenphotographed，IMMENSELY，"saidMrs。Monarch。

"Shemeansthefellowshaveaskedus，"addedtheMajor。

"Isee——becauseyou’resogood—looking。"

"Idon’tknowwhattheythought，buttheywerealwaysafterus。"

"Wealwaysgotourphotographsfornothing，"smiledMrs。Monarch。

"Wemighthavebroughtsome，mydear，"herhusbandremarked。

"I’mnotsurewehaveanyleft。We’vegivenquantitiesaway，"sheexplainedtome。

"Withourautographsandthatsortofthing，"saidtheMajor。

"Aretheytobegotintheshops？"Iinquired，asaharmlesspleasantry。

"Oh，yes；hers——theyusedtobe。"

"Notnow，"saidMrs。Monarch，withhereyesonthefloor。

CHAPTERII。

Icouldfancythe"sortofthing"theyputonthepresentation—copiesoftheirphotographs，andIwassuretheywroteabeautifulhand。ItwasoddhowquicklyIwassureofeverythingthatconcernedthem。Iftheywerenowsopoorastohavetoearnshillingsandpence，theyneverhadhadmuchofamargin。Theirgoodlookshadbeentheircapital，andtheyhadgood—humouredlymadethemostofthecareerthatthisresourcemarkedoutforthem。Itwasintheirfaces，theblankness，thedeepintellectualreposeofthetwentyyearsofcountry—housevisitingwhichhadgiventhempleasantintonations。I

couldseethesunnydrawing—rooms，sprinkledwithperiodicalsshedidn’tread，inwhichMrs。Monarchhadcontinuouslysat；Icouldseethewetshrubberiesinwhichshehadwalked，equippedtoadmirationforeitherexercise。IcouldseetherichcoverstheMajorhadhelpedtoshootandthewonderfulgarmentsinwhich，lateatnight，herepairedtothesmoking—roomtotalkaboutthem。Icouldimaginetheirleggingsandwaterproofs，theirknowingtweedsandrugs，theirrollsofsticksandcasesoftackleandneatumbrellas；andIcouldevoketheexactappearanceoftheirservantsandthecompactvarietyoftheirluggageontheplatformsofcountrystations。

Theygavesmalltips，buttheywereliked；theydidn’tdoanythingthemselves，buttheywerewelcome。Theylookedsowelleverywhere；

theygratifiedthegeneralrelishforstature，complexionand"form。"

Theyknewitwithoutfatuityorvulgarity，andtheyrespectedthemselvesinconsequence。Theywerenotsuperficial；theywerethoroughandkeptthemselvesup——ithadbeentheirline。Peoplewithsuchatasteforactivityhadtohavesomeline。Icouldfeelhow，eveninadullhouse，theycouldhavebeencounteduponforcheerfulness。Atpresentsomethinghadhappened——itdidn’tmatterwhat，theirlittleincomehadgrownless，ithadgrownleast——andtheyhadtodosomethingforpocket—money。Theirfriendslikedthem，butdidn’tliketosupportthem。Therewassomethingaboutthemthatrepresentedcredit——theirclothes，theirmanners，theirtype；butifcreditisalargeemptypocketinwhichanoccasionalchinkreverberates，thechinkatleastmustbeaudible。Whattheywantedofmewastohelptomakeitso。Fortunatelytheyhadnochildren——I

soondivinedthat。Theywouldalsoperhapswishourrelationstobekeptsecret:thiswaswhyitwas"forthefigure"——thereproductionofthefacewouldbetraythem。

Ilikedthem——theyweresosimple；andIhadnoobjectiontothemiftheywouldsuit。But，somehow，withalltheirperfectionsIdidn’teasilybelieveinthem。Afteralltheywereamateurs，andtherulingpassionofmylifewasthedetestationoftheamateur。Combinedwiththiswasanotherperversity——aninnatepreferencefortherepresentedsubjectovertherealone:thedefectoftherealonewassoapttobealackofrepresentation。Ilikedthingsthatappeared；thenonewassure。WhethertheyWEREornotwasasubordinateandalmostalwaysaprofitlessquestion。Therewereotherconsiderations，thefirstofwhichwasthatIalreadyhadtwoorthreepeopleinuse，notablyayoungpersonwithbigfeet，inalpaca，fromKilburn，whoforacoupleofyearshadcometomeregularlyformyillustrationsandwithwhomIwasstill——perhapsignobly——satisfied。Ifranklyexplainedtomyvisitorshowthecasestood；buttheyhadtakenmoreprecautionsthanIsupposed。Theyhadreasonedouttheiropportunity，forClaudeRivethadtoldthemoftheprojectededitiondeluxeofoneofthewritersofourday——therarestofthenovelists——who，longneglectedbythemultitudinousvulgaranddearlyprizedbytheattentive（needImentionPhilipVincent？）hadhadthehappyfortuneofseeing，lateinlife，thedawnandthenthefulllightofahighercriticism——anestimateinwhich，onthepartofthepublic，therewassomethingreallyofexpiation。Theeditioninquestion，plannedbyapublisheroftaste，waspracticallyanactofhighreparation；thewood—cutswithwhichitwastobeenrichedwerethehomageofEnglisharttooneofthemostindependentrepresentativesofEnglishletters。MajorandMrs。MonarchconfessedtomethattheyhadhopedImightbeabletoworkTHEMintomyshareoftheenterprise。TheyknewIwastodothefirstofthebooks，"RutlandRamsay，"butIhadtomakecleartothemthatmyparticipationintherestoftheaffair——thisfirstbookwastobeatest——wastodependonthesatisfactionIshouldgive。Ifthisshouldbelimitedmyemployerswoulddropmewithoutascruple。Itwasthereforeacrisisforme，andnaturallyIwasmakingspecialpreparations，lookingaboutfornewpeople，iftheyshouldbenecessary，andsecuringthebesttypes。IadmittedhoweverthatI

shouldliketosettledowntotwoorthreegoodmodelswhowoulddoforeverything。

"Shouldwehaveoftento——a——putonspecialclothes？"Mrs。Monarchtimidlydemanded。

"Dear，yes——that’shalfthebusiness。"

"Andshouldwebeexpectedtosupplyourowncostumes？"

"Oh，no；I’vegotalotofthings。Apainter’smodelsputon——orputoff——anythinghelikes。"

"Anddoyoumean——a——thesame？"

"Thesame？"

Mrs。Monarchlookedatherhusbandagain。

"Oh，shewasjustwondering，"heexplained，"ifthecostumesareinGENERALuse。"Ihadtoconfessthattheywere，andImentionedfurtherthatsomeofthem（Ihadalotofgenuine，greasylast—

centurythings），hadservedtheirtime，ahundredyearsago，onliving，world—stainedmenandwomen。"We’llputonanythingthatfits，"saidtheMajor。

"Oh，Iarrangethat——theyfitinthepictures。"

"I’mafraidIshoulddobetterforthemodernbooks。Iwouldcomeasyoulike，"saidMrs。Monarch。

"Shehasgotalotofclothesathome:theymightdoforcontemporarylife，"herhusbandcontinued。

"Oh，Icanfancyscenesinwhichyou’dbequitenatural。"AndindeedIcouldseetheslipshodrearrangementsofstaleproperties——thestoriesItriedtoproducepicturesforwithouttheexasperationofreadingthem——whosesandytractsthegoodladymighthelptopeople。

ButIhadtoreturntothefactthatforthissortofwork——thedailymechanicalgrind——Iwasalreadyequipped；thepeopleIwasworkingwithwerefullyadequate。

"WeonlythoughtwemightbemorelikeSOMEcharacters，"saidMrs。

Monarchmildly，gettingup。

Herhusbandalsorose；hestoodlookingatmewithadimwistfulnessthatwastouchinginsofineaman。"Wouldn’titberatherapullsometimestohave——a——tohave——？"Hehungfire；hewantedmetohelphimbyphrasingwhathemeant。ButIcouldn’t——Ididn’tknow。Sohebroughtitout，awkwardly:"TheREALthing；agentleman，youknow，oralady。"Iwasquitereadytogiveageneralassent——Iadmittedthattherewasagreatdealinthat。ThisencouragedMajorMonarchtosay，followinguphisappealwithanunactedgulp:"It’sawfullyhard——we’vetriedeverything。"Thegulpwascommunicative；itprovedtoomuchforhiswife。BeforeIknewitMrs。Monarchhaddroppedagainuponadivanandburstintotears。Herhusbandsatdownbesideher，holdingoneofherhands；whereuponshequicklydriedhereyeswiththeother，whileIfeltembarrassedasshelookedupatme。

"Thereisn’taconfoundedjobIhaven’tappliedfor——waitedfor——

prayedfor。Youcanfancywe’dbeprettybadfirst。Secretaryshipsandthatsortofthing？Youmightaswellaskforapeerage。I’dbeANYTHING——I’mstrong；amessengeroracoalheaver。I’dputonagold—lacedcapandopencarriage—doorsinfrontofthehaberdasher’s；

I’dhangaboutastation，tocarryportmanteaus；I’dbeapostman。

Buttheywon’tLOOKatyou；therearethousands，asgoodasyourself，alreadyontheground。GENTLEMEN，poorbeggars，whohavedrunktheirwine，whohavekepttheirhunters！"

IwasasreassuringasIknewhowtobe，andmyvisitorswerepresentlyontheirfeetagainwhile，fortheexperiment，weagreedonanhour。WewerediscussingitwhenthedooropenedandMissChurmcameinwithawetumbrella。MissChurmhadtotaketheomnibustoMaidaValeandthenwalkhalf—a—mile。Shelookedatrifleblowsyandslightlysplashed。Iscarcelyeversawhercomeinwithoutthinkingafreshhowodditwasthat，beingsolittleinherself，sheshouldyetbesomuchinothers。ShewasameagrelittleMissChurm，butshewasanampleheroineofromance。Shewasonlyafreckledcockney，butshecouldrepresenteverything，fromafineladytoashepherdess；shehadthefaculty，asshemighthavehadafinevoiceorlonghair。

Shecouldn’tspell，andshelovedbeer，butshehadtwoorthree"points，"andpractice，andaknack，andmother—wit，andakindofwhimsicalsensibility，andaloveofthetheatre，andsevensisters，andnotanounceofrespect，especiallyfortheH。Thefirstthingmyvisitorssawwasthatherumbrellawaswet，andintheirspotlessperfectiontheyvisiblywincedatit。Therainhadcomeonsincetheirarrival。

"I’mallinasoak；thereWASamessofpeopleinthe’bus。Iwishyoulivednearastytion，"saidMissChurm。Irequestedhertogetreadyasquicklyaspossible，andshepassedintotheroominwhichshealwayschangedherdress。Butbeforegoingoutsheaskedmewhatshewastogetintothistime。

"It’stheRussianprincess，don’tyouknow？"Ianswered；"theonewiththe’goldeneyes，’inblackvelvet，forthelongthingintheCheapside。"

"Goldeneyes？ISAY！"criedMissChurm，whilemycompanionswatchedherwithintensityasshewithdrew。Shealwaysarrangedherself，whenshewaslate，beforeIcouldturnround；andIkeptmyvisitorsalittle，onpurpose，sothattheymightgetanidea，fromseeingher，whatwouldbeexpectedofthemselves。Imentionedthatshewasquitemynotionofanexcellentmodel——shewasreallyveryclever。

"DoyouthinkshelookslikeaRussianprincess？"MajorMonarchasked，withlurkingalarm。

"WhenImakeher，yes。"

"Oh，ifyouhavetoMAKEher——！"hereasoned，acutely。

"That’sthemostyoucanask。Therearesomanythatarenotmakeable。"

"Wellnow，HERE’Salady"——andwithapersuasivesmilehepassedhisarmintohiswife’s——"who’salreadymade！"

"Oh，I’mnotaRussianprincess，"Mrs。Monarchprotested，alittlecoldly。Icouldseethatshehadknownsomeanddidn’tlikethem。

There，immediately，wasacomplicationofakindthatIneverhadtofearwithMissChurm。

Thisyoungladycamebackinblackvelvet——thegownwasratherrustyandverylowonherleanshoulders——andwithaJapanesefaninherredhands。IremindedherthatinthesceneIwasdoingshehadtolookoversomeone’shead。"Iforgetwhoseitis；butitdoesn’tmatter。Justlookoverahead。"

"I’dratherlookoverastove，"saidMissChurm；andshetookherstationnearthefire。Shefellintoposition，settledherselfintoatallattitude，gaveacertainbackwardinclinationtoherheadandacertainforwarddrooptoherfan，andlooked，atleasttomyprejudicedsense，distinguishedandcharming，foreignanddangerous。

Weleftherlookingso，whileIwentdown—stairswithMajorandMrs。

Monarch。

"IthinkIcouldcomeaboutasnearitasthat，"saidMrs。Monarch。

"Oh，youthinkshe’sshabby，butyoumustallowforthealchemyofart。"

However，theywentoffwithanevidentincreaseofcomfort，foundedontheirdemonstrableadvantageinbeingtherealthing。IcouldfancythemshudderingoverMissChurm。ShewasverydrollaboutthemwhenIwentback，forItoldherwhattheywanted。

"Well，ifSHEcansitI’lltyketobookkeeping，"saidmymodel。

"She’sverylady—like，"Ireplied，asaninnocentformofaggravation。

"SomuchtheworseforYOU。Thatmeansshecan’tturnround。"

"She’lldoforthefashionablenovels。"

"Ohyes，she’llDOforthem！"mymodelhumorouslydeclared。"Ain’ttheyhadenoughwithouther？"IhadoftensociablydenouncedthemtoMissChurm。

CHAPTERIII。

ItwasfortheelucidationofamysteryinoneoftheseworksthatI

firsttriedMrs。Monarch。Herhusbandcamewithher，tobeusefulifnecessary——itwassufficientlyclearthatasageneralthinghewouldprefertocomewithher。AtfirstIwonderedifthiswerefor"propriety’s"sake——ifheweregoingtobejealousandmeddling。Theideawastootiresome，andifithadbeenconfirmeditwouldspeedilyhavebroughtouracquaintancetoaclose。ButIsoonsawtherewasnothinginitandthatifheaccompaniedMrs。Monarchitwas（inadditiontothechanceofbeingwanted），simplybecausehehadnothingelsetodo。Whenshewasawayfromhimhisoccupationwasgone——sheneverHADbeenawayfromhim。Ijudged，rightly，thatintheirawkwardsituationtheircloseunionwastheirmaincomfortandthatthisunionhadnoweakspot。Itwasarealmarriage，anencouragementtothehesitating，anutforpessimiststocrack。

Theiraddresswashumble（Irememberafterwardsthinkingithadbeentheonlythingaboutthemthatwasreallyprofessional），andIcouldfancythelamentablelodgingsinwhichtheMajorwouldhavebeenleftalone。Hecouldbearthemwithhiswife——hecouldn’tbearthemwithouther。

Hehadtoomuchtacttotryandmakehimselfagreeablewhenhecouldn’tbeuseful；sohesimplysatandwaited，whenIwastooabsorbedinmyworktotalk。ButIlikedtomakehimtalk——itmademywork，whenitdidn’tinterruptit，lesssordid，lessspecial。Tolistentohimwastocombinetheexcitementofgoingoutwiththeeconomyofstayingathome。Therewasonlyonehindrance:thatI

seemednottoknowanyofthepeopleheandhiswifehadknown。I

thinkhewonderedextremely，duringthetermofourintercourse，whomthedeuceIDIDknow。Hehadn’tastraysixpenceofanideatofumblefor；sowedidn’tspinitveryfine——weconfinedourselvestoquestionsofleatherandevenofliquor（saddlersandbreeches—makersandhowtogetgoodclaretcheap），andmatterslike"goodtrains"andthehabitsofsmallgame。Hisloreontheselastsubjectswasastonishing，hemanagedtointerweavethestation—masterwiththeornithologist。Whenhecouldn’ttalkaboutgreaterthingshecouldtalkcheerfullyaboutsmaller，andsinceIcouldn’taccompanyhimintoreminiscencesofthefashionableworldhecouldlowertheconversationwithoutavisibleefforttomylevel。

Soearnestadesiretopleasewastouchinginamanwhocouldsoeasilyhaveknockedonedown。Helookedafterthefireandhadanopiniononthedraughtofthestove，withoutmyaskinghim，andI

couldseethathethoughtmanyofmyarrangementsnothalfcleverenough。IremembertellinghimthatifIwereonlyrichIwouldofferhimasalarytocomeandteachmehowtolive。Sometimeshegavearandomsigh，ofwhichtheessencewas:"GivemeevensuchabareoldbarrackasTHIS，andI’ddosomethingwithit！"WhenI

wantedtousehimhecamealone；whichwasanillustrationofthesuperiorcourageofwomen。Hiswifecouldbearhersolitarysecondfloor，andshewasingeneralmorediscreet；showingbyvarioussmallreservesthatshewasalivetotheproprietyofkeepingourrelationsmarkedlyprofessional——notlettingthemslideintosociability。ShewishedittoremainclearthatsheandtheMajorwereemployed，notcultivated，andifsheapprovedofmeasasuperior，whocouldbekeptinhisplace，sheneverthoughtmequitegoodenoughforanequal。

Shesatwithgreatintensity，givingthewholeofhermindtoit，andwascapableofremainingforanhouralmostasmotionlessasifshewerebeforeaphotographer’slens。Icouldseeshehadbeenphotographedoften，butsomehowtheveryhabitthatmadehergoodforthatpurposeunfittedherformine。AtfirstIwasextremelypleasedwithherlady—likeair，anditwasasatisfaction，oncomingtofollowherlines，toseehowgoodtheywereandhowfartheycouldleadthepencil。ButafterafewtimesIbegantofindhertooinsurmountablystiff；dowhatIwouldwithitmydrawinglookedlikeaphotographoracopyofaphotograph。Herfigurehadnovarietyofexpression——sheherselfhadnosenseofvariety。Youmaysaythatthiswasmybusiness，wasonlyaquestionofplacingher。Iplacedherineveryconceivableposition，butshemanagedtoobliteratetheirdifferences。Shewasalwaysaladycertainly，andintothebargainwasalwaysthesamelady。Shewastherealthing，butalwaysthesamething。ThereweremomentswhenIwasoppressedbytheserenityofherconfidencethatsheWAStherealthing。Allherdealingswithmeandallherhusband’swereanimplicationthatthiswasluckyforME。MeanwhileIfoundmyselftryingtoinventtypesthatapproachedherown，insteadofmakingherowntransformitself——

inthecleverwaythatwasnotimpossible，forinstance，topoorMissChurm。ArrangeasIwouldandtaketheprecautionsIwould，shealways，inmypictures，cameouttootall——landingmeinthedilemmaofhavingrepresentedafascinatingwomanassevenfeethigh，which，outofrespectperhapstomyownverymuchscantierinches，wasfarfrommyideaofsuchapersonage。